‹ Prequel: We Come Out At Night 4
We Come Out At Night 5
Chapter 36
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Shadows
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Izzy spent two weeks in the psych ward at the hospital. All the while, I couldn’t stop thinking about how all the signs were there all along and we never caught on to any of them. The first scar that Marco put on her face should have been reason enough to make her see a therapist. All that time she was lashing out at Kristina, it was a cry for attention. She begged me to leave her and go to the party by myself and that should have been another red flag for me. She was so fragile then. When she was brought into the hospital, the doctors said that they put her in the psych ward because her injury was self-inflicted and that it was hospital policy. They told me that the cuts she made were horizontal and if she had made them vertically, I’d be planning her funeral right now. It tore at my heart to know that she was so sick. Every morning since that day, the first words that popped into my head were…”If only..” If only I had been more sensitive to her needs. If only I had been a better boyfriend. If only I hadn’t yelled at her when she lashed out. If only I had handled things differently. If only…
Because she was admitted on a suicide attempt, it was also hospital policy that Izzy have a full psychiatric evaluation. They told me that she was diagnosed with depression and they recommended medication for her. She refused and I agreed. I didn’t want her to walk around like a zombie. They released her as an outpatient on the condition that she reports once per week to a therapist. Izzy wasn’t fond of that idea. She really wanted nothing more to do with the hospital, but now, she had no choice.
“Hey peanut, you up for a visitor?” She was sitting up in our bed reading a magazine when I sat down beside her.
“I guess I should just get it over with. Who is it?”
“Gates.”
She sighed and closed her magazine. “Ok.”
“I’ll be right outside in the living room if you need me.” When I walked out the door he walked in and in some tiny way, I was jealous.
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Gates
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“Got room for one more in there?” I asked and she slid over in the bed so I could get in next to her. I pulled her close to me and wrapped my arms around her waist and rested my chin on her shoulder. “So, you come here often?” I joked and she smiled a half smile for me.
“You know it never should have come to this.” I told her. “I didn’t mean for you to take what I said so badly.”
“I didn’t do it because of what you said, so don’t go blaming yourself because I can’t handle any more guilt.”
“Well, I can’t handle you not being around anymore.” I squeezed her waist gently and she put her hands over mine. “So, don’t go doing anything stupid like that ever again, ok?”
“Ok.” She nodded.
I pressed my lips to her cheek and she brought her hand up to my face and held it there. “I have a favor to ask.”
“Ok. Ask.”
I rested my chin back on her shoulder and she let out a small sigh. “You know that I’m going to marry Kristina, right?”
“Yeah, and don’t worry, I wont cause any drama.” I understand why she would say that, but that isn’t what I was getting at.
“Well, I would like you to be my best girl?”
“Huh?” She turned around to face me and looked at me like I just said the most awful thing known to man. “Isn’t that Kristina?”
I smiled down at her. “Kristina is my best girl, yes, but in another sense. I want you to be by my side at the wedding. You know all the other girls will be bride’s maids and standing on Kristina’s side, but you, you have always been more like one of the guys, so I would love it if you would stand up for me.”
Izzy looked at me and I couldn’t tell what she was thinking, but I knew that she was. “Don’t you think that will make Kristina mad?”
“Nope. In fact, it was her idea.”
“Yeah.” She nodded. “I kinda figured you couldn’t come up with something that good on your own.”
“Hey!” I laughed and started tickling her relentlessly.
“Please! If I say yes, will you stop?”
“Uh huh.” I nodded.
“Ok, yes, but I’m not wearing a tuxedo.” I laughed and kissed her head before getting up out of the bed.
“I should go. Kristina has a stripper pole and she knows how to use it.”
Izzy laughed and sat up in the bed. “Bye Brian.”
“Bye.” I winked at her and walked out of the bedroom.
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Christ
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I was sitting on the couch when Chelsea walked in with London. The two of them had their hands full of packages. “What is all of that?” I asked pointing to all of the bags.
“Just stuff.” Chelsea said.
“That doesn’t look like just stuff.” I replied. London laughed and went into the kitchen with the bags she was carrying. “Ok, what are you two little divas up to?”
Chelsea set her bags on the ground and gave me a big smile. ‘We’re gonna have a party.”
“We are?”
She nodded and kneeled down on the floor and started rifling through her bags and pulling out decorations. “Chelsea?”
“Yes.” She answered without even looking up at me.
“When is this party taking place?”
“Tomorrow afternoon.” She smiled up at me as if it were something that I was supposed to already know. Meanwhile, it looked like wal-mart just vomited all over my living room floor.
“Do you have a cake pan?” London asked as she stood in the doorway.
I shook my head no. What the hell would I have a cake pan for? It’s not like I’ve ever baked a cake. “You’re baking a cake?”
“Of course we are, Johnny. You can’t have a party without a cake.” Chelsea answered.
“Right, how dare I. I think I’m gonna go see what The Rev is doing and leave you two to plan your little party.”
“Oh it’s not a little party.” Chelsea shook her head. “It’s gonna be a big party!”
“Ok, then.” I shook my head and walked out the door leaving the two of them to their sea of pink and purple party favors and whatever other girly stuff they had.
