Suffering Alone In Silence

Open POV

Another month passes where Frank continues to suffer in silence. He wasn’t conscious enough to be talked down and calmed, so everyone had to just watch him suffer. He was locked so far in his head that no one could reach out to him. When he was peacefully sleeping, Gerard would sit at his bedside, watching over him, whispering how much he loved him and how Gerard hoped that he was okay.

When the violent nightmares kicked in, Gerard would leave, not knowing if Frank’s now, dangerously little, body would make it through the episode. They couldn’t tube feed him due to the carnage he caused to himself during the violent nightmares. He would choke and splutter and throw up the tube. So everyone waited, to see if he would wake from this nightmare or just give up the fight and die. As much as it was horrible to think, it was a reality. Donna had made some vague arrangement, just as a precaution.

Frank’s body was re-living every beating. His body was in constant pain, the medication had to be stopped, so he could feel every punch, kick and rape. He could feel his bones break, time after time. He would scream in pain, and writhe around; just wishing he would die already. Inside his head he was very much awake, very much in pain, seeing his house. The different rooms, the shower cubicle, his bedroom, he could see it all.

His subconscious mind was telling him to walk away already, run away, and just keep running. He tried, many times, but couldn’t seem to get up. Another beating would follow this thought, and the pain would get worse every time.

Finally one day he could fight it anymore and just gave up. His heart rate slowed, and his breathing got lighter. His body stopped hurting, his dad disappeared, and everything seemed light. A bright light was shining through his eyelids and he thought that it was the light that people see when they die. Maybe god did think he was worthy of going to heaven.