The Slut Survival Guide
thirteen.
Secret #14: There's really no need to care for the guy's feelings. Just fuck and leave.
As I sat on the bus to school with my headphones in, I thought about how relieved I was that this slut thing was over. School was ending soon and although it was fun, I simply was not cut out for it. I got rid of my virginity, but in a good way. I ended up with a fantastic boyfriend. I smiled to myself as Oliver's face showed up in my mind.
Cathy and Valerie were waiting for me at our usual morning spot, the lockers by the South Entrance stairs. I sat down next to them and Valerie handed me a cup of hot Starbucks coffee. "To celebrate," she said.
"Celebrate what?" I asked.
"You, silly!" Cathy said, raising her own cup to toast. "A toast!"
"Yes, a toast!" Valerie giggled. "To Tanya! Who braved the world of a slut and came out on top!" She paused and smiled slyly. "Literally," she added, giggling at her own innuendo.
I laughed and raised my coffee to toast with them.
"Tanya! Wait!" Tim's voice echoed through the cafeteria at lunchtime. I turned my head and saw him running towards me. "Tanya," he said. "Will you have lunch with me? There's something we need to talk about."
I couldn't imagine what it was. Maybe Oliver had told him we had sex. But why would he do that? And why would Tim be upset? I shrugged. "Okay, I guess. Where are we going?"
"To my car," he said, pulling out his keys. "I'm taking you to Chipotle. We'll be back in time, don't worry," he added, seeing my worried expression.
I looked at Valerie and Cathy and shrugged. Sorry, I mouthed. They looked confused but I ignored it and followed Tim out to his silver Lexus SUV. We got in and he started driving.
He turned up the radio, ignoring me in the passenger seat. After about five minutes of this uncomfortable scenario, I asked, "So, what is this about?"
"You'll see," Tim answered curtly, turning into Chipotle's parking lot.
We went inside and I ordered a burrito. Tim did too and we found a table in the back. I began eating but he didn't.
"What is it?" I asked, again.
He cleared his throat. "So, I was at Cathy's yesterday."
I continued eating, unaware of where this was going.
"I found the most interesting book! Really, a great read. You should read it."
My heart stopped right before he pulled it out of his backpack. It was a black leather journal with no writing on the cover page. Otherwise known as, The Slut Survival Guide.
My mouth fell open, but I quickly snapped it shut. "What is that?" I asked, pretending to be nonchalant.
He opened the book to the title page that had our lipstick kiss marks. "I don't know. I was hoping you could tell me. It's called the Slut Survival Guide. And under this kiss mark, isn't that your name? And isn't that Valerie's? And isn't that Cathy's?" His face looked more smug than it ever had before.
I bit my tongue until I could taste blood. I had no idea what to say, so I took another bite of my burrito.
"Alright, don't respond. But just so you know, everyone is going to see it," he said frankly, standing up and putting the book back into his backpack."And I mean everyone." He threw it over his shoulder and grabbed his drink and unfinished burrito.
"Wait, did she give it to you?" I asked, my voice shaking.
"No," he said. "She went to the bathroom and I took it." He paused, smirking. "Cruel of me, really, but I don't care. Oh, by the way, you can walk back," he added. "That's what you get for being a slut and fucking with everyone. It's one thing to just hook up but to keep like, tally and make a game out of us?" He looked really angry so I avoided his gave by looking down at my feet. "That's disgusting. Just because we don't want a relationship doesn't mean we're bad people. We can't be played with like that, Tanya. Guys aren't just names you add to some resume or some scoreboard."
"Oh, like you're so innocent," I snapped, regaining my courage.
His face fell, and he averted his gaze to the floor. "I'm not, but I've never taken it this far. And...honestly, I actually liked you," he mumbled. "It was pretty shitty to hear about you fucking my best friend, and then to find out about this." He paused and then said, "Oliver's not going to like this."
"But Oliver's not part of this!" I called after him as he walked out the door. I grabbed my unfinished burrito and chased him out to his car.
"This has nothing to do with Oliver!" I tried again, and this time he heard me. He shook his head, getting in the car and driving away.
I stood there for two more minutes, and then I checked the time. There was no way I could make it back to school in time even if I started walking now. I found a shady tree in front, leaned against it, and began to cry.
