Fearing Death

A month had passed since Jordyn’s trip to New York and Jon’s possessiveness had amped up to unbelievable proportions; enough to put a nanny cam in the apartment as well as buying another Mac so they could Skype while he was away on trips.

Late November was beautiful in the city, and especially on the campus of Morgan Park Academy where the trees and foliage were bountiful. Jon parked his sleek little Mercedes in his usual parking spot, it was three twenty-seven and he had three minutes to get to the field. With his MPA Wildcats baseball-style cap pulled down low as well as a pair of sunglasses on, he walked to the field house with a blue Gatorade in hand.

Some of the girls were stretching, playing catch, and chatting as the away team huddled tightly on the sidelines of the other side of the field. It wasn’t hard to spot Jordyn in her tiny white and maroon outfit, talking to Coach Bodey as her fingers played with the net of her stick absentmindedly. Her goggles hung loose around her neck and her cleats were tied tight when she jogged back over to another teammate and they commenced to warm up.

After the referee had checked all of their nets accordingly, the game was about to begin. Jon flinched when he heard an air-horn and Patrick’s shouting voice, startling most of the people in the small stadium.

“Yeah Wildcats! Jordyn you’re a beast!” He screamed before taking a seat next to Jon on the bleachers as the game started. “What, did I miss anything?” He asked, handing Jon a Coke and cracking open his own pop.

“Not yet.” Jon muttered, stomach feeling queasy as he watched the girls run up and down the field.

“Calm down, she’s going to be fine.” Patrick reassured as they spotted the number two sitting on the bench, looking rather anxious to get on the field. “Woo! Jordyn! Put Jordyn in!” Patrick hollered, waving his homemade sign that proclaimed I heart numero dos! in glitter glue.

“Are you for real right now?” Jon asked.

“Hey, it’s nice.” Patrick frowned. Undoubtedly, Patrick had been the one to make it seeing as the handwriting was rather uneven and scraggly. The game progressed and half of the first quarter was already gone. “She is fast." Patrick’s eyes trained on Jordyn’s figure as she zipped up and down the field. “Like… shit!” He laughed. It was true, Jordyn turned into a small maroon blur when she ran, she was light and short, her legs taking fast strides. “We should put her in track.” He added.

“She is really fast.” Jon nodded in agreeance, a grin spreading across his lips as Jordyn passed the passed the solid rubber ball to her teammate before she could launch it into the opponent’s net.

“Woo, Jordyn!” Patrick screamed, jumping to his feet. “An assist!” He laughed as Jon stood, clapping as well. It was hard letting his joy overcome his worry for her. “Come on, lighten up, Pops.” Patrick elbowed his captain in the side. “They’re kicking ass, she wants to make you proud!”

After the first half, Jon meandered down the bleachers to the player’s bench while they rested for a few moments.

“Hi.” Jordyn chirped, bouncing up from the bench, ponytail flopping as she approached him.

“Brought you something to drink.” He said, handing over the Gatorade that was dripping with condensation.

“Thank you.” She smiled, still absolutely giddy. “Did you see the pass I made?” She asked, biting her lip softly as Jon and Coach Bodey made brief eye contact.

“I did, good job, babe.” He gave her shoulder a squeeze. “Drink up.” He insisted. “You need to keep your energy.” He added. “And watch your elbows, keep them tight.” He finished, making her nod in understanding. He watched her down half the Gatorade before heading back up the bleachers to take his seat by Patrick.

“She seems excited.” Patrick remarked.

“She is.” Jon nodded, looking all around to see that the men’s lacrosse team had already showed up to warm up for their own game. He didn’t like the way they watched the girl’s team in their small, mesh skirts and sleeveless jerseys. Pulling his hat down lower over his eyes, he liked this less and less as time went on. “She’s going to get hurt.” He shook his head.

“She’s too fast, no one can catch her.” Patrick shook his head. “You gotta give her a little credit, Jon, give it a chance.” He insisted.

During the third quarter, Jordyn got her chance on the field again, her teammates tossing the ball to her as she ended up in the opponent’s half first, the goalie waiting and poised to leap. Cradling it expertly in her net, she dodged around to the other side of the crease without stepping in it before launching the ball hard into the back of the net, edging out the goalie.

Jon hopped up from his seat excitedly as her teammates crowded around her, celebrating their lead. Jordyn looked up into the stands excitedly, beaming at Jon who returned the gesture, clapping for her proudly. However, their celebration was cut short when Patrick spotted him. A photographer going crazy as he snapped photos of Jordyn with her team, including the fact that the back of her jersey read Toews. Patrick pointed the man out to Jon and it was mere seconds before Jon was in the man’s face.

“Delete those!” He insisted, cheeks red and face furious. “You have no right to take pictures of her! Delete them right now!” Rage coursed through Jon’s body as Patrick was quick to join them as well. The tiniest bit of self-restraint he still possessed kept him from grabbing the expensive camera and smashing it to pieces on the concrete.

“Look man, take off.” Patrick growled at the photographer who grinned, taking a few more shots of a red-faced Jon before disappearing into the parking lot.

“Fuck.” Jon sighed, rubbing his hands all over his face and pressing the heels of his palms into his eyes.

“Forget it, Jon. Jordyn wants you here to watch the game, so we’re going to watch the game and deal with this later.” Patrick ushered back up to the bleachers. Jon nodded, taking out his cell and sending a mass text to his mother and father, his agent, and his lawyer stating that someone had been taking photos of Jordyn today.

