Sequel: Four Years ›
Status: Completed. Read the sequel "Four Years" :)
My Saving Grace
Candles
Alex's POV
I froze as soon as I heard her voice; the voice I hadn't heard in five days. The voice I missed so fucking much...
I had dropped the phone, due to the shock of her actually picking up. I didn't think she would. Jack gasped before yelling at me to pick the phone up off the floor.
"Look, if you're some asshole prank calling me, I will hunt you down, and rip your balls off," She said angrily, probably gritting her teeth like she always did when she got mad.
"Pick up the fucking phone!" Jack screamed. Why didn't he just pick it up if he wanted to talk to her so badly? He was such an idiot sometimes.
I reached for the phone and held it up in between Jack and I.
"He - hello?" I stuttered out. Why was I acting like this?
"Hi?" She said, probably annoyed at Jack and me already.
"Give me the fucking phone," Jack whisper-yelled at me.
"No!"
"Who the fuck is this?" She asked, getting irritated. Great, we pissed her off.
"Rachel, we miss you, oh my God! Please come home!" Jack screamed as I dropped the phone again. I shot him a glare. Why the hell was he so fucking stupid?
"Jack?!" She screamed, before a clinking noise was heard. I think she dropped the phone.
"And Alex!" Jack said, smiling that dumbass crooked smile of his. She couldn't see it, why was he smiling?
I reached down and picked up the phone, handing it to Jack. He obviously had a lot more to say than I did. I was just so fucking nervous. I had no fucking clue why. I guess she still had that effect on me. Even miles away...
"Ho - how'd you get thi - this num - number?" She stuttered. Was she...
"I stole it from Kara's phone," Jack said, smirking. What a douche. Now Kara would know what we did. She would be fucking pissed.
"Hi Rachel..." I finally spit out. I wanted her to say hi to me...so badly. I just wanted to hear her say my name one more time.
"Stop fucking calling me. I'm never going back - "
"You need to come home!" Jack screamed, interrupting her. Jackass.
"I am home, Jack," She said.
"California is not home, Rae," I whispered. Did she really think that California was her home? She'd only been gone one week. One week is not enough to make a state miles away a home. This was her home...
"It is now, Alex," She spoke quietly. "Seriously, though, stop fucking calling me. I'm getting sick of it. So are the people I live with."
"I've only called you once..." I said, playing with my necklace. Why was she so mad at us?
"Once too many, Alex," She sighed.
"Who do you live with?" Jack gasped. Well, he's passed the fact that she's never coming back.
All of a sudden, we heard the line go dead. She hung up on us...
"Dude, I'm calling her back," Jack said, starting to press the buttons.
I swatted the phone out of his hands. I didn't want him calling her again. She would just get even more upset. And so would I.
"What the fuck was that for?" Jack asked, glaring at me.
I sighed before running my hand through my dark brown hair, "Jack, don't bug her again."
"Are you fucking kidding me? I thought you would want to know where she is! I thought you would want to know how the fuck she's doing. I thought you - "
"Get the fuck out!" I yelled, finally getting fed up with his ranting. I pointed to the door, waiting for him to drag his ass out of my room.
He just sat there. I swear to God if he didn't leave soon...
"I said get the fuck out," I spat at him, venom dripping off my words. Why the fuck was I acting like such a douchebag? Oh, wait, maybe it's because he was acting like a fucking retard, telling her how we got her number, how she needed to come home, etc.
"Why? Why the fuck should I leave?" He spat back, folding his arms across his chest. "Are you going to let a fucking girl ruin our friendship? If you are, you're a complete asshole."
That was like a shot to the heart. I couldn't believe he actually said that to me.
"She's not some fucking girl, Jack! I loved her!" I screamed. I felt my blood begin to boil, and my stomach twist into knots. My fists were now balled up. Oh, great.
"Alex, I loved her too," He said, his tone a little calmer than five seconds ago, but still not completely calm. "Do you think this isn't hard for me? Dude, why the fuck do you think I drink every fucking night? It's all because of her!"
