Teal.
Tumbling.
It feels like somethings breaking between us. She won't look at me, and I can't keep the anger from frothing on my lips. I know I should stop, or that I should stop her, but knowing and doing are two very different things. “I hate you.” Willow spits, but she won't meet my gaze. “I hate you. I hate you a-a-and i-” she pauses and shuts her eyes, as if keeping them shut tightly enough will force me away. “I don't want to see you ever again. Go away.”
“Willow, you're such a brat.” I'm seething. If I were anyone else, if she were anyone else I wouldn't be here right now. I would be anywhere but here. She's supposed to be my best friend, and she can't even be bothered to look at me right now. “This is me, Willow. You're always telling me that you know I have big secrets from you. This is my only secret. Right here. And now you know it. Why … “ But I can't finish this sentence. I can't start thinking about all of the why's or the what ifs because they're all to heartbreaking. Because the truth is, everything has changed. One morning was enough for her to forget what we were ever supposed to mean to each other. Our lines have been drawn, our roles have been written. We both know the ending.
I'm a dragon, and she's a human. We'll never be able to be friends.
Except that we had been. We're standing in the middle of the forest because we were friends. We are. We're just... going through a minor slip up. I try explaining this to Willow but she doesn't look half impressed. “We were friends because you were lying to me, which means that we weren't even friends to begin with. You can't b-be friends with someone you're lying to.”
“I didn't lie, I just... I just didn't tell you.”
“A lie by omission, is still a lie.” She says it like it's well rehearsed. I don't want to think about those words being hers. “You could have told me, Gabe. I'm supposed to be your best friend, I-” She frowns. She still won't look at me. Won't look at the ugly blue horns, or the scars, any of it. She's as terrified and disgusted by me as I am.
“You can't even look at me. Why would I have told you when you wouldn't have believed me? And if you ever did, we'd just be here again. I didn't want to loo-” A scratch, heavy breathing, and that pull that tightens everything in my chest stops me. Since my dad left there's only been two times that I've felt this magnetic pull that not so subtly informs me that there's another dragon close. A predator. Fear grips my vocal chords and I turn, lowering my head and charging at Willow. I see the terror on her face for a split second before I feel her miniscule weight hovering on my antlers. good for something, I think as I run. I have to put as much space as I can between me, the pull, and whatever kind of dragon is out here. Willow is screaming, punching and kicking in a way that would be cute if It wasn't so painful.
“Get me off!” She's screaming, no wailing. Its painful, especially with her mouth so close to my ears. She kicks down hard over my eye, and I almost slam us into a tree. “Get me off! Get me off! Get me off! Get me off!” Each word is accentuated with a punch or sharp kick, just in case I didn't get the message that she doesn't exactly like being held right now. Not that I can really consider her perching on my head holding.
I don't have time to talk her through the dangers of another dragon being around. “There's something in the woods.”
“Yeah. Me, and you.” She screams. Her terror; my pain. I jerk away from the sharp noise, and up the hill. Once I get to the top we can hide in the trees until it's okay. Its going to be okay, I try to tell myself. Everything is going to be fine as long as we get to the top of the hill. Its our safe zone. It seems so close, I can almost taste it. I can almost smell the stinking stench of victory, a fail proof save.
There's only one problem.
The mountaintop doesn't peak and then slowly descend again. Once I'm at the top, once its too late, I see the plummeting drop on the other side of the peak. My muscles and tendons and every part of my body screams in protest when I try to make a swift left back towards solid ground, but with my useless right wing to throw me off balance, I end up tumbling towards the cliff. I throw my wing out in a futile attempt to keep up upright, but its too late. I can feel Willow's body weight topple down my back and slip past my tail, her screams echoing off of all of the mountains. I turn to the ledge and instinctively dive to catch her. I know I can't fly with one wing, I know that this is the most suicidal thing I've ever done before in my entire life, but I don't care. I can't care. Not when Willow is screaming my name, her arms outstretched, silently begging me to save her. Even her screams have stopped. I catch her less than a hundred feet from the ground. Its only enough time for me to curl myself around her, the only protection I can offer, before we hit the ground with enough force to make the entire world fade to black.
There was too much to process. I can't move. I can feel my muscles twitching underneath my dead weight, but my brain is too foggy to understand what I'm trying to do. I don't even want to move. I want to stay here, where its warm and cozy and... uncomfortable. Sort of slimy. Nevermind, I want out. Too bad you can't always get what you want. I can't even remember how I got here in the first place, but now the smell of damp dirt and the way leaves are crunching like brittle bones underneath me is making me uneasy. I shift in place for a little while before I realize that an oversized wing is crumpled around me, and the sharp pricks of pain I wrote off as sticks are really a hell of a lot sharper than any natural stick could ever be.
