Status: Active
Chain Mail and Butterfly Wings
Celeste
The next morning came and when I awoke I found the grouchy old herbalist in my room--in fact I woke up because she was in my room. Mostly because she ripped the blankets off of me and started checking me over. She slapped a meaty hand on my forehead and I glared at her--her hand was freezing. She glared back and continued her work.
“Why so sour Angel?” I heard Aiden ask and turned my glare on him. He smirked.
“Well, I woke up to some old woman groping me--Ow!” I glared at the woman a second time and she smiled evilly to herself, pretending as if she hadn’t just pinched my leg to the point where it would probably bruise.
Aiden made a tsking sound and shook his head before saying, “You shouldn’t talk like that about such nice people Angel, especially when they’re helping you. It’s not very charming.”
I rolled my eyes and ignored him.
Another few minutes passed and the woman finally left me alone. “She’s fine to travel,” she informed Aiden, as if I weren’t even there. I was almost certain that she was doing that to irritate me.
“Thank you very much for your patience,” Aiden said politely, smiling charmingly at the woman.
She nodded gruffly and looked at me with a lasting scowl. “No strenuous activity though, just in case,” she looked at Aiden again, “Go to sleep early and make sure she gets plenty of rest.”
“I’ll make sure of that, thank you.”
Then she turned and left, closing the door lightly behind her.
“So, Angel? What do you say?” Aiden asked with raised brows, “Should we leave immediately or do you want to do something before we leave?”
“We should probably leave in a little while, I mean, you probably want to say goodbye to your parents, right?” I asked, pushing my legs over the side of the bed and sitting up.
Aiden shrugged. “They’re gone for the moment, they had business in a nearby town and left early this morning. So, we can leave whenever you’re ready,” he told me with a pleasant smile and unreadable eyes.
I walked over to the trunk at the end of my bed and began to stuff all of my things into a travel pack--making sure to lay my father’s chain mail on top. “Are you already packed?” I asked Aiden as I closed my bag.
“Indeed, I’ve been packed for a few days actually.” He looked at the skeptical look on my face and smiled, grabbed my chin with his fingers and flashed a dazzling smile at me. “Not that I was planning on leaving without you, my lovely companion. But you never know when you have to leave in a hurry.”
“Right,” I said, rolling my eyes and pulling my chin free of his fingertips. “So let’s get out of here shall we?” I walked toward the door and didn’t even hear Aiden as he followed me out into the hall.
“Just a moment Angel,” Aiden said, grabbing my shoulder from behind and keeping me from moving any further. I stumbled slightly and stopped with a scowl of annoyance and Aiden pushed past me, entered a room and came out with his usual travel bag and an extra burlap sack. “Ready,” he announced cheerily and led me down the hall to where I assumed the front door would be.
Once we had exited the house, I started toward the guarded gate, but Aiden caught my shoulder yet again. “Ah, ah, not yet, my mother left us gifts,” he said cheerily and I eyed him suspiciously. What sort of gift would she leave for us outside of the house? Hopefully it wouldn’t be too extreme…However, knowing Mrs. Stone as I did, she probably lived and breathed “extreme”, much like Aiden, of course.
I didn’t ask though, I just followed him to the left side of the house and grimaced as the stables came into view, “Aiden,” I warned as he proceeded toward it, “you can’t be serious,” I couldn’t keep the smile from my lips even though I didn’t exactly want a gift that was so expensive.
He turned and looked at me over his shoulder, his eyes wide with feigned innocence. “What ever could you be talking about, Angel?” he asked, a smirk playing on the edge of his lips.
Following at a slightly quicker pace than before, I marched into the stables and stopped short when I realized that Aiden had continued around the side where two beautiful horses were standing saddled and pawing exasperatedly at the ground. One was a huge black gelding and the other was a buckskin mare with a white mane and tail.
Awestruck, I wandered over to the mare and held my hand out, completely ignoring Aiden as he spoke to me. Who cared what he had to say when there was an amazing horse standing right in front of me?
However, my ignoring didn’t seem to go so well, since I happened to have my little petting excursion thwarted by the large gelding, who so violently snapped at my hand. I instantly pulled back and staggered backwards until I bumped into Aiden.
Who reacted by laughing at me, rather being the gentleman who pulled me behind him and said, “Get back you fiend!” Nope, he laughed at me, and the gelding seemed just as amused at my reaction, bobbing its head up and down and pawing at the ground. It could have been an angry gesture too. I wasn’t sure.
“What the hell?” I demanded, elbowing Aiden in the stomach to cease his laughter.
“I’m sorry Angel, but, I tried to warn you. He’s a bit protective of that mare,” Aiden explained with a lasting smile on his lips.
I eyed the gelding again and he simply nibbled at the grass near his feet, looking the part of an “innocent” animal. I walked a wide circle around the gelding and he watched me from the corner of his eye, however he didn’t make any threatening movements toward me this time. That might have had something to do with Aiden’s presence beside him though.
Content with the gelding’s sudden change of personality, I approached the mare and held my hand out absently. A smile curled onto my face when her lips brushed over my hand, obviously looking for food of some sort. When she realized I had nothing, she went back to nibbling at the grass around her.
“She’s beautiful…” I muttered and stroked her neck awestruck.
“You like her?” Aiden asked, coming up beside me without making a sound.
“Of course,” I stated, sounding a little cross, although I hadn’t meant to.
“Good…You know, she doesn’t even have a name yet…” Aiden hinted and I looked up sharply, obviously surprised.
“I get to name her too?” I asked incredulously and Aiden nodded, clearly thrilled at my reaction. I pulled back the excitement a little bit and squared my shoulders as I thought of a name. After a minute or so of silence, I produced, “Celeste.”
“Celeste?”
“Yes, Celeste, that’s her name,” I decided, now that I had spoken it aloud, it seemed like the name would stick.
“That’s an excellent name,” Aiden praised, sounding genuine, which pulled a smile onto my face of which I couldn’t seem to stop.
I cleared my throat and wiped the goofy smile from my lips, gave the black gelding one last glare and mounted Celeste with ease. “Shall we go?” I asked, pride swelling in me despite myself.
Aiden smiled at me from the ground and nodded. “Of course.” Not a moment later, he mounted his significantly larger horse with ten times the grace I had attempted to flaunt. He threw his trademark smirk in my direction and I ignored him, urging my mare forward as if I hadn’t been watching him, hoping that he might tumble over the saddle and land on the ground.
“You thanked your mother for me…right?” I asked as he walked the gelding along side Celeste and I.
“Of course, I would fear for my life otherwise,” Aiden said simply with a shrug of his shoulders.
“A legitimate fear,” I replied with a small smirk.
