Undisclosed Desires

Renesmee reached back and rested her hand on Jacob’s cheek, frowning impatiently at you. Jacob laughed and nodded.

“She wants to meet you,” he said, smiling at you. “Is that alright?”

Your stomach fluttered in excitement and you nodded.

“How did she say that?” You wondered as Jake stood and walked to you. Renesmee was bouncing impatiently, reaching towards you. Jacob set her in your lap. She was surprising light for looking almost six years old. But no way she could be six…

“She ages faster than normal,” Edward said, grinning at you.

“Doesn’t that get annoying?” You asked Bella, frowning at Edward. She shrugged and
said,

“He can’t read my mind.”

“Lucky…” You, Paul and Jacob muttered together. Edward chuckled.

Renesmee positioned herself on your lap, and then tentatively reached up for your face.
You leaned down and closed the gap.

A brutal, bloody image of someone flashed into your mind, and you gasped.
Renesmee quickly drew her hand away, and looked anxiously at you.

“Did I scare you?” She asked, her voice smooth, a gorgeous mixture of Bella’s original
voice, and Edward’s velvet-smooth one.

“No,” you assured her, shaking your head. “It was just unexpected. Who was that?”

Renesmee put her hand back to your cheek, and you saw an image of Bella. You
glanced sideways.

“When I was born,” she said softly.

“Bella had to go through her change,” Edward explained, resting on the arm of the
couch by Bella. “She couldn’t see Renesmee for three days. It was rough on her. Show her
again, Nessie.”

The image flashed through your head, but this time you were ready for it. You could see
Bella, bruised and bloody from giving birth to Nessie. And you watched as Edward bit her,
infecting her with the venom. And then it flashed to another image. One of Jacob, smiling
down at her. You could feel, actually feel, the wave of love and adoration Renesmee felt,
and you couldn’t help but grin.

She began showing you other, less important images; what she did yesterday, what
she wanted to do today. She beamed up at you as you saw an image of yourself, the pack
and the Cullens gathered around the dining table.

“You want us to stay for dinner?” You asked, smiling over at Paul as Renesmee
nodded.

“She wants the whole pack,” you informed Jacob, and Renesmee twisted around to
grin at Jacob. Renesmee let her eyes wander, and she noticed Paul’s arm wrapped around
your shoulder. She tilted her head to the side, and you saw an image of Jacob. You heard
her soft voice ring out in your head,

My Jacob.

Then she looked pointedly at Paul, and back to you. You decided to play her mind
game. You thought of Paul’s face, and then said in your head,

My Paul.

Renesmee grinned and then pulled her hand away, hopping off of your lap. She
danced over to Edward, who lifted her smoothly and held her to his chest. Your heart felt
warmed at the simple family love.

Family.

Oh SHIT! you thought, your eyes going wide.

Edward’s head snapped around at the sudden loud thought. In turn, everyone turned to
look at you. Paul tightened his arm and looked down at you anxiously.

“Alex, what’s-“

“I’ve been missing for nearly a day!” you exclaimed, jumping up.

Bad idea.

Your leg shrieked in protest and your side began to throb. You swayed for a second, but
Paul was up and holding you steady in an instant.

“My dad… God, he’s probably in a panic right now! And Nikki…. I need to get home!” You
insisted, hobbling towards the door. Paul gently held you back.

“How’re you gonna explain your injuries?” He asked, looking worried. You opened your
mouth to answer, but quickly closed it.

“I… have no idea,” You admitted, taking a step back and allowing Paul to help you sink
into the couch.

Carlisle strode forward and smiled down at you.

“You went for a hike in the woods,” he explained, a mischievous gleam in his eye. “You
got lost, and fell. Your injuries looked pretty bad when the group of Quileute hikers found
you and brought you to the hospital.” You nodded, beginning to like this theory. “I stitched
you up overnight, and tried calling the house a few times.”

