Darling, Be Human

“Nicholas!” I gasped. “What the fuck!?”

My brother’s eyes widen in a mixture of surprise and excitement when he realized that his contraption had worked. I looked down at myself saw the mixture of eggs and poster paint slowly slide down the front of my shirt.

“Damn it Nicholas!” I screamed, “I’m gonna beat your fucking face in!”

Nick’s eyebrows rose a considerable amount until they were at a risk for disappearing into his hairline altogether. Finally realizing how vital it was for him to run for his life, Nick turned around and took off, running in search of cover. I took off after him, determined to inflict payback in the form of pain.

I saw Nick making a beeline for the bus, so I took a shortcut, thinking to head him off. On the way there I pushed past people, even knocking one or two aside. I called some apologies over my shoulder, but still made a mental note to go back and give them a proper apology later on.

I turned the corner at the end of my boyfriend’s bus, only to run straight into him and knock us both off balance. I clung tightly to him as we fell to the ground, and hissed in pain when I felt my elbow scrape against the blacktop.

“Adelyn?” Alex asked in surprise.

“Sorry babe,” I huffed as I pushed myself up from the ground, “gotta run.” I said, and then took off once again, leaving a stunned, paint and egg lathered, Alex in my wake.

Coming around the edge of our bus I spotted Nick approaching the door from the opposite direction. I sprinted toward him as fast as I could and managed to catch him around the waist just before he got through the door.

“Adelyn Paige!” Nick yelled after we had landed on the ground. “Get off of me!”

I held one of his shoulders down, putting my full weight on that one side and then punched him in the stomach.

“Addy!” He gasped for breath, “no sucker punches!”

Disregarding his words, I punched him again in the same spot, earning myself a few more curse words before I got up. Leaving my brother lying here he was, I stalked off toward the bus.

“Adelyn?”

I looked up and saw Alex approaching, his eyes wide in wonder.

“What’s all this about?” He said, nodding to my ruined top and then motioned to his own shirt.

“Nick was being a dick,” I grumbled, “and I haven’t done my fucking laundry yet.”

Despite the mess on our clothes, Alex managed a small, amused smile before he reached over, taking my hand in his. “Come on,” he said, “I just did my laundry this morning. I know how much you love waltzing around in my clothes.” He teased.

“Mainly just your button down shirts,” I admitted.

“With nothing on underneath?” Alex asked shyly.

“Maybe a pair of panties,” I added, “most of the time, a pair of panties.”

Alex laughed quietly before he released my hand to tug off his shirt and then tossed it into garbage can that was set up near their bus. He made a move to reach for my hand but stopped, and instead seized the hem of my top. Before I had time to protest, my top was gone and in the trash, leaving me in just my bra.

“Alex,” I gasped, covering my chest with my arms.

My boyfriend merely shot me a mischievous smile and then wrapped his arms around me. With my chest now pressed flush with his, I lowered my arms to wrap them around his middle.

“You’re going to get me in trouble with my brother,” I muttered, “once he hears I was running around the lot topless, he’s going to have a fit.”

Alex leaned over, pressing his lips to my temple and then rested his head against mine. “It’s not like we’re going to be parading around; we’re at the bus right now.”

With that, he quickly punched in the code to the door and opened it. Glancing around to make sure nobody was watching, he released me and let me go up the steps first before following me. When I reached the top of the steps, Alex reached over and smacked my butt hard enough to make it sting.

“Damn it, Alex,” I said, “stop it!”

Alex merely laughed in response and then placed his hands on my hips from behind, steering me toward the back of the bus. We stopped at the bunks and after I heard voices drifting down the hallway from the back lounge, I encouraged Alex to hurry up.

“Yeah, yeah,” he mumbled as he shifted through a pile of shirts. “Here,” he said, handing me a black Hurley shirt. “You want some shorts too?”

I looked down, examining my paint and egg splatter pants, and then sighed heavily. “Yes,” I grumbled. “Please.”

After grabbing a shirt for himself, Alex moved on to a different pile that was composed of both pants and shorts. While I waited, I undid my pants and pushed them to the ground. I kicked them off of my feet, sending them down to the end of the hallway where they bounced off the back door. In a half a second, the door opened and Jack and Vinny looked out. Since I was only wearing a pair of panties and a t-shirt, both boys gave me a questioning look.

“Nick ruined my outfit,” I told them, “Alex offered a new one.”

Alex looked up at me, giving me a questioning look of his own. “Babe, who are you – Hey! Get outta here!” Alex quickly wrapped his spare shirt around me in an attempt to hide my bottom half from the boys at the end of the hall.

“Relax,” Jack smirked, “it’s not like she was naked.”

“I don’t care,” Alex huffed, “get the fuck outta here.”

“It’s no different than a bikini, babe,” I grinned, “chillax.”

Alex didn’t reply, but rather pulled me behind him as he stood up, all the while giving his friends a mean look. Jack and Vinny, however, were clearly amused by the whole situation, and they closed the door with smiles on either of their faces.

“Protective much?” I teased.

Alex blushed softly as he lowered his shirt. “Kinda.” He admitted before handing me a pair of shorts.

I pulled them on and then rolled them up a couple of times at the waistband so that they weren’t so long on me. When we were done getting dressed, we made our way back to the front of the bus and claimed one of the couches for ourselves.

“Want to play some video games?” Alex asked.

“Sure,” I replied, “but … I’m kinda hungry too.”

Alex got back up and began setting up the PS3. “Chinese takeout?” He asked, glancing over his shoulder.

“Is there a place nearby?” I wondered.

“One down the street,” he told me. “It’s pretty good. I usually eat there whenever we stop by this venue.” He admitted as he handed me a controller.

“Would you mind making a quick run?”

