Crash Into My Arms

“Why bother?” Gerard chuckled as I pulled my brush through my chocolate brown hair; it’d been matted in my sleep.
“I gotta drop by home first.” I replied. “I have to make it look like I’ve been to school, plus I gotta drop off my schoolbag.”
“You live next door.” He laughed.
“And I have to ask Mum if it’s okay for me to have dinner here with you guys.”
“Just call her.”
“Gee, shut up.” I giggled, getting up and swinging my schoolbag over my shoulders.
“Can I come with you?”
“Why?”
“I dunno.” He shrugged.
“You’re afraid she’s gonna yell at me again, aren’t you?”
He gave me a look that told me I was right.
“Okay.”

The two of us left the room and walked out the front door of his house. We jumped the low fence and walked up to my front porch, where I rang the doorbell. A few moments passed by and I heard someone unlocking the chain lock on the back of the door.

My mother appeared, her face holding the usual disgusted expression at the sight of me. “You’re awfully late home.”
“That’s my fault.” Gerard cut in. “I asked her to accompany me while I ran an errand for Ma.”
“And you are?”
“Gerard, I moved in next door yesterday.”
“Oh, that was your family?” Mum raised an eyebrow; seemingly unimpressed that something she’d intended to be a punishment for me yesterday had turned into something positive.
“Yeah, Ma invited Miseria over for dinner.” He smiled. “Is that okay?”
“Do you have homework?” Mum asked me.
“Not today.”
“Get in, make your lunch for school, and set out your uniform for tomorrow.” She opened the door. “Then you can go, and be home by no later than 8:30, kid.” She said sternly.

I nodded to show I understood, and entered the house. When I reached the hallway, I turned back to see if Gerard was following, and saw my Mum roll her eyes and hold the door open for him. He walked inside and followed me to my room, where I opened the door and walked over to my bed, dumping my bag on it.

As I unzipped my bag and pulled out my lunchbox, Gerard picked up something on my bedside table. I left my room and walked out to the kitchen, where I set about making my lunch for the next school day. When I was done, I walked back into my room and closed the door. As I turned around, I noticed what Gerard was holding; the photo of my father.

“Who’s this?” he asked.
“My Dad.”
“You look just like him.”
“Hmm.” I frowned, going over to my drawers and pulling out a thin blue Superman hoodie.
“Can I ask what happened?”
“It was three years ago…” I said, pulling out a pair of black tracksuit pants. “He died of Emphysema.”
“I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be.” I said, turning to face him. “People die, it’s just life.”
“You were close to him, weren’t you?”
“He was my best friend, we did everything together.” I felt tears threaten at the corner of my eyes, and leant against the surface of my dressing table, hanging my head to hide it. I let out a quiet sniffle.
“Are you crying?”
“No.” I choked out, wiping my eyes. “Aw, fuck.” I groaned, noticing I’d gotten eyeliner on my sleeve. “Looks like I’ve got washing to do.”
“Bring it with you.” He said. “I’ll wash it, and if I toss it in the dryer straight after, it’ll be done before you have to go home.”
“You’re not my slave, Gee.” I objected. “I’m not making you do my washing.”
“Will you stop objecting every time I offer to do something nice for you?” he laughed, getting up from my bed and hugging me. “What are friends for?”
“Alright.” I rolled my eyes. “Fine.”
“Thank you?”
I rolled my eyes again. “Thank you, Gerard.”
“Manners, Missy.”
“Alright, you.” I pulled away from him. “I gotta get changed, get out of my room.”
“As you wish.” He smiled, and left the room.

I closed the door after him and locked it, before turning and flopping down on my bed. Out of nowhere, I started laughing; I covered my face, feeling like a dork. This emotion was alien to me; I hadn’t felt it in so long. Happiness, I was actually happy, for the first time in three years.

I hauled myself up off my bed, not wanting to take too long and have Gerard wonder what the hell I was doing in here, and got changed. I pulled my brush through my hair again, tidying it up from being messed up when I’d pulled my jumper on.

My makeup seemed to still be in tact, but I decided that rather than leave it until later, I’d clean it off now, and so wiped at it with my makeup removal wipes. I didn’t recognize myself without the heavy black eyeshadow and eyeliner that I wore everyday. I looked different, younger.

