The Movies Make It Look Easy

Chapter 50

Shannon’s P.O.V:

The taxi pulled up outside a large, austere white building. I slowly got out of the car and stood staring at the imposing building in front of me as Nick paid the fare.
It had a foreboding air about it that made me want to shiver…but then that was probably just me.
Nick ushered me inside the automatic glass doors.
I looked around me with interest, taking in the white walls, glistening floors and the men and women walking around wearing scrubs. There were a few other people who were clearly patients; some were in wheelchairs and some just strolled down the corridors.
There was a feeling of sickness and sorrow permeating the place, as if the feeling had sunk into the very walls. I hated hospitals.
Nick raised a hand in greeting to the middle aged woman behind the reception desk. She smiled warmly at us before going back to work – Nick obviously didn’t need directions. He turned left, down a long plain white corridor.
It felt like something out of a horror movie…have I mentioned that I hate hospitals?
It was harshly lit with fluorescent lights, giving our skin an awful greenish tinge. We continued on down the corridor, occasionally moving to the side to allow doctors and nurses past. We travelled up to the third floor, Nick’s steps assured. I vaguely wondered how many times he’d made this trip.
Finally, he came to a stop outside the second last door on the left. There was a small window in the centre of the door, and through it I could glimpse the end of a bed.
We were really here.
If I moved a bit to the left I knew I’d have an unobstructed view of the room, but I stopped myself, we’d go inside soon enough. However, Nick made no move to open the door. He was watching me closely and I smiled weakly in return. He didn’t even glance at the door, just stepped closer to me.
I just hoped he couldn’t sense my uneasiness.
I tilted my head back to meet his gaze. He slipped his arms around my waist and rested his forehead against mine. ‘I can’t tell you how much it means to me that you’re here’
I reached up and wrapped my arms around his neck; ‘I’d do anything for you Nick, you have to know that by now’
He smiled, ‘I know, because I feel the exact same way’ he was silent for a moment, thinking over his next words.
‘I-I’ve never brought anyone here, not even Mark, not since she slipped into a coma’ he trailed off and I smiled slightly. ‘I understand’
With that, he kissed me. It was different somehow, more…meaningful or something.
Unfortunately, it couldn’t last – we were right outside Nick’s mother’s room after all.

He opened the door and we stepped inside.
It was a medium-sized room with a wide window that covered most of the far wall. It had drab office blinds that could be drawn the whole way across. There was a slightly wilted green plant taking pride-of-place on the bedside table, and on the right wall, above the bed was a colourful summer landscape done in what looked like oils. It was no doubt placed there in an attempt to brighten the otherwise plain room.
What struck me as my eyes roamed around the room was the lack of personal items adorning the space. According to Nick, his mother had been in a vegetative state for three years and his father visited all the time. Hell, the only reason she was still alive was because Jonah loved his wife too much to let her go.
So why weren’t there any personal touches added to the room to make it more comfortable, homier? As it was, the room could belong to anyone.

Finally, my eyes came to rest on the bed, and more importantly, who was in the bed. The first thing I noticed as I gazed at Nick’s mother – Sarah King – was how frail she looked.
Her cheeks were sunken, the skin of her face stretched tightly across her skull. The hands placed perfectly on either side of her narrow form were wizened, and looked as if they should belong to someone much older – they almost seemed to fade into the stark white of the blanket covering most of her body, and her skin was strangely translucent, making her blue veins more visible. Her shoulder length brown hair, dull and lifeless, neatly framed her face - it looked like someone had purposefully brushed it that way. The sickening image of a child arranging a doll popped into my mind before I could quell it.
What I found saddest as I stared at the woman before me was that I knew that she hadn’t always looked like this. Nick had shown me an old, bent and slightly faded photograph of his mother with her arms around him. He must have only been five at the time, and they both looked so happy.
It was horrible to see what she had become, what disease had reduced her to. No longer was she a laughing woman, the love clear in her eyes as she embraced her only child.
I continued to stare at her – the blank look on her face and the slight downward tilt to her lips.
I knew that were her eyes open, they’d be the exact same shade of brown as Nick’s, though I knew without a doubt that they wouldn’t have the same gold and green flecks in them as his, and they never would.