Alex changed the television to the appropriate input and then set the remote aside. As I watched, he kneeled down in front of me before cupping my face in his hands. He placed a few kisses here and there, every single kiss being in a place he knew I loved to be kissed. When he was done, he tilted my head slightly so that I could look up at him.

“A half order of pork friend rice and a half order of sweet and sour pork?” He questioned.

I smiled and nodded my head. “You finally remembered, after two years of knowing me.”

Alex returned a smile and then kissed my forehead quickly before he stood up. “I figured it out the second time I treated you to Chinese food,” he admitted, “but I kinda like the idea of you ordering me around.”

“I’ll be sure to do it more often, then,” I smirked, “instead of just in the bed.”

My boyfriend laughed in amusement, his brown eyes lighting up as he did so. He pointed to the television and then sighed softly.

“It’s ready.” He informed me. “I don’t know if you’ve played this before. Jack or Vinny can give you a crash course if you can’t figure it out. I’ll be back as soon as I can.”

“Alright, babe,” I said. “Be careful. Don’t let any of those fan boys steal you.” I joked.

Alex smiled softly but didn’t say anything in response. With a small wave, he turned around and disappeared down the steps, leaving me with a game that I had no idea how to play. I quickly called Jack and Vinny into the room and they showed me what to do. I had a half mind to invite them to stay and play while waiting for Alex, but after Jack attempted, and failed, to grope up on my leg, I kicked them out.

I played by myself for an unknown amount of time; while engrossed in video games time always seems to fly by. Before I knew it, Alex appeared at the top of the steps, carrying a brown paper bag in one hand while the other held onto various sorts of trinkets, and I saw a board game tucked underneath one arm.

“Ran into some fans,” he explained, “they asked me to give you these.” He said, handing me what I had thought to be trinkets at first, but realized that they were a bunch of homemade necklaces.

“Oh,” I smiled, “how nice. Did you catch their names?”

“Nancy and Tamara. Wait … Tammie? … Tracy? Oh, babe, I honestly can’t remember.” He sighed. “And, they heard that our Candyland got destroyed so they got us a new one.” He added as he set the board game down on the table.

I watched Alex as he made his way around the area, locating a couple cans of root beer and some eating utensils, and then made his way back to me.

After take a seat next to me, he starting to unpack our food. “Figure it out?” He asked, referring to the video game.

“Jack and Vinny helped me out.” I said, pausing the game as he handed me a box. “I kicked them out because Jack was getting fresh with me again.”

Alex laughed softly as he handed me another box. “I don’t blame him; I don’t think the guy’s gotten laid since the last time we toured together.”

“No wonder,” I smirked.

Alex pulled out a small, collapsible table from underneath the couch and set it up so that we had a place to set our things while we ate. Before long we fell quiet while either of us enjoyed our early dinner. We exchanged a few words every once in a while, and Alex repeatedly had to fight off my quick fork as I stole an orange chicken or two every other minute.

“So,” I said after I felt myself getting full, “I told my mom and pops that you and I are together.”

Alex glanced at me for a split second before turning his gaze back to his food. “Oh?” He asked. “Are they … well, do they approve?”

“They’re glad,” I said, “apparently they were able to see that we had feelings for each other.” I shrugged my shoulders. “But then again, it seems like everybody was able to pick up on that.”

“Where do you think we would be if I hadn’t messed around for two years and asked you to be my girlfriend sooner?” Alex asked.

“What do you mean?”

“I mean,” Alex paused, licking his lips before he set aside his box of rice, “do you think we’d be living in California? Or would we be living in Maryland? Would we be married? Would we have kids? That kind of stuff.”

“Oh,” I said offhandedly. “Well, I don’t really know.”

“This might sound kind of … strange, but … I think by now we would have been married.” Alex glanced over at me, a confused look on his face. “Is this weirding you out? Talking like this and stuff? I mean, I know we’ve only been together for a couple of weeks and stuff, but … can I tell you something?”

I smiled softly at my boyfriend’s rambling and then nodded my head. “Tell me anything.” I encouraged.

“It seems like we’ve already been together for two years,” he muttered, “all the things that we do … it’s not any different than what we’ve been doing every since the day we met. Except now I can kiss you in front of anybody, I can hold your hand and not have anyone question it. Now … I can rest soundly at night because I know that nobody else would come in and steal you away from me. Does it … is that how it feels for you too? Like we’ve been together all along?”

“Yeah,” I agreed. “It does feel like that, now that you’ve pointed it out.”

Alex laughed quietly and then reached over, lacing his fingers with mine. “What do you think everyone would think if we ran off and got hitched before the end of tour?”

“They’d probably think I was pregnant.” I said truthfully.

“I think we should get married.” Alex said. “Not right away, but one day … one day we should get married.”

“Maybe,” I whispered, “maybe one day when we’re ready.”

“I’m ready,” Alex replied softly. I knew he wasn’t trying to force me into agreeing to anything, he was simply just putting his thoughts and opinions out there. “Ever since I’ve met you, you’ve been the only girl in my life, and we weren’t even together. Now that I have you,” he paused, sighed quietly as he tightened his hand around mine, “I’m set for life.”

I reached over, running my fingers up and down his arm a couple of times before I rested my head on his shoulder. “I’m not ready yet.” I admitted.

“I know,” he said, “one day, when you’ll ready, I’ll drop down on one knee and hand you a ring. He smiled. “I’ll do it right, I promise.”

At that moment I couldn’t help but imagine at least ten different silly scenarios as to how Alex could possibly propose. I smiled to myself and then closed my eyes. It was then and there that I realized that Alex would be the boy that I married. It may take two months, it may take two years, but sooner or later I would walk down the aisle and become Mrs. Alexander Gaskarth. It was just a matter of time.