After Tonight

Mocha Latte or Café Mocha? Or the seasonal Pumpkin Spice? I glared at the menu board hanging from the wall inside of Starbucks—I was beginning to see the reason why I always stuck to black coffee. When it was finally my turn, I looked at the Barista quizzically, debating what my choice of drink would be.
“Miss…” He looked around, unsure if I was trying to bored holes through his head. This was the usual routine whenever I stopped into a Starbucks, which I’d only attempted several times before. I just ended up paying for something I could brew at home for free.
“Uh yeah, sorry.” I shrugged my shoulders in defeat. “I’ll take a Grande black coffee.” Starbucks—10, Abbey—0.
As I waited 15 minutes for my coffee—which you had to do in the city—I mulled over the rest of my day. I was meeting some new clients who’d read about Faye’s in a travel magazine and wanted to know if we’d cater their February wedding. Who gets married in February, I haven’t the foggiest. Jo wanted me to take the meeting because she had her own wedding plans to complete.
Yes that’s correct; Jeff had finally popped the question. In September. Jo wanted a winter wedding and because she would not wait another year, she was in full Bridezilla mode as she tried to get the beautiful December wedding she’d always dreamed of. That was Jo for you.
Rob had been gone for a month now and I’d begun a Christmas Countdown on every calendar I had, and I had three.
With the time difference, we’d barely gotten to have an actual conversation. Everything was done between emails, voicemails, and texts. I was beginning to loathe modern technology. When I mentioned this to Rob, he promised to write me a letter instead of an email next time. That wasn’t the point I was trying to make, but I was thrilled to find something in my mailbox besides junk and bills.
He loved Australia. With each email he sent pictures and though it bothered me that a quarter of them starred his leggy blonde costar, I was happy to know he was having fun. I’d promised him that I would read I Am the Messenger before he came back home, so I would have a leg up on everyone else when I watched the movie, and every time we talked he asked me what part I was at.
When I finally got my coffee, I pulled a copy of the book out of my bag and sat down at one of the nearby tables. I had some time to kill before I had to meet the future Mr. and Mrs. Malone.
It was really a terrific book, but I hadn’t expected it to be anything less. Rob had really great taste when it came to that kind of stuff.
“Abbey?” I looked up at the person who’d said my name. It was Eric.
“Eric…” I hadn’t seen him since I packed my things and walked out.
“How are you?” He was way too enthusiastic for someone who was looking at the woman who dumped him right before they were married.
“Fantastic, what about you?” I smiled warmly, trying to match his energy.
“Mind if I sit down?” he asked, pulling out a chair. Yes I do, thank you. “I’m great, just got another great ad.” Eric worked for an advertising firm.
“Oh that’s good!” I stuffed my book back into my bag, grabbing my coffee before I was asked to answer any more questions. “I’m sorry, but I’ve got a meeting next door in ten minutes. I should get—”
“How about we get lunch sometime then?” Eric jumped up from the table. “What about tomorrow? I’ve still got your cell.”
“I, er, well I can’t.”
“I’ll call you!”
I dashed out of the door, embracing the sunshine and the rancid NYC air. Had I gotten out of there in time? Why would Eric even be interested in seeing me again—I’d taken his heart, stomped on it and then thrown it out the window only for it to be run over by a taxi. Why?
I went inside The Sunflower to wait at the bar. It was only one o’clock and I was drinking a shot. Just one though, I only needed one and my nerves would be calm. While I waited, I called Jo. Going in, I knew I’d made a mistake and when Jo’s panicked voice picked up, I wanted to hang up. I’d be on the phone for hours listening to complaints about this caterer who only served salmon with lemongrass, or these balloons aren’t latex-free so Cousin Chase will go into anaphylactic shock, or how her diet has been ant-sized portions of food yet she’s still put on three pounds.
“Hey Jo, just thought I’d let you know I’m meeting with the Malones right now, er, I mean the future Malones—I know you’re busy. Sorry! Talk to you later.”
After narrowly escaping that disaster, I ordered another shot. Two were not going to kill me or the deal with the Malones. Aside from the first time I’d met Rob’s parents, I was excellent at holding my liquor. When I saw the happy couple walk through the doors, I downed it quickly and stood up, flatting my skirt and putting on a smile.
The cake they’d decided on was easily the most obnoxious thing I’d ever seen. It was supposed to represent their honeymoon in Hawaii, which was the entire theme of the wedding. Again I plead the question; February? It was four tiers of vanilla cake with pineapple chunks, covered in pink fondant. On top of that we had to recreate a scene from a picture of the brochure. Fantastic.