I fell backwards onto my bed, and covered my face with my hands. I now felt like an asshole. A complete asshole.
"I'm sorry, Jack," I said sincerely.
I heard him chuckle, "Whatever, dude. Just get over the fact that she's not coming back."
I sat up and looked him straight in the eye, "As much as I tell myself to get over it, I can't. It fucking sucks. It's like...it's like she's got a curse on me. She haunts everything. I really want to just move on, but I can't."
"Well, Lisa can help you forget," He smirked.
I forced a crooked smile. Lisa would make me forget everything...
*
Four hours later, I was partying my ass off at Jack's. We had both decided to throw this party in order for me to get over that bitch who left me.
"Hey, Lisa," I slurred as she approached me, carrying a red, plastic cup. I wanted whatever was in there...
I grabbed her cup and downed the liquid that filled it. Yum, rum and coke.
"Hey, Alex," She giggled. God, she was so cute. "So, you and Jack just decided to throw this outta the blue?"
I nodded, biting my lip. Hopefully she found that cute. I was so desperate at this point. And, desperateness plus alcohol makes for an interesting night....
"Well, it's awesome," She smiled, grabbing my hand. Was she going to do something?
No, I needed to be the one to make the first move! I wanted to be the one that got her upstairs, not the other way around!
I smiled before leaning down to kiss her. Cheers sounded behind us. Well, the guys were watching.
She pulled away, giggling like crazy, "Wow, Alex."
I smirked, tugging her hand and leading her up the stairs.
A little voice in the back of my mind kept repeating a name. I think it kept saying Rachel. Rachel who?
***
Rachel's POV
"Rae?"
I ripped my eyes away from the TV for a second to see who said my name. I saw Joe standing in by the fireplace.
"Sup, dude?" I asked, patting the seat next to me for him to come and plant his butt down.
He did as he was gestured to and took the seat next to me. "Did you packed everything?" He asked, turning to me.
"Joe, it's eight o'clock, I can go upstairs and pack more later," I smiled, turning my attention back to the TV.
"It's actually nine."
"What?! Ugh, I don't wanna go pack!" I whined, shutting off the TV.
"I thought I helped you pack most of it?" He asked, raising his eyebrow.
I sighed and got up off my butt, "There's more."
I dragged myself up the stairs. Pete was up here, and I honestly didn't want to see him, but I had to finish packing. We were leaving tomorrow at 10AM, and still half of my stuff was not in my suitcases.
I slowly walked into my room, dreading what was about to come. I didn't know why I was so scared. My emotions were at an all time high with this thing inside of me, so maybe that was why?
The door was open just a crack. I pushed it open with my foot before walking in. I saw Pete lying on the bed, his face planted in the pillows. He was asleep, good.
There were papers surrounding him. He was writing. That's why he ran up here earlier. I quietly walked over to the bed and picked up a piece of paper. I scanned it over. It was the song he was working on a few days ago...
You only hold me up like this
'Cause you don't know who I really am
Sometimes I just want to know what it's like to be you
We're making out inside crashed cars
We're sleeping through all our memories
I used to waste my time dreaming of being alive
Now I only waste it dreaming of you
Turn off the lights and turn off the shyness
'Cause all of our moves make up for the silence
And, oh, the way your makeup stains my pillowcase
Like I'll never be the same
You only hold me up like this
'Cause you don't know who I really am
I used to waste my time on, waste my time on, waste my time dreaming of being alive
Now I only waste it dreaming of you
Turn off the lights and turn off the shyness
'Cause all of our moves make up for the silence
And, oh, the way your makeup stains my pillowcase
Like I'll never be the same
I've got headaches and bad luck but they couldn't touch you, no
I've got headaches and bad luck but they couldn't touch you, no
I'm not trying
You only hold me up like this
Turn off the lights and turn off the shyness
'Cause all of our moves make up for the silence
And, oh, the way your makeup stains
Like I'll never be the same
He finished it. I smiled at the piece of paper. I was holding a paper that held Pete's thoughts. I never thought I would say that.
