Suffering Alone In Silence

Frank’s POV

My belongings barely filled a bag. My entire life had been packed in a black duffle bag. That was it. My clothes, books and CD’s had been packed in this bag. I didn’t even have my guitar anymore. No one said anything about my lack of belongings though. I was ready to go home in less than a few hours. I sat on the bed and just thought for a bit, though nothing in particular really got thought about.

“Frank?” A voice called out, from the doorway.

I looked up and saw Donna. She had a warm smile on her face and was leaning on the doorframe.

“Oh, uhm, hey,” I mumble.

“Hey, yourself. Are you ready to go?” She asked, with a small chuckle.

“Uh, yer, I suppose.” I reply, trying a smile.

“Come on then, Gerard and Mikey are waiting back at home.” She replied.

I nodded once, before jumping off the bed and grabbing my bag. Donna waited until I got to the doorframe, before pulling me in for a hug. It was a nice, warm, motherly hug, and it was gratefully returned.

“It’s so good to have you home, safe and sound,” She whispers in my ear.

I make a sound of agreement, and we release each other.

Without further delay, we head for the exit just beyond the nurses’ station. On my way past I stop and turn. I look between the nurses’ station and Donna.

“I uh, just wanna...you know...” I mumble, not sure that my words made sense.

“Wanna say goodbye?” Donna asks.

“Uh, yeah,” I reply shyly.

Donna walks up to the desk and asks if Mel is around and if we can speak to her quickly. We don’t wait long, before Mel comes rushing out of the door.

“Hey Frankie. Are you going home now?” She asks, cheerily.

“Uh, yeah. I just wanted to...y’know, say bye.” I reply.

“Oh, come here you.” She gushes, before pulling me into a tight embrace.

“We’ll get to see each other two times a week for at least the next six weeks.” She giggles.

“I know, but...” I mumble, trailing off.

“It’s cool, I’ll see you Monday.” She smiles, releases me and walks both Donna and I to the elevator.

“See ya, Frankie.” Mel says loudly as we get in the elevator.

I give a shy wave as the doors close and we descend down towards the lobby. Donna and I make our way over to her silver Lancer. I put my bag on the backseat and get into the front passenger side. It is silent as we put our seatbelts on and Donna starts driving.

“Donna?” I ask, quietly.

“Yes dear?” She replies, inquisitively.

“Are you...uhm...mad...at me?” I ask.

“Why would you think that?” She asks, exasperated.

“For...y’know...what happened last time.” I replied, quietly.

“Honey, listen to me will you. I mean everything I say, when I say that none of it was your fault and I am in no way mad at you or upset that it happened. I want to help you, and that is why I took guardianship of you. I want to protect you and love you unconditionally, like you should have been.” She rambles.

“Okay.” I reply, feeling silly.

“Frank, you will be happy. It may take time, but you will be happy, I will try my damned hardest to make that happen for you. Now what would you like for dinner? We can stop off somewhere or I can make you something when we get home.”

“Would it be alright if we had pizza? I haven’t had that since I was little.” I say.

“Pizza it is.” She responds with a smile.

Soon we have a meat pizza and a vege delight pizza and are heading towards home. We pull into the driveway and get out of the car. Donna takes the pizza and I get my bag from the backseat, before Donna locks the car and we head inside.

Gerard and Mikey greet me when I enter the house. I am bombarded with massive, bone breaking hugs and a few tears from Mikey. Mikey and I don’t let go for a long time, and when we do, it is because Donna has called us to the table to eat. Donna sits at the head of the table and Gerard and Mikey sit either side of me. For the first time I feel absolutely normal. It’s a cathartic feeling, and that makes me smile in content.