After that, the ride went on in an uninterrupted silence for a total of five minutes. During those five minutes, something settled in my stomach and stayed there, unnerving me and reminding me of what I would have to do. There was no going around it, it had to be done. However, the moment I heard Aiden’s voice, I found myself forgetting about what must be done, and I could only think about what I wanted to do.
_____________________________________
Night hadn’t even fallen and Aiden forced me to stop and set up camp, because I apparently “needed rest”. That crazy old bat probably just wanted to make sure I was miserable and she must have known that Aiden would listen to her advice. We weren’t getting anything done by putting up camp early…Not that I fought the issue too hard. We wouldn’t arrive at Castle Reloir until tomorrow, that just gave me a small bit more time, but it was time that I would absorb and immerse myself in.
“It’s not even dark yet!” I complained as I dropped the tent next to where Aiden was kneeling.
“Healer’s orders,” Aiden replied with a shrug of his shoulders, and pulled the tent in front of him to set it up.
I rolled my eyes. “Whatever, I’ll go unsaddle Celeste…” I muttered darkly and trudged over to my horse. Just knowing that I was indirectly taking orders from that bitter old medicinal woman put me in a foul mood.
As I approached the mare, I kept an eye on the gelding, wishing he had a name, and if he didn’t I would gladly provide one for him. “Satan” seemed like it would fit best, but I didn’t bring up the issue with Aiden.
I yawned absently and lifted the saddle off of her back and hung it on a low tree branch, setting the blanket a short distance apart from the saddle. Next, I found a horse brush and slowly went over Celeste’s coat, letting her wander and eat grass as I did so. Once I was finished brushing her, I took a lead rope and tied it to a tree near camp.
“You can let her wander, she’ll come back in the morning,” Aiden assured me and I gave him a skeptical look, he smiled at me reassuringly and said, “Trust me Angel, she’ll be here when you wake up.”
I rolled my eyes at him and took the lead rope off of her. Instantly Celeste wandered over to where the black gelding was already meandering out of camp. I watched them disbelievingly for a long moment and then shook my head and walked over to where Aiden had started a fire.
“They’ll come back,” Aiden assured me with a chuckle.
“Right,” I replied doubtfully.
_________________________________
Later that night, while Aiden was asleep, I rolled around in my blankets nonstop, although I did so quietly, so as to not awaken Aiden. I was restless and thinking far too much to be trying to sleep.
After what felt like hours of not being able to sleep, I finally sat up and sighed slowly and quietly. I cast a short glance in Aiden’s direction, where his blankets were bobbing steadily up and down in accordance with his breathing.
Tomorrow was it. The last time I would see him, and here he was wasting time with such trivial things as sleeping. Of course, he didn’t know what my plan was, and I intended to keep it that way. I watched him for a long moment and carefully pushed the blankets off of me so that I could crawl on my hands and knees to where he was sleeping.
I hesitated when I saw his face, and sat back on my heels. His face was smooth and relaxed in the moonlight, and he was as handsome as he had ever been. His golden hair tumbled into his face and obscured his eyes for the most part, and for the briefest of moments, I wanted to brush his hair back, just so I could see his eyes. But the thought died in my mind and I never acted, I just stared at him for a long time, with my knees pulled up to my chest and my chin resting upon them.
Aiden shuffled beneath his blankets and I held my breath, wondering if I could move fast enough to my own blankets before he woke up. Knowing that I didn’t have that time, I pursed my lips and waited as the longs seconds seemed to stretch by. Aiden opened his eyes slowly and shook his hair to the side, looking at me with something like curiosity in his eyes.
“Angel?” he asked tiredly, although he didn’t sit up.
I didn’t reply and looked away, more than a little embarrassed.
“Is there something wrong?” he asked, now sounding concerned and propping himself up on one elbow, trying to wake himself up more.
“No, just a bad dream,” I lied smoothly and sighed, angry with myself for worrying him in such a stupid way.
I blinked rapidly as his cold fingertips brushed against the spot just below my left eye, “What sort of bad dream?” he asked absently. Considering how my face was a steady shade of red where he had touched me, it was a soothing feeling and I wanted to embrace that feeling. But I couldn’t, and I knew that I couldn’t. I pulled back, my face becoming even redder than before.
“It’s nothing,” I assured him and scooted back slightly, closer to my own pile of blankets.
“Nothing? You don’t usually come on my side of the tent over ‘nothing’,” Aiden pointed out and I could tell that he was smirking at me, even in the darkness.
“Sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you up,” I said, changing the topic as I tried to move back toward my own bed.
Aiden grabbed my hand before I got far. “No, wait,” he said softly, looking directly into my eyes when he spoke, “I want to hear about it, please.”
I hesitated, instantly racking my brain for a nightmare that I could tell him about, a convincing one, preferably. “It’s stupid…” I muttered almost inaudibly.
Aiden laughed softly and pushed himself into a sitting position, looking completely coherent. “I’m sure it’s not, tell me,” he urged carefully.
“I…um…” I mumbled, trying to pull a nightmare from somewhere in my head, then, abruptly, I provided, “I had to leave…and…” my face burned an obvious red shade as I continued, “I couldn’t ever see you again. I grew old and all that, but you were always…there, in my head, I always remembered you but never saw you again,” I babbled and exhaled when I realized how little sense that made from his point of view and how similar that was to how I expected the rest of my life to go.
There was a short silence, and I looked at Aiden to see him looking stern, at first and then a smirk curled onto his lips. “That’s ridiculous Angel, I’m not going anywhere,” he assured me comfortably.
I could feel some hysterical laughter bubbling up in my chest, but I suppressed it and only laughed a little, so as to not cause discomfort. “I told you it was stupid. It was stupid to watch you too, but I felt like you might…” I bit my lower lip and shook my head, “Never mind, it was just stupid…” I looked away from Aiden, wishing beyond all things pure that he would sleep with a shirt on so that I wouldn’t be subjected to the flawlessness of his chest. It was the only thing I could focus on otherwise.
“Needing reassurance isn’t stupid Angel,” Aiden said quietly, drawing my eyes to him despite my attempts to keep staring at the ground. He looked me directly in the eyes and said, “You don’t always have to be so independent, you may have lost your family, but I’m here for you now. You don’t have to keep being alone.”
My lips twitched in a tremble and I closed my eyes, leaning back and laying my head down in the grass that made up the floor of the tent. “Thank you,” I murmured with a content sigh, even when on the inside I was burning up while I was freezing at the same time. To know that I had met such an amazing person and I had to give him up was torture. It wasn’t fair.
