Suffering Alone In Silence

Frank’s POV

My hands are tangled in Gerard’s now dry hair. I pull gently at the handful of hair and I hear Gerard growl. He’s hungry for me, wants me to hurt him, but he will always be ever so gentle with me. My hands leave his hair and move down to the side of his head, down past his neck, his shoulders, down his arms and to the hem of his shirt, where I tease it between my fingers for a bit, before pulling it up. We separate for the brief second when I pull his shirt over his head, and when it’s gone Gerard buries his face in my neck and kisses and bites the skin. He moves about, carefully and purposefully searching out a weak point.

My guess is that he got impatient, because not a second later he has picked me up, me wrapping my legs around him, one of his hands under my bum, squeezing playfully while the other one is around my back holding me up carefully. He is carrying me back to the bed and I couldn’t agree more with where we were going. He dumps me roughly on the bed and I squeak out a laugh, before it turns into a moan and Gerard is rubbing me achingly slow.

“I love it when you moan like that,” he whispers in my ear, biting gently on my earlobe.

I moan in reply because Gerard is still rubbing me ever so slowly.

“How about I get you out of these pants?” He purrs once more in my ear.

“Y-yes, oh god...d-don’t s-stop,” I moan, trying to make myself understood.

“If you insist baby,” Gerard continues in that low sexy voice of his.

I feel him stop rubbing me, before releasing the button on my pants and dragging the zip down. Every movement is drawn out and every touch is articulate. I can feel the pressure being somewhat released as my pants are pulled down. I lift my hips slightly so Gerard can pull them all the way off, leaving me in my underwear.

I watch with lust filled eyes as Gerard stands over me on the bed, I watch with hunger as Gerard pops the button of his jeans and pulls the zip down. I gasp as his bare erection is exposed to me and let a smirk cross my face as I realise he isn’t wearing underwear. It makes me salivate and my need for him increases tenfold. I close my eyes and lick my lips knowing what is on offer and what is to come. When I open my eyes again, Gerard is still standing over me, but he is completely naked and is slowly pumping himself. He’s worked up enough that pre-come is leaking from the tip of him.

“Mmm, I want you so bad right now,” I mumble, not sure if Gerard has heard me.

He must have heard me because he drops to his knees and his hand begins to rub over my erection that is still hidden behind my boxers. He looks down at what he’s doing and a smirk crosses his face. He can see my erection peeking out the top of my boxers, and has realised how hard I truly am.

“These boxers are pissing me off,” He mumbles against my lips before kissing me roughly.

I lift my hips and Gerard pulls them off, while still kissing me. He gets them down as far as my knees and I shrug them off from there. From there Gerard rubs himself against me, causing unbelievable pleasure to course through me.

“I want you so bad right now,” I mumble before kissing him again, our tongues fighting against each other.

“I wanna ride you so bad,” Gerard responds, moving to kiss down my neck and over my collarbone.

“Oh god,” I moan, feeling Gerard’s hand wrap around me tightly, and realising what he just said all at once.

“I can be your god,” Gerard smirks at me.

“Hurry up,” I whine out, now feeling ready to explode.

Without another word, Gerard’s hand stops at the base of my erection and he gently squeezes it. He’s still kissing me as he rubs my erection against his ass. I moan into the kiss and raise my hips, forcing my tip inside him. Gerard moans at the intrusion, but soon impales himself on me. The sudden rush of pleasure that courses through me is so intense that I see nothing but white hot pleasure.

Gerard is sitting at full height and I take the time to run my hands up his thighs and to his erection, slowly pumping him with a loose grip. I feel his thighs quiver and he leans down and puts his arms beside my head. I move my other hand to his hip and guide him up. He stays in the raised position for a moment before slamming himself down onto me so hard that a quick surge of dull pain courses up from my hips.

“Baby, not so hard,” I mutter through a moan.

“Sorry,” comes his breathy reply.

We continue like this for a while, the pleasure feeling unbelievable. Gerard is riding me so quickly that I only feel the heat of him for brief moments, and it’s not enough.

“Babe, stop for a second,” I mutter, praying that myself control keeps me composed enough
to change positions.

“What’s wrong? Did I hurt you?” He moans, getting off me and rubbing my hips.

“No, change positions,” I mutter once more, rolling off the bed.

Gerard follows my lead and I kiss him roughly and push him against the wall, his back to the wall.
Gerard wraps a leg around me and I quickly slide back into his heat, starting a slower rhythm. I start working my way in and out of him, feeling the heat of him for longer, thus gaining more pleasure.

“Oh god, right t-there...fuck!” Gerard suddenly screams.

“You like that huh, like me shoving myself into you like this,” I moan in his ear.

“Fuck, mmm, yes I do,” He replies.

I can feel his legs start to quiver slightly and take this as a sign to hurry the fuck up because he won’t be able to hold on much longer. I start to ram myself into his ass at a ravaging pace and I can feel him start to quiver even more.

Suddenly I blank out, I have my eyes closed and all I can see is the flashbacks from my childhood. I stop all actions and feel nothing but the fear of the beatings, the hurt from the rapes, everything is heightened.
I vaguely hear Gerard moan, and feel his release before my body kicks back in and I scream bloody murder. I pull out and away from Gerard, my eye’s now open so wide with fear and I run to the bathroom, locking the door. I cry out and I can feel everything, the pain, the pleasure everything, my body in overdrive.

In a vague attempt to rid myself of the overdrive of feeling, I turn the water on and sit under the cool stream of the water. I sob into my arms that are folded on top of my knees.

“Frankie, baby, let me in!” I hear Gerard through the door.

“No!” I cry out, feeling totally horrible, but unable to stop everything swirling through my body.

“Frankie, Mikey is here, will you let him in?” Gerard yells through the door.

“No!” I scream again, before screaming in agony, the feelings in my body intensifying.

'Please just let me pass out right now', I think to myself before curling into a ball and closing my eyes, still sobbing.