Take My Hand

“Who is it?” Rian asked when I stayed in the same position for probably more than half a minute.

“Oh, it’s no one,” I told him as I finished the rest of my pancakes and brought the phone into my bunk and right beside Jack who was still sleeping.

I had mixed emotions about what occurred and I didn’t really know which feeling I should dwell on more. Was I supposed to angry? Was I supposed to be worried? Was I supposed to ask him about this? I didn’t know what to do. Maybe the guys would know but if I did start that conversation with them, it would only turn awkward.

So here’s what I did. After I placed Jack’s phone beside him, I grabbed some clothes from the bus and took a quick shower. I spent at least ten minutes in the bathroom before I came out all fresh and clean – ready to get this day over with.

The guys didn’t seem worried about me or anything like that. They probably thought that it was my phone since Jack and I had the same model. I’m not sure that them not worrying was a good thing or a bad thing but maybe it is a good thing because I wouldn’t have to add another problem on this tour so I guess maybe it was best to shrug it off.

Just when I got out of the bathroom, Jack got up from the bunk and showed me a fake smile. He probably read the text already. I stepped away from the bathroom so he could use it.

I was actually going to get out and talk to some other people about this when suddenly the bus started moving and we were on the road. Maybe I could text Gabe or something. He’ll know what to do, right?

Oh, who am I kidding? This is my problem so I might as well face it as soon as Jack comes out of the bathroom. I stepped aside to head into the living room as I waited for Jack to come out. The guys were playing COD: Modern Warfare again and I was wondering if they’ll get sick of it eventually from playing it too much but they are boys so I guess that’s impossible.

Alex was off to the kitchen. He was fixing himself up a peanut butter sandwich. I can’t believe he was still hungry after everything he had for breakfast.

I walked over to the kitchen and grabbed a water bottle from the fridge. I felt eyes on my back so I turned and saw Alex staring at me. I raised an eyebrow at him but he shook his head telling me that there was nothing he wanted to say.

I didn’t know why I wanted to ask him about Kristy but I found myself doing so. I mean he was after Jack’s happiness too, right? So maybe he has some answers.

“Alex,” I whispered not wanting the rest of the guys to hear. The game was really loud so I doubt they can hear our whispered conversation.

“Yes?” he asked in a normal manner clearly not catching on to the whispering part. I sighed and rolled my eyes as he took a bite from his sandwich. I can’t believe a sandwich can preoccupy his senses like this.

“How would you feel if you had a girlfriend and she still kept in touch with her ex?” I asked him as I sat on the table counter.

He stopped and stared at me trying to figure out why I was asking him but that didn’t take him long. A mixture of shock and surprise was evident on his face so I couldn’t really tell if knew about this already or if he just found out from me.

“Um, I’d worry about it, that’s for sure,” he said innocently as he took another bite of his sandwich.

Before I could say anything more, Jack emerged from the bathroom and Alex walked into the hallway. I got off the table counter as I heard both of them talking in harsh whispers. When they saw me standing before them, Alex took Jack to the front of the bus and asked me for some privacy. I was going to slap him across the face for him asking me rudely but they went before I could even do anything.

I rolled my eyes and sighed as I joined Zack and Rian. They were now watching a movie. I didn’t know what it was so I just sat next to Zack on the couch while Rian remained on the floor. I wonder why he didn’t sit beside Jack.

“Is everything alright?”Zack asked me noticing the frown I had on my face. I really liked the fact that he noticed the little things. It made me feel sorta loved in a friendly manner. Like knowing that your friends actually do care for you and stuff like that.

“Yeah,” I said with a half-hearted sigh.

This time Rian turned to face me and tried to break me down with his stare. I didn’t want to have to explain everything but Alex and Jack were still having those mini-conference things and who knows how long those could last?

“Do you guys know if Jack still keeps in touch with Kristy or whatever her name was?” I asked and both their eyes popped.

“Why?” Rian was the first to regain composure. Zack just stayed frozen and I swear I would’ve laughed if I wasn’t in such a sullen mood.

“I don’t know, I mean she texted him this morning and I’m not sure if I should worry about it or not,” I told him and Zack shook his head.

“What did she say?” Zack asked putting his arm around me as he pulled me into a side hug.

“She told Jack that she misses him and that she’s coming on tour.” That’s when they both stopped dead and thought about something.

“Shit, we’re going to Seattle next, right?” Rian said in terror as Zack hesitantly nodded.

The way the seemed so shocked made me want to laugh my guts out but my mind wouldn’t just let me shrug this all off with laughter. It wouldn’t be right.

“We sure are,” an aggravated Alex chimed in.

I turned back and saw them make their way into the living room. Jack had his head down and he stopped at the door way just looking at the floor. I got up and walked my way to him. I grabbed one of his hands and put them in my own. My eyebrows creased on my forehead as his eyes turned teary.

“Jack?” I whispered not really caring about the other guys who were probably staring at us right now instead of the movie.

“Brit, I’m really sorry,” he whispered back sounding ashamed.

“What do you mean?” I queried feeling really confused at this point.

“I didn’t know it would go this far,” he told me and the worried crease in my forehead soon turned into an angry scowl.

“What?” I asked wanting to clarify everything. He was talking vaguely and it was hard for me to understand.

“Brit, don’t ask him about this right now. I’m sure he has a lot to think about,” Alex said grabbing my arm and taking me away.

Jack walked back to the bunk area and I didn’t want him to leave me with all these questions in my head but I knew that he wouldn’t really be able to answer me. Well in all honesty, that wasn’t really the case.

I didn’t want him to answer me because I knew that the answers would mean the death of our relationship and I didn’t want it to end, not yet at least.