I wasn’t sure what happened after that, because I had fallen asleep where I had laid back, knowing that I was vaguely close to Aiden was comfort enough to lull me into a deep, uninterrupted slumber.
___________________________________
We left early in the morning, packing up the tent even before the sun was done climbing into the sky. Not that I helped much with packing up, since I was ordered to “refrain from strenuous activity” by the cranky old medicinal woman. I was allowed, however to saddle Celeste. Who was back at camp by the time I had woken up, just as Aiden had said. He didn’t say anything, but he had a smug look on his face all morning.
I had a short episode with the large black gelding--who I figured out was named “Goliath”--in which he tried to stomp on my foot while I was saddling Celeste. In which case I called him a “smelly brute” and took Celeste somewhere farther away to finish my task.
Once camp was packed up and the horses were saddled, Aiden and I mounted up and began our march to Castle Reloir. Which I was secretly dreading despite my cool exterior, in which I continued to insult Goliath from the saddle, even though he couldn’t understand me, I felt better.
After what seemed like only a short while, but in reality was nearly five hours, the trees began to thin out and the wall surrounding the castle town at the base of Castle Reloir came into view.
This was it, I could feel it coming and my heart was throbbing insufferably in my chest. The castle gates were in view through the trees and Aiden was walking leisurely at my side, eyeing the gates with a ghost of a smirk on his lips.
“Look Angel! We made it!” he exclaimed in a voice barely above his usual tone.
“Yeah, I guess we did.” I smiled back at him, convincingly, licking my lips nervously when he looked away. Here it goes.
“Hey, Aiden…” I trailed off as he looked at me over his shoulder, stopping in mid-step, “I think we should split up here. You know, not for long, but I don’t think we should go in together.”
Aiden blinked fiercely, processing my words, “Why not?” he sounded a little offended, as if I was ashamed to be seen with him.
That wasn’t the case at all, obviously, I would have loved to be seen with him, but, life was cruel and unusual. “Because,” I said matter-of-factly, lightening the mood, “you’re getting married soon, if you were to walk into town with another girl, how would that look to your fiancée?” The word felt foreign on my tongue and I felt as if I needed to rinse my mouth out with acid to get the word’s slime from my mouth.
“Oh,” Aiden frowned, clearly understanding my point, “I guess that’s a good idea, but I still don’t like it much…”
I snorted, flapping my wrist in his direction in dismissal. “Don’t worry about it, you go in today and I’ll follow you in a day or two. I can’t be gone for long anyway, aren’t I supposed to be your ‘best maid’?” I chuckled a little, while my heart seemed to be making small crackling sounds in my chest.
Aiden smirked at the mention of my position in his wedding and nodded. “Right, I’m being overprotective aren’t I? That’s a great plan, in two days I’ll introduce you to Nailah and show you the castle and you can help me write my vows, you’ll give a speech won’t you?” He raised his eyebrows questioningly.
“Of course,” my voice almost caught over the second word, but I seemed perfectly normal.
I clutched a crumpled piece of paper tightly in my hand and swallowed hard as Aiden stepped toward me. However, this time I met him half way and threw my arms around him, surprising him for fraction of a second, but he seemed to be pleased by my new acceptance of hugs and retuned the gesture with twice the pressure. He didn’t know what I did, this would be the last time that I would see him and I was finding it difficult to let go.
I had done exactly what he had said I would. I had fallen for him.
I soon realized that I would have to let go before he became suspicious of my prolonged embrace and slid my hand into his travel bag, dropping the crumpled piece of paper into it before retracting my hand again. Then, I relaxed my arms and let the slide away from him, stopping dully at my sides.
Aiden held on a little longer, just for good measure and looked down at me as he stepped away. “I’ll see you in a few days, right?”
I nodded, not willing to say anything else as I watched him walk away, his back disappeared behind trees before I finally forced myself to move. I turned back the way we had came and began to walk, my heart now lurching with odd surges of pain.
__________________________________________
Aiden’s Point Of View
Three days. It had been exactly three days since Angel and I had split up. And she still hadn’t shown up, I asked around town a little, but no one had seen her. It was…frustrating, to say the least. I was also worried, but I suppose there was really no reason to be worried, since she could easily take care of herself, as she proved several times during our travels. Such as when we encountered the orcs, the bandits--both times--as well as when I had first met her. She knew how to fight and she had an interesting style.
But still, three days, I remembered perfectly, she had said two days. You hear that? Two, not three but two. What was taking her so long? Was she having trouble getting into the town?
The king had been less than pleased to see that I had made it back to the castle, but he wasn’t willing to kill me in front of his daughter. Therefore, he did the most royal thing of all: he welcomed me like an old friend. I could tell that he cared for his daughter greatly, but so did I, why else would I have spent so much effort just to get back to her?
I bit my lower lip as I eyed the landscape beneath me, the sun was just disappearing over the horizon.
“Aiden?” a soft voice said from behind me and I turned casually, knowing who it was the instant she had spoken.
I smiled warmly as Nailah stood uncertainly in the doorframe that led onto the balcony. She was so frail looking that I sometimes thought she would shatter if I talked too loudly. Her skin was pallid and her hair was a fair blonde and her eyes were a soft blue. She was the epitome of innocence, my opposite.
I held my hand out toward her and said, “Come, enjoy the sunset with me.”
Nailah took my hand and I pulled her softly to my side, wrapping my arm around her waist. As she leaned her head against my shoulder and sighed, I thought, wondering where I had heard myself say something similar to that. It only took a moment for me to remember and I smiled to myself, watching the sun fall downward in the sky.
I don’t know how I could have forgotten, any memory with Angel in it was worth remembering.
_______________________________________
Two days before the storm
“Angel!” I cried dramatically and turned to see her jump. She had been sitting in the snow, tracing her finger through the powder in front of her as she complained about the cold.
“What?” she asked sharply, sounding annoyed, probably because I had made her jump. I pretended not to notice.
“Look at this sunset!” I exclaimed waving my hand over my shoulder as I couldn’t seem to look away from her. “Don’t you want to come enjoy it with me?” I raised a suggestive eyebrow and she rolled her eyes.
Her lips tightened as she repressed a smile, although I could never figure out why. It surprised me when she actually got up and stood next to me, just within reach, if I wanted to, I could easily reach out and touch her cheek. Her jaw tightened as she struggled to refrain from shivering. I hesitated a moment, watching her face carefully as light glanced off of her cheeks and shadows appeared around the side of her nose and a the corner of her mouth.
A shiver escaped her and I put my arm around her shoulders without much thought. I was attempting to turn my eyes toward the sunset, rather than at Angel and the way her skin seemed to glow--
_____________________________________
I shook the thought away as the sun finally dipped behind the mountains and Nailah shifted against my side. I cursed myself lightly at the memory, I was with Nailah, I couldn’t think of Angel, even if only as a friend, it seemed…wrong. For some odd reason.
