Me or the Music?

"I don't know what to do." I sighed and jabbed a spoon in to the ice cream as Jackie shrugged.

"Well.... I don't even know what to say." She sighed "I mean, I bet if you two tried hard enough you could work through it all but... Do you want to?"

I looked down at the floor "What if I don't?"

"You can.... Oh gosh I hate saying this, but... I mean... Ugh." She groaned "This is so confusing. I'd say get a divorce, but... Being Matt's best friend's fiance," She smirked "I say stay with him and work it out. It's only been two years, hun, you two shouldn't have this many problems."

"But we do." I nodded "So..."

"So..." She sighed "I don't know. Pretend I never said any of that. Do what you think is right."

"I need to call a lawyer, Matt's going to kill me." I whispered "I don't like giving up on things, but we're going nowhere."

"Then was getting married the right choice?" She looked me dead in the eyes "I mean, you can legitimately say you rushed into it, I bet he'll understand."

"He'll be mad." I stated.

"Duh, what guy wouldn't be? He's losing the person who helped him get over his girlfriend's suicide."

"Way to play the guilt card, Jackie." I laughed.

"That's not what I'm doing." She winked "But if it's working to get you to stay together..."

"I want something different." I sighed "I want kids, a husband who comes home at the same time every night, a white picket fence with flowers infront of it, and pets. I want pets." I Smiled.

"You want a Cinderella dream life." Jackie corrected.

"No, I want the right life. This may be right for some people, the tour life, but I did my time. I was there, toured, spent time away from home. Now I want to settle down. But my husband doesn't." I looked her dead in the eye "What would you say to that?"

"Personally?" She asked, I nodded "Personally I'd say get a divorce. I mean... yeah it's soon, yeah it's cold. But... UGH!" She laughed "I can't believe I'm telling my best friend's wife to divorce him. Really. We all saw how much losing Cori hurt him, now he'll be losing you too. God I'm stupid! Stay with him, stay stay stay!" She laughed.

"No no and no." I sighed "Thinking about it now... It feels right."

"Oh God I created a monster!" She threw her hands up "If he asks... I said nothing."

"I know, I wouldn't rat you out like that. But... I need a place to stay while I send him the papers."

"Don't look at me, Brian would find out and he's already been in the middle of too much shit to do with Matt and his girls." Jackie held her hands up "No offense."

"None taken."

"Well..." She looked around "I gotta go. But uhm... I'll talk to you. Really think about what you're doing, before you do it, ok? I don't want you to regret this later. Again." She stood up.

"I'll think about it. I probably won't do anything until I can walk anyways." I laughed as she leaned down to hug me "Tell Brian I said hi."

"I will, you tell Matt I said hey, too. See ya' kiddo."

"Bye." I smiled as she showed herself out.

I turned back around and sighed, I needed a lawer. I needed to get my life back. I needed someone who loved me. As selfish as that sounds and is.