To Live Her Life

Océane was wide awake as the sun rose over the horizon, bringing with it and the sweltering heat. She knew she should have at least tried to sleep because of the traveling to come, but she couldn’t bare the thought of somehow missing her chance. She didn’t want to leave her brother behind, although she also didn’t want to stay at the camp as a hostage by her own people- She worried for Youri’s safety as well. He was basically a prisoner of war, nothing more, nothing less. In a blink of any eye, he could be ambushed (not that he wasn't able to defend himself anyways) and be killed.

Océane sighed as she turned on her side, directly in front of her lay Aleia and Ibrahim, all curled up next to one another. Ibrahim held on protectively to his twin sister; it pained her heart to see them like that. She sighed again and turned once more, only this time to the opposite way. She looked out in the still semi-darkened sky and land outside the tent and wondered about Youri. Was he awake? What was he doing if he was? Is he alright? Did anything happen to him last night?

Océane had, for the past 2 days, been left alone. She hadn’t heard from her eldest brother Salim; however Najib has been carefully taking and packing supplies for their “escape.” Mayine has been a bit incognito the past day, he just disappeared all day and only came back the previous night. He lay on his own makeshift bed directly across from her on the opposite side of the tiny walkway going down the center of the tent.

Slowly she made herself set up, holding in a groan from the strain that the motion had put on her bruised ribcage and achy upper body. She pulled the drenched under shirt, the equivalent of a camisole, away from her skin and basked in the brief gush of air that was pushed to circulate through before leaving once more. Her skin was grimy, sticky. The dust that covered the ground stuck to her skin much like a layer of makeup would-only it wasn’t something she welcomed to her skin, nor did it “enhance” her looks…

She stood, tiptoeing around the sleeping forms of the people all around her and then slipped out of the tent’s flap opening, unnoticed. In the distance there was a glow of the fire; near where women were certainly cooking and preparing morning meals for the male soldiers based at the base site. Her stomach growled a bit at the simple thought of a warm meal; she only ate left over mixed and blended together left overs…None of which was wonderful tasting.

Before she knew it, she was at the entrance to the small dugout that housed a prisoned Youri.She simply peaked in around a corner to make sure they’d be alone and then rushed around and down the steps quickly. She tripped up a bit at the bottom but didn’t fall. She was embarrassed as she heard him laughing at her; what else would he be laughing at anyways?

After a short time Najib showed up with a small satchel filled with pieces of bread and an apple. Youri’s wrists were freed and he began eating, it was the only sound coming from any of them. Océane sat off to the side, watching on whenever she wasn’t itching her arm- she found that doing so would leave clean lines of skin underneath. Her nails, although still short, were just long enough to “peel” off the dirt. (She didn’t even think of the collecting dirt underneath the nails until long after the fact.)

“توقف!” (Stop!) Najib scolded her, and she did instantly. She also didn’t realize that little drops of blood were surfacing from a few of the scratches. “يمكن الحصول على تنظيف أنت بالتسجيل قبل مغادرته إذا كنت تريد ، ولكن هل ستكون لدينا للانتظار.” (You can get cleaned up before leaving if you want, but you are going to have to wait.) He told her; she only nodded. A gust of wind swept through the land making sand fly and pollute the air. Océane closed her eyes, kept her mouth closed tightly after taking a big gulp of air, and brought her head down into her knees to further cover her body from the gritty, harsh, stinging sand. Her arms felt like sandpaper was being rubbed on them but it was much better that then the alternative of sand in your eyes and mouth. When it was over she peaked up and over her knees to see Youri and Najib in much the same position she had been in.

Youri winced as he felt the sand hitting, rubbing and most likely entering a few of his open wounds. He prayed it would be over soon, and luckily it was. It didn’t last long but in the creases of his clothes there were pools of sand just laying discarded. He brushed himself off thanking God that he would soon be rid of this all. He would soon be at home in the city, in his home were there wasn’t sand nor dirt. There was running water and air condition, he could easily change and clean clothes and eat real food. He was ready to get out of here. He was even happier to get Océane, Aleia and Ibrahim out of the same situation as he was in. But most importantly, it was Océane he felt the need to help the most-

He wondered what his parents would think. What his brothers and sisters would think- Will the accept her? Surely the translations between the two of them and Mayine would only last so long. He was trying to pick up Arabic but it was hard for him. He was never one for learning languages let alone one so incredibly different and much harder than the one he spoke and understood fluently. He had picked up on certain meanings associated with words to hear them; he wouldn’t be able to repeat them though.

She was only a kid, add Aleia and Ibrahim into the mix then of course Mayine- Youri was wondering what exactly he would do… He was still in the military; he devoted himself to the military. He couldn’t just walk away. If he goes to base with these Romanian men he’ll be sent home for a little while if he’s lucky, then he’ll be shipped right back out leaving the 4 Arabic’s behind in a country that hates their “kind.”