Then it all comes flooding back.
The chase, the way I tumbled off of his (its) leathery back, the feel of falling. Then Gabe (the monster) catching me, and the way we'd barreled through this never ending mud slush until Gabe (it) couldn't take any more. Fear shoves adrenaline through me, and I crawl out of the safe place Gabes (its) crumpled body made for me. “Jesus Christ. As far as wings go, I think that yours takes the gold medal in fat ass.” I try to tease, rolling my shoulders till the tension ebbs away. Its only after I've categorized my minimal injuries that I realize something that I had to be blind not to notice.
Gabriel isn't awake. Not even this major monster version of Gabe. No. In fact, he's (it's) every bit the opposite of awake. He's (it's) so much the opposite of awake, that I'm convinced he's (it's) dead. Oh my god. My stupid fat mouth killed him (it). “Gabe?” I don't know if my voice is a whimper, a whisper, or not there at all. I poke him (it). His (its) shoulder doesn't shift, he doesn't breathe in and out, nothing. I poke him harder, right under his eye. “Gabe, wake up now.” I command, trying to sound the least bit commanding.
He doesn't respond.
I walk around him (it), shoving every part of his (its) body, trying to wake him up. Nothing works. Then I stop, right in front of his (its) face. I want so badly to think of this as some kind of sick hallucination. Everything since Sunday morning as some post-drug abuse fantasy that I can't get myself out of. But it's all so real right now. Even if it doesn't look like human Gabe, it still looks like him. It still feels like him, the same way you can tell who's standing behind you when you're abnormally close to that person. He's not insane. She's not insane. And oh god those dragon 'believers' weren't insane either. The fierce need to protect him from those crazed dragon hunters wells up in my chest. I walk around him again, trying to memorize everything about this secret part of Gabe that I know hardly anyone else knows about – if anyone. His skin is pearly, like a crystal with a white backdrop. Pink and blue snake-like scales glimmer in the drizzling sunlight. Red marks mar his otherwise beautiful skin. Old scars the size of my forearm thread their way along his skin, and its only as I'm tracing one of them that I see … I don't even know how to describe it. A disaster. Old scar tissue and new skin cling to what's left of the bone where Gabe's left wing should be. But its not. In its place is a disgusting mess of scars, and an untold story. “What happened to you?” I whisper, but the smarter part of me knows that I don't want to know. I follow the trail of scars up to his head. His eyes are golden, I remember – and only the right one has a pupil. Did that mean that he was partially blind? Or was that just a dragon thing? I wish I could see those amber gold eyes directed at me right now. I would even settle for the bitter fighting, if it would mean that he would wake up. I distract myself with his head. Horns more real than any I've ever seen hanging on walls stick out of the top of his head. They're about as tall as me, and teal. It makes me giggle. Who knew that monsters could be so interesting? But my giggle sticks in my throat and I remember why we're even stuck here. There's something after us.
I kick Monster Gabe hard in the chin. “Wake up! Wake up!” I don't want to scream, just in case whatever we were running from decides to come back for round two. OH MY GOD. There's another monster out here somewhere. Somewhere close. Somewhere so close that he could be staring at us right now. He could see me, and think 'mm lunch' and then Gabe will be found by crazed dragon hunters and they'll cut him up and experimental on him, all while I'm being processed in some monsters digestive system.
Hysteria grips my vocal cords. “GABRIEL FINN SULLIVAN, WAKE UP RIGHT NOW.” My voice booms out of my chest, and oh god, oh god, oh god, I can already feel the slimy saliva as the other monster swallows me whole. “Gabe! I can't! You have to! Now!” its only after my throat feels scratchy and worn and I'm choking for breath that I realize I wasn't even using full sentences. I crawl back into the safe cocoon that Monster Gabe's arms left for me, and press my face against his leathery chest, up and down until I find what I'm looking for.
His heartbeat.
It booms loudly in my ear, and I'm convinced that if I were any smaller I would be able to feel the vibrations. I'm shaking enough as it is. I don't know what to do, but I feel like I've been screaming around him for hours. The blue sky is streaked with pink above the trees. “Please wake up soon, Gabey.” I whisper,pressing my face against his paw. Just thinking the word brings hysterical laughter to my lips. I say it out loud, just to get a feel for it. “Gabe's paw.” Out loud, it doesn't sound half as entertaining. Just doubly frightening. I close my eyes, knowing I won't sleep, but needing some semblance of rest. My best friend can somehow morph into a dragon, and he's lying half dead in the middle of the woods, too far away for either of us to walk.
