The Slut Survival Guide

So you've done it. You've become a grade-A slut. I'm very proud, Tanya. But remember: There's a time and a place for being a whore. Lotsa Love, Cath and Val.

I adjusted my graduation hat on my head. The dark green tassel kept falling in my face and tickling my nose. I made a face as it attacked my features again and heard Cathy's soft laughter next to me.

"Stop that, you look ridiculous," she said. "Plus, you never know who's taking pictures right about now." She looked around at the three professional photographers we had flitting around our auditorium.

I threw the tassel back once more and looked around. "I never realized how huge our class was."

Valerie nodded on the other side of Cathy. "I don't even know half these people!" she giggled.

We looked up at the stage where our principal was supposed to take the stage. He had been standing by the microphone for about five minutes but had yet to dim the lights or begin talking or whatever it is that you do at a high school graduation. My fingers impatiently played with the notecard on which I had written my Valedictorian speech.

Cathy noticed my nerves and grabbed my hand, giving it a long squeeze. "You'll be fine, babe," she said. "Just say what's in your heart."

"I mean, I have my speech right here," I said. "I know what I'm going to say. It's not that."

"Then what is it?" She asked, leaning in.

"I don't want to see Oliver," I said.

"You two still haven't talked?" Valerie injected.

I shook my head, the tassel attacking my face yet again. "Nope. Not since that one time."

"What a dick," she said.

I was about to respond but the lights were finally dimmed, and Principal Williams began speaking. He tapped on the mic a few times and leaned into it.

"Class of 2011," he began. There were a few 'whoops' from the crowd and then some laughter before he continued. "You've come a long way. This class had outstanding kids in it. Each and every one of you are off to a great future, whether or not that includes college. I believe that you all have it in you to succeed with whatever you want to do." He smiled at us and then found my face in the crowd. "But don't let me preach for hours. Here's your class Valedictorian, Miss Tanya O'Connell."

I inhaled sharply and made my way to the stage, fumbling with my notecards. The podium looked terrifying and the friendly faces of my peers all of a sudden looked just as ominous. I took a deep breath and looked out into the audience before beginning.

"When we were kids, we all had dreams. There was this period of time around when we were five years old where we thought we could literally do anything. If we were to jump off the garage roof, we would fly. If we were to put on a pair of pointe shoes, we would be ballerinas. If we were to sing a few bars of the latest Britney Spears song in public, someone would hear us and fall in love with our talent."

I looked out into the audience and saw Oliver. He was looking at me with a very blank expression on his face. I refocused my gaze onto Cathy, who was smiling warmly at me. Valerie had a similar grin on her face. I looked down at my notecards and scanned through what I had written quickly. I folded it up and looked out into the crowd, prepared to wing my entire Valedictorian speech. I had things to say that just couldn't be summed up by quotes and cliches.

"Thing is, it doesn't work like that," I said. "We won't be Britney just by singing her song, or Christiano Ronaldo just by kicking a soccer ball. And if there is anything I've learned this year, it's that people won't always know who you are inside. You have to show them. You have to get out there and make a name for yourself. You have to realize what you want and how to get it. You need a plan, a goal..." I paused and looked back at Cathy and Valerie, smiling. "Or a guide."

They grinned widely, and Valerie burst out into a few quick laughs.

I composed myself and continued. "No one is going to hold your hand through the world. You hold your own hand. You do what you want to do. If you get a bad reputation, there's no one to blame but yourself. Class of 2011, as we all head out to college, or the army, or a gap year, or whatever, we have to realize that this is our chance to start over. This is our chance to become who we want to be. To shed those stereotypes of who we were in high school. Were you a prep? Be a nerd. Were you a jock? Join the drama club. Were you into physics and Star Trek? Go to a party and meet a girl. She just might be into that, too. Even if you were a slut , this is the time for change."

Principal Williams frowned at the word 'slut', but I kept going.

"If you hurt people along the way, swallow your pride and apologize. You're going to need a few close friends to keep you sane. But remember: You can be whoever you want to be. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise and don't let anyone bring you down. Congratulations Class of 2011. Let's show the world what the fuck we're about!"

The crowd erupted into whoops and hollers, and Principal Williams walked back onto the stage to give us our diplomas.

I took my seat next to Cathy. Her and Valerie were both grinning at me as I sat down. "Amazing speech," Cathy said.

"Agreed," said Valerie.

I smiled at them. "Thanks."

"Rebecca Adler," Principal Williams called out, beginning to hand out the diplomas.

We sat in our seats as Cathy was called, then me, and then Valerie. We clutched onto our diplomas as familiar faces walked onto the stage to graduate.

Tim's copper hair was visible under his cap as he smiled at the photographer who was taking his picture.

Oliver smiled wider than he ever had before as he held up his diploma to the photographer. I smiled to myself quietly.

He turned around and caught my eye. He smiled weakly at me and nodded. I smiled back.

"Was that Oliver smiling at you?" Valerie asked.

I nodded. "But he's not going to talk to me."

"How do you know?" She demanded.

I shrugged. "He's probably with his family now."

"I'm not," he said, in a typical Oliver fashion, from behind me.

I jumped, startled. My tassle attacked my face, and I moved it away again. "Oliver," I said. I looked back over at Valerie but she had disappeared into the crowd.

"Great speech," he said.

"Thanks."

There was a silence as I averted my gaze from his eyes to the floor. "So...," I said.

He placed a hand under my chin and tilted my face back up. "I love you," he said, and kissed me.

We kissed right there, in the middle of the auditorium, for about thirty seconds before we heard a camera click. A photographer had taken our picture. We chuckled and then I looked back up at him.

"Why now?" I asked.

"Because you're not a slut," he said. "You're Tanya. And you were wrong, but so was I."

I grinned and hugged him, my cheek pressing up against his neck. "So what do we do now?" I asked.

He kissed my forehead and smiled. "We get ready for the rest of our lives. It's graduation!" He exclaimed, throwing his hat up in the air.

I giggled and took his hand in mine. He led me out of the auditorium and kissed me on the cheek again. "But Oliver," I said as we walked out onto the field. "I don't even know where you're going to college!"

He shook his head and stopped walking. "I'm going to the University of Michigan Ann Arbor," he said.

My face fell. "That's far."

"It is," he said. "But it doesn't matter. Let's just enjoy the time we have left."

I felt myself beginning to cry, and he pulled me into a hug. "I'll always be there for you, even if we're not together," he whispered into my ear.

"Promise?" I asked, blinking up at him.

"I promise," he said. "Your friends are staring at us," he said, chuckling.

I turned around and saw Cathy and Valerie standing by a tree, taking pictures of us with Cathy's camera. They grinned when I caught their eye. I looked back at Oliver and gave him one more kiss. "Call me, okay?" I said.

"I will," he said. "Run along."

I grinned at him, and sprinted over to Cathy and Valerie. "We're done!" I yelled.

I enveloped them in a huge hug as cried for no reason. Everyone was running around, taking pictures, and smiling. There wasn't a face in the audience that had a frown on it.

I saw Tim talking to Oliver and gave him a wave. He waved back meekly.

"Did you just wave at Tim?" Cathy hissed.

"Yeah," I said. "It's okay. Might as well make amends."

She shrugged, and we walked over to where Tim and Oliver were standing. I walked back into Oliver's arms and for once, I didn't think about the future. I didn't think about what had happened. It was all over, and the only thing that mattered now was now . I turned to the photographer and smiled for a picture, a lasting memory from my high school graduation.