Rants

Nothing makes much since anymore. Everything is blurring together like some kind of Neon Vortex type thing. It’s like my life is literally in the fast lane at this point. Everything has been happening so quickly that I don’t have time to register what’s going on. This year has gone by so fast that I barely remember the first day of school.

So many pointless “heartbreaks” that I’ve wasted tears over only to discover later that those idiots weren’t even worth my time. So many things with my family, fights and other stupid crap. Stuff that I wanted to do but never accomplished. Now I know what people mean when they say high school goes by fast.

All the stupid “cliques” and popularity shit ain’t nothing. What happens when these self-proclaimed “populars” get to college? No one’s going to give them the time of day because they’ll be nobodies! No one’s going to care that they were voted Homecoming Queen or Prom King.

I’ve been trying to have fun in high school but it’s really hard, it’s all because of these stupid stereotypes & stuck-up bitches. How does being a rude bitch to people make you popular? I’ve made so many new friends this year simply because I’ve been nice, and people say that being nice makes you popular. No, not really.

Besides my new friends, nothing else good has come out of high school so far. I don’t know what’s happening, I’m losing control of everything in my life and I’m scared. My life has changed so much. Some changes are good and some I don’t like.

I’ve lost touch of who I really am, even though I’m not sure who I am or what I want to be yet. I’m trying to figure it out but I’m a teenager and these are supposed to be confusing years, right? When will I really know who Sara McDonald is? When I’m 21? When I’m 80? When? Suppose I never figure it out, what then? How am I supposed to fix the puzzle and find what piece I’m missing?

Oh well, this is pointless rambling. I’m just bored in History and got to thinking about things again. I’ve gotta stop doing that, letting my mind wonder. It gets me nowhere.