Sing Me a Story

I stared up at the gray sky then brought the bottle to my lips before gulping a large amount of alcohol. The harsh liquid ran down my throat causing me to wretch but I held it in. I walked slowly to the apartment, falling down every once and a while, but I didn’t give in. The world around me spun happily while I made my death wish true every day.

My blood shot eyes burned from the lack of sleep, while my lungs ached from breathing in carbon monoxide instead of oxygen. It felt as if I was a walking corpse.

Our legs begin to break
We’ve walked this path for far too long
My lungs, they start to ache
But still we carry on
I’m choking on my words
Like I got a noose around my neck
I can’t believe it’s come to this
And dear, I fear
That this ship is sinking tonight

My feet aimlessly walked towards the entrance of the broken down hotel. Even from outside you could hear what was going on inside. Music blaring out of the stereos of angsty teens. Screams, yells and shouts of arguing and fighting couple or relatives. Now and then, the cries of a baby are heard over all of the above.

As I flung my arms out, I accidentally hit my left arm on the steel bar door. I wince in pain and clutch my arm to my chest. I feel something wet slowly trickle down-the result of picked at self-inflicted scars being opened. But soon my aching arm is forgotten for another drink of the bottle. I slam the door open, revealing empty vodka, JD, and beer bottles all over the floor. No food, no article of clothing, just alcohol and bottles of prescription drugs. Something catches my eye. It’s him-the one who is to blame for what has become of me.

I won’t give up on you
These scars won’t tear us apart
So don’t give up on me
It’s not too late for us
And I’ll save you from yourself
And I’ll save you from yourself

Yet I still love-no that’s not the word-need him. If not for him I would go on relapse and probably even die.

He stood up from the couch, cigarette in one hand, a bottle of JD on the other.

“Did you get them?” He asks his voice dry and husky yet greedy and needy at the same time. I just nod and hand them the bottle of pills that he told me he just needed to have. He rips open the lid of the bottle before swallowing four pills with a swish of his drink then throwing his head down into the couch.

“What are they? Why do you need them? Can I have some?”My voice is just like his, desperate and needy.

He shushes me, his index finger pressing against his chapped lips that are formed into a small grin. “Sure, baby. Just be quiet. And don’t take them all at once. We’ll need some for later…”With that he closes his eyes and sighs.

I sneak in an extra three pills before he takes notice. And with that, I’m gone from this place. From this world filled with depression, hurt, pain, hate and cruelty.

Our legs begin to break
We’ve walked this path for far too long
My lungs begin to ache
But still we carry on
I’m choking on my words
Like I got a noose around my neck
I’m not coming home tonight
I’m not coming home tonight
‘Cause dear I fear, dear I fear
I’m not coming home
I’m not coming home tonight
Cause dear I fear
This ship is sinking
Is there hope for us?
Can we make it out alive?
I can taste the failure on your lips
Is there hope for us?
Can we make it out alive?
I can taste the failure
Close your eyes
There’s nothing we can do
But sleep in this bed that we made for ourselves
You’re trapped in your past
Like its six feet under

Suddenly my eyes flutter open, tremors overtake my numb body. I break out in a sweat as my teeth chatter noisily and painfully. I wrap my arms around my body to both stop my body from shaking and warm myself up. But the uncomfortableness and confusion stays.

“Logan-help!”I cry-choke out. His eyes quickly open and he rushes to my side. His arms wrap around me into a tight embrace.

“What’s wrong?”He demands, his voice is full of worry. His dazed eyes clouded with concern.

“Took-too many-“I managed once again to choke out. ”-pills.”

“No! Why would you do that?! I have to take you to the hospital! Now.” He growls as he tows my body out the door but I stop him.

“No. Leave me here. I’m done with this. I want to die here.”I beg. I shove his arms away from my body so that I can enter the apartment room.

“Brooke! I have to take you. I-“He protested.

“Please.”This time my beg was a small whimper.

Tears formed in his eyes and began to free fall down his face. He strides to me, arms around me, and lips close to my ear. “I won’t let you die without me.”He whispers. And before I can process what he means, he snatches the bottle of the drugs and consumes them. He collapses to the floor. Taking me with him.

I won’t give up on you
These scars won’t tear us apart
So don’t give up on me
It’s not too late for us
I’ll save you from yourself
I’ll save you from yourself
I’ll save you from yourself
I’ll save you from yourself.
Try to numb the pain
With alcohol and pills
But it won’t repair your trust
You can’t stand on two fucking feet
With a substance as a crutch

We both lay on the floor. In a tight embrace, having each other as a life supporter as we wait for the dark end engulfs us at last. His sweet voice sings into my ear:

I won’t give up
I won’t give up on you
We’ll sing this symphony
I won’t give up
I won’t give up on you
We’ll sing this symphony of sympathy
I won’t give up
I won’t give up on you
We’ll sing this symphony
I won’t give up
I won’t give up on you

We’ll sing this symphony of sympathy

And with that last line, I’m gone…