We Knew That Time Would Kill Us

I couldn't get over my luck. Matt wasn't in the suite, and even long after I'd watched Evan's retreating figure disappear through the elevator doors, there was still no sign of him. Still, I knew I didn't have much time to make it look like I really was in the room all night, so I hurried, yanking open the door. I threw my coat to where it had been lying on the floor before and dove onto the sofa, managing to find the remote and turn the TV on.

Not even ten seconds later, I heard Matt fumbling with the door and I held my breath, then closed my eyes. It'd be much easier to lie to him if I was asleep.

After he finally got through the door, he stumbled on my coat I'd thrown down and he began cussing. If I weren't so confused with what had just happened out in the hallway, I would have wanted to cuss. Even so, I knew that if I didn't pretend to wake up then, he would know I was faking because I was light sleeper.

Finally he came into my view, and when he saw that I was 'half asleep', he smiled dopily. He held his arms out for a moment as if he wanted to hug me, then thought better of it and walked over—somewhat clumsily—to sit next to me.

“How was your night?” He asked quietly, seeming to be sensitive to my 'grogginess' even in his half-drunken state. I sat up next to him, feeling awkward for lying down.

“I didn't get much homework done,” The lies just came spewing out of my mouth as if I did this every day, and then I corrected myself with an inward groan. I did do this every day. “I uh—I fell asleep.” I said lamely, but the yawn I let out wasn't fake. I really was tired.

He smiled as if he thought everything was okay. “That's fine, we are in Vegas. Even if there's not much fun for you to do, homework can wait.” We both smiled at each other; him because; well... I didn't exactly know why, and I because I knew he was buzzed out of his mind. There was no way he would let me off the hook that easily under normal circumstances.

We both stood, me almost as clumsy as he was when I had a bit of a head rush. “Are you gonna go back down with Jimmy?” Matt raised a questioning eyebrow when he heard me say this, and it was only then that I caught myself. Shit.

As under the influence as he may have been, even a drunken Johnny would have caught that. Especially Matt, as I didn't talk to him enough as it was so he read into my every single word. “What—how did you—”

Hurriedly, I interrupted him and began stumbling over my words once again. “I just—you know—I uh, I figured you were going back down since it's still early.”

Again he gave me another odd look but laughed, he seemed to take my reply as a decent enough answer. “Patey, it's two AM. How long have you been asleep?” I merely shrugged and began stuttering again in response, feeling more and more tired by the second. It had been a long night. He abruptly brought my into a hug, and I slowly relaxed into it. He sure was a laid back, giddy drunk...

“Relax, P, you gotta be exhausted. You should get some more sleep,” He mumbled, keeping an arm around my shoulders as he lead me to the bedroom, as if he could hold himself up, let alone me. His arm was heavy over my shoulders, it practically weighed me down and only made me feel even more tired.

Once I hauled myself into the comfy bed, a nice change from the bunks, he smiled down at me again, but this time it was a little tense and I knew he was being completely serious. “Listen, Payton, you can tell me anything. You know I love you right?”

That caught me a little off guard, but I was getting progressively more and more tired to think too much. “I love you too, dad,” I said through a yawn, my eyelids drooping.

He laughed yet again, looking a little more at ease. “Get some sleep kid, you look like the living dead.” He said, planting a kiss on my forehead and giving my shoulder a squeeze before standing up.

After he said that, I fell asleep within minutes. Not only was I ready to drop, but I just wanted to forget about that night's events. I didn't want them to get to stuck in my head and I didn't want to think about them at all for the time being, and sleep was an excellent way of putting that off.

The next day we went straight back to the bus, tearing through the desert until we stopped at a small, run down diner for some late breakfast. I didn't want to even move from my bunk, but I knew that would be suspicious so I made myself get it together long enough to sit down and make small talk with the guys.

Last night's events were hitting me with their intended full force. I'd lied to Matt countless times, but what was new about that? And Noah, well Noah was just hilarious. Sure, he'd almost gotten me into a huge pile of shit, but the majority of last night had been fun, regardless of how it had ended. Or who it had ended with.

Evan scared me. He could be such a douchebag, then at certain points he wasn't so bad, and then toward the end it was as if he had reverted back to his asshole exterior. But those times in between, and how I felt when he made contact with me, and it was just the slightest touch.. I hadn't been so confused in a long, long time.

Ten minutes into the meal, Matt noticed I hadn't so much as touched my waffles yet and frowned in worry. “What's up, Patey?” He asked staring at me from across the table. I shifted nervously between Zacky and Johnny and only sighed in response. “You haven't even touched your food yet.” He pointed out, gesturing around the table.

All the guys had already polished off their first plate and were going for seconds. With their obvious hangovers, I honestly didn't know how they were going to be able to keep their breakfast down.

“I'm okay,” I said, partly ignoring his question as I halfheartedly answered him. I didn't see a point in lying or even trying then. I was just so confused and scared.

Giving me another look, he sighed and nodded. I could see that he was reluctant to let this go, and only did because he knew that if he pushed me, it'd more than likely cause a scene. “Okay, well... I'm gonna go get some more soda. Anybody else need anything?” He asked, somewhat tiredly as he glanced around again at the table. Everyone shrugged, just as tired as he was.

While Matt was off getting his soda, I noticed that Johnny and Zacky leaned forward in their seats slightly so they could get a better look at me. “So, what were you up to last night Patey?” Zacky asked, smirking.

Visibly, I tensed and they both took note of that. “Oh, nothing much... I fell asleep after Matt left,” I said slowly, trying to remember exactly what I had told Matt last night. My lies were catching up with me. Thankfully Matt was still off at the counter waiting for his drink, and Jimmy and Brian were as oblivious as ever.

They nodded in unison, even going as far as crossing their arms over their chests. Zacky looked amused, while Johnny looked downright worried. They were acting just a little more than suspicious.

I had other, bigger things to worry about than how odd Zacky and Johnny were acting. Like how the hell I was going to keep up with the constant web of lies I was spinning, and at that moment, something just a little more important...

There was a show tonight, and I was sure there wouldn't be any way I was going to get out of it. Even if I did have a pile of homework, Matt wouldn't let me stay back at the bus alone. Hell, he'd rather have the roadies watch me than that. Jimmy would more than likely drag me there kicking and screaming, too.

Unless Brian was right and Wretched Remorse hadn't even lasted two shows, Evan was going to be there. I couldn't help but wonder how he was going to act, what was I going to do?

My stomach bubbled with nervousness and I swallowed, even the thought of going to the show and facing Evan after what had happened the night before left a bad taste in my mouth, I couldn't imagine what it was going to be like when I got there.