Movement to my left caught my attention and I dragged my gaze away from the woman in the bed to Nick, who tentatively took a step towards his mother. I gave his hand one last squeeze before letting go and taking a small step back. I wanted to at least give him the illusion of privacy.
For all his talk about the person lying silently in the hospital bed before us not being his mother, I knew it was hard for him. It dredged up memories he wished he could forget, and made him realise all that he’d lost.
He stepped forward slowly, coming to a stop when he reached the head of the bed.
He stood for a moment and just looked down at his mother, his face carefully blank, and his fingers twitching slightly.
At last he bent down and placed a soft kiss to the paper white skin of her cheek.
I could almost imagine a younger Nick kissing his mother’s cheek and smiling up at her adorably as she pulled him into her arms and told him how much she loved him. I pushed the images aside, feeling a knot beginning to form inside my chest.
I wrapped my arms around myself as I watched the scene in front of me. I couldn’t even begin to imagine what it must feel like to be in his situation.
Nick pulled the only chair in the room up to the side of the bed and sat down, slipping his hand through one of hers. He stayed like that for a moment, his head bowed before glancing back at me. A small smile played across his lips before he turned back and leant close to his mother.
He began murmuring close to her ear, an unrecognisable emotion crossing his face as he spoke. It was too quiet for me to hear the exact words but I could tell he was talking about me.
I stepped over to the windows, not wanting to stare at him.

The room overlooked the street and I stood there watching people go about their lives, oblivious to anything but their own worries. Because we were only on the third floor, I could see each person clearly as they passed by, wincing slightly as a large man bashed into a woman, almost knocking her to the ground.
Even as I winced though, I couldn’t help feeling that the whole scene was…insignificant somehow. I blinked, trying to rid myself of my morbid thoughts.
I don’t know how long I stood there, staring blankly out the window before I felt a familiar pair of arms slip around my waist. I leant back against him and I felt the whisper of his lips in my hair. My eyes fell shut as we stood there. All my depressing thoughts melted away as I focused on him.
‘I’m just sorry she never got to meet you’ he spoke quietly, surprising me as his breath tickled my ear.
I looked back over to the bed and sighed; ‘me too’
I turned in his embrace, wrapping my arms tightly around his shoulders and resting my head in the hollow of his neck. We didn’t speak for a long time after that, lost in our thoughts, anchored only by each other.

‘I’m hungry’ Nick eventually said randomly, making me look up at him in disbelief.
‘We just ate before coming. How could you possibly be hungry?’
How could he even think about eating after the lunch he’d had?
He chuckled, pulling me closer; ‘I’m a guy, I eat a lot’
I snorted, ‘understatement’
‘I think I’ll go downstairs and get some snacks. Do you want something?’
I shook my head, extracting myself from his arms.
He turned for the door before stopping in his tracks and glancing over to the bed and then back to me.
‘Will you be alright here? You can come down with me if you want…’
I shook my head, a small smile pulling at my lips. ‘I’ll be fine’
With a nod, he disappeared out the door, closing it behind him.

My eyes were drawn to the bed and I took a slow step towards the chair Nick had vacated.
Silence reigned in the room as I sat down.
I suddenly got the urge to talk to the woman lying immobile in the bed, even if she couldn’t hear me. I wanted to tell her about Nick, tell her about our life, and most importantly, I wanted to tell her how much I loved her son. I felt like she deserved to know.
I couldn’t make the words come out though; it was like my throat had closed over.
I settled for reaching out and clasping her limp hand in mine – he skin was dry and cool to the touch. I hoped that somehow, my small gesture would convey everything I was feeling…even though I knew it was just wishful thinking. I mean, how could she possibly know?
Once more, a feeling of the deepest sadness washed over me, and I felt tears sting the back of my eyes.
In an attempt to stem the rising tide within me, I transferred my gaze to the landscape hanging slightly crookedly above the bed. It really was the only bright spot in the room.
It featured a dirt track surrounded by rolling green hills that were dotted with bright flowers and an array of foliage. The sun shone in an azure blue sky, and brought my attention to the window where I could see the day had slowly been darkening since we’d arrived. Any hint of sun had long since disappeared behind a thick grey blanket of cloud.
From where I sat, I could see that the left corner of the wall, just below where it met the ceiling, was beginning to flake, showing patches of dull grey next to the bright white of the rest of the room.
I was itching to go find a gift shop and buy the brightest flower they had.

