Salt in the Wound

“I don’t believe it!” The blonde boy slammed his fists down on the desk, knocking over the girl’s cup of tea. She let out a squeal and scrambled to pick it up.

“Naruto! Will you stop acting like this!” The boy ignored her and turned towards the silver haired man who watched with mild interest.

“Gaara wouldn’t attack us for no reason Kakashi! You and I both know that!” He growled and turned his fist towards his chest, shaking his head. It was hard to ignore the constant fears of the other villagers who had sworn they saw sand shinobi lurking around their village, but he knew better. “We can’t just go to war when it’s obvious it wasn’t them!” Kakashi looked over at Sakura who was busy wiping tea off of the floor and desk.

“Well who do you suppose it was Naruto?”

“I don’t know, but it sure as hell wasn’t him. There’s no reason to break our alliance and he’s not stupid.” He turned on his heal, towering over Sakura. “I bet it has something to do with that weird girl!” The pink haired girl sighed and shook her head.

“Just because she was strong enough to knock you down doesn’t me she’s strong enough to initiate a war.” He crossed his arms and looked away.

“You don’t know that. Besides,” his eyes flew to Kakashi’s eye, searching for some glimmer of hope, “we’re waiting for them to attack first right? Well, they won’t.” Kakashi shook his head at the hopeful boy, looking out the door.

“Lady Tsunade informed me today that we strike twelve days from now.” He watched the boy’s face fall, defeated. Suddenly a determined look crossed his young face and he held a tightly clenched fist up to his chin.

“I don’t care what that old woman says, I’m not fighting against the sand. As far as I’m concerned, they didn’t attack and as a noble shinobi, I refuse to fight someone who is innocent!”

----

Same dulling hair, same tired eyes, I wanted to look at least somewhat different from what I usual posed with. Sighing, I stepped away from the foggy, bothersome mirror, it was something I had been avoiding ever since Gaara brought me back to the village. My hair dripped with moisture down my shoulders and onto the floor, making a trail of dark spots as I walked over to my armoire. Tonight was a special night, almost. Gaara was holding a meeting for the sand shinobi to discuss our tactics, word had gotten out that Konoha had already had such a meeting. I slipped into my dressy shinobi gear, finding it stiff from never wearing it. Honestly, I found it kind of pointless to have fancy gear when all I would do is bloody it up. It had been a gift from Temari before I left and I figured it wouldn’t hurt to show her I would indeed put it to good use. Once I was uncomfortable, but as comfortable as I was going to get in my outfit, I shrugged off towards the bathroom. Again the mirror taunted me and I cast a glance at my slouched stance. The outfit hugged my body in a way I absolutely hated. It was too tight for my taste and whoever made had never tried to act like shinobi, movement was seriously restricted. It was dark blue in color with a high collar that buttoned. A slit ran up the leg, exposing my all too white skin. Temari might have been able to pull it off but I sure as hell couldn’t. Ironically, the faint outline of a silver dragon ran up and around the front of it, something I wasn’t entirely pleased about.

I pulled my hair up into a pair of chopsticks, eyeing the stray strands that hung down limply. They flew upwards as I sighed and walked out of the room. I wasn’t completely sure why I was so down today, looking over the fact that I hadn’t seen Gaara at all I assumed it was just a hormonal thing. These days one couldn’t be so careful, I thought as I fastened my kunai holster around my thigh. Now all I had to do was wait.

It had been two days since Gaara had admitted his fondness for me and two days without seeing him. The day after our moment he had been stuck in meeting after meeting to try and discuss the Konoha matter, not that I was being selfish or anything but it would have been nice to see him. Even if it was for just a minute. Which was why tonight was so important. As Kazekage, all meetings are held with a table of advisors. His table included his entire advisory council, his guards Kankuro and Temari, and now me. His apprentice and assistant so to speak.

I sprang up at the first knock. The door opened and Gaara stood there in white official robes. I smirked as he fumbled the hat in his hands. His eyes skimmed me and he nodded politely, stepping in. “Are you ready?” I lifted the clipboard in my hand, it was my new responsibility to record everything that was said. “Good, now we can leave.” I was slightly disappointed at his lack of affection but quickly put on a professional face as we headed for the doors outside. As soon as we stepped outside I could hear the many calls of crickets and other night animals, I turned my head towards the moon and closed my eyes. I felt his breath on my neck and shivered “You look delectable.” he purred. Slowly, I turned my face towards his, blushing fiercely. Oh Kami, forgive these impure thoughts of mine. He met my lips briefly before smirking and holding out his arm for me to take. “We have business to attend however,” I took his arm in a daze and began to walk forward with him, “you will have to wait.”

