Status: I started this story years ago when I was young and I'm too far now to start over. So bear with me hahaha! I added some inside jokes I should not have added. I apologize in advance hahaha!
Love Song
Chapter 45: I Never Meant For It To Mean This Much
Amy
Saturday, April 27
After today’s session, I got in my car parked behind Josh’s and followed him back to his house. I felt horrible for snapping at Jordan the way I did. I just wanted to ignore the truth. I was hurting Sean without him even realizing it. My wedding day was approaching fast and like Josh had said, I was scared. Maybe that was what made me cheat on Sean. But this had to end and that was why I was following Josh home.
I followed Josh into his house without a word and he didn’t say a whole lot either. He shut the front door and tossed his keys onto the coffee table, “Want something to drink?”
“No. I shouldn’t be here right now,” I said. Josh stopped mid-step and frowned in confusion, “I, I think we should end this Josh. I shouldn’t be doing this when I’m marrying Sean.”
Josh pushed his hair back and shook his head, “I don’t think that’s what you really want.”
His response caught me off guard, “Y-you don’t know what I want. If you did, you, you’d know what I want is…is Sean.”
“I don’t believe that,” Josh said.
“What are you trying to say Josh?” I said, “You want me to be with you?”
Josh shifted uncomfortably and he continued walking to his kitchen, “No Amy. That’s not what I was trying to say. You should go. Sean’s probably waiting for you.”
I stayed by the front door for awhile, waiting for him to come back out. When he didn’t, I sighed and let myself out. I had made a lot of things more complicated than they needed to be and I didn’t know what I was going to do anymore. Being with Josh made me suddenly question my relationship with Sean. I loved Sean with all my heart, loved him so much it hurt. But after sleeping with Josh, I didn’t think Sean and I would ever be the same. I didn’t deserve anything Sean gave me anymore. I would let Sean decide. It would all be in his hands.
Sean was in his usual spot when I got home, sitting in the living room watching TV. But when I came in, he turned off the TV and stood up to greet me, “Amy, I’m glad you’re back. How did it go today?”
“We got a lot done,” I said, tossing my purse on the couch, “Listen, I need to talk to you about something.”
“Sure,” Sean and I walked into the kitchen and sat down at the table. I folded my trembling hands on the table and couldn’t force myself to make eye contact, “So, you know how Jordan had that little get together at her house last week?”
“I remember,” he said. I took a deep, shaky breath and continued, “Well, Josh was there too and we all got really drunk and Josh and I kissed.”
Sean processed the bit of information he’d just been given and then he smiled awkwardly and grabbed my hands, “I’m glad you told me Amy. If it was just a kiss, we can move past it can’t we?”
“Well yeah but that’s not where it ended,” I mumbled. Sean’s hands stiffened in mine, “While you were at work, I went to see Josh to kind of resolve the issue and it just got worse. I, I, I ended up sleeping with Josh.”
Saturday, April 27
After today’s session, I got in my car parked behind Josh’s and followed him back to his house. I felt horrible for snapping at Jordan the way I did. I just wanted to ignore the truth. I was hurting Sean without him even realizing it. My wedding day was approaching fast and like Josh had said, I was scared. Maybe that was what made me cheat on Sean. But this had to end and that was why I was following Josh home.
I followed Josh into his house without a word and he didn’t say a whole lot either. He shut the front door and tossed his keys onto the coffee table, “Want something to drink?”
“No. I shouldn’t be here right now,” I said. Josh stopped mid-step and frowned in confusion, “I, I think we should end this Josh. I shouldn’t be doing this when I’m marrying Sean.”
Josh pushed his hair back and shook his head, “I don’t think that’s what you really want.”
His response caught me off guard, “Y-you don’t know what I want. If you did, you, you’d know what I want is…is Sean.”
“I don’t believe that,” Josh said.
“What are you trying to say Josh?” I said, “You want me to be with you?”
Josh shifted uncomfortably and he continued walking to his kitchen, “No Amy. That’s not what I was trying to say. You should go. Sean’s probably waiting for you.”
I stayed by the front door for awhile, waiting for him to come back out. When he didn’t, I sighed and let myself out. I had made a lot of things more complicated than they needed to be and I didn’t know what I was going to do anymore. Being with Josh made me suddenly question my relationship with Sean. I loved Sean with all my heart, loved him so much it hurt. But after sleeping with Josh, I didn’t think Sean and I would ever be the same. I didn’t deserve anything Sean gave me anymore. I would let Sean decide. It would all be in his hands.
Sean was in his usual spot when I got home, sitting in the living room watching TV. But when I came in, he turned off the TV and stood up to greet me, “Amy, I’m glad you’re back. How did it go today?”
“We got a lot done,” I said, tossing my purse on the couch, “Listen, I need to talk to you about something.”
“Sure,” Sean and I walked into the kitchen and sat down at the table. I folded my trembling hands on the table and couldn’t force myself to make eye contact, “So, you know how Jordan had that little get together at her house last week?”
“I remember,” he said. I took a deep, shaky breath and continued, “Well, Josh was there too and we all got really drunk and Josh and I kissed.”
Sean processed the bit of information he’d just been given and then he smiled awkwardly and grabbed my hands, “I’m glad you told me Amy. If it was just a kiss, we can move past it can’t we?”
“Well yeah but that’s not where it ended,” I mumbled. Sean’s hands stiffened in mine, “While you were at work, I went to see Josh to kind of resolve the issue and it just got worse. I, I, I ended up sleeping with Josh.”
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Amy's outfit for this chapter. Soooooo what do you think is gonna happen?!?! I already know what I'm gonna do...I think...I dunno....maybe...I am now doubting myself LOL