Wanting to distract myself, I suddenly remembered the gift I had gotten Nailah. I slid my arm away from her and she took her head off my shoulder. “Wait here, I have a present for you,” I said, hurrying back into my room--where I half-expected assassins to appear out of nowhere and try to kill me.
Not that they would succeed.
I found my travel bag after a quick search through the room and opened it. I had to dig through my items for a moment before finding the small box containing the gift. A frown creased my brow as I found something unfamiliar, something that didn’t feel right in my hands. Was it mine? I pulled out a crumpled piece of old paper and blinked as I decided what to do with it, then I remembered my mission and stuffed it into my pocket, intent on examining it later. In the place where the paper had been was the small box I was looking for and I quickly scooped it up and discarded my bag on my bed.
Nailah was fiddling with her hair as she stared out over the castle grounds when I came to her side and offered her the box. Her blue eyes gleamed as she saw the box and she opened it carefully, adoring the suspense, even though she must have known it was jewelry. She gasped as she saw the necklace and I grinned.
“Aiden! It’s beautiful!” She plucked the necklace from its case and fumbled with the clasp.
“Here.” I took the necklace from her hands and easily fit the clasp together, then took a step back to admire the necklace against her pale skin. It was beautiful, the teardrop shaped amethyst glimmered in the fading light and the silver chain was as delicate as Nailah herself. It truly was the perfect gift.
“I love it Aiden, thank you.” She smiled contently and kissed me quickly on the lips.
“I’m glad you like it,” I replied, my mind drifting insufferably back to the piece of paper in my pocket, I couldn’t seem to focus on anything else. Maybe it was a reminder to myself. If it was I had to hope it wasn’t anything too important.
Nailah seemed distracted as well and I took the chance to make an excuse, “I have to go into town for business, if you want to wait for me here that’s fine, but I’ll be gone awhile,” I informed her.
Nailah smiled wistfully and nodded quickly. “No, I have to speak to my father anyway,” she kissed me again and turned to leave but paused at the door and turned to look at me over her shoulder. “I’ll see you later tonight, perhaps?” I grinned as her face turned a slight shade of pink at her own suggestion and then she disappeared.
I waited a minute to make sure she was completely gone before I went to the bedside and lit a candle and fished the piece of paper out of my pocket. I smoothed it out as best as I could and frowned when I saw that the handwriting wasn’t my own; it was too messy, written in a hurry, it seemed. I read promptly through the lengthy letter:
Aiden,
If you’re reading this, then I’m already gone. I know you don’t look in this bag often, so I’m probably already two or three days ahead of you. I’m sorry I lied and I’m sorry I couldn’t stay to be your “best maid”.
…I might as well get the truth out now.
I’ve gone back to Castle Burdock, it’s the only place I know where to start again, and the only place I can think of that you can’t follow me. I won’t be executed for treason with General Darren on my side, so don’t worry about me. Don’t follow me. There’s nothing you can say that will change my mind.I never meant to--When I--You’ve done so much and I
I’ve never been good at this sort of thing but…I’ll try to explain. I left because I want you to be happy, and I wanted to leave knowing that you were happy. As your official best friend, I wish you all the happiness you can hold in that conceded body of yours…Okay, I mean that in a good way…But I warned you that I wasn’t good at this so…Hell, I’ll just write it. I love you. I always have.Maybe that’s why this hurts so much. But I know you’ll live fine without me, you’ll find another best man, one that is actually a man, hopefully. Someone who will actually be able to be happy for you and enjoy your wedding.without wanting to throttle your bride to be.
Even though I complained a lot, I wanted you to know that I actually liked traveling with you and I’ll never forget you. It was surprisingly entertaining. And I hope that you can forgive me for all the times I yelled at you or lied to you or tried to capture you. Most of all, I hope you can forgive me for leaving you nothing but this letter as a goodbye. I can only hope beyond everything that is real and wonderful in this world that you won’t despise me fro what I’ve done.
I’ve only one request: Be happy. Even if I can’t be part of that happiness, I want so badly for you to be happy. So, please, even if you can’t forgive me. Forget me.
Please. Be happy.
Your (best) friend,
Angeline Elisa Terris
I glanced over the letter twice more before I finally lowered it away from my eyes, frowning to myself. Was this really from Angel? It sounded like her, and the handwriting was incredibly similar to hers, but I had hardly had many chances to see her handwriting, so I could have been mistaken.
She wasn’t gone. She couldn’t be gone, this was a joke, if I just looked at the bottom I knew I would find a note that said “haha just kidding!” and she would jump out of the shadows and everything would be fine.
I licked my lips and glanced at the letter a third time, maybe the words were different, maybe they had changed while I wasn’t looking.
I crumpled the old paper into a tight ball and stuffed it back into my pocket. The words were the same, they hadn’t changed at all.
Don’t follow me. How easily I could smudge out that first word. But why didn’t she want me to follow her? Was she mad at me? What had I done wrong? She seemed fine when I had seen her last.
She was traveling by herself, which meant I could probably catch up with her pretty quickly, considering she most likely wasn’t sleeping well at night--how could someone that self-reliant have such an overwhelming fear? I could bring her back.
But she didn’t want me to bring her back, she left because she wanted me to be happy? What kind of excuse was that? It made no sense, she made me happy, just the way she reacted to everything, how she acted tough just because she wanted to be recognized as a warrior. Everything. Just seeing her made me want to smile. And she thought leaving would make me happy?
I pulled the letter out again and reread it, but this time something surged through me, excitement and pain at the same time. Every other time I had read the letter, I had skimmed and I had missed something, some extremely important words: I love you. I always have. I lowered the letter again, and ran my hand over my face. How had I missed something like that?
“Stupid…” I muttered to myself, barely holding onto the letter now.
She loved me. That was never something I had expected her to admit. It was never something I had expected to happen. If she loved me, then why didn’t she just say it? Then she wouldn’t have had to leave, I would have known and I could have stopped her…
What about Nailah? A voice in the back of my head seemed to ask, breaking into my rapid thinking. What about her? I frowned to myself, considering the ring that was on her left ring finger. She wasn’t the issue at the moment, Angel was. Or were they both part of the issue? I loved Nailah, I knew that, she was beautiful and loving and I could hardly take my eyes off of her.
But if I loved Nailah, then why couldn’t I stop thinking about Angel? She had been creeping into my thoughts for the past three days, I couldn’t wait until I got the chance to introduce her to Nailah, show her around the castle, talk to her…
I growled in frustration and crumpled the piece of paper into a ball again, stuffing it into my pocket as I began to pace the room, my thoughts racing.