As I sat on the bus to school with my headphones in, I thought about how relieved I was that this slut thing was over. School was ending soon and although it was fun, I simply was not cut out for it. I got rid of my virginity, but in a good way. I ended up with a fantastic boyfriend. I smiled to myself as Oliver's face showed up in my mind.
Cathy and Valerie were waiting for me at our usual morning spot, the lockers by the South Entrance stairs. I sat down next to them and Valerie handed me a cup of hot Starbucks coffee. "To celebrate," she said.
"Celebrate what?" I asked.
"You, silly!" Cathy said, raising her own cup to toast. "A toast!"
"Yes, a toast!" Valerie giggled. "To Tanya! Who braved the world of a slut and came out on top!" She paused and smiled slyly. "Literally," she added, giggling at her own innuendo.
I laughed and raised my coffee to toast with them.
"Tanya! Wait!" Tim's voice echoed through the cafeteria at lunchtime. I turned my head and saw him running towards me. "Tanya," he said. "Will you have lunch with me? There's something we need to talk about."
I couldn't imagine what it was. Maybe Oliver had told him we had sex. But why would he do that? And why would Tim be upset? I shrugged. "Okay, I guess. Where are we going?"
"To my car," he said, pulling out his keys. "I'm taking you to Chipotle. We'll be back in time, don't worry," he added, seeing my worried expression.
I looked at Valerie and Cathy and shrugged. Sorry, I mouthed. They looked confused but I ignored it and followed Tim out to his silver Lexus SUV. We got in and he started driving.
He turned up the radio, ignoring me in the passenger seat. After about five minutes of this uncomfortable scenario, I asked, "So, what is this about?"
"You'll see," Tim answered curtly, turning into Chipotle's parking lot.
We went inside and I ordered a burrito. Tim did too and we found a table in the back. I began eating but he didn't.
"What is it?" I asked, again.
He cleared his throat. "So, I was at Cathy's yesterday."
I continued eating, unaware of where this was going.
"I found the most interesting book! Really, a great read. You should read it."
My heart stopped right before he pulled it out of his backpack. It was a black leather journal with no writing on the cover page. Otherwise known as, The Slut Survival Guide.
My mouth fell open, but I quickly snapped it shut. "What is that?" I asked, pretending to be nonchalant.
He opened the book to the title page that had our lipstick kiss marks. "I don't know. I was hoping you could tell me. It's called the Slut Survival Guide. And under this kiss mark, isn't that your name? And isn't that Valerie's? And isn't that Cathy's?" His face looked more smug than it ever had before.
I bit my tongue until I could taste blood. I had no idea what to say, so I took another bite of my burrito.
"Alright, don't respond. But just so you know, everyone is going to see it," he said frankly, standing up and putting the book back into his backpack."And I mean everyone." He threw it over his shoulder and grabbed his drink and unfinished burrito.
"Wait, did she give it to you?" I asked, my voice shaking.
"No," he said. "She went to the bathroom and I took it." He paused, smirking. "Cruel of me, really, but I don't care. Oh, by the way, you can walk back," he added. "That's what you get for being a slut and fucking with everyone. It's one thing to just hook up but to keep like, tally and make a game out of us?" He looked really angry so I avoided his gave by looking down at my feet. "That's disgusting. Just because we don't want a relationship doesn't mean we're bad people. We can't be played with like that, Tanya. Guys aren't just names you add to some resume or some scoreboard."
"Oh, like you're so innocent," I snapped, regaining my courage.
His face fell, and he averted his gaze to the floor. "I'm not, but I've never taken it this far. And...honestly, I actually liked you," he mumbled. "It was pretty shitty to hear about you fucking my best friend, and then to find out about this." He paused and then said, "Oliver's not going to like this."
"But Oliver's not part of this!" I called after him as he walked out the door. I grabbed my unfinished burrito and chased him out to his car.
"This has nothing to do with Oliver!" I tried again, and this time he heard me. He shook his head, getting in the car and driving away.
I stood there for two more minutes, and then I checked the time. There was no way I could make it back to school in time even if I started walking now. I found a shady tree in front, leaned against it, and began to cry.