“Willow, you're such a brat.” I'm seething. If I were anyone else, if she were anyone else I wouldn't be here right now. I would be anywhere but here. She's supposed to be my best friend, and she can't even be bothered to look at me right now. “This is me, Willow. You're always telling me that you know I have big secrets from you. This is my only secret. Right here. And now you know it. Why … “ But I can't finish this sentence. I can't start thinking about all of the why's or the what ifs because they're all to heartbreaking. Because the truth is, everything has changed. One morning was enough for her to forget what we were ever supposed to mean to each other. Our lines have been drawn, our roles have been written. We both know the ending.
I'm a dragon, and she's a human. We'll never be able to be friends.
Except that we had been. We're standing in the middle of the forest because we were friends. We are. We're just... going through a minor slip up. I try explaining this to Willow but she doesn't look half impressed. “We were friends because you were lying to me, which means that we weren't even friends to begin with. You can't b-be friends with someone you're lying to.”
“I didn't lie, I just... I just didn't tell you.”
“A lie by omission, is still a lie.” She says it like it's well rehearsed. I don't want to think about those words being hers. “You could have told me, Gabe. I'm supposed to be your best friend, I-” She frowns. She still won't look at me. Won't look at the ugly blue horns, or the scars, any of it. She's as terrified and disgusted by me as I am.
“You can't even look at me. Why would I have told you when you wouldn't have believed me? And if you ever did, we'd just be here again. I didn't want to loo-” A scratch, heavy breathing, and that pull that tightens everything in my chest stops me. Since my dad left there's only been two times that I've felt this magnetic pull that not so subtly informs me that there's another dragon close. A predator. Fear grips my vocal chords and I turn, lowering my head and charging at Willow. I see the terror on her face for a split second before I feel her miniscule weight hovering on my antlers. good for something, I think as I run. I have to put as much space as I can between me, the pull, and whatever kind of dragon is out here. Willow is screaming, punching and kicking in a way that would be cute if It wasn't so painful.
“Get me off!” She's screaming, no wailing. Its painful, especially with her mouth so close to my ears. She kicks down hard over my eye, and I almost slam us into a tree. “Get me off! Get me off! Get me off! Get me off!” Each word is accentuated with a punch or sharp kick, just in case I didn't get the message that she doesn't exactly like being held right now. Not that I can really consider her perching on my head holding.
I don't have time to talk her through the dangers of another dragon being around. “There's something in the woods.”
“Yeah. Me, and you.” She screams. Her terror; my pain. I jerk away from the sharp noise, and up the hill. Once I get to the top we can hide in the trees until it's okay. Its going to be okay, I try to tell myself. Everything is going to be fine as long as we get to the top of the hill. Its our safe zone. It seems so close, I can almost taste it. I can almost smell the stinking stench of victory, a fail proof save.
There's only one problem.
The mountaintop doesn't peak and then slowly descend again. Once I'm at the top, once its too late, I see the plummeting drop on the other side of the peak. My muscles and tendons and every part of my body screams in protest when I try to make a swift left back towards solid ground, but with my useless right wing to throw me off balance, I end up tumbling towards the cliff. I throw my wing out in a futile attempt to keep up upright, but its too late. I can feel Willow's body weight topple down my back and slip past my tail, her screams echoing off of all of the mountains. I turn to the ledge and instinctively dive to catch her. I know I can't fly with one wing, I know that this is the most suicidal thing I've ever done before in my entire life, but I don't care. I can't care. Not when Willow is screaming my name, her arms outstretched, silently begging me to save her. Even her screams have stopped. I catch her less than a hundred feet from the ground. Its only enough time for me to curl myself around her, the only protection I can offer, before we hit the ground with enough force to make the entire world fade to black.
There was too much to process. I can't move. I can feel my muscles twitching underneath my dead weight, but my brain is too foggy to understand what I'm trying to do. I don't even want to move. I want to stay here, where its warm and cozy and... uncomfortable. Sort of slimy. Nevermind, I want out. Too bad you can't always get what you want. I can't even remember how I got here in the first place, but now the smell of damp dirt and the way leaves are crunching like brittle bones underneath me is making me uneasy. I shift in place for a little while before I realize that an oversized wing is crumpled around me, and the sharp pricks of pain I wrote off as sticks are really a hell of a lot sharper than any natural stick could ever be.
