The Way I Loved You

Jack walked outside and looked towards where Alex and I were standing.

"Hey, Brynn. Sorry you had to see me and Holly in there."

"Wait, that was Holly?" He nodded. "When did she get here?"

"This morning," he said.

I started to walk away when Alex grabbed my hand and pulled me towards a bench.

"Let's sit and talk," he suggested. I nodded and took a seat.

"So, the party is back at our bus tonight," he said, trying to strike up a conversation.

"Why?"

"Well, it's the first party of tour and we happen to throw the best parties."

I smiled and sat there thinking.

"What are you thinking about?" he asked.

"I love you," I said.

"I love you, too."

Before I could respond, his lips crashed onto mine and he started to push me backwards until I hit a wall. We pulled away a few minutes later.

"Why do you always feel the need to push me up against a wall?" I asked.

"Because I don't want you to leave me," he said, glancing sideways.

"I won't leave you," I said, before pecking his lips again.

How wrong I was.

~*~

We walked back onto the bus and noticed that the other bands had started to come over. I saw Melanie come in soon after, smiling slyly, and headed towards the drinks. Alex grabbed my hand and squeezed it tight.

"Are you okay?" I whispered in his ear.

"Yeah, I just have a bad feeling," he said. I nodded in agreement and laid my head on his shoulder.

We sat around and talked to everyone for a little while.

"I'm going to go back and sleep," I said to Alex.

"Alright, I'll be back shortly."

I smiled and nodded before standing up and pecking his lips. After changing into comfy clothes, I climbed into the bunk and soon enough feel asleep.

I woke up about three hours later and Alex still wasn't in the bunk. I looked around and noticed that most everyone was in there bunks. I slowly got up and threw on one of Alex's hoodies and slipped on some shoes. No one was sitting in the living room area so I walked outside to see if I could find Alex. After walking around for about fifteen minutes, and about to give up, I found him. Sitting on the bench we were at earlier. With Melanie. She was kissing his neck and he didn't seem to mind too much.

"How could you?" I said, tears welling up in my eyes.

"Brynn, it's not what it looks like," he said, pushing Melanie up and pulling on my hand.

"Get your hands off me you sick bastard!" I screamed before taking off back onto the bus.

I faintly heard him yelling at her in the background as I climbed onto the bus. I grabbed my pillow and blanket before walking to the back of the bus and closing the door. It was the only door that locked on the bus. I made my bed on the couch and turned on the tv. I hadn't even noticed I had been crying until I looked down and saw the tear drops on my pillow.

I soon heard the front door of the bus open and heavy foot steps running down the hall towards where I was.

"Just let me explain," he said through the door.

"No. We're done. I don't even want to hear your voice right now," I said, trying to control my sobs.

He kept trying to talk to me but I soon just tuned him out and watched the crappy chick flick that was playing. By now, everyone was up on the bus and trying to get an explanation out of him. I soon heard a lot of movement and some groaning. I threw open the door and saw Jack punching Alex, who wasn't even trying to defend himself.

"Jack, stop," I said, pulling Jack off of him.

"He deserves it," Jack said.

"I know, but I'm not going to let my brother and his best friend fight. He's scum. He's not even worth it," I said, walking into the back of the bus where no one even tried to bother me for the rest of the night.

I just sat there, not sleeping, not talking. I cried a lot and ignored my phone as I got call and text after text. I finally just shut it off. I had had enough of this shit and I'm done pretending that I'm strong enough to make it through everything. I had finally been broken, and there was no fixing me now.