Status: looking for the most authors I can get!
Inside...
Secret 27
Dear Father Figure,
I had spoken to you the morning of about attending my graduation. Adressed the ticket to your house while on the phone. I woke up that next morning with a voicemail from your cell phone. It was nothing special. just this and that.
I drove home for lunch to find out that you had put a .45 to your head and pulled the trigger. You left me here. on this earth. with nothing but a voicemail and the image of your body lingering in my mind every day and every night. I can't do anything without you just popping right back into my head.
turn the radio on? it's kings of leon. try to watch a movie? it's one watched together. Driving to school? the smell of my marlboro light mixing with the taste of my coffee brings me right back into your kitchen.
before this I had purpose. I had dreams. I had goals. Now I am just following the path I had cut out for myself simply because I don't know what else to do. I find myself standing and wondering why I'm not sitting. I walk in circles because I am restless for a reason that I dont even know. I would do absolutely anything to rewind time to just spend another hour with you. another easy sunday morning on your porch swing with a mimosa and a cigarette, nursing our hangovers, and talking about the future.
I regret not answering your phone call that night. Not being awake to hear my phone ring. maybe I would hear the sadness in your voice and gone to your house. Maybe I could have kept you on the phone long enough to realize the people you love that you left behind. I hope getting away from what ever was troubling you was worth leaving us in pain.
I miss you forever,
your god daughter
I had spoken to you the morning of about attending my graduation. Adressed the ticket to your house while on the phone. I woke up that next morning with a voicemail from your cell phone. It was nothing special. just this and that.
I drove home for lunch to find out that you had put a .45 to your head and pulled the trigger. You left me here. on this earth. with nothing but a voicemail and the image of your body lingering in my mind every day and every night. I can't do anything without you just popping right back into my head.
turn the radio on? it's kings of leon. try to watch a movie? it's one watched together. Driving to school? the smell of my marlboro light mixing with the taste of my coffee brings me right back into your kitchen.
before this I had purpose. I had dreams. I had goals. Now I am just following the path I had cut out for myself simply because I don't know what else to do. I find myself standing and wondering why I'm not sitting. I walk in circles because I am restless for a reason that I dont even know. I would do absolutely anything to rewind time to just spend another hour with you. another easy sunday morning on your porch swing with a mimosa and a cigarette, nursing our hangovers, and talking about the future.
I regret not answering your phone call that night. Not being awake to hear my phone ring. maybe I would hear the sadness in your voice and gone to your house. Maybe I could have kept you on the phone long enough to realize the people you love that you left behind. I hope getting away from what ever was troubling you was worth leaving us in pain.
I miss you forever,
your god daughter