This Loneliness Is Killing Me

Shaun hadn’t really been talking to me in the past two days since I told him why I didn’t want to marry him right now. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t expecting him to seize all forms of communication with me and it upset me slightly because he was dealing with it so childishly.

He didn’t even sleep in the same room as I; he slept in the guest room. He wouldn’t even spend the day with me or have dinner with me. He went out snowboarding all day and wouldn’t come back home ‘til really late at night when he knew I was going off to bed so he could continue to avoid me.

I was currently fixing up some lunch, seeing as I was eating for three, I was always a lot hungrier than an average human being.

I felt my phone go off in my pocket as I finished preparing my food and quickly dug it out from the bottom of my pocket to see I had received a text from Shaun and from Alex.

I decided to read Alex’s text before I read Shaun’s unexpected text message.

‘I HAVE AMAZING NEWS FOR YOU!! CALL ME ASAP!!’ is what Alex had screamed at me via text message.

I smiled lightly before hitting the call button. I put my phone on speaker as I carried my plate over into the living room where I had some show on MTV playing softly as background noise.

“It’s about fucking time you called!” Alex teased.

“Sorry, I just woke up you tool. So what amazing news do you have for yours truly?”

“Never mind, you probably don’t want to know.” She joked.

“Dude, you have to tell me. You can’t just scream on the phone all excited like that and not tell me what’s up.” I laughed.

“Alright, I’ll tell you.”

“You better.” I joked as I began to eat my hastily prepared lunch.

“Ok, I’ll just blurt it out even though Mason doesn’t want me to, but… he broke up with her.” She said quickly, clearly saying it with a smile on her face.

I nearly choked on my food and dropped my fork in shock when I heard her say this, “Mason broke up with Ashley?” I asked; just to make sure I heard everything clearly.

“No, Scotty broke up with his make believe girlfriend.” She replied sarcastically.

“Shut up, when did this happen? Why? Explain.” I demanded more than I asked.

“It happened, like, last night. I was going to call you but it was super late when I found out, but he essentially dumped her because he actually pieced things together and finely saw that she was only using him to get to Shaun again, that and Ashley left her email open and he sorta grazed through one email she was having with one of her friends about Shaun and stuff, so he dumped her ass asap.” She replied with a light laugh at the end.

“Is he ok?” I asked.

“Um ya, he was super upset about it though. Mainly blaming Shaun about how he always gets everything, then I reminded him about the whole, non-engagement thing and that Ashley using him wasn’t Shaun’s fault and so on and so forth. He’s ok now though, he’s hitting the clubs right now with Scotty.” She laughed.

“Well that’s good.”

“I know, right? But, how are you two?”

I shrugged, even though I knew she couldn’t see me, “He hasn’t talked to me in a while, but I got a text message from him, that I have yet to read, so maybe everything will be all right, but I intend to fix things tonight anyway.” I confessed.

“Do you know how?” She asked, clearly smiling.

“Not yet, but I’ll figure it out. I’ll just wing it actually.” I laughed.

“Dude, you can’t just wing it.”

“I’ve been snowboarding my whole life dude, all of my runs were just me winging it; I’ll be fine. I’ve winged it through absolutely everything.”

“Alright, but I’ll let you go. You’re on your cell and this is going to cost you a shit load, not that you’re fucking loaded or anything, but I’m not, so good day madam, I shall speak to you another time.” She laughed, causing me to laugh also.

“Alright, bye.” I replied before hanging up and eagerly opening the text Shaun had sent me.

I opened it cautiously, almost as if I had received one of those shouting letters that Ron received in Harry Potter from his mother.

Nonetheless I opened the text with eagerness as well, hoping it would bring some sign that Shaun wasn’t completely mad anymore.

'Hey, girl, I got something I think you ought to know. Hey, babe, I wanna tell you that I love you so. I wanna hold you in my arms, yeah! I’m never gonna let you go, ‘cause I like your charms.
I love you and I’m really sorry : ( <3’

I smiled widely when I read the text to find out he wasn’t mad at me anymore. I quickly replied to him and told him he’d better be home tonight for dinner.

I was going to fix everything tonight, because I knew that if I didn’t the moment might never arise again and that Shaun and I wouldn’t ever go back to normal.