Fearing Death

“Are you almost done in there?” Jon called from his bedroom, pulling on a pair of jeans, buttoning them up as he waited for a response. A few moments passed and when he got nothing in return, he rapped his knuckles on the bathroom door. “Jordyn? You okay?” He called. Jon wasn’t really sure what her experience with bathing was and he thought they had a pretty good system so far. Jordyn would take baths in his bathroom and every once and a while she would give him a holler to let him know she was alive.

“Yeah, I’m almost done!” She called back, as his heart began to beat again. He could hear her splashing around and soon she was padding back to her bedroom, wrapped up tightly in a fluffy black towel. It didn’t take long for Jordyn’s thin hair to dry and soon she was knocking on his door, dressed in the one pair jeans that actually fit her and a solid blue–shirt, the last clean outfit Sara had bought her last minute before she came home. They were driving out to the IKEA in Bolingbrook to pick out some more age appropriate furniture for Jordyn other than the big, modern statement pieces in he room now.

“JT!” Jon rolled his eyes as Patrick let himself into the apartment along with Sara. Jon could hear Jordyn’s footsteps as she ran to the front door, followed by her giggles. He exited his bedroom, clipping his watch into his wrist and walked into the family room to see Jordyn hanging upside down over the front of Patrick’s shoulder, a wide smile on her face.

“Can we go now?” She asked cutely as Patrick flipped her down to her feet. She wobbled a moment before she could catch her balance, smiling up a Jon. He reached his hand out to her, grabbing his car keys in the other as they all took the elevator down to the garage.

“I’ll race you!” Patrick laughed, taking off as soon as the elevator doors opened, sprinting through the underground complex.

“You cheated!” Jordyn called, running after him. He let up a bit and Jon shook his head as he let her win, opening the door to the back seat for her as Jon and Sara made their way over.

“Raising kids is tough.” Sara sighed, shaking her head, making Jon laugh as she talked about her boyfriend. “So, IKEA then the mall?” She asked as they approached the car.

“That’s the plan.” Jon nodded, enlisting Sara’s help when he realized that he probably wasn’t the best person to consult for buying underwear for a little girl. That, and he just didn’t exactly have the best taste in clothes for himself, much less Jordyn. Usually when they bought things, he just got her whatever she wanted, but she was going to need to wear a lot more than just jeans and t-shirts all the time, especially for events and nice occasions. Besides, Sara was a girl, so that made the situation much easier to look for girly things.

It was about a half an hour drive to IKEA, with little traffic for a Tuesday at ten in the morning, this was also their strategy for avoiding large crowds within the store.

“Oh, can we go to the cafeteria for lunch? Their Swedish meatballs are so good.” Patrick bounced excitedly as they rode the giant escalators up to the showcase level of the floors. His question went unanswered as Jordyn disappeared into all of the displays, making Jon sigh and take after her with long, powerful strides.

“Jordyn!” He called out, turning a corner to see her relaxing on a sofa in a giant family room display. “Hey, can you not run off on me, please?” He asked, reaching out his hand to her. She blushed and nodded sheepishly.

“Sorry, I got excited.” She mumbled, taking his hand and feeling safe as his big, warm paw enclosed around her small, soft hand. They walked until they reached the bed areas, a proper bed being their first concern. They picked out a nice full-size dark mahogany sleigh bed, a bed that made Jordyn feel “kinda like a princess.”

They walked around the store a little longer to pick out a dresser and desk that matched the wood of her bed and Jordyn’s hand squeezed Jon as they reached a small aisle of stuffed animals.

“You want one?” He asked, nodding his head towards the aisle of stuffed frogs, bears, and giraffes. “Go pick one out.” He insisted, knowing that she probably never got to have toys like that before. There were no toys or stuffed animals or dolls in her suitcase when she came home, just her three sweatshirts, her school supplies, and a few art supplies, a box of crayons and a blank sketchbook.

Jordyn appeared from the plush aisle, holding a stuffed penguin that fit perfectly in her arms, a big grin across her face.

“That’s the one?” He asked with a laugh as they met up with Patrick and Sara before heading to the underground section where you picked up the supplies for your furniture and checked out. They ordered the furniture to arrive the next day at one, the best time seeing as they could get Adam and Brent over for some help.

“Maybe we shoulda brought Hjalmy.” Patrick laughed as he attempted to read the names of the furniture they picked out while standing in line to pay. Sara showed Jordyn around the imported foods market as they waited for the guys on the other side of the checkout counters.

“This furniture is cheap.” Jon mused as his total ended up being under fifteen hundred dollars at the register. “I got all of her stuff for a fraction of the cost of my bed.” He pointed out, folding the receipt and placing it in his wallet to show the deliverymen the next day.

“That’s supposed to be the appeal for this place, nice furniture for cheap.” Patrick informed him as the met up with the girls, both of them drinking a milk carton as they walked out, Jordyn’s hands enclosed tightly around the stuffed penguin when Jon handed it over. He watched as she took Patrick’s outstretched hand, walking with her back to the car and he fought a frown that threatened to pull the corners of his mouth down. Sure, Jon was so happy that she got along with his best friend so well seeing as he would be such a big part of her life, but sometimes he felt left out, especially when they talked about their little inside jokes that they refused to let him in on.

But Jon wasn’t jealous, no, he wasn’t jealous.

•••

“So, what am I supposed to do?” Jordyn asked, her hand tucked into Patrick’s as they walked into the shopping mall, both men had opted for hats this time, a few more people there than at IKEA.

“Well we need to get you clothes.” Jon began as he looked at the kiosk that listed all of the store names, and their locations. “I don’t really know where to go.” He whispered to Sara who laughed and pointed out a few places like Limited Too, Old Navy, Abercrombie Kids, and Gap Kids. All four stores sat mostly along the same wing of the mall, one or two stores in between, and she also pointed out a store to get some tennis shoes.