I couldn't help but to wonder who it was written about, or why it was written. I wanted to know the meaning behind it. I could sit on the bed for hours, trying to figure it out. But, I would just over-analyze it and think it was about me or something stupid like that.
Pete turned over and faced me, his face kinda looked shocked. Was he awake this whole time?
"What are you doing?" He asked, his voice a little scratchy. No, he just woke up.
"I came up here to finish packing and I saw this...and got a little distracted," I said, slightly smiling as I looked down at the paper. "What's this about?"
"Nothing," He said, quickly snatching the paper out of my hands. He stuffed it back into his song folder, along with all his other papers that were strewn across the bed. "Aren't you gonna pack?"
"Aren't you gonna tell me what that song's about?" I countered, folding my arms across my chest.
"Nope," He smirked. "It's not important."
"Packing isn - wait, yes it is," I sighed, giving up. "I still wanna know what that's about."
"It's about someone, happy?" He said, getting up off the bed with the folder in hand. He walked over to his suitcases and tucked it inside of one. "Hurry up and get packed, we're all going out for dinner soon."
"At nine o'clock?" I asked, raising my eyebrow.
"You haven't eaten, have you?"
"Well, no..."
He smirked again, "See you downstairs in ten minutes."
He wasn't acting weird about what happened earlier. Maybe that meant I shouldn't be so worried about this either? I mean, nothing really did happen. And, I like Pete. I think? I groaned and plopped down onto the bed. Why must my life be so goddamn complicated?
I froze as soon as I heard her voice; the voice I hadn't heard in five days. The voice I missed so fucking much...
I had dropped the phone, due to the shock of her actually picking up. I didn't think she would. Jack gasped before yelling at me to pick the phone up off the floor.
"Look, if you're some asshole prank calling me, I will hunt you down, and rip your balls off," She said angrily, probably gritting her teeth like she always did when she got mad.
"Pick up the fucking phone!" Jack screamed. Why didn't he just pick it up if he wanted to talk to her so badly? He was such an idiot sometimes.
I reached for the phone and held it up in between Jack and I.
"He - hello?" I stuttered out. Why was I acting like this?
"Hi?" She said, probably annoyed at Jack and me already.
"Give me the fucking phone," Jack whisper-yelled at me.
"No!"
"Who the fuck is this?" She asked, getting irritated. Great, we pissed her off.
"Rachel, we miss you, oh my God! Please come home!" Jack screamed as I dropped the phone again. I shot him a glare. Why the hell was he so fucking stupid?
"Jack?!" She screamed, before a clinking noise was heard. I think she dropped the phone.
"And Alex!" Jack said, smiling that dumbass crooked smile of his. She couldn't see it, why was he smiling?
I reached down and picked up the phone, handing it to Jack. He obviously had a lot more to say than I did. I was just so fucking nervous. I had no fucking clue why. I guess she still had that effect on me. Even miles away...
"Ho - how'd you get thi - this num - number?" She stuttered. Was she...
"I stole it from Kara's phone," Jack said, smirking. What a douche. Now Kara would know what we did. She would be fucking pissed.
"Hi Rachel..." I finally spit out. I wanted her to say hi to me...so badly. I just wanted to hear her say my name one more time.
"Stop fucking calling me. I'm never going back - "
"You need to come home!" Jack screamed, interrupting her. Jackass.
"I am home, Jack," She said.
"California is not home, Rae," I whispered. Did she really think that California was her home? She'd only been gone one week. One week is not enough to make a state miles away a home. This was her home...
"It is now, Alex," She spoke quietly. "Seriously, though, stop fucking calling me. I'm getting sick of it. So are the people I live with."
"I've only called you once..." I said, playing with my necklace. Why was she so mad at us?
"Once too many, Alex," She sighed.
"Who do you live with?" Jack gasped. Well, he's passed the fact that she's never coming back.
