I Will Follow You Into the Dark

Aurora stormed out of the chamber, completely ignoring her mother’s hysteric cries and the questioning looks that her roommates were throwing her way. Aurora needed to get out. She needed to be somewhere where she’d be able to escape the prying eyes of her fellow classmates, but most importantly, she needed to be somewhere where people wouldn’t be able to see just how much of an emotional mess she was.

Whispers erupted in the common room when Aurora entered it, but instead of snapping at them as she would have done in another occasion, she decided to ignore them and continue on her way.

When Aurora finally left the confines of the castle, a small smile broke upon her face, but the smile was short lived for she remembered everything that had happened, her reckless behavior, the disrespectful words, and as she remembered them she couldn’t help but be ashamed of herself for, once again, letting her emotions take over.

Aurora had never been good with dealing with her emotions, even before her father died she had been bad at handling them, opting to force herself to act happy at all hours of the day just so she could avoid dealing with negative emotions.

As Aurora stood there she began imagining the yelling that her grandparents were going to give her when they found out how she had treated her mother. They were going to be furious with her, they were surely going to punish her in some form and she hoped that they wouldn’t ban her from visiting during winter break because if they did that, she would fall apart, that was the one thing she had to look forward to.

“You’ve fucking ruined everything, I hope you’re happy with yourself,” muttered Aurora angrily to herself. “Now you’re not going to be able to spend the break with your grandparents and are going to have to spend it in some shitty little hotel since you’re too fucking stubborn to apologize to your mom again.”

Realizing how crazy she looked talking to herself, Aurora decided to start running. Where to? She didn’t know. All she knew was that she had to get to a place where she would go unseen by others, a place where she would be able to cry until her tear glands refused to cooperate.

Aurora started running towards the Forbidden Forest, deciding that it would be the best place for her to lay low for awhile. No one would think to look for her there, well, Hannah would but Hannah wouldn’t dare go into the Forbidden Forest by herself. She wasn’t particularly skilled when it came to magical plants.

Aurora’s legs carried her to her sanctuary where her marijuana plant grew but when Aurora saw the plant she was disgusted with herself for considering numbing the pain again. Numbing the pain was what had gotten her into the mess. What she needed to do was confront the pain, although, that confrontation would have to happen on another day. She wasn’t in the mood to have to deal with her emotions.

In silence she made her way to another part of the forest, a part that was near the lake but far enough from it so that she wouldn’t be seen by students that were spending their afternoon there.

For two hours, Aurora sat hidden by the thick shrubbery.

Her mind raced with millions of thoughts, she had so many questions that needed to be answered, so many conversations that had to be had but she was afraid of reaching out to anyone. She didn’t want to tell Hannah out of fear of Hannah letting something slip to her mother. She didn’t want to tell her brother because he was angry at her and, although she was tempted, she couldn’t tell Bill because she was afraid that he would think of her as nothing more than a child that needed to be looked after and Aurora didn’t want him to think of her like that.

Aurora was taken from her thoughts when a nearby twig snapped. She quickly turned around, wand raised high, to see who it was that was near her and when she saw Harry standing there with a look of fear on his face, she lowered her wand.

“What are you doing here?” asked Aurora gruffly.

“I-I was looking for you,” admitted Harry embarrassedly.

“Me?” Auror sniffled. “Why were you looking for me?”

“Because I heard that you weren’t feeling all that good so I wanted to offer my company.”

“Oh . . . thanks, I guess, but I'm fine.” Aurora lied.

“No, you’re not, I can see that you’re hurting and I just want to let you know that that’s normal, everyone hurts and you don’t have to hide. No one’s going to hate you for being human and showing that you’re not perfect.”

Aurora remained silent.

“And even though you’re not perfect, I know that there are people that would still want to be like you.” Harry paused briefly before adding, “I want to be like you.”

Aurora laughed bitterly. “Don’t waste your time wanting to be like me, it’s not worth it.”

“What do you mean? You’re always so strong and you know so many spells. I can’t imagine what would be horrible about being like you . . .”