Jon wandered around Abercrombie kids, picking up some articles of clothing and wondering how the hell little kids were supposed to wear tube tops and shorts that didn’t cover nearly enough. Holding up a pair of said shorts, he paused, looking up at the mural on the wall in front of him and scrunched his nose at the giant poster of a fifteen-year-old boy without a shirt on and jeans that were riding way too low on his hips.

“Sara?” He called, walking around the store. “I want to leave!” He added, finally finding her as she stood outside of a changing room. “I don’t think I want her to wear clothes from here.” He stated, furrowing his eyebrows together, making her laugh softly as Jordyn opened her door. Jon didn’t mind the combination of the t-shirt and jeans she wore but as soon as he closed the door to change into something else he began speaking in a hushed whisper again. “All of these shirts are… boob shirts. And they say things like ‘Never have I ever’ on them” He pointed out. “We don’t do boob shirts in my house.” He shook his head.

“Look, we’re not going to buy her any boob shirts.” Sara laughed, “but her hips are so tiny, this is like the only place we’re going to find jeans that fit her.” She finished.

“They have little girl thongs out there.” He pointed a finger towards the middle of the store, eyes wide and eyebrows high into his hairline.

“Jon, can you breathe and just trust me for a minute? I’m not trying to turn your girl into a Pussycat Doll, okay?” She finished, giving him a stern look. He nodded, looking around and frowning at his surroundings.

“I think I’m going to wait outside.” He mumbled.

“Hey, why don’t you take Patrick to Sports Authority or something and we’ll call you when we’re done?” She suggested, knowing he would have a much better time there than anywhere else. Jon nodded, taking out his wallet and handing her his card.

“Keep it under five.” He instructed, to which Sara scoffed.

“I’ll try to manage.” She laughed at the ridiculous amount of money he was suggesting they could spend on clothes.

Half an hour later when Jordyn and Sara exited the store, they had three bags with several pairs of jeans, a few pairs of shorts and zero skirts. All of the ones stocked were rather short and Sara didn’t want to get in trouble with Jon. There were a few nice tops there that Jordyn could wear for nice occasions. They stopped at a few other stores, picking out some tops, tees and sweatshirts along with sweatpants and she even got Jordyn to like a dress she could wear for events with Jon.

They got a surprising amount of clothing, an all-new wardrobe, which is just what she needed. When she had picked out a new pair of Nikes, Sara text Patrick to let them know they were coming to get them at SA and they needed help carrying bags when they got there.

“Can we be done now?” Jordyn asked as they left the shoe store with a new pair of tennis shoes and a nice pair of flats that were white, so they would go with a lot of her new, nicer outfits. “We’re going to eventually come and get you some more shoes, stuff for the winter, but we’re done for today.” She smiled as they made their way towards Sports Authority.

“Jon.” Jordyn smiled as she spotted him right away, he and Pat were both talking and laughing with one of the employees, a dark blue hockey stick in hand.

“Hey babe.” He smiled as she immediately tucked herself under his arm. “Set your bags down.” He insisted, “those look heavy.” Jordyn nodded, setting them down and leaning into his side as he wrapped his arm around her shoulders, rubbing up and down her arm seeing as her skin was a little cold in the high air conditioning in the mall.

“This must be Jordyn.” The employee smiled down at the girl.

“Yep, this is she.” Jon smiled proudly; obviously, he had been talking about her to the man before they arrived.

“Well let’s see if we can’t get her fitted!” He smiled, “why don’t you follow me back and we’ll hook you up with some skates.” He finished. Jordyn just seemed to nod and smile her way through the process as Jon and Patrick scoped out several pairs of hockey skates, arguing for a moment, and then agreeing upon a pair for the salesman to fit her with. Twenty minutes later, they were leaving the store with a new pair of skates. Jordyn squeezed Jon’s hand as they walked out back to his car, Patrick being the mule as he carried a majority of the bags.

“I don’t know how to use those.” She pointed to the box in the bag that he was carrying. “I don’t know how to ice skate.” She finished.

“You’ll learn.” Jon smiled, giving her a little wink as he opened the car door for her. “God I’m tired.” He laughed, getting into the driver’s seat. The ride back to the apartment seemed longer than usual and when Jon glanced in the rearview mirror to see Jordyn dead asleep, leaning against Patrick who also looked like he as due for a nap. They had been running around town for more than four hours, and even though he needed to stop to get some groceries for dinner that night, he decided to drop everyone off at the building first.

“Could you take her up and put her to bed?” Jon asked of Patrick who nodded, hoisting her up onto his hip as her arms instinctively went around his neck. Jon didn’t see anything wrong with his decision until he got home after a quick trip to the grocery store.

“Where were you?” Jordyn asked right away, making Jon jump as he sat down the two bags on the kitchen counter. Jon looked down to see her big blue eyes full of unshed tears and worry as she wrapped her arms around herself.

“Hey, hey, what’s the matter?” He asked, right away, picking her up to set her on a barstool at the center island.

“I woke up and you were gone.” She croaked out, her voice cracking as she struggled to hold back tears. “I didn’t know where you were.”

“I just went to the store to get some groceries, babe, everything’s alright.” He continuously brushed her wispy blonde hairs back from her face. “You were asleep, I didn’t think you’d want to go with me.” He offered a weak smile.

“I always want to go with you.” She mumbled out quietly. “I don’t like to be left alone.” She finished quietly.

Jon sighed as he gave her a tight hug, before sending her to the family room to relax and watch TV as he unpacked the groceries, his mind racing. He didn’t know how she was going to handle him going on trips for away games or long nights at the arena. He needed to find a solution, and fast.