…
Hours later I sat on my couch with a sketchbook, trying to find some possible way to make an edible volcano that did not look like a pile of shit. Jude (which is the name Rob and I finally decided on for the puppy) nudged my legs from the ground and whined. Potty break. I attached her leash and took her outside.
It had only been a month since we’d gotten her and already she was beginning to fill out her polar bear-sized paws. So far she’d been a breeze, only having minor accidents in the flat which I’d been immensely thankful for. Rob frequently asked for updates so I always sent him pictures—it was like he thought of Jude as his baby, which made me laugh.
Before going to bed, I checked my email in hopes of finding something from Rob. Nothing. So I sent him one, deciding it was best to leave my run-in with Eric out of it. Rob had no idea I’d been engaged before I met him. It just hadn’t come up. Ever. What was I supposed to say to him, “Hi Rob, did you know I was engaged and left the guy before our wedding?”—it just wasn’t something I would bring up in daily conversation.
…
I spent the first 12 hours of the next day terrified of my cell phone. I had deleted Eric’s number at least three years ago and was slightly irked that he hadn’t crossed me off his contact list as well. If I’d kept his number, I would’ve have given him a specialized ring. Once lunchtime came and went, I felt a little relieved. He must have forgotten. Oh shucks.
But of course I wasn’t going to get off so easily; he called me around two in the afternoon explaining it was “crunch time” for this new ad and he wouldn’t be free for several weeks.
“Oh, Eric that’s too bad. But ya’ know, I’ve really got to get going.” I sighed.
“Hey, not so fast!” I could not believe he was wrestling me for a lunch date. “What about November 20? Say, around 12:30. It’s a Thursday—I know you’ve got the day off.” The fact that he remembered my work schedule alone was enough for a restraining order.
“Yeah sure. That sounds good.” I replied, smacking myself in the forehead.
“Great. I can’t wait!”
“Oh yeah…” I forced the words through my teeth. “Me too…”
…
As much as I tried to prolong it, November 20 came as expected. Again, I decided to keep it from Rob. Did he really need to know about an insignificant, innocent—on my part anyway—lunch date with an ex? I didn’t really think it was necessary.
Allie thought I should tell Rob. She called me as I walked into the quaint restaurant Eric had told me to meet him at.
“C’mon Abbey.” Allie was always the voice of reason in our relationship. It always took me a while to get to reason; I was rash. “Think of how upset you would be if Rob met up with some other girl for lunch and didn’t tell you.” She had a point, but I’d already made up my mind. It wasn’t as if I was planning to cheat on Rob—hell no.
“Allie, it’s not going to happen. And besides, I’m here already. I’ll talk to you later after The Office.”
“Alright Abbey.” Allie had admitted defeat. “Just remember that I warned you.”
“And I love you for that. I see him a table, talk to you later.”
…
Eric looked polished as usual. He was always one of those guys who looked like he’d stepped out of a J. Crew catalog. It had never bothered me before, but looking at him now I wanted to vomit. I missed Rob’s worn t-shirts and jeans. When he saw me, he stood up grinning ear to ear.
“Abbey!” He greeted me with a bear-hug, his black curls mashing against my shocked face.
“Hey Eric.” I stammered. “How’s it going?”
“Great, just great.” He beamed at me and sat back down. This guy needed a thesaurus. I could think of at least twenty other words that meant the same thing as “great”.
I sat down across from him, trying to figure out his game plan. Before a single thought was able to come into my mind, he bombarded me with questions. How was the bakery? How were my parents? Was Gracie still at school? How many kids does Keith have? What was Jo up to? What had I been doing these past few years?
Just answering him was wearing me out.
“So are you seeing anyone?” Ah ha, there it was.
“Er, yeah. Actually I am.” I chose my words carefully, not wanting to discuss my love-life with Eric. He looked stunned.
“Really?”
“Yes. Robert.” Why was he so surprised? “I mean, his name is Robert.”
“Is that so? How long have you been together?” Eric leaned back in his chair, looking quite perplexed.
“A year this month actually.”
“That’s great.” Great. “Ya’ know, I’ve been thinking about you a lot lately—really hoping we could give it another try…it’s been on my mind for some time now and when I saw you the other day...” Eric had just dropped the atomic bomb on Hiroshima.
“Excuse me?” I realized my tongue had gotten dry and shut my open mouth.
“I’ve been thinking about you a lot.” He said this to me with complete confidence. “And then when I ran into you at Starbucks, I thought it was a sign. You believe in signs still, don’t you?”
I had to collect my thoughts. There I was, sitting across from a man I’d once planned a future with. My boyfriend of a year was on another continent and I’d gotten myself into the worst possible situation. I took that as sign that Rob could never leave me for longer than a week.