All of a sudden, we heard the line go dead. She hung up on us...
"Dude, I'm calling her back," Jack said, starting to press the buttons.
I swatted the phone out of his hands. I didn't want him calling her again. She would just get even more upset. And so would I.
"What the fuck was that for?" Jack asked, glaring at me.
I sighed before running my hand through my dark brown hair, "Jack, don't bug her again."
"Are you fucking kidding me? I thought you would want to know where she is! I thought you would want to know how the fuck she's doing. I thought you - "
"Get the fuck out!" I yelled, finally getting fed up with his ranting. I pointed to the door, waiting for him to drag his ass out of my room.
He just sat there. I swear to God if he didn't leave soon...
"I said get the fuck out," I spat at him, venom dripping off my words. Why the fuck was I acting like such a douchebag? Oh, wait, maybe it's because he was acting like a fucking retard, telling her how we got her number, how she needed to come home, etc.
"Why? Why the fuck should I leave?" He spat back, folding his arms across his chest. "Are you going to let a fucking girl ruin our friendship? If you are, you're a complete asshole."
That was like a shot to the heart. I couldn't believe he actually said that to me.
"She's not some fucking girl, Jack! I loved her!" I screamed. I felt my blood begin to boil, and my stomach twist into knots. My fists were now balled up. Oh, great.
"Alex, I loved her too," He said, his tone a little calmer than five seconds ago, but still not completely calm. "Do you think this isn't hard for me? Dude, why the fuck do you think I drink every fucking night? It's all because of her!"
I fell backwards onto my bed, and covered my face with my hands. I now felt like an asshole. A complete asshole.
"I'm sorry, Jack," I said sincerely.
I heard him chuckle, "Whatever, dude. Just get over the fact that she's not coming back."
I sat up and looked him straight in the eye, "As much as I tell myself to get over it, I can't. It fucking sucks. It's like...it's like she's got a curse on me. She haunts everything. I really want to just move on, but I can't."
"Well, Lisa can help you forget," He smirked.
I forced a crooked smile. Lisa would make me forget everything...
*
Four hours later, I was partying my ass off at Jack's. We had both decided to throw this party in order for me to get over that bitch who left me.
"Hey, Lisa," I slurred as she approached me, carrying a red, plastic cup. I wanted whatever was in there...
I grabbed her cup and downed the liquid that filled it. Yum, rum and coke.
"Hey, Alex," She giggled. God, she was so cute. "So, you and Jack just decided to throw this outta the blue?"
I nodded, biting my lip. Hopefully she found that cute. I was so desperate at this point. And, desperateness plus alcohol makes for an interesting night....
"Well, it's awesome," She smiled, grabbing my hand. Was she going to do something?
No, I needed to be the one to make the first move! I wanted to be the one that got her upstairs, not the other way around!
I smiled before leaning down to kiss her. Cheers sounded behind us. Well, the guys were watching.
She pulled away, giggling like crazy, "Wow, Alex."
I smirked, tugging her hand and leading her up the stairs.
A little voice in the back of my mind kept repeating a name. I think it kept saying Rachel. Rachel who?
***
Rachel's POV
"Rae?"
I ripped my eyes away from the TV for a second to see who said my name. I saw Joe standing in by the fireplace.
"Sup, dude?" I asked, patting the seat next to me for him to come and plant his butt down.
He did as he was gestured to and took the seat next to me. "Did you packed everything?" He asked, turning to me.
"Joe, it's eight o'clock, I can go upstairs and pack more later," I smiled, turning my attention back to the TV.
"It's actually nine."
"What?! Ugh, I don't wanna go pack!" I whined, shutting off the TV.
"I thought I helped you pack most of it?" He asked, raising his eyebrow.
I sighed and got up off my butt, "There's more."
I dragged myself up the stairs. Pete was up here, and I honestly didn't want to see him, but I had to finish packing. We were leaving tomorrow at 10AM, and still half of my stuff was not in my suitcases.