“Let me tell you what would be wrong,” Aurora’s nostrils flared. “If you were like me, then you would be very fit, you would be well versed in defensive spells but you would be miserable. You would be an emotional wreck that’s incapable of dealing with emotions because whenever you’d start trying to sort them out, you’d give up because those emotions would make you feel weak and by giving up you’d think that you’re stronger, but that’s not true because only cowards don’t deal with their emotions and that’s what I am . . . a coward.”

Harry remained silent.

“But you, Harry, you’re brave.”

“No, I'm not,” Harry hung his head in shame.

“Yes, you are,” Aurora lifted his chin so that his gaze met hers. “You’re a very brave person Harry, but you aren’t just brave, you’re a good person that cares more about the people he loves than he cares about his own life and that . . . that is powerful stuff. It’s that love that’s going to carry you through the challenges up ahead.”

“But how can love do any of that?” asked a skeptical Harry.

“I honestly don’t know, but I know that it’ll work, love always works.”

“That can’t be true though, I mean, love isn’t tangible. How can it help me if I can’t see or feel it?”

“You can feel it,” Aurora wiped some fallen tears. “Love can always be felt and you have a lot of people that love you, a lot of people that support you and I may not be the best with emotions but I'm going to support you through whatever comes your way. In me, you’ll always have a friend that’ll lay down their life if need be.”

“Aurora, you don’t have to promise that.” Harry was shocked by her words.

“I do,” Aurora took his hand in hers. “You need to know that someone’s going to always be there for you, that there’s going to be at least one person that won’t turn their backs on you and will fight at your side and I want to be that person. I feel like my entire life has been leading up to doing this.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean that all the training I did as a child was meant to prepare me to help prepare you, if that makes any sense.”

“It does.” Harry stared at their entwined hands. “And I'm really grateful for having you in my life. You may not be good with emotions but having you around soothes me.”

“It does?” Aurora cocked her brow.

Harry nodded. “I think it’s because you’re always so on guard that I think that if anything bad happens, you can take care of it and keep everyone safe. Bloody hell, that probably sounds very strange to you.”

“That doesn’t strange,” Aurora patted his hand. “It’s nice to know that I can be of use.”

Aurora breathed in deeply before standing up from her place on the grass. She stretched out slowly, rubbing her tired calves in preparation of the walk back to Gryffindor Tower.

“Hey, Harry, would you mind not . . .”

“I won’t tell anyone,” responded Harry before Aurora had finished speaking. “This will be our secret but . . . if you ever want to talk to someone about these things, just know that I'm here.”

“That’s sweet but you have enough to deal with.”

“And I have help, help from people that motivate me to keep going and to be better than I already am so I think, that you also need help, so you can be better than you already are.”

Aurora was startled by how bold Harry had been with his choice of words but she knew that he was right. She always told him that he had to be better than he already was so it was only right that she also strived to better herself, to make herself into a better person, a better rounded human being.

“Alright,” Aurora couldn’t believe that she was accepting his help.

“Really?” he was astonished.

“Yes, really,” Aurora chuckled softly. “I think we should head back now, it’s almost dinnertime.”

The walk back was uneventful.

Dinner, for the most part, was also uneventful. Aurora simply sat beside Hannah and pretended to listen to the conversation that Hannah was having with the twins. The content of the conversation, from what Aurora had managed to listen to, revolved around the importance of being committed to a lie when trying to get out of class.

When dinner ended they began the walk back to Gryffindor tower.

Aurora made her way up to the dorm in silence, wanting to fall asleep before the teenage girls arrived in the dorm and started pestering her with questions but when she arrived in her room and saw a familiar snow white owl waiting for her on her bed.

“Hello Morrison,” greeted Aurora warmly.

Morrison hooted in response.

“Do you have a letter for me?” asked Aurora.

Morrison flew to her, nudging her with its beak so that she would see the letter.

Skillfully, Aurora untied the letter and began reading it.

Aurora,

Sorry for the late note but I was wondering if you, perhaps, wanted to join me for a Radiohead concert that’s happening on Friday. I know that you don’t have permission to leave, but it’s bloody Radiohead playing in Paris and I thought that maybe you’d be willing to sneak out since you like them so much.

Hope all is well,

William

Aurora smiled softly as she pulled out a piece of parchment and began scribbling away on it. Radiohead in Paris with Bill sounded lovely to her.