“I believe in signs that I see.” What a well-crafted response Abbey. Not. “When you asked me out to lunch I had no intention of getting back together with you.”
“I don’t believe you.” Eric smiled smugly. “You wouldn’t be here right now if that thought hadn’t crossed your mind.”
“Really, Eric?” Was that what this looked like to him?
Was that what this looked like to everyone? How could I have been so naïve?
“Absolutely. You know it too.”
“I think it’s time for me to leave.” I stood up and walked out the door, Eric close on my heels.
“Abbey c’mon. Don’t lie to yourself!” Eric shouted once we were back outside.
“Are you kidding me?” I asked, snapping around. I was furious. “Stop lying to yourself, Eric. Don’t you realize how pathetic it is that you still have my phone number? It’s been almost four years! Get over it man.”
“You always were a bit feisty.”
“That’s it.” Pointing my finger in his face, I stepped closer. “Don’t try calling me again, we are through. I thought I made that crystal clear when I told you our engagement was off.”
“You weren’t ready. Abbey, I get it.”
“Stop twisting my words!” I jabbed him in the shoulder.
And then Eric kissed me. On the lips. In broad daylight on a crowded street.
“You’re a fucking asshole!” I sneered, pulling away. “I’m done here. If you ever come near me again, I’ll get a restraining order on your ass.” I couldn’t even wait for a response from the bastard. I turned sharply on my heel and walked the other way. Once I’d made it a few streets over, I hailed a cab.
“Stupid. Stupid!” I pounded my head against the window, earning a condemning look from the cabby. “This is my stop!”
I paid the man and raced up to the flat. Ah, saying the word “flat” made me think of Rob. I had unintentionally cheated on him! What the hell was wrong with me? Jude jumped up from her usual spot when I nearly kicked down the apartment door.
…
“Allie…” I called my best friend to whine. She had been right along. It was a horrible, stupid, ludicrous idea to meet Eric for lunch.
“I’m not going to say ‘I told you so’, but what are you going to say to Rob?”
“I have no idea.”
“Well you better think of something.” Yeah, I knew that.
The Next Week:
I’d survived seven days without telling Rob about my little incident. I’d come to conclusion that I would rather tell him in person and avoid any mishaps over the phone. He’d be home at Christmas, which wasn’t the most opportune time to tell him but at least I was telling him.
I should’ve known that any plan I came up with, no matter how perfect, would somehow turn into a disaster.
…
It was time for the Macy’s parade and I’d arrived at my parents’ a little early. Jo let me in with a disapproving look. Had I accidentally let it slip how ugly I thought her wedding dress was?
“Have you seen this week’s USweekly?” She thrust the tabloid in my face.
“No Jo, I haven’t. The excitement wore off pretty quickly.”
“Well you’d better check this out.”
Oh hell no.
Page twelve. I’d landed an entire corner on page twelve.

While Roberts Away, Abbey Will Play

Underneath the disgusting headline were pictures of Eric and me at Starbucks, as well as that disastrous restaurant that I couldn’t even remember the name of. And of course, this collage would not be complete without a picture of Eric kissing me. Right next to that was a picture of Rob from the set of I Am the Messenger. Wasn’t this considered slander or something?
“While Robert Pattinson heads Down Under to film his latest project, I Am the Messenger, his girlfriend of just a year spreads a little message of her own. Come to find out, this man Abbey Jones, 25, has been spotted around New York City with is none other than Eric Jeffries, her ex-fiancé. Shouldn’t somebody let Rob know that their engagement is back on?”
“I need to sit down.” I felt lightheaded. Vomit licked the back of my throat.
“Care to explain Abbey?” Jo was more upset than she should’ve been, but I ignored it. I was horrified.
“I, I gotta call Rob. Right now. I have to call him.”
“You can’t call him Abbey. You can’t do something like this over the phone.”
“You’re right, you’re right. I have to go down and see him. Like now.”
“Don’t leave today.” Jo softened up a little. “Get a ticket for tomorrow and use today to prep. You just need to collect your thoughts. He might be so excited to see you that he won’t even care…”
“Yeah.” I snorted.
“Just enjoy your Thanksgiving and fix it tomorrow. Trust me, he’ll understand when he hears your side of the story.”
The Macy’s Day Parade sucked. I’d never been so unhappy on my favorite holiday in my life, not even last year! My dad noticed my moping and told me to shape up.
“I’m not five, Dad.” I retorted, stomping up the steps to their apartment. “I’m just having a bad day.”
“It’s not over yet Abbey. It’ll get better trust me.” Oh yeah, I’m sure it totally would.
And of course it didn’t. It didn’t because when I opened the door to my parents’ apartment, Rob was sitting in the living room talking to Emma.
