My Desperate Endeavor To Find My Whoever.

"You know you left the boy with nothing
but the sunrise through the window pane"

I woke up with a dull headache and was slightly disoriented. I rubbed my eyes in an attempt to wake myself up. I was looking at the clock which read nine, when I remembered some of what happened last night.

I sat up with a jolt, and noticed that Alex was sleeping next to me, his arm had been under where my body was, pulling me into him. And I noted that we were both...naked.

Oh shit. What have I gotten myself into?

Crap, crap, crap, crap. What should I do?

Things would be far too awkward to try and explain later...

I made up my mind and got up as silently as possible. I gathered my clothes and pulled them on, which were all scattered from the night before.

I tip-toed out the door, and into the cool, morning breeze.

***

I figured the only thing that would help me decide what to do was take a walk. I was halfway past Forever The Sickest Kids' bus, when I heard a voice call my name.

"Andrea!" I turned to see Kyle, briskly walking to me.

I paused to let him catch up. That was when I realized that it was their bus the party was at last night.

"What are you doing?" He asked me.

"Just going for a walk..."

"May I join you?" He said, smiling.

"Uh, sure." I said grinning right back.

We walked in silence, as I found a rock that looked suitable to kick.

I swung my leg at it, and as we continued walking Kyle hit it, then me and so on.

Kyle decided to break the silence. "So....I saw you leave the bus with Alex last night..." He finished with a wink.

I blushed. "I...ah...well..."

He laughed at how flustered I was. "It's alright, you don't need to be embarrassed. So...are you two an item now?" He wiggled his eyebrows.

I laughed. "Uh. No."

"Well why not? I mean obviously you two are pretty much perfect."

"Right. Well. You see...about that..."

"Just spit it out." He said chuckling.

"Well-"

"You say well a lot in your sentences don't you?" Kyle smirked at me.

I gave him a look.

"Okay fine, go on." He said raising his hands in surrender.

"When I woke up this morning...I kind of just...left." I admitted sheepishly.

"You mean before he woke up?"

I nodded.

He looked at me confused. "Well why would you do that?"

"Because...we're meant to be just friends."

"Oh come off it. I can tell you practically love him."

"I do not!"

He gave me that look now.

"Okay fine. Maybe I do. But who's to say he won't get creeped out?"

"Uh, me? I can tell by the way he kissed you last night. it was not just the alcohol talking."

"I-wait you saw us?" I said raiseing an eyebrow.

"I may have, but that's not the point."

"Then what is?"

"That this is your opportunity to tell him. There will never be a more perfect time. I'm sure if I know people as well as I do, that there was real meaning to what happened between you two last night."

We were back to where we started, the front of his tour bus.

He really had a point.

"I think you may be right."

"Aren't I though?" He said jokingly.

"Yes. Now if you'll excuse me, I think I will go and take your advice."

He smiled. "Good."

***

I walked back to the bus, surprised to find nobody was on it.

I went to the back planning to watch a movie, when I noticed Alex was there already doing so.

I plopped down next to him, and he looked over at me. I could tell immediately that something was off.

"Alex, what's wrong?"

"Uh...Can you keep a secret?" He said looking at me shamefully.

"Of course. I won't tell a soul."

"Well, you know that big party everyone went to last night?"

I nodded.

"I..I got a little too drunk, and ended up fucking some girl. Problem is, well, I can't remember who she was. I got far too drunk..."

Crap. Come on Andrea, it's now or never.

"I-"

"What?" He looked at me hopefully. "Do you know who she was?"

You can do it. Just tell him.

"I...Uhh-no. I'm sorry."

His face fell a little. "Oh, that's alright. Just please don't tell anyone."

"I-I won't."

"Thanks, you're a great friend," He said leaning to hug me.

What the hell am I doing?