We entered a hall outside the room where many chattering voices could be heard. A line of men stood with pin straight posture, silently waiting. Temari and Kankuro eyed me playfully when we entered, immediately noticing my arm wrapped around Gaara’s. “Nice of you to show up.” Kankuro said teasingly, nudging me with his arm.

“Is everything ready?” Gaara asked, taking his arm back and leaving me with two very curious shinobi.

“We are going to have a long talk after this Ishi.” Temari flashed her signature grin at me, it disappeared as soon as Kankuro rested his arm on my shoulder.

“Not even. Ishiko and I are the very best of friends. She comes with me first.”

“Ahem, she has homework to attend to after this. She will be coming with me.” Gaara said from in front of us. They both turned towards him, similar looks of dissapointment shrouding their faces. I laughed as they mumbled to themselves, mentioning how it wasn’t fair. We got in rows of two, respectively, I stood shoulder to shoulder with the Kazekage. Each of the advisors entered first, sitting on opposite ends of the table. There were two seats left by the time Gaara and I walked in. Kankuro and Temari stood behind us, wearing stoic masks and gazing out into the room of shinobi, fuller than I had originally thought.

“We call tonight Suna’s strongest and most courageous shinobi to step forward and agree to be a part of the defense against the possible attack Konoha is planning.” The advisor farthest down from me said loudly. The ninja stood up promptly and raised their hands in perfect unison.

“I expect no less from the ninja of the sand village,” Gaara said loudly, his eyes drifting over every face. “Once our allies, Konoha’s threats are not to be taken lightly. We will not strike until they strike first. This war is not ours but theirs, and we will not tread softly. Remember, while you fight next to your fellow shinobi you are not just fighting for yourself, but for the safety of your village as well. You have all been trained in the art of war, now is your time to prove this.” He glanced over at me, nudging me with his elbow. I had been so engrossed in his words I hadn’t so much as touched my pen to the paper. I scribbled what I vaguely remembered all while mumbling apologies. “From here on you are to be prepared for an attack at any moment. Sleep with one eye open and trust no one but the people you know. There is no more Genin, Chuunin, or Jounin. You are all equals in war and you must remember that in teams, you are more likely to succeed.” Gaara finished talking only to pass the tablet to another man who spoke for at least another twenty minutes. By the time the meeting ended I was ready to sleep the night away.

-----
“Are you tired?” He said from behind me, watching me stare at the bed with longing. I nodded and turned towards him.

“How about you?” He scoffed and turned away from me.

“That’s a stupid question.” I ignored his insults, too tired to give a damn about what he said. I crawled into bed, not bothering to remove my garments.

“You’re welcome to lay down with me Gaara.” I turned my head and watched him weigh his options. “You don’t have to sleep.” A frustrated look crossed his face and he turned away from me.

“With you around, it relaxes me. I would have no choice but to sleep.” He told me almost resentfully. I smirked and rolled back around, shutting my eyes.

“Well I won’t tell anyone if you don’t want me to.” He murmured something under his breath and turned off the light. Setting his belongings on the ground, he slipped into bed with me fully clothed. “You’re warm, come closer.” I said quietly. He pulled me towards him, wrapping his hand protectively around my waist. “Thank you Gaara.”

“For what?” He said flatly.

“For everything.” Somewhere distant I heard him asking what was everything, but I found myself unable to answer back as sleep took me over.

-------

My body flung itself forward at the sound of explosives, next to me Gaara followed suit. “That smell!” I cried out clapping a hand to my face. From my open window I could hear the screams of many people a distant memory now flooding back. Gaara grabbed his gourd and aimed for the door, stopping quickly when he saw me trying to follow.

“I’m ordering you to stay here.” He said darkly, he raised his head when I promptly refused. “Don’t make this difficult Ishiko, you will do as I say, please.” He looked bothered but for a moment before turning away from me. I reached out and yelled his name, but he was gone.

“Gaara…be safe.” I whispered helplessly. I crumpled to my knees feeling utterly useless. This was all my fault, this war, these attacks, the countless deaths that hung on my shoulders. Raising my head I stared into the hall where Gaara had just been, a shadow now on my wall. A rush of air flew in behind my head, carrying the smell of burning flesh and wood. The floorboards shifted beneath me, creaking with complaints.

“So that’s what you care about most, is it?” I heard from behind me. I turned my head slightly, acknowledging the traitor with malice in my eyes.

“I was wondering when you would come for me Roka.”