I slowly walked into my room, dreading what was about to come. I didn't know why I was so scared. My emotions were at an all time high with this thing inside of me, so maybe that was why?
The door was open just a crack. I pushed it open with my foot before walking in. I saw Pete lying on the bed, his face planted in the pillows. He was asleep, good.
There were papers surrounding him. He was writing. That's why he ran up here earlier. I quietly walked over to the bed and picked up a piece of paper. I scanned it over. It was the song he was working on a few days ago...
You only hold me up like this
'Cause you don't know who I really am
Sometimes I just want to know what it's like to be you
We're making out inside crashed cars
We're sleeping through all our memories
I used to waste my time dreaming of being alive
Now I only waste it dreaming of you
Turn off the lights and turn off the shyness
'Cause all of our moves make up for the silence
And, oh, the way your makeup stains my pillowcase
Like I'll never be the same
You only hold me up like this
'Cause you don't know who I really am
I used to waste my time on, waste my time on, waste my time dreaming of being alive
Now I only waste it dreaming of you
Turn off the lights and turn off the shyness
'Cause all of our moves make up for the silence
And, oh, the way your makeup stains my pillowcase
Like I'll never be the same
I've got headaches and bad luck but they couldn't touch you, no
I've got headaches and bad luck but they couldn't touch you, no
I'm not trying
You only hold me up like this
Turn off the lights and turn off the shyness
'Cause all of our moves make up for the silence
And, oh, the way your makeup stains
Like I'll never be the same
He finished it. I smiled at the piece of paper. I was holding a paper that held Pete's thoughts. I never thought I would say that.
I couldn't help but to wonder who it was written about, or why it was written. I wanted to know the meaning behind it. I could sit on the bed for hours, trying to figure it out. But, I would just over-analyze it and think it was about me or something stupid like that.
Pete turned over and faced me, his face kinda looked shocked. Was he awake this whole time?
"What are you doing?" He asked, his voice a little scratchy. No, he just woke up.
"I came up here to finish packing and I saw this...and got a little distracted," I said, slightly smiling as I looked down at the paper. "What's this about?"
"Nothing," He said, quickly snatching the paper out of my hands. He stuffed it back into his song folder, along with all his other papers that were strewn across the bed. "Aren't you gonna pack?"
"Aren't you gonna tell me what that song's about?" I countered, folding my arms across my chest.
"Nope," He smirked. "It's not important."
"Packing isn - wait, yes it is," I sighed, giving up. "I still wanna know what that's about."
"It's about someone, happy?" He said, getting up off the bed with the folder in hand. He walked over to his suitcases and tucked it inside of one. "Hurry up and get packed, we're all going out for dinner soon."
"At nine o'clock?" I asked, raising my eyebrow.
"You haven't eaten, have you?"
"Well, no..."
He smirked again, "See you downstairs in ten minutes."
He wasn't acting weird about what happened earlier. Maybe that meant I shouldn't be so worried about this either? I mean, nothing really did happen. And, I like Pete. I think? I groaned and plopped down onto the bed. Why must my life be so goddamn complicated?
♠ ♠ ♠
title credit:// candles - hey monday.(i couldn't choose between this song, or wish you were here. i think this fits better, yeah?)
THERE WAS AN EARTHQUAKE HERE YESTERDAY MORNING AT 5! IT WAS A 3.6 MAGNITUDE. O: IN MARYLAND OF ALL PLACES. AND REALLY CLOSE NEAR WHERE I LIVE, TOO. OOOO:
i slept through it. lmfao. :| i woke up around 9, got my ipod, laid back down, and checked fb. everyone's status was about the earthquake. i'm kinda said i missed it. :/
DRINK THIS RIGHT NOW, OR I'LL POUR IT ON THE FLOOR AND BLAME IT ON YOU!
my friend showed me this video earlier, and i couldn't stop laughing. xD
so, thoughts on this very poorly written chapter? i apologize, btw. i've had such bad writers block, it's insane. :|
x.