Shadows
-------------
Izzy spent two weeks in the psych ward at the hospital. All the while, I couldn’t stop thinking about how all the signs were there all along and we never caught on to any of them. The first scar that Marco put on her face should have been reason enough to make her see a therapist. All that time she was lashing out at Kristina, it was a cry for attention. She begged me to leave her and go to the party by myself and that should have been another red flag for me. She was so fragile then. When she was brought into the hospital, the doctors said that they put her in the psych ward because her injury was self-inflicted and that it was hospital policy. They told me that the cuts she made were horizontal and if she had made them vertically, I’d be planning her funeral right now. It tore at my heart to know that she was so sick. Every morning since that day, the first words that popped into my head were…”If only..” If only I had been more sensitive to her needs. If only I had been a better boyfriend. If only I hadn’t yelled at her when she lashed out. If only I had handled things differently. If only…
Because she was admitted on a suicide attempt, it was also hospital policy that Izzy have a full psychiatric evaluation. They told me that she was diagnosed with depression and they recommended medication for her. She refused and I agreed. I didn’t want her to walk around like a zombie. They released her as an outpatient on the condition that she reports once per week to a therapist. Izzy wasn’t fond of that idea. She really wanted nothing more to do with the hospital, but now, she had no choice.
“Hey peanut, you up for a visitor?” She was sitting up in our bed reading a magazine when I sat down beside her.
“I guess I should just get it over with. Who is it?”
“Gates.”
She sighed and closed her magazine. “Ok.”
“I’ll be right outside in the living room if you need me.” When I walked out the door he walked in and in some tiny way, I was jealous.
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Gates
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“Got room for one more in there?” I asked and she slid over in the bed so I could get in next to her. I pulled her close to me and wrapped my arms around her waist and rested my chin on her shoulder. “So, you come here often?” I joked and she smiled a half smile for me.
“You know it never should have come to this.” I told her. “I didn’t mean for you to take what I said so badly.”
“I didn’t do it because of what you said, so don’t go blaming yourself because I can’t handle any more guilt.”
“Well, I can’t handle you not being around anymore.” I squeezed her waist gently and she put her hands over mine. “So, don’t go doing anything stupid like that ever again, ok?”
“Ok.” She nodded.
I pressed my lips to her cheek and she brought her hand up to my face and held it there. “I have a favor to ask.”
“Ok. Ask.”
I rested my chin back on her shoulder and she let out a small sigh. “You know that I’m going to marry Kristina, right?”
“Yeah, and don’t worry, I wont cause any drama.” I understand why she would say that, but that isn’t what I was getting at.
“Well, I would like you to be my best girl?”
“Huh?” She turned around to face me and looked at me like I just said the most awful thing known to man. “Isn’t that Kristina?”
I smiled down at her. “Kristina is my best girl, yes, but in another sense. I want you to be by my side at the wedding. You know all the other girls will be bride’s maids and standing on Kristina’s side, but you, you have always been more like one of the guys, so I would love it if you would stand up for me.”
Izzy looked at me and I couldn’t tell what she was thinking, but I knew that she was. “Don’t you think that will make Kristina mad?”
“Nope. In fact, it was her idea.”
“Yeah.” She nodded. “I kinda figured you couldn’t come up with something that good on your own.”
“Hey!” I laughed and started tickling her relentlessly.
“Please! If I say yes, will you stop?”
“Uh huh.” I nodded.
“Ok, yes, but I’m not wearing a tuxedo.” I laughed and kissed her head before getting up out of the bed.
“I should go. Kristina has a stripper pole and she knows how to use it.”
Izzy laughed and sat up in the bed. “Bye Brian.”
“Bye.” I winked at her and walked out of the bedroom.
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Christ
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I was sitting on the couch when Chelsea walked in with London. The two of them had their hands full of packages. “What is all of that?” I asked pointing to all of the bags.
“Just stuff.” Chelsea said.
“That doesn’t look like just stuff.” I replied. London laughed and went into the kitchen with the bags she was carrying. “Ok, what are you two little divas up to?”
Chelsea set her bags on the ground and gave me a big smile. ‘We’re gonna have a party.”
“We are?”
She nodded and kneeled down on the floor and started rifling through her bags and pulling out decorations. “Chelsea?”
“Yes.” She answered without even looking up at me.
“When is this party taking place?”
“Tomorrow afternoon.” She smiled up at me as if it were something that I was supposed to already know. Meanwhile, it looked like wal-mart just vomited all over my living room floor.
“Do you have a cake pan?” London asked as she stood in the doorway.
I shook my head no. What the hell would I have a cake pan for? It’s not like I’ve ever baked a cake. “You’re baking a cake?”
“Of course we are, Johnny. You can’t have a party without a cake.” Chelsea answered.
“Right, how dare I. I think I’m gonna go see what The Rev is doing and leave you two to plan your little party.”
“Oh it’s not a little party.” Chelsea shook her head. “It’s gonna be a big party!”
“Ok, then.” I shook my head and walked out the door leaving the two of them to their sea of pink and purple party favors and whatever other girly stuff they had.