Suffering Alone In Silence

Frank’s POV

We had spent about an hour at the little diner, which was about 15 minutes away from where we lived. It seemed longer getting there than it did going home. I suppose that would be because we were talking. Gerard and I continued to talk while he drove us home.

We’re now sitting at the dining room table and Mikey is helping me with my school work that needs to be finished for the week. Gerard is sitting there distracting me by running his hands up and down my thigh. It feels strange and pleasurable, something that I wish he’d stop doing, because I haven’t had his touch on me in this way in a very long time, and its driving me mad.

“Gerard, stop, I’m trying to do my work, its gotta be done by the end of the week.” I complain to him.

He gives me a look, but stops his hand movements, his hand coming to rest on my knee. I give him a thank you look, and continue on with the English assignment that is due Friday. We continue to work on a variety of subjects and eventually I am all caught up from weeks ago.

“I’m going to go back to school and hand all my work in,” I tell both Gerard and Mikey.

“Are you sure that’s a good idea?” Mikey asks, looking between Gerard and me.

“It’s been quiet for two weeks since I got out of hospital. I am back on the good stuff and I’m not strung out. I think I’ll be okay.” I reason.

“You’ve been strung out?” Mikey questions looking bewildered.

“Okay you two need to talk, I’ll go put your books in your bag for you and talk to mom,” Gerard states, getting up and leaving.

Mikey watches him leave, eyes like a hawk. When Gerard is out of the room Mikey regards me.

“Explain.” He states.

“Okay, well the doctor who treated me took me off the stuff I was given when I was released and put me back on Xanax. He didn’t read my file, and I didn’t speak up. Mikey, please you have got to understand that what my mom did freaked me out and I wanted my old comfort back. That was why I spent all last week hiding in my room. That’s why I’ve been so freaked out.” I explain.

We sit in silence for a moment and Mikey takes a few deep breaths. He turns to stare at me; he’s looking to see if I’m lying. He knows, he always does; so when he sighs, I know he knows that I’m telling him everything.

“Does mom know?” He asks.

“Donna knows mostly all of it. Gerard explained a lot to her.” I answer.

“Okay. I was wondering what was up with you all week. I thought it was just you being you.” He sighs again, but it’s one of relief.

“I reckon the teachers will move you back to my grade by next semester. You’ve done well considering everything.” He changes the subject.

“Thanks Mikes.” I mumble leaning over to him.
We embrace in a hug for a few moments, before pulling away and smiling at each other.

Gerard returns shortly after, and he gives me a hopeful smile. I return it and give a small nod. Everything is okay again. Gerard come and sits next to me. He starts to rub my knee, and soon his hand is making its way up my leg. I am fully aware that we have not yet physically made up and it needs to be done, but I want to be the one in control for a while.
I’ve decided that I am not going to give in to Gerard’s wants. It will be so much better anyway when we do make up.

“Mikey, do you wanna go play video games?” I ask, turning to him, ignoring Gerard and his wandering hand.

“Sure, I wanna whip your ass in burnout,” He beams.

We get up and as I walk past Gerard I kiss him on the forehead. It’s a teasing move, and I watch as he pouts, but walk away anyway. I wander into the living room where Mikey has already set the game up. I take a seat next to him on the floor, and we start the game.

An hour goes by, and I watched as Gerard pouted and sauntered off to his room in a sulk. I know that I’ve done enough teasing but the temptation of one more round with Mikey is even more enticing. I’ve beat him three times out of five and I want to take the high score.

“One more round?” I ask Mikey.

“Okay, but only because I know how much joy winning has bought you.” He reasons.

We both laugh and we pick a new track and new cars. The game commences and we are making a dreadful racket and trying to put each other off. In the end Mikey loses and I take both the championship and the high score.

Suddenly Mikey’s phone rings and he answers. I can tell that it is Alicia, because Mikey’s demeanour has change to resemble that of a lovesick thirteen year old girl. He soon gets off the phone and turns to me with a smile.

“I’m going to go out with Alicia, you gonna be okay here with Mr. moody?” He asks, referring to Gerard.

“I’ll be perfectly fine, don’t sweat it.” I reply with a smile.

I watch as Mikey gets up and races to his room, coming back not one minute later with his wallet and keys, his phone tucked inside his jeans pocket.

“I’ll see you later, have fun,” He calls, as he leaves.