“This isn’t going to end well.” Jon shook his head. “Not at all.”

As happy as Jon wanted to be for Jordyn as she ran out of the locker rooms to jump on him, celebrating her two goals, his mind was elsewhere.

“Did you like it?” She asked, hopping along as he held her hand tightly, his other hand occupied by the small duffel she carried her equipment and uniform in.

“I did, you did so good.” Jon smiled, squeezing her hand softly.

“Good enough for… ice cream?” She asked, grinning as she looked up at Patrick.

“Hell yeah!” Patrick cheered, earning a dirty look from Jon. “I mean heck yeah!” He added, making Jordyn giggle.

Jon wanted her to enjoy while she could, unsure of what would be coming now that people would undoubtedly find out about her.

•••

Captain Serious loses his cool!

Jonathan Toews’ secret child.

Toews’ NoDak Secret!

What are Jonathan Toews and Patrick Kane doing at a middle school lacrosse game? Turn to page six to find out!

“Why are there pictures of me in here?” Jordyn asked from Jon’s lap as he typed away, writing up an email to send to his publicist.

“Some people have nothing better to do with their lives than stick their nose into other people’s business. People are curious about you.” He tried his best to explain.

“Me? Why am I so interesting?” She asked, tilting her head as she hopped off his lap, walking into the kitchen to grab a bag of her favorite snack, Goldfish.

“We’re eating dinner soon.” Jon reminded, making her nod as she took out a handful. He weighed his thoughts in his hands, wishing he knew exactly how to explain this to Jordyn. “People think… that I’m trying to keep some big secret. You’re not a secret, Jordyn, you’ve never been a secret, you know that, right?” He asked.

“I know.” She nodded.

But in all honesty, the two articles Jon had read had focused more so on the fact that he had turned downright ugly with the photographer at the field. This was evident in the photos and it was not what people would be expecting from him. He wasn’t sure where the anger came from, but as soon as Patrick had pointed him out to Jon, it was like a switch was flipped. Jon didn’t want to keep Jordyn a secret, but he sure as hell wanted to shelter her from all the things people would say and think about her. She didn’t do anything wrong, and didn’t deserve to be in these trashy magazines.

“Fish.” She smiled, holding up a lone cheese cracker. Jon grinned before opening his mouth where she could pop the tiny thing on his tongue.

No, Jordyn didn’t deserve this at all.

Another hour had passed and after conferencing with Quenneville, Gary, Jon’s agent and publicist, and Terry Goldblum, they had come to a concensus that Jon would make a statement regarding Jordyn and his parental rights.

“I shouldn’t have to, but I’m going to.” Jon explained to Patrick as they sat in the family room that night, Jordyn dead asleep on Jon’s lap as Sara cleaned up from dinner in the kitchen. “I don’t want to leave her, not during all of this.” He sighed, raking his fingers gently through her bangs.

“Well it’s not like you have to, I mean, sure, it’s kind of difficult traveling with team and family, but it’s not like Brou’s wife won’t be there, and probably Abby, too. I can see if Sara –“ Patrick stopped at the sharp look Jon gave him. Jon knew that Sara didn’t start the fire in the hotel a month ago, and he knew that she didn’t intentionally leave Jordyn alone in the room, but he was bitter, and he could be bitter for as long as he pleased.

Glancing at his watch, Jon saw that they had half an hour before they needed to get to the airport. Expertly sliding Jordyn from his lap, he disappeared into her bedroom, grabbing one of the duffels she kept on a shelf in her closet before filling it with a few clothes, her hairbrush and toiletries, her penguin Doug, and a few things that would keep her occupied on the plane. It was close to ten at night and Jon double-checked to see that there was a pair of pajama pants in the bag as well.

Patrick grabbed Jon’s duffel, carrying the two of their bags as Jon carried Jordyn, her blue backpack over his shoulders as well as they made their way down to the car.

“Dad?” Jordyn’s sleepy voice was heard from the backseat. Jordyn only really called Jordyn Dad when she was most vulnerable, tired, sleepy, scared, or upset.

“Hey baby, you hungry?” He asked, knowing that ninety-percent of the time, Jordyn was hungry.

“Where are we going?” She asked, rubbing the sleep from her eyes.

“I thought maybe you’d want to come to Colorado with us, how does that sound?” He asked, reaching back at a red light to place his hand on her knee.

“What about school?” She asked, grabbing an apple juice from the back pocket of passenger seat.

“You’ll only miss two days, we can call and collect your homework. Don’t worry about it.” He insisted as they made their way to the airport. Jordyn shrugged it off, taking a few sips of her drink before letting her head loll back and her eyes grow heavy once again. She rarely stayed up past nine on weeknights and she was exhausted by all accounts.

Joel Quenneville would honestly say he was surprised when he saw his captain pull up with his daughter on his hip as he walked into the private gate.

“I didn’t know Jordyn was coming along.” He commented casually as they sat in chairs by one another, waiting for the plane to open its door.

“Me either.” Jon replied quietly as Jordyn wiggled to get comfortable in his lap.

“Are you sure this is a good idea?” Joel asked, glancing at his watch.

“Either she comes or we both stay back.” Jon retorted, not meaning to be so short with someone he cared about so much.

“Well, sounds like a plan to me.” Joel laughed. Jon smiled gratefully and held Jordyn tightly as they walked down the narrow hall to the plane. And while he knew he’d have to let go eventually, Jon wasn’t ready to leave his little girl home yet.