I'm Waiting

Love is a scary thing. It’s one of those things you don’t understand. People can’t fully understand, express, or learn about it. It’s just something that you have to feel to really get, you know what I mean?

It’s complicated and comes out of now where. It comes in the funniest shapes and sizes. It comes in ways that you don’t expect and that’s what makes it so great. The mystery of it all, because everyone likes a little mystery in their life.

Love is a really scary thing, but I’m willing to take my chances with it. I’m willing to love Troy if he’s willing to love me, because love is really a great thing to have.

It makes one soar and do things that they normally couldn’t and although there’s a lot of bumps along the way in the end it’s all worth it. The experience is a good one to have, even if it ends badly. So I’m willing to try this out if Troy is because…

I’ve always been waiting. I’ve always been waiting for something or someone.

I’m waiting for a friend. I’m waiting for family. I’m waiting for something more. I’m waiting for Troy. I’m waiting to be rescued from this hell. I’m always waiting, waiting, and waiting.

And I’m tired of it. I’m tired of waiting. I’m fed up with waiting.

I want to try something for once. I want to try to get my hands on something for once and not wait for it to slip into my hands. I want to be able to grab a hold of something and keep it with me, not wait for it to settle in and stay with me.

I don’t want to wait for things to happen. I want to make them happen.

I’m not waiting anymore because I don’t need to. I have everything I need and will ever need with me right here and now and I’m not going to wait for it to leave. I’m going to keep it with me no matter what.

“Nash, sweetie, your friend is here!”

I perk up at the sound of Lilly’s voice and stampeding footsteps. My door is thrown open and I smile at the sight before me. It only takes a few seconds for me to jump into Dorian’s open arms, where he swings me around in circles and laughs.

“Dorian, I’ve missed you!” I shout, hugging my best friend tight. “You wouldn’t believe what’s gone on since you’ve been away.”

Dorian laughs, “Try me.”

He looks at me curiously as I turn to face Troy, The one boy who has made my life both a living hell and heaven, the boy who I once thought hated me, the boy who I once thought used me…the boy who actually loves and cares for me the most, the boy who has changed everything and taught me that I have to work for what I want and not wait for the things to happen…

Seeing me look at him he smirks and asks, “What?”

I turn back to Dorian, who seems to be clueless of what I’m thinking about. With possibly one of the biggest smiles I’ve ever made I say to him. “I’m done waiting.”