“The line was busy, and you didn’t leave a message. Simple as that,” you concluded,
beaming up at him.

Paul stood and then, wrapping an arm around your back and sliding the other one
under your legs, he lifted you easily and carried you back to Jacob’s car. You felt yourself
blush and said,

“You know, I could’ve just walked out here…”

“But why did you need to? You have a perfectly good wolf-boyfriend at your service!” He
flashed you a grin, and gently lowered you into the car. You, Paul, Jacob and Seth took off
back down the dirt road. It felt better to be able to see everything now.

The glint of the sun from behind you caught your eye, and you turned to see a black
Mercedes following you. Carlisle was driving, with Bella in the front and Edward, with
Renesmee, in the back.

Your eyes kept dropping down to look at the speedometer, noticing the car reaching
ninety miles an hour.

“Uh, Jake?” You asked, your voice a little higher pitched from nervousness.

“’Sup?” He asked, glancing back at you.

“I-I think you’re speeding just a bit,” you said, eyeing the trees flashing past you.
Carlisle had no trouble keeping up.

“Oh don’t worry,” Jake laughed, shaking his head. “I’ve got this under control.”

“I sure as hell hope you do,” you muttered, sinking into Paul’s arms and feeling a little
better.

Thanks to Jacob’s frightening speeds, you reached the hospital in less than half an
hour. Carlisle was right behind you, and he was out of the car and reaching in for you
immediately. He lifted you just as effortlessly as Paul had, and he whispered,

“Look like you’re in pain.”

You let your head hang over his arm and you screwed up your face, trying to look like
you imagined you had when that other wolf had attacked you. Thinking of that made you
wince, and Carlisle murmured,

“Perfect, keep it up.”

A few moments later, you were laid across a hospital bed. Carlisle shut the door and
was instantly over by the drawer with the hospital gowns. You had to get used to their
incredible speed. Carlisle was then at your side, handing you a gown.

“Change into this. Sorry to say, you’ll need to lay in here for a few hours, just to make
the whole thing plausible. I’ll call your parents in a few minutes and tell them the story.” You
nodded, and waited until Carlisle left. Before you could start stripping down, Paul slid into
the room with you, and shut the door.

“Thought you could use some company,” he began, and then spotted the gown. “And
maybe some help?” You felt yourself blush and you laughed.

“Actually, yes, I do,” you admitted, trying to stand up. Paul walked over and grabbed your
arm, easily lifting you down off the bed. You smiled and then turned your back to him. You
grabbed the end of your shirt and slowly lifted it off; not for the sexual effect it gave, but
because it hurt your side to lift your arms.

“Er, Paul,” you asked, looking back. He raised an eyebrow. “Could you, uh, help me get
this off?”

He laughed and took your shirt from you.

“It’s what I live for.”

You blushed as he helped you out of your shirt. You grabbed the gown and tried to slip it
onto your arms. Paul grabbed that too and helped you put your arms through the sleeves,
and then tied the string in back. You turned and smiled at him, and then unbuttoned your
jeans. You cleared your throat pointedly, and Paul turned away, rolling his eyes. It was
harder than you expected to get your jeans off, but no way were you asking Paul to help
you with that part. Once they were on the ground, you smiled and said,

“Okay, you can turn around now.” He immediately did so, and grinned. A wave of
embarrassment passed over you and you blushed.

“What?” You demanded, looking down at the gown. “What’s wrong?”

He walked forward and wrapped his arms around you tenderly.

“You look beautiful in anything.”

You’d never really had guys call you beautiful before, and you blushed again. You
hugged him back, and he helped you onto the bed. A few moments later, Carlisle knocked,
and when you gave him the O.K., he pushed the door open.

“I explained to your parents, and they’re on their way,” he said, shutting the door. “Your
father was worried, but I think he believes me.”

You let out a sigh of relief and said,

“Thanks, Carlisle. I owe you one.”

