Too Late For Forever

Faces everywhere. Excited faces, cheerful faces, laughing faces, happy faces, all surrounded me, taunting me. I glanced around the bleak cafeteria, looking anywhere but his eyes so close to mine. My eyes desperately searched from face to face, carefully examining each facial expression and reading body language, trying to understand. Were all these people truly happy? Truly laughing? Could I really see the whole picture with just a glance or could I just see what I chose to see?
I looked down at the table, his large hand enveloping mine and I felt my heart begin to crumble. I had to get away. I needed to get away. A loud giggle cut through my jumbled thoughts and I looked up, my gaze stopping on a couple sitting at the table across from us. A painful lump rose in my throat as I watched the girl laugh with a smile so bright, I thought I would go blind. My eyes followed the boy's hand as it crept up the girl's pretty face, caressing her cheek. She flushed an endearing shade of red and I looked away. They seemed so happy, so in love and I couldn't stop the envious cloud that settled above me. I wondered if Daniel and I posed the same impression as this couple? His hand lightly brushed the hair out of my face and he leaned closer and whispered something into my ear. I realized that on first glance we must have looked like a couple in love. The slouched way in which Danny sat, as if he had been beaten with sticks, the way his lips trembled as he spoke said otherwise. For more conviction you could have looked at me and guessed. My eyes were downcast though my back was tense and in an awkward upright position, straighter than a ruler itself. Then again who needed the guessing game when our actions clearly spoke for themselves.
“A-are you ...okay?” Danny stuttered, and I could tell he was struggling to look me in the eye, “...um...yeah?” I half whispered. I felt my attention shift to the couple across again, thinking how Daniel and I had once been like that. Once. When had we become this? Or better yet, when had he stopped loving me? I looked down again unable to bare it anymore. Daniel trailed his finger across my jaw, lifting my chin, until I gave up and met his pleading gaze. Maybe this was a joke. A cruel horrible joke that we would both laugh at in a few seconds. I searched his face for any signs of suppressed laughter but the harder I searched, was the more painful the lump in my throat became as I realized that this was no joke. The tears behind my eyes chose that moment to fall, trembling their way down my cheek and onto the table. My eyes closed as he leaned over, kissing my tears as they fell and I couldn't breathe. “know the best cure for tears?” came Daniel's weak voice in an attempt to lighten the mood in a phrase he must have said a thousand times in the past. “...w-what?” I managed to mumble though knowing the answer all too well , “A k-kiss...,” Daniel smiled and kissed my cheek. “One kiss for e-very ...,” more tears fell from my eyes, “...tear,” he finished as he kissed my left cheek, forehead, my nose, and I let him continue until I felt a light brush of his lips on mine. In that moment, I felt my world, along with my heart, shatter to a million hideous pieces. Now I desperately needed to leave. Why was he doing this to me? If he was breaking up with me, he should have just done it and left me alone. Couldn't we have just fought and be done with it like normal people? He was making this harder than it had to be, being all gentle, holding my hands...kissing me... I was starting to get slightly dizzy, and the tears blurring my eyes did nothing to help. I reluctantly pulled away from his warm lips and wrenched my hands out of his a little harsher than necessary. Unsuccessfully, I attempted to stand up with as much grace as I could muster, for dignity's sake. One by one I put one foot in front of the other unsteadily, not knowing what was going on, or even where I was going. All I knew was that I could not be here. I was feeling a little too clumsy as if my head was too big for my body. In the background I could hear the noise of the cafeteria and above it all, Danny's voice though I could barely comprehend what he was saying. I felt as if my chest was constricting and I couldn't breathe. Everything seemed to be moving in slow motion, yet too fast at the same time and I felt my knees buckle under my weight. Suddenly all I could taste was linoleum and dust as a dark mist covered me, consuming me in a thick haze...