The Past is Only the Future with the Lights On

"So he kissed you?"

"Yes."

"And you liked it."

More than you will ever know. "Yes."

"And there wasn't even any tongue involved."

"No tongue." I probably would have simultaneously combusted on the spot had there been tongue.

"And you're just telling me now."

"It was getting at me. I felt the need to tell someone."

Dahlia nodded with a thoughtful expression on her face as the two of us sat on a bench outside of our school, teenagers already loitering outside of it and awaiting the bell to ring, which would signal the start of our first day back to school.

I had called Dahlia last night, telling her there was something I had to talk to her about in private and then asked her to meet me here a little bit earlier than usual. And not wanting to answer the questions Frank would surely ask me if I'd told him I couldn't walk with him today, I asked my grandma to tell him I'd already left when he came by to pick me up.

After the twenty-sixth of December, aka the day Frank and I kissed, we hung out everyday for the rest of break, even slept over at each other's houses a few times, neither of us acting like anything had happened. We just continued to hang out and joke around like usual, making me grateful and confused at the same time.

I was grateful that it hadn't effected our friendship and that we weren't acting all weird around one another, but confused because every time I looked at him, I wondered if that kiss meant anything to him like it had to me. 'Cause he surely wasn't acting like it. It seemed like more of an everyday occurrence or something to him than it did to me.

So, even though I'd seen her plenty over break, here we were. Frank had been there too, so I couldn't talk to Dahlia about it, but I assumed now might be a good time.

I figured, if I told her most of the details, still keeping some things personal, she could help me. Turns out, I was wrong.

"Kel, it sounds to me like you have a crush on our Frankie Boy." A crush? Oh, no. It was much, much more. But I couldn't tell her that. What if she told Frank?

I quickly met her knowing smile, like she'd known all along.

"No, not a crush. I'm just confused," I lied.

"What's there to be confused about? He kissed you, you liked it, I'm almost positive he liked it as well," she shrugged. I looked up and slouched into the bench, watching as some of my fellow students parked their expensive SUV's and what not in the school parking lot, hopping out and slamming their doors closed, revealing to me the jocks and preps that were driving such gas guzzling vehicles.

"That's not what I'm confused about," I lied yet again. What surprised me most was that I was actually sounding convincing. I'd always been a crap liar, so I don't know how I was managing to pull it off now.

I met her gaze once more, her once knowing expression turned questioning.

"Yeah, I liked it," I continued, in reference to the kiss. "But I also think I like someone else."

Oh, I am so good.

"Eh?" she said dumbly, her facial expression making me let out a small laugh.

"I think I like Skyler." There, that won't put any sexual comments in her head that she'd probably use from now on when I was around Frank. Though I'd probably have to watch out for Skyler now.

"And so I was all, 'what do you mean I can't use the toaster anymore!?'" Mikey said in a high-pitched voice, causing Dahlia to laugh almost like she knew what he was talking about, as he sat down next to her and they immediately began making out.

With a sigh, I stood up and went to walk towards the school entrance so I could go to my locker, when I noticed Frank standing only inches behind the spot on the bench I'd just been sitting in, his hands in his pockets and his head hung low.

Had he heard what I'd just "admitted" to Dahlia? But even if he had, he wouldn't look this. . .sad. His hair was hiding his face but I could sense that something was wrong with him.

"Hey, asshole. What's wrong with you?" I asked straight forward, as usual when I was talking to him, and using his nickname.

He slowly lifted his head, putting on a quick smile that I could easily tell was forced.

I continued to walk towards the school, Frank now close to my side.

"Where were you this morning? Your grandma just told me that you had left early," he said, his voice sounding more harsh than concerned.

I raised an eyebrow at him as he threw daggers with his eyes at the ground.

Not this again, I thought.

"Dahlia had to talk to me about something," I said nonchalantly. I hope this lying thing wasn't going to become a regular occurrence.

He didn't say anything else. We just walked to our lockers with a thick, brick wall between us, the chattering of other students the only thing to be heard.

Just as I was slamming my locker closed, the loud blare of the bell went off. I turned on my heel to walk to homeroom with Frank and the wall he'd built, only to see him several feet ahead of me.

"Stupid asshole," I muttered to myself through clenched teeth.

Frank could be the most loving guy you'll ever meet, but at times, he can be so damn stubborn and childish. And he doesn't explain himself, so you just get frustrated with things.

Walking into our homeroom class, I went straight for my usual desk in the back, taking notice to how Frank was now sitting in the front row. No one ever sat there.

He kept his stare on the desk top as I strode by, shaking my head at his immaturity.

Seconds before the late bell rang, Mikey and D entered the room, their hands conjoined and big, goofy smiles spread across their faces. Each time I looked at them, I couldn't help but feel jealous. They were so lucky to have each other.

They were so caught up in themselves, they didn't even realize Frank had changed seats until they'd sat down.

"What the hell," Mikey said loudly, striking the teacher's attention from the 'profanity' he'd just used. Mrs. Foley yelled at him to "keep that language on the playground," which made the whole class erupt in laughter, including Frank and I. Mikey mumbled his sorry, his cheeks beet red, just as the door clicked open; late student.

I set my eyes on the back of Frank's head, seeing his head turned in the direction of the door and his jaw dropped ever so slightly. Intrigued, I also looked at the door.

Woah. Not a late student, a new student. And she already had the eyes of Frank Iero on her.

He only looked at me twice at the coffee shop because he'd remembered seeing me in the fight.

This girl was just gorgeous. Waves of naturally dark brown hair escalated down her back, reaching the bottom of her white Black Flag shirt. Even if she didn't have her amazing features, Frank would be all over her simply because of her shirt.

"Oh, class, this is Victoria Caddie. Did I say that correctly?" Mrs. Foley turned to the girl, receiving a nod in response. "She just moved here from Illinois and will be attending Belleville High for the next month. Please, have a seat Victoria."

Don't sit there. Don't sit there. Don't sit there. Don't - DAMMIT! You just had to choose the seat next to Frank, didn't you?

This was going to be a very long month, I could already tell.