He smiled at you and said,

“The procedure would take about three hours, so you need to stay here for that long.
Feel free to do whatever you’d like,” he insisted, settling into a chair.

As you stretched back onto the bed, a wave of drowsiness swept over you. You
snuggled into the bed, and closed your eyes. Instantly, you felt a glow of warmth next to you.
Paul climbed into the bed with you, and he wrapped his arms around you, holding you
tightly to him. You drifted off into a comforting sleep, and nestled into his arms.

***

“Alex, it’s time to get up.”

Carlisle’s heavenly voice drifted into your dreams, and you reluctantly opened your
eyes. You felt groggy and disoriented, and you didn’t want to move.

“You look like you just came out of surgery,” Carlisle mused. “Perfect.”

Paul climbed out of the bed and disappeared out the back door. Carlisle situated you
gently, making you look more ‘official’.

And then, he opened the door and beckoned your parents into the room.

Your dad was first, of course. His face was contorted with worry, and he dropped into the
chair to your right, grabbing your hand. You gave him a half asleep smile, which he
interpreted as you being in pain.

“Alexis, honey? Are you alright?”

“Yeah, dad, I’m fine,” You assured him, giving him the best smile you could muster. A few
seconds later, your sister came rushing in, nearly knocking into Carlisle in her hurry. She
climbed onto the left side of the bed and took your other hand, a few stray tears on her face.

“I was so worried Alex!” She cried, dropping down and burying her face on your shoulder.

“I’m fine, Nikki, really,” you said, pulling your hand out of hers to stroke her hair. She was
still sniffling as Trisha strode through the room.

“Alexis,” she snapped, her icy eyes staring daggers at you. “I told you to do one thing,
and you manage to screw that up.” You glared back at her, feeling your cheeks growing hot.
Your dad cleared his throat and stood up, slowly taking his hand away from yours. He slid
out of the room as Trisha continued.

“Everything in this house always has to be about you, doesn’t it?”

“I’m sorry I nearly killed myself,” you snapped, trying to hold back the wave of anger you felt.
“I’ll throw myself off a cliff next time to make sure I don’t screw that up too.” You felt Nichole
flinch into you, and you held her tighter.

Trisha gave a delicate snort and said,

“Next time, listen to what I say and maybe you wont have a problem.” She turned and
asked Carlisle,

“Can she leave? She has some housework to finish up.”

“If she feels alright,” Carlisle answered, glancing over at you. His face was etched with
concern, and you knew he didn’t like your stepmom one bit. That made two of you. “But she
really shouldn’t do any physical work until her stitches come out.”

“I don’t care what she should or shouldn’t do. If she wasn’t so irresponsible, she wouldn’t
have done this in the first place.”

Paul’s face was disappointed; you knew he didn’t want to leave you, because you didn’t
want to leave him. But as you were thinking about staying, Nichole looked up at you and
said,

“Please come home, Alex?” Sometimes it was hard for you to forget that she was
fifteen, not five. There was evident pain in her voice; she had been overly worried about you,
and now she wanted you home to make sure you were okay. You didn’t want to leave Paul,
but you couldn’t be away from your sister tonight.

“I’m fine,” I assured everyone in the room. Trisha muttered something about faking the
injuries as she stormed out of the room. Edward was the first to speak.

“How do you stand her?” he growled, looking out the door, his face in a frown.

“Not very well,” you admitted, thinking over the last few encounters with Trisha. Edward
snickered as Paul walked over to help you up.

“Are you sure you want to go home?” He asked, lifting you to your feet. He handed you
your clothes, and you struggled to pull your jeans on.

“I don’t want to, but I have to,” you corrected him, buttoning up your pants and
turning around to pull your shirt on. Paul helped you again. “I’m a year younger than Bella,
so I still get to go to school. I have my homework, laundry, and probably other things to take
care of.” Paul sighed in disappointment with you as you slipped your shoes on. Nichole
hopped off the bed and looked up at Paul.