-

As the darkness encroached the 3 adults and 3 “children” walked to the clearing. They were early but it wasn’t a problem. Mayine, Youri and Océane had supplies slung over their backs while Ibrahim and Aleia walk hand in hand in front of them. Najib lead the way out in front, making sure the coast was clear as well.

Mayine had a look of dread on his face; he didn’t like the fact that they were about to leave. In fact he wasn’t too happy about it at all, he was fuming. But he couldn’t do anything about it- he would go just to get away from the war.

Youri limped along next to Océane. She helped him walk, her at his side as he lean slightly on her for more balance. The previous night hadn’t exactly been nice to him. He was almost certain he sprained if not broke a bone in his right leg- but he wasn’t about to let that stop him. He didn’t tell anyone anything as he limped along at a slightly quick pace, at least for a wounded person. He decided he would deal with it further once they all were safe but not before then. He’d deal with a lot bit of pain for the meantime.

After letting Youri down on the ground encircling the large pool of spring water, Océane pulled off her just put on, abaya over her head. She smiled widely as she sat on the edge of a large rock. Her feet danged in the clear water as she bent to scoop up some of the liquid and rub it over her arms to rid herself of the dirt. Aleia crept over and held onto the back of her shirt as she moved cautiously to sit besides her. Océane flicked a few drops at the 2 year old and she giggled like crazy, trying to get more. Océane held onto the little girl around her tummy as the toddlers hand splashed the surface of the water in front of them. The two laughed with each other until steps around them brought them back to the present.

The group of Romanian soldiers came from out of the tree covering into the open expanse of the clearing around the water.

Océane stood with a giggly Aleia cradled in her arms and walked over to where all the others stood in a large group. Her brother, Mayine and Youri were talking all she made out was the very last part “تعتني بها...” (Take care of her.) She wanted to roll her eyes but refrained reminding herself that Najib only said those things because he cared for her.

They quickly said their goodbyes. She was told to be safe and careful; she was likewise told that he would come find her once it was safe-he promised.

Océane sat Aleia on the ground and quickly hugged Najib, at first he was caught off guard but he hugged back just as tight not even a second after. She quickly pulled the long, black abaya over her head and pushed her arms through. Then she picked up and put the sash on her back. Youri looked around one last time before he was given a gun by the leader of the Romanian soldier group. And they took off.

Ibrahim was off rambling about something or another in front of a few of the soldiers. He still took notice of everything and questioned every single little thing he seen. He would look up to the soldier next to him, expecting an answer; he never got one. The man looked down at him as if the small boy was crazy; they didn’t understand a word of what he was saying. So the man would shrug and Ibrahim would take that as enough of an answer- he would precede on a few seconds, sometimes minutes, yet there would always be another question.

“هل يظنون انهم سوف يكرهوننا؟” (Do you think that they will hate us?) Océane pondered out loud. She walk next to Youri who was being helped to walk by one of the soldiers. He looked over at her and listened as Mayine translated the words he didn’t know.

“من؟” (Who?) Mayine grumbled a translation from Youri. Océane couldn’t look at either of them as they talked; she looked only to one of the men who held a sleeping Aleia in one of his arms against his chest. She just seemed to be content there-

“Ваш ... людей.” (Your… people.) Océane whispered hoping she spoke it right.See unlike Youri, she was picking up the Ukrainian language quickly. Of course it was only the words she heard being used often; yet nonetheless, she could more easily understand the other language a bit.

“Ні!” (NO!) He spoke loudly as he rapidly shook his head back and forth. Even though he was lying- there was no saying that his “people” as she said, would accept her as she is or like her…

With that a sort of deafening silence swept over them all. They continued walking on through the dirt and sand, over small patches of grass and up steep valleys to get to even taller hills. It was dark now. And the moon shone down brightly, illuminating their way. They continued on walking further until at the base of a hill, a few vehicles and an old campsite came into view. There were even more men walking around there, packing up items into the canvas covered vehicles.

As the group got closer, they become noticed. The yelling and rushing around became more evident and noticed. Talking went back and forth, back and forth between man after man after man. They all eventually gave up trying to understand what they were talking about; none understood Romanian so it was easy just to tune the strange sounds out.

Not long after that they all loaded into the vehicles. All the men looked at Mayine strangely, timid and questioning him; they didn’t quite trust him and that was evident. Océane was at least seen by them as a kid, so they treated her much differently.

Youri sat on the bench with Océane’s sleeping body lying to his side with her head on his lap. Aleia and Ibrahim were next to her, half on, half off her chest and stomach.

It was going to be a long night.

He sighed in contentment; knowing that if he let himself sleep, by the time he woke up he would be that much closer to being home in Ukraine. He couldn’t wait to get there.