“Come on, woman!” I heard Gerard’s voice from behind my door.
“Alright, alright.” I laughed, picking up my eyeliner stained top and opening the door. “We can go.”

As the two of us headed for the door, I heard the doorbell ring. Mum came out of her room and opened it, my heart sank; it was Burke. He stepped through the doorway, his appearance as frightening as always. To the normal person, he would seem like any other old man, his long grey hair and beard, out of date clothes, his weight. But to me, someone who knew the nasty temper he possessed, he was terrifying.

He looked in my direction as he passed through the doorway, his eyes immediately darting to Gerard. He didn’t look too impressed to see another male in the house, even while Burke came and went as he pleased, he considered himself the only man allowed into the house. But he wasn’t a man to me, he was a monster.

“Who the bloody hell are you?” his English accent snapped at Gerard.
“Gerard Way, sir.”
“Are you my step daughter’s boyfriend?”
My hands balled into fists. “I am not your step daughter.” I growled. “Not until the day you and my mother get married, a day I hope never comes, you ape!”
“Miseria!” Mum snapped. “That’s enough!” she pushed the door open. “Go!”
“With pleasure.” I spoke through gritted teeth, taking Gerard’s hand and leaving the house.

We jumped the fence again, and went back inside Gerard’s house. I sat down on the couch in the lounge room, trying to keep my anger at bay. Every time I saw Burke, I was overcome by rage, and it took everything I had to keep it contained, and not kill him right there and then.

“What was that all about?” Gerard asked me.
“I hate him.”
“Why?”
“He’s a monster.” I growled. “He destroyed everything between me and Ma.” I looked down at my hands. “He threatens me sometimes… and he beats my mother.”
“Are you serious?” Gerard gasped.
“Yup.” I replied, popping the “p”
“And she still stays with him?”
“Uhuh, she’s too fucking weak, too afraid of being alone.”
Gerard came to sit beside me, and slid his arm around me.
“She thinks that if she breaks up with him, she’ll never find anyone else, and she’ll die alone.”
“That couldn’t be more wrong.”
“You tell her that, if she listens, I’ll give you a thousand dollars.” I laughed without humor. “She’ll never learn.” I sniffled. “Ever since Dad died…”
He put a finger to my lips and silenced me. “No more of that.” He shook his head. “It only upsets you.” He pulled me into his arms and hugged me tight.

I heard knocking on wood and looked over Gerard’s shoulder to see Donna standing in the doorway.

“Am I interrupting something?” she smiled.
“No.” I sniffled, wiping my eyes and pulling away from Gerard. “It’s okay.”
“I just wanted to let you kids know dinner’s ready.”
“Thanks, Ma, we’ll be out there in a second.” Said Gerard, and Donna left.

He turned back to me, and gave me the smile that always made me feel better, and wiped the tears from my eyes. We sat in silence for a few moments, my hands in his as he stroked them comfortingly, patiently waiting for me to compose myself. I nodded when I felt okay enough to go out to the dining room, and he helped me up off the couch.

Donna looked up from the table when I entered the room. “You okay, sweetie?”
“Yeah, Mrs. Way.”
“Honey.” She giggled. “Please, call me Donna.”
“Sorry.” I smiled shyly. “Donna.”

Donna and Donald sat opposite each other at both ends of the table, and Mikey sat to the side. Gerard and I walked around to the other side and took up the two unoccupied seats. Our dinner had already been laid out; Spaghetti and Meatballs, my absolute favourite.