“Who is he?” she whispered to you.

“Nik, this is Paul. He’s the one who found me in the forest.”

Nichole grinned up at him, and suddenly wrapped her arms around him and squeezed
him as tight as she could.

“Thanks for saving my sister,” she said, giving him a final squeeze. He gave her a
gentle hug back and said,

“Anytime.”

You two met eyes, and you felt a wave of warmth spread over you. As Nichole pulled
away and took your hand to walk out, she whispered,

“I definitely approve.”

You heard Edward chuckle under his breath as Paul matched your pace and walked
you out to the waiting room.

Trisha was standing outside, smoking of course. Your dad was hunched over in a
chair, and only looked up when you called out,

“Dad, you ready to go?”

“Alexis,” he sighed, glancing back at Trisha. “Your mother and I-“

“She is not my mother!”

“Fine!” he snapped, standing up suddenly. His burst of anger made you flinch back into
Paul, who wrapped his arm around you. Nichole was staring warily at your dad as he
continued. “Trisha and I… we feel that Forks isn’t the best place for you or your sister.”

“What?” you asked, feeling all the color drain from your face. Paul’s arm tightened. You
knew what he was thinking.

“Ever since your mother died, and Edward and Bella moved away-“

“Bella and Edward are back, dad,” you insisted, feeling your anxiety creeping higher
and higher. “They’re right in the other room.”

“Alexis, you know that’s not my point,” he continued, staring fiercely between you and
Nichole. “You’ve been in a bad place for a few years now, and it’s obviously getting worse.
Trisha and I have decided to move back to California.”

“I hope you have a great time there, dad,” you said, pulling Nichole into your other side.

“You’re coming with us,” he said pointedly, looking at you and then Nichole. “We’re
leaving Monday.”

Your whole body seemed to freeze up as your dad said that last sentence. Leaving Monday? That was in two days! It was already late Saturday, and you knew all tomorrow
you’d be packing to leave. So what, you only got a few hours to say goodbye to your
soulmate and your best friends? You knew you couldn’t leave. No way.

“Lets go, Alexis.”

“I can’t leave Forks, dad.” You insisted, hardening your glare. You couldn’t let him see
you cry. Then it would be all over. You had to stay strong. Nichole was visibly upset; she was
sniffing and you could feel the warm tears dropping down onto your arm. She didn’t want to
leave either.

“I don’t care,” he said angrily, marching forward and grabbing your arm. He yanked you
away from Paul, and you felt as if your heart had been ripped in two. You could feel Pauls
agony washing through him. This was possibly the last time you would see him. Your dad
dragged you and Nichole out to the car. The pouring rain was soaking through your clothes,
and you shivered. Your leg was aching, along with your side, and you tried to keep from
falling over.

As your dad paused to unlock the doors, you looked back.

Paul was slumped down on the waiting room chair, staring helplessly after you. Jacob
and Seth were standing behind him, each with one hand on his shoulder. Bella was
standing a little ways in front of him, holding Renesmee, who had one hand stretched
towards you. Edward had his arms wrapped around them, staring angrily at your dad.
Carlisle was shaking his head in sadness. You needed to go back. You lunged toward the
hospital, but your dad was stronger. He held onto you and practically stuffed you into the car.

You couldn’t look back again. You closed your eyes and slumped against the seat as
Trisha climbed into the front seat. Your dad rested his hand on your knee and patted it
gently. You slid out of his reach. Nichole curled up against your side, and you held her tight.

The car took off into the night, pulling you farther and farther away from everything you
loved in the world. At least you had Nichole.

But you would never have Paul again. You had just found him, and now you would
never see him again. Bella and Edward were still in Forks. You could have seen them every
day, and now you were leaving.

A few tears rolled down your cheeks and as the car turned onto the highway, you heard
an agonizing howl pierce the sky.