Please. Be happy.
How could she expect me to be happy when she had left me so confused?
“Why so sour Angel?” I heard Aiden ask and turned my glare on him. He smirked.
“Well, I woke up to some old woman groping me--Ow!” I glared at the woman a second time and she smiled evilly to herself, pretending as if she hadn’t just pinched my leg to the point where it would probably bruise.
Aiden made a tsking sound and shook his head before saying, “You shouldn’t talk like that about such nice people Angel, especially when they’re helping you. It’s not very charming.”
I rolled my eyes and ignored him.
Another few minutes passed and the woman finally left me alone. “She’s fine to travel,” she informed Aiden, as if I weren’t even there. I was almost certain that she was doing that to irritate me.
“Thank you very much for your patience,” Aiden said politely, smiling charmingly at the woman.
She nodded gruffly and looked at me with a lasting scowl. “No strenuous activity though, just in case,” she looked at Aiden again, “Go to sleep early and make sure she gets plenty of rest.”
“I’ll make sure of that, thank you.”
Then she turned and left, closing the door lightly behind her.
“So, Angel? What do you say?” Aiden asked with raised brows, “Should we leave immediately or do you want to do something before we leave?”
“We should probably leave in a little while, I mean, you probably want to say goodbye to your parents, right?” I asked, pushing my legs over the side of the bed and sitting up.
Aiden shrugged. “They’re gone for the moment, they had business in a nearby town and left early this morning. So, we can leave whenever you’re ready,” he told me with a pleasant smile and unreadable eyes.
I walked over to the trunk at the end of my bed and began to stuff all of my things into a travel pack--making sure to lay my father’s chain mail on top. “Are you already packed?” I asked Aiden as I closed my bag.
“Indeed, I’ve been packed for a few days actually.” He looked at the skeptical look on my face and smiled, grabbed my chin with his fingers and flashed a dazzling smile at me. “Not that I was planning on leaving without you, my lovely companion. But you never know when you have to leave in a hurry.”
“Right,” I said, rolling my eyes and pulling my chin free of his fingertips. “So let’s get out of here shall we?” I walked toward the door and didn’t even hear Aiden as he followed me out into the hall.
“Just a moment Angel,” Aiden said, grabbing my shoulder from behind and keeping me from moving any further. I stumbled slightly and stopped with a scowl of annoyance and Aiden pushed past me, entered a room and came out with his usual travel bag and an extra burlap sack. “Ready,” he announced cheerily and led me down the hall to where I assumed the front door would be.
Once we had exited the house, I started toward the guarded gate, but Aiden caught my shoulder yet again. “Ah, ah, not yet, my mother left us gifts,” he said cheerily and I eyed him suspiciously. What sort of gift would she leave for us outside of the house? Hopefully it wouldn’t be too extreme…However, knowing Mrs. Stone as I did, she probably lived and breathed “extreme”, much like Aiden, of course.
I didn’t ask though, I just followed him to the left side of the house and grimaced as the stables came into view, “Aiden,” I warned as he proceeded toward it, “you can’t be serious,” I couldn’t keep the smile from my lips even though I didn’t exactly want a gift that was so expensive.
He turned and looked at me over his shoulder, his eyes wide with feigned innocence. “What ever could you be talking about, Angel?” he asked, a smirk playing on the edge of his lips.
Following at a slightly quicker pace than before, I marched into the stables and stopped short when I realized that Aiden had continued around the side where two beautiful horses were standing saddled and pawing exasperatedly at the ground. One was a huge black gelding and the other was a buckskin mare with a white mane and tail.
Awestruck, I wandered over to the mare and held my hand out, completely ignoring Aiden as he spoke to me. Who cared what he had to say when there was an amazing horse standing right in front of me?
However, my ignoring didn’t seem to go so well, since I happened to have my little petting excursion thwarted by the large gelding, who so violently snapped at my hand. I instantly pulled back and staggered backwards until I bumped into Aiden.
Who reacted by laughing at me, rather being the gentleman who pulled me behind him and said, “Get back you fiend!” Nope, he laughed at me, and the gelding seemed just as amused at my reaction, bobbing its head up and down and pawing at the ground. It could have been an angry gesture too. I wasn’t sure.
“What the hell?” I demanded, elbowing Aiden in the stomach to cease his laughter.
“I’m sorry Angel, but, I tried to warn you. He’s a bit protective of that mare,” Aiden explained with a lasting smile on his lips.
I eyed the gelding again and he simply nibbled at the grass near his feet, looking the part of an “innocent” animal. I walked a wide circle around the gelding and he watched me from the corner of his eye, however he didn’t make any threatening movements toward me this time. That might have had something to do with Aiden’s presence beside him though.
Content with the gelding’s sudden change of personality, I approached the mare and held my hand out absently. A smile curled onto my face when her lips brushed over my hand, obviously looking for food of some sort. When she realized I had nothing, she went back to nibbling at the grass around her.
“She’s beautiful…” I muttered and stroked her neck awestruck.
“You like her?” Aiden asked, coming up beside me without making a sound.
“Of course,” I stated, sounding a little cross, although I hadn’t meant to.
“Good…You know, she doesn’t even have a name yet…” Aiden hinted and I looked up sharply, obviously surprised.
“I get to name her too?” I asked incredulously and Aiden nodded, clearly thrilled at my reaction. I pulled back the excitement a little bit and squared my shoulders as I thought of a name. After a minute or so of silence, I produced, “Celeste.”
“Celeste?”
“Yes, Celeste, that’s her name,” I decided, now that I had spoken it aloud, it seemed like the name would stick.
“That’s an excellent name,” Aiden praised, sounding genuine, which pulled a smile onto my face of which I couldn’t seem to stop.
I cleared my throat and wiped the goofy smile from my lips, gave the black gelding one last glare and mounted Celeste with ease. “Shall we go?” I asked, pride swelling in me despite myself.
Aiden smiled at me from the ground and nodded. “Of course.” Not a moment later, he mounted his significantly larger horse with ten times the grace I had attempted to flaunt. He threw his trademark smirk in my direction and I ignored him, urging my mare forward as if I hadn’t been watching him, hoping that he might tumble over the saddle and land on the ground.
“You thanked your mother for me…right?” I asked as he walked the gelding along side Celeste and I.
“Of course, I would fear for my life otherwise,” Aiden said simply with a shrug of his shoulders.
“A legitimate fear,” I replied with a small smirk.