“Robert!” I squeaked, stopping so abruptly that Jo ran into my back. A grin lit up Rob’s handsome face, the face I’d gone nearly two months without seeing.
“Aren’t you going to give me a kiss?” Rob laughed from where he was standing up, looking so much taller than I remembered though I knew that was impossible.
“Yeah!” I hiccupped. “Yes. Yes, of course. I’m just so…shocked!” Bursting into a semi-sprint, I threw my arms around him. I’d expected this moment to be wonderful, and I wanted to make it as great as I could before he wanted to push me in front of a cab.
Mmm. He kissed me intensely, forgetting my entire family was less than twenty feet. I really didn’t care.
“What happened to filming?” I asked breathlessly, stepping back from him.
“I’m leaving tomorrow night.” His hands found my waist and he pulled me closer to him. “But I wanted to surprise you—our phone calls and emails haven’t been sustaining me.” I smiled nervously.
Maybe I could just burn every single UsWeekly and he would never have to know.
The dinner went off without a hitch. I’d missed Rob so much that I was able to forget my worries for an hour. It wasn’t until we were cleaning up that the fireworks started.
I was scraping the leftovers into some Tupperware when he found the magazine stashed somewhere on the counter. Nice hiding job, Jo.
“…Abbey?” He looked perplexed, cocking his head to the side the way Jude did whenever I told her to sit.
“Yeah Rob?” I asked nonchalantly, not realizing what was about to go down.
“What, what is this?” I looked up at him, eyes wide and mouth dry as the Sahara.
“I was going to tell you—”
“Tell me what exactly?” He looked absolutely bewildered. “That you kissed another man, or that you kissed another man whom you were engaged to?”
“Rob, I swear. It was nothing.”
“What was nothing?” He spat out the words with such harshness that I flinched.

Rob’s P.O.V.
Page twelve.
Page twelve displayed a prominent photograph of Abbey, my Abbey, snogging some other bloke. My worst nightmare would not have been complete without a description underneath. Come to find out, it was her ex-fiancé, something she’d forgotten to mention.
“Rob, I swear. It was nothing.”
Just exactly how did that come out to be nothing? I leave for a film and she goes chasing some other guy—a guy she happened to want to marry a few years ago. I couldn’t believe this was the girl I’d pictured spending the rest of my life with. Oh yeah, did I forget to mention I’d wanted to marry her? Not anytime soon, but the thought had certainly crossed my mind. I’d flown across the Atlantic Ocean to show that any number of months couldn’t stop me from being in love with her, and that’s what I got in return. She obviously hadn’t cared as much as I truly believed her to.
“Will you at least let me explain?” She was begging now, tears streaming down her perfect face. It sure as hell wasn’t going to change anything, but at least I was being fair.
“You think that’ll make a difference?”
“Rob, please.” And then she launched into her tale, rambling something about Starbucks and Eric and that she hadn’t thought it through and then he just kissed her. It was nauseating to listen to. My head was spinning and I closed my eyes.
“Why am I finding out about him now, Abbey?” I shouted, losing my temper. “It’s been a year. I fucking love you to death and this is what I get out of it all?”
“What was I supposed to say, Rob?” She was shouting now, placing her hands on her hips. “When would it have been appropriate to tell you?”
“Don’t give me that shit!” I was sure her family could hear everything. “You had plenty of opportunities! I’ve told you everything. I found a time to tell you every secret. You know about every goddamn skeleton in my closet. Why don’t I know about yours?”
Silence.
Silence and tears. Even my eyes had welled up.
“I don’t know.” Abbey turned her back to me, sobbing.
“I don’t either.” I snapped. “I thought this was really something, I guess I was wrong.”
“Rob—”
“I dunno what else you want me to say.” All I wanted to do was hop on a plane and go home. “I’ve got to get out of here.” I left her in the kitchen, rushing past her open-mouthed family in the living. “Mr. and Mrs. Jones, the dinner was lovely. Thank you so much.”
I didn’t catch the Red Eye to London. I didn’t go home. Instead, I checked into the Plaza and got plastered.

Abbey’s P.O.V.
It was over. I had fucked up in the worst way and lost everything. My family sat in shock until my mother ran into the kitchen demanding to know what I’d done. I couldn’t even tell her. I just apologized that everyone had to hear Rob and mine’s fight and I left.
When I got in the cab, the last place I wanted to go was back to our flat. But then I remembered Jude, poor little Jude. So I stopped by to pick her up and left for Allie’s. She was waiting at her door with a tub of my favorite Ben&Jerry’s.
I was beginning to wonder why Thanksgiving had been my favorite holiday.