Eyes of the Devil

“Hey, wake up.”

Gerard let out a weak whimper of pain, hardly wanting to move.

“Hey mom! I think he’s awake!” the voice called again. It sounded like it belonged to a kid. Gerard found that he was lying on his back, on what felt like a tiled floor. Someone tilted his chin back with one finger and poured an ice-cold liquid down his throat. It settled into his stomach like a rock, almost making him feel sick.

“There, that should help,” said a warm, feminine voice. Gerard drowsily opened his eyes to see a woman staring down at him with a sweet smile. “Better?”

“Nn…who…wh-”

“Don’t try to talk just yet. You need to rest.” Gerard sat up anyway, and a dizzying headache slammed into him.

“What happened?” he murmured, holding one hand to his forehead.

“It’s difficult to explain,” the woman said in a calm, clear tone. “I’m not too surprised you fainted, though. I mean, he did go a little far.”

“What are you talking about?” Gerard asked, bewildered. He finally decided to open his eyes and was shocked at what he saw. The huge hallway seemed to be made entirely of polished glass, though the walls were white and opaque like marble, threaded with shifting rainbow colors. Clouds rolled in over the floor, sparkling in the light streaming in across the tops of the walls. There was no ceiling, and when he tried to glance up to study it, he could only see a brilliant, dazzling blue sky.

“My daddy likes to scare people,” said the kid, suddenly appearing next to him and grinning. “He’s good at it too.”

“Your…dad?” he whispered in amazement, looking at the child in wide-eyed shock. The boy wore black jeans and a t-shirt for some band Gerard had never heard of, standing out sharply against the white background. “But that means-”

“Mikey!” the kid shouted suddenly, running towards something behind Gerard. He turned around to look at it, wincing slightly when another jolt of pain shot through the middle of his chest.

“Oh my God…er, sorry,” said a new voice. Gerard’s eyes widened.

“Mikey?”

It was Mikey alright. But he was different from anything Gerard had ever seen. Still as thin as ever, wearing jeans and a black t-shirt, this Mikey had a pair of perfect white wings protruding from his back.

“What are you doing here?!” Mikey asked crossly. “You know you’re not allowed within this realm!”

“Michael, stop it,” said the woman, standing up and helping Gerard to his feet. “It’s alright.” Mikey seemed to catch on at that moment, but he was suddenly distracted by the kid poking him in the leg.

“Are you going to help me with my flying today?” he asked, hope sparkling in his large eyes. Mikey knelt down to his level.

“Not right now, but soon. Tell you what; why don’t you go practice, and I’ll meet you out there, okay?” Mikey said in a quiet tone. The kid nodded vigorously and ran out of the hallway.

“Be careful, Angel,” the woman called after him in a sweet, musical tone.

“Why is he here?” Mikey asked accusingly, though sounding significantly calmer than he had moments earlier.

“Gee went a little overboard,” the woman responded with a sigh, as if this was familiar to her. “He scared poor Gerard here so badly that…well, let’s just say he couldn’t handle it.”

“I don’t know, wouldn’t you be freaked if you found out that you were- or…you in the…future…uh…what?” Gerard said quietly. The woman let out a warm laugh and placed a hand on his shoulder, smiling at him again. One corner of his mouth twinged upward in an attempted grin, but he was too confused to really mean it.

“Don’t put too much thought into it, Gerard. I’ll speak to him about it,” she assured him.

“So… Who are you?” he asked, still ignoring an extremely agitated Mikey. The woman brushed a few loose black pieces of hair out of her face – straight at the top and then curling into twists about halfway down, he noticed – and smiled, showing rows of perfect teeth.

“I’m God.”

Gerard blinked, then slowly raised one finger and pointed at her, bending his arm at the elbow.

“You’re…”

“Yes, I know,” she said, interrupting him. Gerard decided she looked more like something from a punk rock concert than the ruler of Heaven. Or at least, it wasn’t what he had imagined. “Not what you had in mind, was I?”

“No!” Gerard exclaimed, hoping he hadn’t insulted her. “I just-”

“It’s fine,” she said with another light laugh. “I’m used to it. But enough about me. Are you alright?”

“What do you mean? Except for…this…I feel fine,” he responded, pointing one finger at his chest. She smiled sadly.

“I’m afraid I can only take away the pain…” She placed one hand on his chest, and suddenly the consistent throbbing and burning dissolved into a cool, iced-over feeling, though he still felt something nudging against his heart whenever he fidgeted. “…But not remove the source.”

“…Thank you,” he said slowly. “But…what is it, exactly?”

“He didn’t tell you?!” she exclaimed crossly. “He’s so frustrating sometimes!”

“You should probably calm down,” said Mikey, whose face had suddenly gone white. “You don’t want to cause another earthquake down there…”

“Right, right,” she said, taking a deep breath. “Sorry.” She noticed Gerard was looking at her with wide, terrified eyes.

“…What happened?” he asked quietly. It was the only question he dared to say aloud.

“You were shot, Gerard,” Mikey said coldly. “Back home in Jersey. I don’t know how you could forget that.”