“So boys.” Donald spoke as he began to eat his meal. “How’s school?”
“Great.” Mikey smiled. “I’ve already made a really great friend.”
Gerard and I exchanged small smiles, we had already noticed the chemistry building between Mikey and Alicia.
“Oh really?” said Donald, raising an eyebrow in interest.
“Yeah, her name’s Alicia.”
“Oh, it’s a girl is it?” Donna piped up, her face holding a pleased smile.
“Y-yeah.” Mikey spoke shyly, hiding behind his fringe a little.
“You should invite her over sometime, I’d love to meet her.” His mother said.
“We’ll see.”
“You should, Mikes.” Gerard chimed in. “Hey, Ma, do you remember Raymond?”
“From Belleville kindergarten?”
“Yeah.”
“Of course I remember him, with the curly hair; he was such a sweet little boy.”
“He’s at Newark High.” Gerard grinned.
“Wait.” I cut in. “You knew him when you were younger?”
“Oh yes.” Donna giggled. “Never saw one without the other, they were inseparable.”
“I remember.” smiled Donald. “So I guess that means his father’s not working at the post office anymore?”
“Nah.” Gerard replied. “He opened up a music shop.”
“Oh really?”
“Yeah, Ray plays guitar now.”
“Does he?” asked Donna.
“Yeah, you should see him, Ma, he’s friggin incredible!”
“Michael, are you still wanting to start that band, what was the name…” Donald thought on it a moment, twisting noodles around his fork.
“My Chemical Romance?” Mikey said.
“Yes, that’s the one.” His father smiled.
“Yeah, I’ll never stop wanting to.”
“Maybe you should ask Raymond to play guitar.”
“Sorry to interrupt.” I cut in. “But Mikey, I just have to say, that’s an amazing band name, how’d you come up with that?”
“It was a few years ago.” Gerard spoke. “Mikey and I were working at a Barnes and Noble together.”
“Hey, asswipe, I got you the job.”
“Michael, language!” Donna snapped.
“Sorry, Ma.” Mikey apologized.
“Yes, he did.” Gerard continued. “I worked in music, he worked in books.”
“And the manager and I were really into Irvine Welsh’s books.” Mikey added. “During a break one day, I brought a bunch of his novels into the back room and we got talking about what each book was about.”
“And Mikey picked up a copy of Ecstasy: Three Tales Of Chemical Romance.”
“The title just kind of struck me, and I was really shocked nobody had thought to use it in a band name before.” Mikey explained.
“He just kinda said “Wouldn’t it be cool if you put a “My” in front of that? Made it My Chemical Romance?” and I thought it wasn’t a bad idea.”
“I already wanted to form a band; I had since I saw my first Smashing Pumpkins show.”
“He didn’t shut up about it for a week.” Gerard muttered to me, quietly enough for Mikey not to hear.
“So I thought that when I finally did, that had to be the name.” Mikey smiled.
“That’s so cool.” I smiled back at him. “Wish I’d thought of that, I might have to pinch that book off you sometime, I’m a massive reader.”
“I have it in my room; I’ll lend it to you if you want?”
“Yeah, just wait awhile, I’m in the middle of a book at the moment.”
“Oh yeah?” Mikey swallowed his mouthful. “What book?”
“Fallen, it’s about a girl who falls in love with a Fallen Angel, and like, she’s lived countless times before, each time she’s reincarnated, every seventeen years she meets Daniel, and then dies.” I explained. “Only this time, she hasn’t died for some reason.”
“Sounds interesting.” Donna chimed in. “I think I might have to grab a copy of that for myself, I wouldn’t mind reading it.”
“It’s really good.” I smiled. “I’m already addicted to it, but I’m not into Daniel, there’s another Fallen Angel, his name’s Cam, I like him more.” I giggled. “He’s the evil one.” Cam reminded me of Gerard, and I imagined him as Gerard when I read it.
Donna laughed.
“I love Vampire books too.”
“Oh god.” Gerard groaned. “You’re not into fucking Twilight are you?”
“Oh, hell no!” I laughed.
“Good.” He smiled.
“So Miseria.” Donna spoke once again. “Tell me about yourself.”
“Oh.” I was slightly taken aback by her sudden interest in me. “Umm.”
“Do you have any siblings?” she asked.
“No, I’m an only child.”
“Oh, is that right?”
“Yeah, and I live with my mother.”
“Where’s your father?” she actually sounded concerned.
“He died a few years ago.” I spoke, my voice considerably quieter.
“I’m sorry.” She gave me a sympathetic look.
“It’s alright.” I forced a weak smile.

I felt Gerard grab my hand under the table, and give it a squeeze. I looked at him, and he gave me a weak smile of his own…