With A Smile So Bright
Gives Me Hope.
It was only Danny, his little brother Will and their father, Michael Miller, since their mother, Rose Miller, passed away a year and a half previously. Mr. Miller always tried so hard with his sons, from making sure dinner was as perfect as he could cook it, which dimmed in comparison to his late wife’s meals, working late at the office, to making sure they did their work, were good, kind young men. He wanted them to excel in school not only academically, but in the athletic department as well.
Will, being only six years old, was in the PeeWee football league their county had, while Danny, at seventeen, was one of the top track runners in not just the county, but the state. Even though their father pushed them into all the sports they played, they each found something exhilarating in the one sport they ended up sticking with. Danny especially loved running because he found himself frequently releasing all his problems from his mind as he ran, hearing only the wind in his ears and the clomping of his tennis shoes on the ground.
Family dinners were always tough in the Miller house. Dinner was usually under or over cooked and there was hardly ever a balance from the food pyramid. Usually, it was canned veggies and some form of meat. It wasn’t much, but the boys appreciated what their father could come up with.
After dinner, Danny would always help his father with clearing the table and assist in washing the dishes, while Will would pick out his clothes for the next day, shower, brush his teeth and get in bed, waiting for Danny to come tuck him in when he finished the dishes with their father, as Mr. Miller would promptly rush out the door to finish up another late night at the office.
Tonight was no different than any other, so as the boys finished eating their grilled steak and green beans, they placed their napkins on their plates, and each took them to the sink, stopping on their way to drop their napkin in the garbage.
“Will, go start your shower,” Danny instructed, as he started putting the leftover food in their respectable Ziploc containers, as their father began rinsing the dishes.
“Okay, Danny,” he said in his small voice, and headed down the hall to his room.
Danny moved to help his father in soaping up the dishes. They continued to discuss topics such as school, as well as what college applications Danny had finished up and which he still needed to complete.
“So you completed your applications to Arizona State, Azusa Pacific, UCLA and Oregon State?” Mr. Miller asked. His son nodded. “Which are the last you’re applying to?”
“San Diego State, University of Boston, and NYU,” he replied.
“Good job, son.”
Danny nodded his head in thanks.
“How are things at school? Any girls catch your eye lately? Are any worthy enough to call themselves your girlfriend?” Mr. Miller chuckled and nudged his son, not taking note of the slight wince Danny produced at his father’s words.
Danny never had the courage to tell his father, the mans-man, that he wasn’t quite keen on girls as he would have hoped. That, in fact, he had his eye on some boys instead. He didn’t want to be the reason to disappoint his father and news like this, Danny was sure would break his heart.
“Son,” Mr. Miller spoke cautiously, as Danny hadn’t spoken in quite a few
minutes. “Are you okay?”
He took a deep breath, ready for once since he realized he truly was gay, to face his father with such news.
“Dad… I have to be honest.”
“You sound serious,” Mr. Miller said, setting
“This is serious. I uh…well, dad, I’m gay.” Danny held his breath as he watched his father’s face.
Many emotions shone through on Mr. Miller’s face and Danny instantly felt guilty. He didn’t want to stress his father out any more than he already was. He knew he shouldn’t have said anything. But then, Mr. Miller surprised Danny more than ever.
With a smile, he said, “So, do you have a boyfriend?”
Danny stood there shocked. “Not exactly? Well, I like him and I know he likes guys… it’s just weird because I’m not exactly open about it and don’t know how to approach him, you know?”
“Well son, I’m sure you’ll find a way. Be proud of who you are, though. There’s no need to hide it,” Mr. Miller spoke with conviction.
“Thanks dad.”
“No problem,” Mr. Miller said, finishing with the last dish. “I’m headed back to the office, though.” He turned to grab his jacket and head out the door, but with his hand on the knob, he looked back at Danny. “I love you, son.”
Danny smiled, “I love you too, dad.”
Will, being only six years old, was in the PeeWee football league their county had, while Danny, at seventeen, was one of the top track runners in not just the county, but the state. Even though their father pushed them into all the sports they played, they each found something exhilarating in the one sport they ended up sticking with. Danny especially loved running because he found himself frequently releasing all his problems from his mind as he ran, hearing only the wind in his ears and the clomping of his tennis shoes on the ground.
Family dinners were always tough in the Miller house. Dinner was usually under or over cooked and there was hardly ever a balance from the food pyramid. Usually, it was canned veggies and some form of meat. It wasn’t much, but the boys appreciated what their father could come up with.
After dinner, Danny would always help his father with clearing the table and assist in washing the dishes, while Will would pick out his clothes for the next day, shower, brush his teeth and get in bed, waiting for Danny to come tuck him in when he finished the dishes with their father, as Mr. Miller would promptly rush out the door to finish up another late night at the office.
Tonight was no different than any other, so as the boys finished eating their grilled steak and green beans, they placed their napkins on their plates, and each took them to the sink, stopping on their way to drop their napkin in the garbage.
“Will, go start your shower,” Danny instructed, as he started putting the leftover food in their respectable Ziploc containers, as their father began rinsing the dishes.
“Okay, Danny,” he said in his small voice, and headed down the hall to his room.
Danny moved to help his father in soaping up the dishes. They continued to discuss topics such as school, as well as what college applications Danny had finished up and which he still needed to complete.
“So you completed your applications to Arizona State, Azusa Pacific, UCLA and Oregon State?” Mr. Miller asked. His son nodded. “Which are the last you’re applying to?”
“San Diego State, University of Boston, and NYU,” he replied.
“Good job, son.”
Danny nodded his head in thanks.
“How are things at school? Any girls catch your eye lately? Are any worthy enough to call themselves your girlfriend?” Mr. Miller chuckled and nudged his son, not taking note of the slight wince Danny produced at his father’s words.
Danny never had the courage to tell his father, the mans-man, that he wasn’t quite keen on girls as he would have hoped. That, in fact, he had his eye on some boys instead. He didn’t want to be the reason to disappoint his father and news like this, Danny was sure would break his heart.
“Son,” Mr. Miller spoke cautiously, as Danny hadn’t spoken in quite a few
minutes. “Are you okay?”
He took a deep breath, ready for once since he realized he truly was gay, to face his father with such news.
“Dad… I have to be honest.”
“You sound serious,” Mr. Miller said, setting
“This is serious. I uh…well, dad, I’m gay.” Danny held his breath as he watched his father’s face.
Many emotions shone through on Mr. Miller’s face and Danny instantly felt guilty. He didn’t want to stress his father out any more than he already was. He knew he shouldn’t have said anything. But then, Mr. Miller surprised Danny more than ever.
With a smile, he said, “So, do you have a boyfriend?”
Danny stood there shocked. “Not exactly? Well, I like him and I know he likes guys… it’s just weird because I’m not exactly open about it and don’t know how to approach him, you know?”
“Well son, I’m sure you’ll find a way. Be proud of who you are, though. There’s no need to hide it,” Mr. Miller spoke with conviction.
“Thanks dad.”
“No problem,” Mr. Miller said, finishing with the last dish. “I’m headed back to the office, though.” He turned to grab his jacket and head out the door, but with his hand on the knob, he looked back at Danny. “I love you, son.”
Danny smiled, “I love you too, dad.”