Speechless

“Baby can you get that?” Gabe yelled from the bathroom as the ring tone drowned the bottom story of the house.

I rolled my eyes letting my vouge drop out of my hands hitting the sofa with a thud. I pushed myself up running to the phone. “Oh shoot …”

“Hey, this is Gabey and Baby sorry we can’t make it to the phone right now, Baby’s waxing my crack leave a message after the beep sucka!” The answering machine took over as I paced around tucking a strand of hair behind my ear.

“Gabriel, where is she? What happened to Monday, it’s already been two weeks. Fuck sake man you know we run a tight schedule here. Just because she’s your little girlfriend doesn’t mean you can fuck us over as much as you’re fucking her-”

Everything just seemed to stop … I couldn’t find the air to fill my burning lungs, I couldn’t even think. Nothing made sense at all.

“What the fuck?!” Gabe was screaming at the phone.

He … said he loved me …

“You fucking rewind everything!”

He promised me so much.

“What the fuck did you hear!?” He pointed his finger at me.

I shook – crying screams fell from my mouth as I made a run for the door.

“What the fuck did you hear?!” He yelled in my ear as he grabbed the door handle slamming it shut in the result of me slamming into the door and him into my back.

“Gabey, please,” I whispered weakly between sobs, “You’re hurting me,”

“What did you hear,” He said through his teeth grabbing my arm and twisting it behind my back.

“I don’t know –”

“What do you mean you don’t know?! What the fuck do you mean when you heard everything!” He pulled me away from the door throwing my on the floor before climbing on top of me grabbing a hold of my arms. He just laughed as I gasped for air as his body crashed on my chest.

“Gabe, get off me!” I screamed

~

Justin’s Point Of View

“Look Justin. I feel for the safety of my daughter and grandson I don’t want you around them.”

I felt my teeth grind against each other. This was my fucking son she was talking about. Who on earth did she think she was!?

“Ma’am. Can’t he just see Blake?” Usher placed a hand on my shoulder. You could see the sadness in his eyes; truth be told it was because I could tell he was thinking about him being in this situation and having someone tell him he couldn’t see his kids. I knew that man through and through.

She shook her head. “It’s best Justin doesn’t. So, so he doesn’t become attached.”

“But this is my son,” I frowned. “I have every right to see him! I deserve to see him!”

“And if anyone gets a glimpse of this, you will put Tilly and Blake in danger! Would you like people attacking your own flesh and blood?!”

If she wasn’t a woman … she would not be standing up right.

“Can I at least see what he looks like” I didn’t state it in a question form because I had no right to.

“Justin –”

“Look, Ma’am,” Usher stepped in front of me. “You know we have every right to take legal action on what you are doing. This is Justin’s son; he has every god damn right to see his baby boy. You are being completely unrealistic and you will be the one to blame if this becomes public because of your ignorance.”

Her checks flushed a red. “Alright follow me,” She whispered leading us down the hallway.

“Where is Tilly?” I questioned quietly.

“School,” Her voice was bitter and soft as she stopped at the door on the left.

My heart started beating fast and my palms became sweaty.

“Here it is little bro.” Usher patted my back as I entered the room.

“I’ll give you a moment,”

“Thank you,” I whispered as she walked out the room giving me a weak smile before disappearing.

“Justin … Jus”

“Is he…”

“He’s a beautiful little boy that looks all like his Dad.” Usher smiled looking down at Blake.

I stepped close swallowing hard before looking down.

“Whoa,” I smiled to myself as I looked down at my son. “He ... that’s my baby. That’s my baby boy.” I let out a small chuckle as I stroked his plump little cheek. “It’s like a little me.”

“Well we hope this one’s a saint,” Usher smiled as Blake moved grabbing my finger holding on to it.

“He’s so warm and tiny … he smell like a baby,”

“Dude that would be because he is one,”

I looked up at Usher with a playful smug. “Shut up,”

“Ahem,” I looked back at the door seeing Tilly’s mother standing there looking frail.

I gave one last look at Usher before removing my finger from Blake’s grip. “I love you my little man,” I leaned down carefully kissing his forehead. “Don’t you forget it,” I weakly smiled feeling a lump in my throat. My son was bringing me to tears.

I walked out of the room giving my son’s grandmother a ‘thank you’ before leaving.

“Hey,” Usher nudged my shoulder as I sat in the passenger seat, tears pricking my eyes; I looked over to him ashamed. “You did so well Justin,” He smiled as I sobbed. “Justin doesn’t this make you want to continue your career so you can have something for your son to see? So you can support him?”

“I-I guess so,” I rubbed my eye’s exhaling loudly putting my seat belt on. “Yeah, I wonna support my son. I want Tilly’s stupid parents to see I’m a good kid so they will give me a chance.”

Usher smiled starting the car. “That sounds like a plane. We clean up your image no more mister ‘bad ass’ alright?” We both laughed. “C’mon kid lemme go get you a McDonald's or something.”

“That actually sounds really good,” I said as I stared out the window.