After that, the ride went on in an uninterrupted silence for a total of five minutes. During those five minutes, something settled in my stomach and stayed there, unnerving me and reminding me of what I would have to do. There was no going around it, it had to be done. However, the moment I heard Aiden’s voice, I found myself forgetting about what must be done, and I could only think about what I wanted to do.
_____________________________________
Night hadn’t even fallen and Aiden forced me to stop and set up camp, because I apparently “needed rest”. That crazy old bat probably just wanted to make sure I was miserable and she must have known that Aiden would listen to her advice. We weren’t getting anything done by putting up camp early…Not that I fought the issue too hard. We wouldn’t arrive at Castle Reloir until tomorrow, that just gave me a small bit more time, but it was time that I would absorb and immerse myself in.
“It’s not even dark yet!” I complained as I dropped the tent next to where Aiden was kneeling.
“Healer’s orders,” Aiden replied with a shrug of his shoulders, and pulled the tent in front of him to set it up.
I rolled my eyes. “Whatever, I’ll go unsaddle Celeste…” I muttered darkly and trudged over to my horse. Just knowing that I was indirectly taking orders from that bitter old medicinal woman put me in a foul mood.
As I approached the mare, I kept an eye on the gelding, wishing he had a name, and if he didn’t I would gladly provide one for him. “Satan” seemed like it would fit best, but I didn’t bring up the issue with Aiden.
I yawned absently and lifted the saddle off of her back and hung it on a low tree branch, setting the blanket a short distance apart from the saddle. Next, I found a horse brush and slowly went over Celeste’s coat, letting her wander and eat grass as I did so. Once I was finished brushing her, I took a lead rope and tied it to a tree near camp.
“You can let her wander, she’ll come back in the morning,” Aiden assured me and I gave him a skeptical look, he smiled at me reassuringly and said, “Trust me Angel, she’ll be here when you wake up.”
I rolled my eyes at him and took the lead rope off of her. Instantly Celeste wandered over to where the black gelding was already meandering out of camp. I watched them disbelievingly for a long moment and then shook my head and walked over to where Aiden had started a fire.
“They’ll come back,” Aiden assured me with a chuckle.
“Right,” I replied doubtfully.
_________________________________
Later that night, while Aiden was asleep, I rolled around in my blankets nonstop, although I did so quietly, so as to not awaken Aiden. I was restless and thinking far too much to be trying to sleep.
After what felt like hours of not being able to sleep, I finally sat up and sighed slowly and quietly. I cast a short glance in Aiden’s direction, where his blankets were bobbing steadily up and down in accordance with his breathing.
Tomorrow was it. The last time I would see him, and here he was wasting time with such trivial things as sleeping. Of course, he didn’t know what my plan was, and I intended to keep it that way. I watched him for a long moment and carefully pushed the blankets off of me so that I could crawl on my hands and knees to where he was sleeping.
I hesitated when I saw his face, and sat back on my heels. His face was smooth and relaxed in the moonlight, and he was as handsome as he had ever been. His golden hair tumbled into his face and obscured his eyes for the most part, and for the briefest of moments, I wanted to brush his hair back, just so I could see his eyes. But the thought died in my mind and I never acted, I just stared at him for a long time, with my knees pulled up to my chest and my chin resting upon them.
Aiden shuffled beneath his blankets and I held my breath, wondering if I could move fast enough to my own blankets before he woke up. Knowing that I didn’t have that time, I pursed my lips and waited as the longs seconds seemed to stretch by. Aiden opened his eyes slowly and shook his hair to the side, looking at me with something like curiosity in his eyes.
“Angel?” he asked tiredly, although he didn’t sit up.
I didn’t reply and looked away, more than a little embarrassed.
“Is there something wrong?” he asked, now sounding concerned and propping himself up on one elbow, trying to wake himself up more.
“No, just a bad dream,” I lied smoothly and sighed, angry with myself for worrying him in such a stupid way.
I blinked rapidly as his cold fingertips brushed against the spot just below my left eye, “What sort of bad dream?” he asked absently. Considering how my face was a steady shade of red where he had touched me, it was a soothing feeling and I wanted to embrace that feeling. But I couldn’t, and I knew that I couldn’t. I pulled back, my face becoming even redder than before.
“It’s nothing,” I assured him and scooted back slightly, closer to my own pile of blankets.
“Nothing? You don’t usually come on my side of the tent over ‘nothing’,” Aiden pointed out and I could tell that he was smirking at me, even in the darkness.
“Sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you up,” I said, changing the topic as I tried to move back toward my own bed.
Aiden grabbed my hand before I got far. “No, wait,” he said softly, looking directly into my eyes when he spoke, “I want to hear about it, please.”
I hesitated, instantly racking my brain for a nightmare that I could tell him about, a convincing one, preferably. “It’s stupid…” I muttered almost inaudibly.
Aiden laughed softly and pushed himself into a sitting position, looking completely coherent. “I’m sure it’s not, tell me,” he urged carefully.
“I…um…” I mumbled, trying to pull a nightmare from somewhere in my head, then, abruptly, I provided, “I had to leave…and…” my face burned an obvious red shade as I continued, “I couldn’t ever see you again. I grew old and all that, but you were always…there, in my head, I always remembered you but never saw you again,” I babbled and exhaled when I realized how little sense that made from his point of view and how similar that was to how I expected the rest of my life to go.
There was a short silence, and I looked at Aiden to see him looking stern, at first and then a smirk curled onto his lips. “That’s ridiculous Angel, I’m not going anywhere,” he assured me comfortably.
I could feel some hysterical laughter bubbling up in my chest, but I suppressed it and only laughed a little, so as to not cause discomfort. “I told you it was stupid. It was stupid to watch you too, but I felt like you might…” I bit my lower lip and shook my head, “Never mind, it was just stupid…” I looked away from Aiden, wishing beyond all things pure that he would sleep with a shirt on so that I wouldn’t be subjected to the flawlessness of his chest. It was the only thing I could focus on otherwise.
“Needing reassurance isn’t stupid Angel,” Aiden said quietly, drawing my eyes to him despite my attempts to keep staring at the ground. He looked me directly in the eyes and said, “You don’t always have to be so independent, you may have lost your family, but I’m here for you now. You don’t have to keep being alone.”
My lips twitched in a tremble and I closed my eyes, leaning back and laying my head down in the grass that made up the floor of the tent. “Thank you,” I murmured with a content sigh, even when on the inside I was burning up while I was freezing at the same time. To know that I had met such an amazing person and I had to give him up was torture. It wasn’t fair.
I wasn’t sure what happened after that, because I had fallen asleep where I had laid back, knowing that I was vaguely close to Aiden was comfort enough to lull me into a deep, uninterrupted slumber.