“You know exactly how,” the woman snapped at him. “No one can remember dying unless they committed suicide. You know that better than anyone, Michael.”

Gerard felt his breathing become shallow and uneven.

“Dead?” he asked numbly, the word just fluttering past his open lips like a gray butterfly. “I’m…dead?”

“You’ve been dead,” Mikey said flatly, glaring at him. “In fact, I can’t believe you didn’t realize it s-”

“THAT IS ENOUGH!!” the woman roared at him, her voice much deeper and more ominous. Mikey suddenly looked a lot less intimidating. “I will not have you insult him for one more second! Leave immediately!”

“But-”

“Not one more word. Leave,” she snarled, accenting each word clearly. She pointed to the end of the hallway, her eyes burning with anger. “Go teach my son how to fly until I can deal with you.” Mikey let out a sigh, but obliged and turned around, allowing his wings to carry him outside. Gerard simply stared after him in complete disbelief.

“I’m really sorry, Gerard. Ignore him.”

Gerard wasn’t listening. He couldn’t explain it, but a sudden sadness had overwhelmed him at Mikey’s scathing words. He had already taken about as much as he could handle from that other version of himself. Having his own brother attack him as well was more than he could take.

“…Gerard? Are you alright?”

He wasn’t entirely sure what happened next, but moments later he realized she was embracing him as he sobbed into her shoulder, feeling worse than he ever had before. She tried to calm him down, whispering softly into his ear, but nothing seemed to take effect for several minutes.

His breathing finally did return to normal, and his heartrending cries were diminished into small, puppy-like whines. He pulled away from her, looking at her with large red-rimmed eyes.

“I’m s-sorry,” he stuttered, looking down at the floor and roughly brushing away his tears with the back of his sleeve.

“It’s alright,” she said softly. “I understand. It just…takes some getting used to.”

“It…takes some ‘getting used to’?” Gerard repeated. She nodded. “You act like this is so simple! It’s not like moving to a new city or getting a new job! My life is over!”

She said nothing and turned away from him, folding her arms in front of herself.

“And you think this is any easier?”

He sighed.

“Look…I don’t want any part of this. I never did. Is there any way I can just leave?”

“Humans are all the same,” she muttered flatly, turning back to face him now. “They think Heaven’s supposed to be perfect and I’m supposed to fix all their problems. If there’s one thing I won’t do, it’s make everyone else’s lives better. Don’t think you’re going to get out of this just because I love you. You’re not off any easier than anyone else as far as I’m concerned.” By now Gerard was blankly staring at her, completely lost.

“What are you talking about?” he managed to ask. She sighed in exasperation.

“You need to make a choice. Heaven or Hell. There is no other option.”

“I already tried to make a choice,” Gerard answered. “But I was told it wasn’t the best one, and then I was brought here.” He stepped closer to her, glaring darkly. “I have no control over what’s happening to me every minute of the day. I don’t want to go to Heaven or Hell. I want to be done with this.”

She sighed at his words, tucking a lock of darkened hair behind her ear.

“Look, I can’t do this for you. I-”

“Mommy! Mommy!” The kid came scampering into the hallway with a tired-looking Mikey not far behind. “I can take off from the cloud now! Wanna see?!”

“I tried to stop him, really I-”

“Oh, shut up Michael. That’s wonderful, Angel,” she said in an excited tone. “Let’s see.”

“Okay!”

Gerard blinked once, and a pair of midnight-black bat wings appeared on the child’s back. No lights or smoke or anything; they were just there. The boy crouched low to the ground and jumped into the air, his wings folding back as he gained height. It wasn’t long, however, before he began to spiral back towards the floor, crashing headfirst into the tile much like an airplane. Gerard was about to rush to the child’s aid, but he was on his feet in a heartbeat, shaking his head and looking extremely dizzy.

“Okay…so it’s not perfect yet. It’s easier outside though,” he said sheepishly, walking back towards them.

“I’m sure you’ll get it soon,” the woman said with a smile, picking him up and spinning him in a circle. He burst into laughter. Somewhere in the process, Gerard could have sworn he saw the wings disappear, but he couldn’t be sure. Eventually she simply hugged the child close, balancing him on one hip and smiling at him.

“Can I go visit Dad today?” he asked excitedly. She sighed.

“Well, alright.” She pointed at Gerard. “Why don’t you take him with you?”

“Okay! That’ll be fun!” He wriggled out of her arms and landed on his feet, jogging over to Gerard and reaching up to grab his hand.

“Just be careful, alright?” she called as the boy began running toward the end of the hallway, dragging Gerard along with strength no child should possess.

“Yeah, I know,” the kid said hurriedly, breaking into a run and pulling Gerard along with him. They left the walls of the strange hall and burst into the blinding sunlight, causing the older of the two to squint just to be able to see. The boy was picking up more speed as he ran along the cloud, which Gerard’s feet were barely touching by now. The miniature wings appeared on the child’s back again as the stunning blue field filled Gerard’s vision entirely-

And then he was falling again.