Then it all comes flooding back.
The chase, the way I tumbled off of his (its) leathery back, the feel of falling. Then Gabe (the monster) catching me, and the way we'd barreled through this never ending mud slush until Gabe (it) couldn't take any more. Fear shoves adrenaline through me, and I crawl out of the safe place Gabes (its) crumpled body made for me. “Jesus Christ. As far as wings go, I think that yours takes the gold medal in fat ass.” I try to tease, rolling my shoulders till the tension ebbs away. Its only after I've categorized my minimal injuries that I realize something that I had to be blind not to notice.
Gabriel isn't awake. Not even this major monster version of Gabe. No. In fact, he's (it's) every bit the opposite of awake. He's (it's) so much the opposite of awake, that I'm convinced he's (it's) dead. Oh my god. My stupid fat mouth killed him (it). “Gabe?” I don't know if my voice is a whimper, a whisper, or not there at all. I poke him (it). His (its) shoulder doesn't shift, he doesn't breathe in and out, nothing. I poke him harder, right under his eye. “Gabe, wake up now.” I command, trying to sound the least bit commanding.
He doesn't respond.
I walk around him (it), shoving every part of his (its) body, trying to wake him up. Nothing works. Then I stop, right in front of his (its) face. I want so badly to think of this as some kind of sick hallucination. Everything since Sunday morning as some post-drug abuse fantasy that I can't get myself out of. But it's all so real right now. Even if it doesn't look like human Gabe, it still looks like him. It still feels like him, the same way you can tell who's standing behind you when you're abnormally close to that person. He's not insane. She's not insane. And oh god those dragon 'believers' weren't insane either. The fierce need to protect him from those crazed dragon hunters wells up in my chest. I walk around him again, trying to memorize everything about this secret part of Gabe that I know hardly anyone else knows about – if anyone. His skin is pearly, like a crystal with a white backdrop. Pink and blue snake-like scales glimmer in the drizzling sunlight. Red marks mar his otherwise beautiful skin. Old scars the size of my forearm thread their way along his skin, and its only as I'm tracing one of them that I see … I don't even know how to describe it. A disaster. Old scar tissue and new skin cling to what's left of the bone where Gabe's left wing should be. But its not. In its place is a disgusting mess of scars, and an untold story. “What happened to you?” I whisper, but the smarter part of me knows that I don't want to know. I follow the trail of scars up to his head. His eyes are golden, I remember – and only the right one has a pupil. Did that mean that he was partially blind? Or was that just a dragon thing? I wish I could see those amber gold eyes directed at me right now. I would even settle for the bitter fighting, if it would mean that he would wake up. I distract myself with his head. Horns more real than any I've ever seen hanging on walls stick out of the top of his head. They're about as tall as me, and teal. It makes me giggle. Who knew that monsters could be so interesting? But my giggle sticks in my throat and I remember why we're even stuck here. There's something after us.
I kick Monster Gabe hard in the chin. “Wake up! Wake up!” I don't want to scream, just in case whatever we were running from decides to come back for round two. OH MY GOD. There's another monster out here somewhere. Somewhere close. Somewhere so close that he could be staring at us right now. He could see me, and think 'mm lunch' and then Gabe will be found by crazed dragon hunters and they'll cut him up and experimental on him, all while I'm being processed in some monsters digestive system.
Hysteria grips my vocal cords. “GABRIEL FINN SULLIVAN, WAKE UP RIGHT NOW.” My voice booms out of my chest, and oh god, oh god, oh god, I can already feel the slimy saliva as the other monster swallows me whole. “Gabe! I can't! You have to! Now!” its only after my throat feels scratchy and worn and I'm choking for breath that I realize I wasn't even using full sentences. I crawl back into the safe cocoon that Monster Gabe's arms left for me, and press my face against his leathery chest, up and down until I find what I'm looking for.
His heartbeat.
It booms loudly in my ear, and I'm convinced that if I were any smaller I would be able to feel the vibrations. I'm shaking enough as it is. I don't know what to do, but I feel like I've been screaming around him for hours. The blue sky is streaked with pink above the trees. “Please wake up soon, Gabey.” I whisper,pressing my face against his paw. Just thinking the word brings hysterical laughter to my lips. I say it out loud, just to get a feel for it. “Gabe's paw.” Out loud, it doesn't sound half as entertaining. Just doubly frightening. I close my eyes, knowing I won't sleep, but needing some semblance of rest. My best friend can somehow morph into a dragon, and he's lying half dead in the middle of the woods, too far away for either of us to walk.