___________________________________
We left early in the morning, packing up the tent even before the sun was done climbing into the sky. Not that I helped much with packing up, since I was ordered to “refrain from strenuous activity” by the cranky old medicinal woman. I was allowed, however to saddle Celeste. Who was back at camp by the time I had woken up, just as Aiden had said. He didn’t say anything, but he had a smug look on his face all morning.
I had a short episode with the large black gelding--who I figured out was named “Goliath”--in which he tried to stomp on my foot while I was saddling Celeste. In which case I called him a “smelly brute” and took Celeste somewhere farther away to finish my task.
Once camp was packed up and the horses were saddled, Aiden and I mounted up and began our march to Castle Reloir. Which I was secretly dreading despite my cool exterior, in which I continued to insult Goliath from the saddle, even though he couldn’t understand me, I felt better.
After what seemed like only a short while, but in reality was nearly five hours, the trees began to thin out and the wall surrounding the castle town at the base of Castle Reloir came into view.
This was it, I could feel it coming and my heart was throbbing insufferably in my chest. The castle gates were in view through the trees and Aiden was walking leisurely at my side, eyeing the gates with a ghost of a smirk on his lips.
“Look Angel! We made it!” he exclaimed in a voice barely above his usual tone.
“Yeah, I guess we did.” I smiled back at him, convincingly, licking my lips nervously when he looked away. Here it goes.
“Hey, Aiden…” I trailed off as he looked at me over his shoulder, stopping in mid-step, “I think we should split up here. You know, not for long, but I don’t think we should go in together.”
Aiden blinked fiercely, processing my words, “Why not?” he sounded a little offended, as if I was ashamed to be seen with him.
That wasn’t the case at all, obviously, I would have loved to be seen with him, but, life was cruel and unusual. “Because,” I said matter-of-factly, lightening the mood, “you’re getting married soon, if you were to walk into town with another girl, how would that look to your fiancée?” The word felt foreign on my tongue and I felt as if I needed to rinse my mouth out with acid to get the word’s slime from my mouth.
“Oh,” Aiden frowned, clearly understanding my point, “I guess that’s a good idea, but I still don’t like it much…”
I snorted, flapping my wrist in his direction in dismissal. “Don’t worry about it, you go in today and I’ll follow you in a day or two. I can’t be gone for long anyway, aren’t I supposed to be your ‘best maid’?” I chuckled a little, while my heart seemed to be making small crackling sounds in my chest.
Aiden smirked at the mention of my position in his wedding and nodded. “Right, I’m being overprotective aren’t I? That’s a great plan, in two days I’ll introduce you to Nailah and show you the castle and you can help me write my vows, you’ll give a speech won’t you?” He raised his eyebrows questioningly.
“Of course,” my voice almost caught over the second word, but I seemed perfectly normal.
I clutched a crumpled piece of paper tightly in my hand and swallowed hard as Aiden stepped toward me. However, this time I met him half way and threw my arms around him, surprising him for fraction of a second, but he seemed to be pleased by my new acceptance of hugs and retuned the gesture with twice the pressure. He didn’t know what I did, this would be the last time that I would see him and I was finding it difficult to let go.
I had done exactly what he had said I would. I had fallen for him.
I soon realized that I would have to let go before he became suspicious of my prolonged embrace and slid my hand into his travel bag, dropping the crumpled piece of paper into it before retracting my hand again. Then, I relaxed my arms and let the slide away from him, stopping dully at my sides.
Aiden held on a little longer, just for good measure and looked down at me as he stepped away. “I’ll see you in a few days, right?”
I nodded, not willing to say anything else as I watched him walk away, his back disappeared behind trees before I finally forced myself to move. I turned back the way we had came and began to walk, my heart now lurching with odd surges of pain.
__________________________________________
Aiden’s Point Of View
Three days. It had been exactly three days since Angel and I had split up. And she still hadn’t shown up, I asked around town a little, but no one had seen her. It was…frustrating, to say the least. I was also worried, but I suppose there was really no reason to be worried, since she could easily take care of herself, as she proved several times during our travels. Such as when we encountered the orcs, the bandits--both times--as well as when I had first met her. She knew how to fight and she had an interesting style.
But still, three days, I remembered perfectly, she had said two days. You hear that? Two, not three but two. What was taking her so long? Was she having trouble getting into the town?
The king had been less than pleased to see that I had made it back to the castle, but he wasn’t willing to kill me in front of his daughter. Therefore, he did the most royal thing of all: he welcomed me like an old friend. I could tell that he cared for his daughter greatly, but so did I, why else would I have spent so much effort just to get back to her?
I bit my lower lip as I eyed the landscape beneath me, the sun was just disappearing over the horizon.
“Aiden?” a soft voice said from behind me and I turned casually, knowing who it was the instant she had spoken.
I smiled warmly as Nailah stood uncertainly in the doorframe that led onto the balcony. She was so frail looking that I sometimes thought she would shatter if I talked too loudly. Her skin was pallid and her hair was a fair blonde and her eyes were a soft blue. She was the epitome of innocence, my opposite.
I held my hand out toward her and said, “Come, enjoy the sunset with me.”
Nailah took my hand and I pulled her softly to my side, wrapping my arm around her waist. As she leaned her head against my shoulder and sighed, I thought, wondering where I had heard myself say something similar to that. It only took a moment for me to remember and I smiled to myself, watching the sun fall downward in the sky.
I don’t know how I could have forgotten, any memory with Angel in it was worth remembering.
_______________________________________
Two days before the storm
“Angel!” I cried dramatically and turned to see her jump. She had been sitting in the snow, tracing her finger through the powder in front of her as she complained about the cold.
“What?” she asked sharply, sounding annoyed, probably because I had made her jump. I pretended not to notice.
“Look at this sunset!” I exclaimed waving my hand over my shoulder as I couldn’t seem to look away from her. “Don’t you want to come enjoy it with me?” I raised a suggestive eyebrow and she rolled her eyes.
Her lips tightened as she repressed a smile, although I could never figure out why. It surprised me when she actually got up and stood next to me, just within reach, if I wanted to, I could easily reach out and touch her cheek. Her jaw tightened as she struggled to refrain from shivering. I hesitated a moment, watching her face carefully as light glanced off of her cheeks and shadows appeared around the side of her nose and a the corner of her mouth.
A shiver escaped her and I put my arm around her shoulders without much thought. I was attempting to turn my eyes toward the sunset, rather than at Angel and the way her skin seemed to glow--
_____________________________________
I shook the thought away as the sun finally dipped behind the mountains and Nailah shifted against my side. I cursed myself lightly at the memory, I was with Nailah, I couldn’t think of Angel, even if only as a friend, it seemed…wrong. For some odd reason.
