This Loneliness Is Killing Me

Shaun decided that he was going to come along with me to Silverton and to stick with the initial plan.

I was thankful that he had decided to come along; I really had no idea what I’d do all by myself in an empty house for six more months.

At this point I was a little over 2 months pregnant and although most wouldn’t be showing by now, I was starting to. It was tiny though, barely noticeable, it was only really noticeable if you looked hard enough for it and knew I was pregnant.

Luckily at this point a lot of the hype surrounding Shaun and I had died down so we easily made it to and from the airport without being bombarded by the paparazzi, only stopping every now and then to take pictures with some fans.

Shaun and I couldn’t have chosen a better time to leave though because the doctor had said that in about a month or two’s time I was going to be showing a lot more and it was going to be noticeable. I think after we heard that it was pretty unanimous that we were leaving tomorrow morning no matter what.

Shaun was definitely more than excited during the ultrasound appointment. He couldn’t stop smiling the whole time, not that you could ever catch him not smiling anyway. But this time it was different, he was ecstatic and seeing everything on the little screen just made him even more giddy and excited.

I think him finally being able to be there for me, and seeing what was going on finally caused everything to sink in. He finally understood that he was going to be a dad, that he was going to have two kids, with me, and that just caused everything to click in his head. The second we left the hospital he never left my side, not in the clingy kind of way, but in the way he used to be, we used to be. Everything was basically almost back to normal, minus our now non-existent marital status.

He started treating me the same way he used to before Ashley came back into our lives and before I got pregnant, even his constant need to get laid was set back into motion. He claimed he ‘wanted to get rid of his intense sex drive before it would get awkward for us to have sex and before the kids would be born’.

I told him that was never going to happen and knowing him he’d make us have sex the second the kids would fall asleep. He agreed and said he couldn’t wait.

“You’re a sex crazed maniac, you know that?” I laughed, as we lay sprawled across the intense reclining couch in front of the fireplace in our pajamas.

The had been a snowstorm last night leaving us snowed in, we didn’t mind though, we were chilling like old times, and it was very apparent that we both missed this.

“You love me anyway though.” He smiled widely before kissing me softly.

I rested my head on his chest and started tracing circles on his stomach as his hand snaked itself around my waist before he rested his hand on my stomach.

“Do you know when we find out what kind of twins they are and the gender?” He asked quietly.

“Not too sure, soon I’m assuming, I’ll Google it.” I laughed.

Shaun laughed lightly, “It’s strange, you know, knowing you have two humans growing inside of you. What if they’re both boys? What’ll we name ‘em?”

I shrugged lightly, “I don’t know, the two boy names that we did like?” I questioned.

“I’m not liking the name I chose before.” He replied truthfully.

“Good, ‘cause I’m not too ecstatic for the name Aiden anymore either.” I laughed.

“Can we name one, or both, after someone famous?”

“We’re not naming any of them Jimmy or Robert, I’m sorry, but those are the worst names ever. What if they end up with your hair color? Those two names are, like, some of the worst typical ginger names.”

I felt Shaun’s chest rise as he sighed heavily, “Fine, how about, John?”

“I’m not too wild about that name dude.” I stated truthfully.

“Alright…”

“How about Morrison? It’s not too bad and it’s the only name coming to mind currently.”

“We can use that if we can’t think of any better names.”

“If we have a girl, we have to name her Page, without the I. Like, as in Jimmy Page.”

“Yes, I like that, a lot. There, that was simple, now we have a chicks name.”

“But we’re looking for guy’s names.” I laughed.

“I know, but it’s so difficult.” He whined.

“You’ve got 7 months, chill.” I laughed before lying on my stomach as I could look up at him.

“Fine, we’ll brainstorm some other time.” He smiled before kissing me lightly.

“Yes, we shall. I don’t even think the babies are even considered fetus’ yet.” I laughed.

“Dude, no need to get all technical on me, alright? I was just thinking of some possible names.” He smiled.

“Well, keep thinking about them and then get back to me when we’ve hit the six month mark.”

“Fine, I will.” He smiled triumphantly.

I rolled my eyes and continued to stare at him before he smiled at me, a familiar glimmer in his eyes instantly telling me what he wanted.

“No Shaun.” I said simply.

“Please?” He pouted.

“No.”

“It’s been so long though!” He retorted.

“We had sex two days ago.” I replied flatly.

“Ya, that’s a long time,” He slightly smirked as he put his hands up the back of my shirt.

“Shaun.” I warned, smiling slightly, which clearly made me come off as not serious whatsoever, even though I really wasn’t, and he knew that.

“You know you can’t resist me baby.” He smirked as he sat up and sat me down on his lap.

“You know me too well, White.” I smiled as I positioned myself so I was straddling him.

“Well clearly, because you’re obviously trying to seduce me.” He laughed.

“You can obviously read me like a book.” I replied before I kissed him, Shaun turning it into a full out heated make out session.

We had sex that day, twice, both times on the floor.