Price Check On Monogamy

"Tandem, are you ready?"

Tandem was a total wreck. He hadn't slept all night. Somehow, he'd known that he wouldn't get a phone call, but it still broke his heart when he... well, he didn't get a phone call. He didn't get anything. He'd been making excuses as to why she wouldn't have seen everything in his head all night-- maybe she hadn't gone home. Maybe Caleb hadn't been able to finish it in time.

Or maybe she'd tossed it all once she read that it was from him.

Either way, he'd stared out his window almost the entire night-- apparently, up until Caleb had come over to his house.

"Tandem, you need to go to school," Caleb grabbed his arm and tugged him back away from his window. "This is getting ridiculous. You have graduation rehearsals today."

Panic seized Tandem's heart violently all of a sudden; it was like he couldn't breath. "What if I graduate--"

Caleb grabbed Tandem roughly by the shoulders and looked him dead in the eye. "Tandem. I need you to listen to me right now. If she could forgive me, she could forgive you." Caleb glanced away from him for a split second. "You don't know everything, Tandem. There's some shit that I shouldn't be the one to tell you. But you don't know everything. So you need to trust me when I say that if she could forgive me, she can forgive you."

Tandem broke eye contact, and had he had more strength, he would have broken Caleb's grip on his shoulders, too. "You're her brother. You were her best friend for years. Regardless of how much happened between you two, she always loved you. I can't compete with that, Caleb. I'm just--"

"Some asshole that broke her heart, yeah, yeah, I heard that," Caleb snapped. The force of it was enough to make Tandem focus on him again. "So what? You're content with just being the asshole that broke her heart for the rest of her life?"

"She hasn't tried to talk to me!" Tandem almost shouted. "I did try! Dammit, you can't even know how hard I tried!"

Caleb rolled his eyes. "Except I do know. I was the one that set everything up, remember? I didn't tell you to try again. I asked if you were content. Obviously, you aren't content. So don't lose hope yet, alright? It's only been a day, and Tiger manages to get dragged into some pretty nasty shit. If it takes her some time, it takes her some time, Tandem. Just give it time."

Tandem sighed and sat down on his bed, dropping his head to his hands. "I told her I loved her, Caleb," he said quietly. If Caleb was so set on being optimistic, maybe he shine a little light on the truth that Tandem had been denying for so long. "What if I scared her away?"

Caleb sighed and sat down next to his best friend. "Tiger's afraid of love, alright. But never, not once in her life, have I known her to run away from something that scared her. She runs from things that make her sad, because if something makes her sad, it means that, somewhere, deep down, she was never expecting it to happen. When we were five, she left class and cried when someone told her the polar bears were dying. Why? Because her little five year old mind just couldn't fathom the idea that polar bears were out there somewhere, dying. She ran a couple months ago from the boy she was falling for kissing one of her best friends. Why? Because, deep down, she never could've fathomed herself falling for the sort of boy that would kiss her best friend." Caleb was silent for so long after that, that Tandem actually turned to him, his face bland.

"I'm waiting for something that's not going to make me feel like shit, Caleb."

Caleb shoved him with his shoulder. "When something makes her scared, she stands her ground because fear is something she can understand. Fear is a lot more tangible than sadness, and if she's afraid, it means that somewhere, deep down, she has expectations. She stands her ground because she needs to prove those expectations either right or wrong and delete the fear from her life. Get it? When we were nine, she broke her arm when she jumped off the ledge under her window because she was afraid of heights. She hates heights now, but they don't scare her. Why? Because she had the expectation that it would hurt her eventually, and she feels like she's already paid her dues. Her broken arm was like a testament to the fact that she was right, and being right was like a testament to why it was okay to skip over fear and go straight to hate." Caleb paused again, turned to look at Tandem. "Is any of this making any sense to you?"

Tandem nodded slowly. "Yeah. It makes sense, but I still don't see how it relates to how I might have scared her away. What if she was afraid of love and this is just justification to give up on it?"

Caleb rolled his eyes and shook his head. "No, you don't get it. Love is something that's scary, but loving someone you don't want to love and finding out they love you back, too, is even scarier."

Tandem's head snapped up. "You think she loves me?"

Caleb studied Tandem for a second before standing up. "Get dressed, Tandem."

"You can't--"

"Tandem, I'm not helping you throw your graduation chances out the window by helping you continue to dwell on this. Get dressed, I'm taking you to rehearsal."

- - -

"Tiger!"

I groaned and turned over in bed, shoving my head under a pillow. I didn't want to face the world. When I grabbed the glass thing poking me in the side and remembered everything that had happened the night before, I groaned even louder-- school and facing Tyler.

Maybe I could just stay in bed really quietly--

"Tiger, come on!"

-- or maybe I could be a big girl and go face it now.

Sighing and getting out of bed, I got ready quickly, attempting to brush my hair and my teeth at the same time. It didn't work, though. Just saying.

"Tiger!"

"Tyler, I'll be out in a second!" I shouted back, pulling on my shirt fast and almost running out of my room. Skipping down the stairs, I opened the door right before he got the chance to yell again. "Okay, what's up?"

Tyler smiled shakily at me and hugged me fast. "I just need to talk to you."

Pulling away from him gently, I looked at him, an eyebrow raised. "You need to talk to me?"

Tyler bit his lip and shoved his hands into his pockets. "I told you about everything that was going on with my mom," he said quietly, staring at the ground. "And, umm, I told you about my grandma."

"Yes?" I said slowly. This really wasn't making any sense to me-- but it wasn't so much what he was saying that wasn't making sense as it was the fact that I really didn't care. I wanted to go back to sleep. I wanted to forget my issues.

And, self as it was... I had enough of my own issues to forget; I didn't need him adding all of his to mine, too.

Tyler grabbed my shoulders all of a sudden and looked me in the eye. "I don't know how to say this, but my entire family is moving back to England. My dad decided he still loved my mom and they want to be together-- but she isn't willing to leave her mother alone."

"So you're... moving?" I asked quietly. Tyler, tears in his eyes, nodded.

"Yes... I'm so sorry, Tiger," He crushed me into himself tightly again.

"It's fine, Tyler, it's not your fault," I hugged him back loosely; I couldn't really feel anything. Maybe Tyler did mean that much to me-- maybe I was numb over the loss. "You gotta do what you gotta do. Don't apologize for that."

Tyler held me back shakily. "But, about us..."

I smiled and patted Tyler on the cheek. "Don't worry about me, Tyler. I totally understand. Long distance is one thing, but you'd be half way around the world. It's totally fine."

Tyler blinked and... laughed. Laughed? "I'm not breaking up with you, Tiger!"

... seriously?

Tyler hugged me again and kept laughing. "Wow, no, it's nothing like that. I wanted you to know that I was leaving, but... look, you don't have any plans for the summer, right?"

"No," I said slowly.

"Well, that's perfect! Come up to England with me!"

I blinked-- it was all I could muster. "You want me to go to England with you for the summer?"

Tyler beamed. "Yeah! There's so many places that I want to show you! You'll love it, Tiger, I swear! It's gonna be a hell of a trip, I know it!" Tyler laughed again and shook his head. "Break up with you. I'd never break up with you, Tiger." Grabbing me and kissing me on the cheek, he said softly, "I love you, Tiger. I really love you."