However, before I could decide whether or not to go on a flower hunt, I heard the door open. I turned, a smile growing on my face, glad to see him again.
My smile was short-lived.
Any traces of happiness immediately dropped from my face and all I had time to think was, crap before the man frozen in the doorway spoke.
‘Who the hell are you?’ he snarled, his face twisted into a harsh grimace.
He was wearing a brown trench over a blue shirt and a pair of casual black pants. The word that would best describe his somewhat mismatched ensemble was shabby.
He obviously hadn’t shaved in a while and his overgrown hair was darker than his son’s. His eyes too were a shade of icy blue instead of a warm brown.
I jumped out of my seat. ‘Mr. King?’
I knew it was him, despite the obvious differences; his face was so similar to Nick’s that he couldn’t be anybody else.
Jonah King regarded me suspiciously, anger glimmering in his eyes.
I stepped closer to him, slowly holding my hand out; ‘my name is Shannon, I’m Nick’s…roommate’ I said hesitantly.
He completely ignored my outstretched hand, brushing past me to take the seat I’d been occupying less than a minute before. He took his wife’s hand and I couldn’t help but raise my eyebrows at his abrupt and rude demeanour.
‘My son is here?’ he spoke suddenly, his gruff tone cold.
I approached the bed again, this time skirting around to the right, wanting to put some space between us.
‘Yes, he just went to…’
He cut me off, ‘it’s about time he came to visit his mother. She misses him’
I wasn’t sure if he was talking to himself or me.
I decided to persevere; ‘I’m sorry, that was my fault. He wanted to come sooner but he spent Christmas with me…’ I trailed off lamely as Nick’s dad looked from his wife, finally paying attention to the relative stranger standing awkwardly across the bed from him.
I couldn’t help but notice how, washed out he looked.
He seemed a lot older than he actually was, as if he’d aged prematurely along with his wife.
‘Where are you from?’ some of the rudeness had drained from his voice, but he was hardly being friendly.
‘Um…Ireland’ I tried to smile winningly but it didn’t last long.
‘And you’re my son’s roommate at college?’ he sounded doubtful and I felt myself blush as I nodded in affirmation.
‘It looks like you’re more than that’ he said quietly, a strange tiredness seeming to come over him.
It was that tiredness – and remorse? – that made me believe that somewhere deep inside, he still loved Nick.
I didn’t say anything and we were both silent for what seemed like minutes, hours even, but could only have lasted mere seconds.

Suddenly his posture tensed, as if some argument inside him had been decided, and his tone was as nasty as his words; ‘well, you’re probably too good for him. You should get out while you still can’
My mouth dropped and I stared at Jonah King in surprise.
‘With all due respect Mr. King’ I began, making him snort in derision. My eyes narrowed in anger as I continued; ‘your son is the nicest, sweetest, and most genuine person you could hope to meet. He’s a good guy. The best actually’
I’m surprised he didn’t roll his eyes. That of course just made me angrier, feeling suddenly protective over Nick - even if that meant protecting him from his own father.
‘I’ve seen Nick at his best and his worst and can honestly say that I wouldn’t change a thing’
‘You say that now. Wait until he does something to break your innocent little heart’
I shrugged, his condescending tone pissing me off; ‘I suppose that’s a chance I’m willing to take’
A small part of my mind found it strange that it was around this man that I was most open about my feelings for Nick.
‘But I don’t think it’s me you should be worrying about – I can take care of myself’ I continued, watching him closely for any sort of a reaction.
He glared at me across the bed but I ignored it, I had to say something. ‘One day you’ll turn around and he’ll be gone and then you’ll regret not having any sort of a relationship with him, you’ll regret not making the effort to get to know your only son’
Jonah didn’t reply, just looked back to his wife, reaching out to brush a stray hair back from her face. I couldn’t help but notice the lines of tension along his jaw.