Wanting to distract myself, I suddenly remembered the gift I had gotten Nailah. I slid my arm away from her and she took her head off my shoulder. “Wait here, I have a present for you,” I said, hurrying back into my room--where I half-expected assassins to appear out of nowhere and try to kill me.
Not that they would succeed.
I found my travel bag after a quick search through the room and opened it. I had to dig through my items for a moment before finding the small box containing the gift. A frown creased my brow as I found something unfamiliar, something that didn’t feel right in my hands. Was it mine? I pulled out a crumpled piece of old paper and blinked as I decided what to do with it, then I remembered my mission and stuffed it into my pocket, intent on examining it later. In the place where the paper had been was the small box I was looking for and I quickly scooped it up and discarded my bag on my bed.
Nailah was fiddling with her hair as she stared out over the castle grounds when I came to her side and offered her the box. Her blue eyes gleamed as she saw the box and she opened it carefully, adoring the suspense, even though she must have known it was jewelry. She gasped as she saw the necklace and I grinned.
“Aiden! It’s beautiful!” She plucked the necklace from its case and fumbled with the clasp.
“Here.” I took the necklace from her hands and easily fit the clasp together, then took a step back to admire the necklace against her pale skin. It was beautiful, the teardrop shaped amethyst glimmered in the fading light and the silver chain was as delicate as Nailah herself. It truly was the perfect gift.
“I love it Aiden, thank you.” She smiled contently and kissed me quickly on the lips.
“I’m glad you like it,” I replied, my mind drifting insufferably back to the piece of paper in my pocket, I couldn’t seem to focus on anything else. Maybe it was a reminder to myself. If it was I had to hope it wasn’t anything too important.
Nailah seemed distracted as well and I took the chance to make an excuse, “I have to go into town for business, if you want to wait for me here that’s fine, but I’ll be gone awhile,” I informed her.
Nailah smiled wistfully and nodded quickly. “No, I have to speak to my father anyway,” she kissed me again and turned to leave but paused at the door and turned to look at me over her shoulder. “I’ll see you later tonight, perhaps?” I grinned as her face turned a slight shade of pink at her own suggestion and then she disappeared.
I waited a minute to make sure she was completely gone before I went to the bedside and lit a candle and fished the piece of paper out of my pocket. I smoothed it out as best as I could and frowned when I saw that the handwriting wasn’t my own; it was too messy, written in a hurry, it seemed. I read promptly through the lengthy letter:
Aiden,
If you’re reading this, then I’m already gone. I know you don’t look in this bag often, so I’m probably already two or three days ahead of you. I’m sorry I lied and I’m sorry I couldn’t stay to be your “best maid”.
…I might as well get the truth out now.
I’ve gone back to Castle Burdock, it’s the only place I know where to start again, and the only place I can think of that you can’t follow me. I won’t be executed for treason with General Darren on my side, so don’t worry about me. Don’t follow me. There’s nothing you can say that will change my mind.I never meant to--When I--You’ve done so much and I
I’ve never been good at this sort of thing but…I’ll try to explain. I left because I want you to be happy, and I wanted to leave knowing that you were happy. As your official best friend, I wish you all the happiness you can hold in that conceded body of yours…Okay, I mean that in a good way…But I warned you that I wasn’t good at this so…Hell, I’ll just write it. I love you. I always have.Maybe that’s why this hurts so much. But I know you’ll live fine without me, you’ll find another best man, one that is actually a man, hopefully. Someone who will actually be able to be happy for you and enjoy your wedding.without wanting to throttle your bride to be.
Even though I complained a lot, I wanted you to know that I actually liked traveling with you and I’ll never forget you. It was surprisingly entertaining. And I hope that you can forgive me for all the times I yelled at you or lied to you or tried to capture you. Most of all, I hope you can forgive me for leaving you nothing but this letter as a goodbye. I can only hope beyond everything that is real and wonderful in this world that you won’t despise me fro what I’ve done.
I’ve only one request: Be happy. Even if I can’t be part of that happiness, I want so badly for you to be happy. So, please, even if you can’t forgive me. Forget me.
Please. Be happy.
Your (best) friend,
Angeline Elisa Terris
I glanced over the letter twice more before I finally lowered it away from my eyes, frowning to myself. Was this really from Angel? It sounded like her, and the handwriting was incredibly similar to hers, but I had hardly had many chances to see her handwriting, so I could have been mistaken.
She wasn’t gone. She couldn’t be gone, this was a joke, if I just looked at the bottom I knew I would find a note that said “haha just kidding!” and she would jump out of the shadows and everything would be fine.
I licked my lips and glanced at the letter a third time, maybe the words were different, maybe they had changed while I wasn’t looking.
I crumpled the old paper into a tight ball and stuffed it back into my pocket. The words were the same, they hadn’t changed at all.
Don’t follow me. How easily I could smudge out that first word. But why didn’t she want me to follow her? Was she mad at me? What had I done wrong? She seemed fine when I had seen her last.
She was traveling by herself, which meant I could probably catch up with her pretty quickly, considering she most likely wasn’t sleeping well at night--how could someone that self-reliant have such an overwhelming fear? I could bring her back.
But she didn’t want me to bring her back, she left because she wanted me to be happy? What kind of excuse was that? It made no sense, she made me happy, just the way she reacted to everything, how she acted tough just because she wanted to be recognized as a warrior. Everything. Just seeing her made me want to smile. And she thought leaving would make me happy?
I pulled the letter out again and reread it, but this time something surged through me, excitement and pain at the same time. Every other time I had read the letter, I had skimmed and I had missed something, some extremely important words: I love you. I always have. I lowered the letter again, and ran my hand over my face. How had I missed something like that?
“Stupid…” I muttered to myself, barely holding onto the letter now.
She loved me. That was never something I had expected her to admit. It was never something I had expected to happen. If she loved me, then why didn’t she just say it? Then she wouldn’t have had to leave, I would have known and I could have stopped her…
What about Nailah? A voice in the back of my head seemed to ask, breaking into my rapid thinking. What about her? I frowned to myself, considering the ring that was on her left ring finger. She wasn’t the issue at the moment, Angel was. Or were they both part of the issue? I loved Nailah, I knew that, she was beautiful and loving and I could hardly take my eyes off of her.
But if I loved Nailah, then why couldn’t I stop thinking about Angel? She had been creeping into my thoughts for the past three days, I couldn’t wait until I got the chance to introduce her to Nailah, show her around the castle, talk to her…
I growled in frustration and crumpled the piece of paper into a ball again, stuffing it into my pocket as I began to pace the room, my thoughts racing.
Please. Be happy.
How could she expect me to be happy when she had left me so confused?