Who We'll Be

I hate you, Sky Winter.

I sat up on my bed, grabbed the pillow nearest to me, and punched it. I named the pillow Sky.

I hope something bad happen to you.

I gave the pillow another punch.

I hope you choke on the cupcakes left on your fridge…

And another.

I hope you slip on a puddle on the street…

Oh yeah…I’m a professional boxer.

I hope you…I hope you hit your head…

…hard…

…so hard….

…that you’ll start to realize how much you miss me…

It had been weeks. Weeks.

To be more specific, it had been 3 weeks, 1 day, and about 8 hours and 34 minutes that I didn’t talk to him. Not that I’m counting.

No talk. No calls.

We don’t even say hi whenever we bump into each other at school, and we act like none of us even exist…

Not that I care though.

35 minutes.

36 minutes.

37 min—

What am I doing? I’m wasting my time…

I violently threw Sky the Pillow Version beside me as I stood up from the bed, feeling a bit nauseated, because I didn’t sleep well. As usual.

I stared at the clock, and it says it’s 4:16 A.M.

Time to live and survive the day.

* * *

“GO GO GO! You can do it guys! You can beat ‘em! Kick their visitor ass!” Jane shouted as she jumped up and down the bleachers like the rest of the crowd, watching the basketball game in it’s last minute, while I quietly sat next to her.

After a few seconds, the sound of a ball being dribbled and shot was heard, and our school basketball team had won.

The crowd cheered, and people—and Jane, leaving me alone on the bleachers—started moving towards the team to congratulate them.

I just sighed and went away from the crowd, almost carelessly bumping everyone on my way.

I need some peace and quiet. Maybe I’ll go to the library for the first time or something…

I walked down from the bleachers towards the hall, where there seemed to be nobody else around…

…until I bumped into someone. Well, I’m not really looking where I was going—

Oh God…not you.

Of all the people I could bump to, it just had to be him.

Him. Ugh. I hate my life.

Sky looked straight at me and I shyly looked back at him.

He looked really tired, with the bags under his eyes and his messy hair…

I looked down.

Oh, my God…maybe my evil wishes this morning came true! I feel so bad!

Did the make-him-realize-how-much-he-miss-me part came true as well?

Did he…miss me? Even just a little bit?

This was the first time in weeks that I was really this close to Sky, and my heart started beating faster than the drums in a fast rock song, while it was spinning and shattering wildly, because every memory of us together started flooding through my mind…

…breaking my heart all over again.

I bit my lip until it felt like it was bleeding, trying to prevent everything I wanted to say, and ran.

“Symmery…wait…” was all I heard from him, all week.

But I still continued to run.

Away from him.

Away from my first real love…

Away from my everything.

I ran behind the school, which seemed to be the most isolated place at the moment, because everyone were still celebrating at the basketball court. The sun seemed to be punishing me for running from him like that, with it’s orange-pink light glowering down on me.

I started to wonder why I even ran like that myself, until I realized…

…I ran because I don’t want to talk to him right now.

I still can’t.

I needed to breathe.

And I can’t, with him too close to me like that…

It’s just…tearing me apart.

I strolled around alone the place for a while, until I decided to go back…

…until I bumped into someone. Again. Am I cursed with bumping-into-hot-guys bad luck or something?

Because the person I had bumped into was Eric.

“Hey…” I said.

He smiled. “Hey.”

“Why aren’t you celebrating with the team?” I asked, looking down, because my stupid eyes kept on letting my tears fall.

“Yeah…I was about to go back in there…I just did a quick errand.”

“Oh. Nice game by the way,” I remarked. “You played really good.”

“Thanks,” Eric said.

I just replied to him with a forced smile. I was about to walk away, when he suddenly held my hand.

“What’s wrong?” he asked worriedly.

“What? No, it’s nothing. Nothing’s wrong,” I casually said, wiping my tears before they completely fall.

“You can tell me…” he said, sounding sincerely concerned. “I’ll listen.”

“Um…thanks…” was all I managed to utter as I continued to walk away.

“Symmery…” he whispered my name.

I turned around.

“Yes?”

“You know…if you ever need someone…”

He smiled.

“…I’m right here.”

And with that, the next thing I did made no sense at all.

I started crying in his arms, sobbing like a total crybaby...but I don’t care. And he didn’t seem to care either. And it was the only thing I need right now.

A shoulder to cry on.

After I had cried my eyes out, he started wiping my tears with his own gentle fingers, and he looked at me with his pretty eyes that were filled with compassion in them.

I innocently looked back at him.

And without any warning…

…Eric’s lips were softly placed on mine.

It was a quick kiss.

Too gentle.

Too…Eric.

After he pulled away, I looked at him again with eyes and mouth widely opened, and my body was frozen by his gesture.

He just sighed.

“Look, Symmery…I know I’m coming off a little too fast. I mean, you just broke up with your boyfriend…but I’m not asking you to give me an answer now. I just want to tell you my feelings before anyone else does.”

I looked down. “But I’m not sure if I can return your feelings for me…”

He lifted up my chin with his fingers. “You’ll never know if you don’t try, right?”

He smiled warmly as he held my hand.

“I love you. I’m willing to wait.”

He put his arms around me, and my heart pounded as his embrace gave me a string of surprise…

…and hope.

“Give me a chance, Symmery.”

He was smiling his comforting smile, which never failed to lighten me up a bit.

“I’ll make you…forget about him.”