I'm Just Going to Act Like I Know What This Is

Alex held tightly onto Andrea’s hands, walking backwards in front of her as they slowly walked from one side of the room to the other as Jake followed behind her in case she fell. Andrea was gripping Alex’s hands so hard it was hurting him, but he said nothing and focused on watching her feet move across the carpet. He was sure after this session he wouldn’t be able to feel his hands for a while, but he didn’t care. It was all for her.

He’d do anything for her and he wasn’t afraid to show that – the same could be said about Andrea.

Talking a deep shaky breath she kept walking forward slowly. Her teeth dug deep into her lip to stop any tears from falling. She had given up on hiding them away from Alex in this room; but now she didn’t want them to fall because it would only blur her vision. A fall right now would be bad, very bad. Possibly even worse with her right knee weeping slowly like it was.

She could almost feel it weeping as she walked and that feeling almost made her skin crawl. She was still yet to tell Alex about it. She was thinking on it before and wandered if she should tell him or not. She figured that he was worried enough already, why worry him more?

And she also wondered if Kassie said anything to him about it, Andrea was sure she didn’t; Alex would of had said something about it by now. At the moment it wasn’t really that bad, it wasn’t like it was pouring liquid, but still it was enough to worry her.

Weeping usually meant infection – though the doctor said so far she didn’t have one.

They reached the end of the room and Andrea loosened her grip very slightly from his hands. She looked at their linked hands and noticed how red his was. She frowned while rubbed her thumbs over the back of his palms as an apology. Alex smiled looking down at their hands too. He knew she didn’t mean it.

“That was great Andrea.” Jake smiled gaining both of their attention. “If you continue to do this good you’ll be walking on your own before you know it.”

Andrea couldn’t help but beam at him and nodded in thanks as Alex looked surprised, which was quickly taken over by a bright smile. If he could, he would wrap her up in a huge hug – but he couldn’t, not at the moment.

“Now, which exercise would you like to do next?” Jake asked.

Andrea looked around the room slowly and tried not to frown. Why did physio sessions seem like they take forever?

*~*~*

Sitting in the bed Andrea stared at the bunch of pink and white roses on her bedside table that Alex had got her that morning. To say she really liked them was almost an understatement. Ever since she first started going to hospital for her knees flowers became something she loved. When she was alone at the hospital, they made her feel like she wasn’t. They brightened up her room and her mood and other than the people she loved; it made her keep going while being there. They had that much of an impact she almost felt safe with them all in her room.

Most people didn’t understand that, but she didn’t care really. She understood it, Kassie understood it and so did Alex; really that’s what mattered to her.

“Left knee all done.” The nurse smiled gently pulling the blanket back over Andrea’s leg.

Andrea looked away from the flowers to the lady and smiled before watching as the nurse walked around to the other side of her bed to re-bandage her right knee. Andrea knew at five o’clock the nurse would be in to change them and so, Andrea came up with some excuse for Alex to leave the room to get some chocolate from the hospital cafe.

She felt bad; really bad for doing that, but at the same time she didn’t want Alex knowing about her knee yet. If he did stay, he would have easily noticed something wasn’t completely right. Andrea wanted to keep quiet about this – at least until she knew the cause of why it was weeping.

“How is it?” Andrea asked quietly as the nurse slowly pulled the old bandage off.
“Still a little red and weeping slowly...” The nurse trailed off. “I’ll have to talk to you doctor about this again; I swear it looks infected.” She sighed shaking her head.

The nurse turned around and picked up something from the trolley she had.

“Would you like me to clean it out again? Did that help last time?”
“Yes please and it did help.” Andrea nodded.

The lady smiled and stated cleaning and bandaging the area. Andrea looked away from her knee – at the moment she really didn’t want to look at it. Once again she sat staring at the flowers.

It took around ten minutes for the nurse to have done what she needed to do and left the room letting Andrea relax a little in her bed. Next to having showers and the physio sessions; having her knees re-bandaged was one of the worst things about being in hospital. But there was nothing she could do about it; she had to put up with it.

“Look who I found.” Alex smiled walking happily into the room.

Alex walked straight to Andrea, kiss her cheek and place the block of chocolate on her lap smiling. Andrea smiled back and then looked at who Alex had ‘found’. Jack beamed at her and gave a childish wave.

“You have no idea how much this hospital is a maze!” Jack complained. “I must have gotten lost six times trying to find this room again.”

Andrea and Alex started laughing and Jack rolled his eyes plopping himself in one of the chairs. He quickly turned the TV on and started flipping though the channels. Andrea turned her head to look at Alex with a small smile spread across her face.

“Thanks for the chocolate.”
“You’re welcome.” Alex smiled. “I have something else for you too.” He winked.

Andrea raised her eyebrows confused now noticing that Alex had one hand around his back. Alex chuckled and moved his hand out from behind him and placed a while orchid in her hands. Andrea looked at it shock for a second before looking up at Alex smiling.

“Thank you, it’s beautiful.”

Alex smiled and leaned closer to Andrea’s ear.

“Of course, not as beautiful as you.” He whispered.

Andrea flushed and hit his arm. Alex laughed and quickly leant down more placing his lips to hers – the first time since leaving on tour. Andrea let her eyes fluttered closed and kissed back smiling.

Jack made a mix of ‘awe’ and gagging noises. Alex smiled against her lips and flipped Jack off making him gasp in fake shock. Andrea ignored the noises...

And the bad feeling in her chest for not telling Alex yet.