Status: Completed and active
My Little Decoy
Close your eyes and make believe This is where you wanna be
Kay
Indecision, insecurities, confusion, hesitation and doubts. Doubts, that was how it started, and how I knew it would end. You may judge me for what you like, but I’m not entirely blameworthy. He was using me just as much as I was using him. He knew it and I knew it, but we simply kept this quite harmful truth quiet from each other, nothing is as ever as bad until it’s said out loud. And in those last couple days before it really did end, and we were be sitting in his room, just watching each other; me watching the doubts and fear flicker across his face, and him watching me, scared I would disappear. We both needed each other. Well, that’s what I keep telling myself at least, it’s a lot easier than to remind myself of the truth – that he was nothing to me, but my little decoy.
*
Chase
It was almost sheer insanity that drove Chase too the club that night. His stomach still ached from the pounding he had taken five minutes earlier, his own blood clogging up in his fingernails. But he had nowhere else to go, and despite everything his father had threatened, the bouncer was still too afraid to not let the son of the club’s owner through. He inhaled deeply and stepped through the doors, only to be swallowed up by an automatic bubble of loud music and smoke. Two dealer girls that looked like they could be anywhere from thirteen to seventeen glided up beside him and were waving green pills in his face. The lights changed and it only took one menacing stare of Chase’s bloodshot eyes to shoo them away. He sulked towards the private rooms feeling almost desperate for some kind of release from the anger and pain he felt. He had his wrists ready and his thumb on the double inched blade in his pocket when he saw her.
She was just another face in the crowd, dressed to kill with a simple black dress that just managed to cover her in all the wrong places and matching long hair that hung freely down her back. It must have been the way she was dancing that caught his attention – slowly, as if she was moving to another whole slow type of magical beat together. Or was it the way she was smiling, - her eyes lasering an imaginary line connected to his own. He smiled crookedly to himself as he stepped toward the dance floor, totally drawn in by her hypnotic stare. His eyes never left hers as they moved slowly towards each other, neither saying a word. Hell, he must have looked a mess, only having been beaten to a pulp so many minutes earlier, but one glance into her milky blue glare and he forgot everything.
He wrapped his arms around her waist, not surprised at all when she didn’t protest. Instead she only pulled him closer.
“You’ve never been so used as I’m using you, abusing you my little decoy,” and Chase held her tighter but the music was so loud he could feel it pulsating through his skin and her words were lost too the sound. Then, he had figured it didn’t mean anything anyway, just words said at the heat of the moment. If only he knew how wrong he had been.
Indecision, insecurities, confusion, hesitation and doubts. Doubts, that was how it started, and how I knew it would end. You may judge me for what you like, but I’m not entirely blameworthy. He was using me just as much as I was using him. He knew it and I knew it, but we simply kept this quite harmful truth quiet from each other, nothing is as ever as bad until it’s said out loud. And in those last couple days before it really did end, and we were be sitting in his room, just watching each other; me watching the doubts and fear flicker across his face, and him watching me, scared I would disappear. We both needed each other. Well, that’s what I keep telling myself at least, it’s a lot easier than to remind myself of the truth – that he was nothing to me, but my little decoy.
*
Chase
It was almost sheer insanity that drove Chase too the club that night. His stomach still ached from the pounding he had taken five minutes earlier, his own blood clogging up in his fingernails. But he had nowhere else to go, and despite everything his father had threatened, the bouncer was still too afraid to not let the son of the club’s owner through. He inhaled deeply and stepped through the doors, only to be swallowed up by an automatic bubble of loud music and smoke. Two dealer girls that looked like they could be anywhere from thirteen to seventeen glided up beside him and were waving green pills in his face. The lights changed and it only took one menacing stare of Chase’s bloodshot eyes to shoo them away. He sulked towards the private rooms feeling almost desperate for some kind of release from the anger and pain he felt. He had his wrists ready and his thumb on the double inched blade in his pocket when he saw her.
She was just another face in the crowd, dressed to kill with a simple black dress that just managed to cover her in all the wrong places and matching long hair that hung freely down her back. It must have been the way she was dancing that caught his attention – slowly, as if she was moving to another whole slow type of magical beat together. Or was it the way she was smiling, - her eyes lasering an imaginary line connected to his own. He smiled crookedly to himself as he stepped toward the dance floor, totally drawn in by her hypnotic stare. His eyes never left hers as they moved slowly towards each other, neither saying a word. Hell, he must have looked a mess, only having been beaten to a pulp so many minutes earlier, but one glance into her milky blue glare and he forgot everything.
He wrapped his arms around her waist, not surprised at all when she didn’t protest. Instead she only pulled him closer.
“You’ve never been so used as I’m using you, abusing you my little decoy,” and Chase held her tighter but the music was so loud he could feel it pulsating through his skin and her words were lost too the sound. Then, he had figured it didn’t mean anything anyway, just words said at the heat of the moment. If only he knew how wrong he had been.
♠ ♠ ♠
Word Count: 562