Crash Into My Arms

The hot afternoon quickly became cold and I smiled to myself;

Now that’s my kinda weather.

I shrugged on my trench coat once more, having previously removed my school shirt after I’d left the school grounds. There were more than likely truancy officers driving around, but they couldn’t take me in if I wasn’t in my school uniform. For all they knew; I could be a TAFE student on a lunch break.

I walked down to the local shopping centre; it wasn’t exactly all that great, more for quick stop purposes than anything. Full of grocery stores, a discount music store, a butcher’s and a bakery. I snatched up some free samples as I passed the butcher’s and bakery, I was ravenously hungry.

I passed out of the centre, and kept walking until I reached the local youth centre, where they had some pretty decent computers. There was another youth centre nearby, but they didn’t let kids use their computers during school hours like this one did, unless it was for schoolwork. I pushed the door open and walked inside.

“Ahh, hello again, Miseria.” The receptionist smiled from behind the desk.
“Hello.” I flashed a quick smile, I wasn’t too big a smiler these days.
“Computers?”
“Yeah.” I nodded, they knew me too well.
“Go ahead, you can use them till 4 if you like?”
“Oh no, that’s okay, I’ll leave at 3:05.”
“Sure thing.” She smiled.

I sat down in front of one of the two computers and signed into MSN as Offline, blocked anyone who would tell my mother I was wagging, and then set my status to Online. I spent the two hours I had going through my emails, checking my Facebook, chatting to a few friends, and getting up to date with the stories I was reading on Mibba.

Eventually, it hit 3:05, and I got up to leave. As I exited the building, my stomach let out another growl.

God, when are you ever NOT hungry?

It was true, my stomach was ALWAYS growling, two hours without food, and it would act like I hadn’t eaten for a week. I pulled out my Emily Strange wallet to check how much money I had on me, and was lucky to find that I had a ten dollar note in there. I shrugged my schoolbag back over my shoulders and started off towards the local McDonald’s.

Since school had let out, there was a small amount of kids already hanging out inside, it was normal for the kids in my area to spend their afternoons here. I walked up to the counter and ordered a large triple cheeseburger meal; huge, I know, but it seemed to be the only meal that filled me up at Macca’s.

I waited about ten minutes, and then my order was called out, I grabbed it, and went and sat in the corner by the window. Rain began to fall and I sighed and let a small smile spread across my lips. I loved rainy days, it was the only time I somewhat felt like I belonged in the world; when the weather reflected my emotions.

“EMO!” An all too familiar voice called out; Chantelle, the girlfriend of one of many guys I had once loved who had broken my heart.
“You know, Chan, what I find really funny about that is the fact that you’re calling Me Emo when you’re the one getting all emotional over the way I dress.” Oh yeah, I loved that comeback.
“I know what you do in your bathroom at night you little freak, don’t fool yourself into thinking people don’t know why you wear those faggy arm warmers.” She laughed, sitting down in a booth on the far side of the restaurant, with her friends; The Twins; Nicole and Kimmi, and Max, the guy I’d once loved.

Still loved, to be honest, but those days were over…

I zoned out again, gazing out of the window to the gloomy weather outside, sometimes, I felt like only Mother Nature understood me. The chair in front of me was drawn out, and somebody sat down in it. I looked over, and was met by the emerald green of Max’s eyes, and the golden shine of his curly blonde hair.

“Hey.”
“Shouldn’t you be off with your Emo hating girlfriend over there?” I sighed, looking back out the window.
“Missy.” He frowned, sliding his hand across the table to stroke mine for a short moment.
“Max, please.” I frowned, pulling my hand away and looking back at him. “Don’t give me the old nickname.”
“Look, whatever Chantelle says, you’re still my friend, okay?”
“Whatever.” I sighed.
“You okay?” he asked.
“You’re really fucking asking me that question, Max?” I snapped. “Really? I’m not o-fucking-kay! I haven’t been since you left me standing in the rain in your driveway the day you moved away!” I got up from the table, and swung my bag over my shoulder, running out of the restaurant.

Almost immediately, the tears began to fall. He’d hurt me, so fucking much, and he thought that I’d just forgive him and let him back into my life? No way in Hell. He’d been the trigger of my depression, the first little bolt in the pine box, and others followed soon after.

I’d known Max since I was 11, but once I hit the age of 13, I began to spend more time with him, going to his house almost every single day, and inevitably fell for him. The day after my 14th birthday, I took my friend Nikola over his place to meet him. Almost instantly, Max fell for her, and before I knew it, they were together.

I was enraged, but still determined to get him, so I’d fought for him. Unfortunately, I’d fought a little too hard; I was a complete bitch to him and Nikola, and in the end, had ruined their relationship. Although I’d gotten what I wanted, Max hated me for it, and I lost both him and Nikola as friends.

Why did he all of a sudden think he could be my friend? The guy had spent the last 2 and a half years tormenting me, calling me a slut, spreading rumors about me, talking shit about me behind my back, and he thought I’d just be okay with all that?

No fucking way.

I kept running, and the rain continued to fall, once again masking my tears…