The silence quickly became tense and when the door finally opened again, I felt relief that I wouldn’t have to be alone with this man anymore. I also had a sense of impending doom as Nick slowly walked into the room.
Part of me wanted to somehow get him back out the door before he noticed his father’s presence. He was looking down as he stuffed what seemed to be copious amounts of food into his pockets.
‘I know you said you didn’t want anything but…’ he looked up, a small grin on his face and immediately froze mid-stride, something close to terror flashing across his face as he stared at us.
‘Dad?’ he sounded choked, like he could barely get the words out.
I stared at his astonished face in sympathy as Jonah nodded curtly. ‘Nick’
‘Why- why are you here?’
I walked over to him, taking his hand as he continued to stare at his father.
‘I’m busy on Thursday so I decided to come today. I can assure you, I didn’t know you’d be here’
Nick didn’t exactly flinch but something about him just…drooped.
I squeezed his hand and he looked down, an unexpected smile breaking out on his face; ‘come on Sweetheart, let’s go home’
Jonah looked almost surprised, as if that wasn’t the reaction he’d been expecting.
‘It was nice to meet you’ I said sweetly before we turned to leave.
‘Remember what I said’ he called after us.
I looked back over my shoulder to see him watching us with a frown etched onto his features. ‘Likewise’
I walked out of the hospital room, pulling a confused Nick after me. I sent a smile in his direction but it was weak.
I knew that the chances of Jonah changing his attitude were unfortunately slim to none. At least I’d tried, I consoled myself, some people were beyond help.

I waited until we’d finally exited the building before speaking; ‘so what did you get? I’m craving chocolate right now’ I grinned, taking a deep breath of fresh air.
Nick silently pulled a Kinder Bueno from his pocket and handed it over, staring at me in disbelief.
We stood in the middle of the pavement, earning many irritated looks as people were forced to dodge around us. I didn’t care even a little bit…people were far too lazy these days (and yes, I wasn’t exactly one to talk).
I’d eaten two squares before he actually said anything.
‘Did that just happen?’
‘Yup’ I nodded, already feeling the calming effects of the chocolate taking over.
He bent to kiss me sweetly, tucking my hair behind my ear.
‘I’m sorry’ he breathed, leaning his forehead against mine and enclosing me in a tight embrace.
I shrugged as best I could, snuggling closer to him; ‘don’t be. Your dad and I had a nice little chat’
Nick snorted, ‘nothing my dad does is nice’
I just shrugged again, eating another square of chocolate.
‘What did you talk about?’
‘He asked where I was from, you know, the usual’ I told him flippantly, carefully avoiding his gaze. I wasn’t about to tell him what we’d been talking about, he’d be crushed. It was one thing knowing something, but it was far more hurtful when you actually heard it for yourself. I wasn’t about to do that to him.
‘What aren’t you telling me Sweetheart? What did you both mean when we were leaving?’
‘Nothing. Don’t worry about it’ I said.
He opened his mouth to argue but I kissed him instead. When I pulled away, I just looked at him for a moment.
‘Just trust me’ I whispered.
He nodded slowly before pulling away slightly to wrap an arm around my shoulders.
I glanced up, searching for the window to the room we’d just left. When my eyes located the right window, I was almost certain I saw a dark shape retreating away from the glass. I just shook my head, sure I was imagining things.

We began to walk down the street, arms wrapped around each other to ward off the chill, neither of us in any hurry to get a taxi.
Our apartment would still be waiting for us whenever we chose to go home.