Status: CHAPTER SIX UP NOW. PLEASE COMMENT!
Poison
It's Good To See You Again
Labor is grueling – and no, I don’t mean any nine to five job. I’m talking about the constant, mind numbing pain that’s involved when you’re pushing a six pound-nine ounce baby girl out through your vagina. With no epidural might I add; the Doctor was late or Annalyn was early – something was off and there hadn’t been enough time for the pain medication to numb my stomach. Therefore, after six hours of pushing and being in intense pain – I heard a cry. A beautiful, amazing cry.
“Let me see her, let me see Anna,” I reached my weak arms out for my baby; but she never came to me. I only saw Jack holding a tiny bundle that cooed in his arms. “Jack… Let me see her.”
I kept calling out to him but he ignored me completely – Lost in his fatherhood. I don’t think that I knew exactly at that moment what it meant but it soon dawned on me that I meant nearly nothing to Jack now and in the next five years things were going to change drastically in our worlds. How drastically, well, that was yet to be seen.
We went how the next day and I finally got to bond with my daughter because Jack was going on tour and with Lyn only being two days only we couldn’t go – no matter how much Jack wanted to show her off. It was just going to be my baby and me for three glorious months.
Or so I thought.
Jack called everyday from eight in the morning until ten o’clock at night. He wanted to know what Anna was doing, what she was eating, if she could say daddy yet. And he constantly wanted me to take pictures of her and send them his way. I was happy for the most part that Jack wanted so… desperately to be a part of Anna’s life while he was away from home. But that was just it. He only wanted to talk about the baby – never one in the three months he was gone did he ask how I was and it was rare when he hung up the phone that he told me that he loved me.
I knew I had to talk to Jack when he got home because saying that you think there’s problems in your marriage is not something that you say over the phone. It just doesn’t go down that way. So, when Jack came home at the end of February just in time for my nineteenth birthday, which was March first; I was both excited and terrified out of my mind.
Jack met me at a restaurant in downtown Baltimore – just the two of us, so we could have some alone time and simply be with each other. I wanted to see if Jack would talk to me without Anna being around or constantly talking about her – I know she’s my baby and I love her, but I want to know that if I still had a husband that loves me too.
“Jack,” I stood up as he came walking towards the table – I tried to look my best; a small v neck black dress. I would how that I looked good with all the stares I had been getting while I waited. Jack smiled at me and hugged me tight. “I’ve missed you so much, baby.”
“I’ve missed you too, Jay,” Releasing me, Jack kissed my lips before leading me over to my seat and then sat himself down. He reached over and held me hand tightly I could feel the coldness from his gold band against my skin. “This is about me and you tonight Jay – but first I want to ask how Anna is?”
I sighed silently to myself – at least he said that tonight was strictly about me and him, “She’s great. I put her on formula last night.”
Jack nodded knowing exactly what I meant. We sat there quietly until the waiter came to get our food and drink order. Just sat there in each other’s company, hand in hand, smiling and playing footsie.
When the waiter brought our drinks, Jack started talking, “I’m sorry about how I treated you… Over the phone; I should have talked to you more and been more of a husband, instead of just a father. I love you Jade – don’t you ever forget that.”
I stared at Jack over the low candlelight the light up our table. I hadn’t even said I word to him about the way that I was feeling and yet – he knew exactly. After that, Jack made a constant effort to tell me that he loved me and that to be more loving towards me; he succeeded in this. Jack was always the best husband anyone could ever want. He would give you anything you wanted – anything at all, he was loyal – to your face, and he never forgot an important date. Jack was truly one of a kind. I apparently was one out a million.
“Let me see her, let me see Anna,” I reached my weak arms out for my baby; but she never came to me. I only saw Jack holding a tiny bundle that cooed in his arms. “Jack… Let me see her.”
I kept calling out to him but he ignored me completely – Lost in his fatherhood. I don’t think that I knew exactly at that moment what it meant but it soon dawned on me that I meant nearly nothing to Jack now and in the next five years things were going to change drastically in our worlds. How drastically, well, that was yet to be seen.
We went how the next day and I finally got to bond with my daughter because Jack was going on tour and with Lyn only being two days only we couldn’t go – no matter how much Jack wanted to show her off. It was just going to be my baby and me for three glorious months.
Or so I thought.
Jack called everyday from eight in the morning until ten o’clock at night. He wanted to know what Anna was doing, what she was eating, if she could say daddy yet. And he constantly wanted me to take pictures of her and send them his way. I was happy for the most part that Jack wanted so… desperately to be a part of Anna’s life while he was away from home. But that was just it. He only wanted to talk about the baby – never one in the three months he was gone did he ask how I was and it was rare when he hung up the phone that he told me that he loved me.
I knew I had to talk to Jack when he got home because saying that you think there’s problems in your marriage is not something that you say over the phone. It just doesn’t go down that way. So, when Jack came home at the end of February just in time for my nineteenth birthday, which was March first; I was both excited and terrified out of my mind.
Jack met me at a restaurant in downtown Baltimore – just the two of us, so we could have some alone time and simply be with each other. I wanted to see if Jack would talk to me without Anna being around or constantly talking about her – I know she’s my baby and I love her, but I want to know that if I still had a husband that loves me too.
“Jack,” I stood up as he came walking towards the table – I tried to look my best; a small v neck black dress. I would how that I looked good with all the stares I had been getting while I waited. Jack smiled at me and hugged me tight. “I’ve missed you so much, baby.”
“I’ve missed you too, Jay,” Releasing me, Jack kissed my lips before leading me over to my seat and then sat himself down. He reached over and held me hand tightly I could feel the coldness from his gold band against my skin. “This is about me and you tonight Jay – but first I want to ask how Anna is?”
I sighed silently to myself – at least he said that tonight was strictly about me and him, “She’s great. I put her on formula last night.”
Jack nodded knowing exactly what I meant. We sat there quietly until the waiter came to get our food and drink order. Just sat there in each other’s company, hand in hand, smiling and playing footsie.
When the waiter brought our drinks, Jack started talking, “I’m sorry about how I treated you… Over the phone; I should have talked to you more and been more of a husband, instead of just a father. I love you Jade – don’t you ever forget that.”
I stared at Jack over the low candlelight the light up our table. I hadn’t even said I word to him about the way that I was feeling and yet – he knew exactly. After that, Jack made a constant effort to tell me that he loved me and that to be more loving towards me; he succeeded in this. Jack was always the best husband anyone could ever want. He would give you anything you wanted – anything at all, he was loyal – to your face, and he never forgot an important date. Jack was truly one of a kind. I apparently was one out a million.
♠ ♠ ♠
Annalyn's full name is Annalyn Joy Barakat (for the fyi)<3