Love Among the Pizza Boxes

Why am I so dern embarrassed?
Playstation.
That’s why.
Because that totally sounds provocative.
Why did they call it a Playstation?
It sounds like an obscure sex toy for weirdos with fetishes.
Shut up, Shayla.
It’s a videogame console, for the love of God.
God spelled backwards is dog.
I didn’t clean the basement.
It doesn’t have any clutter or mess- it’s just dusty and there are spiders on the ceiling.
Sexy.
Hope Riku’s not afraid of spiders.
That would suck. ‘Cause I hate spiders.
I hate how it feels when you grab a piece of toilet paper to smoosh ‘em with and then you can feel them crunching beneath your hand. It’s disturbing.
It reminds me of the time when I was blow-drying my hair and I saw a baby centipede that kinda looked like a piece of fuzz and so I squished it with a bar of soap because I don’t like bugs in my bathroom. My bathroom is my private sanctuary and it is not to be infiltrated by bugs. Ew. So anyways, when I squished the thing- it screamed. I swear to God it did. A tiny little scream that I’ve remembered precisely. It was horrifying. So furthermore, I do not want to squash anymore bugs or arachnids or anything with an exoskeleton and bad reputation of sneaking into underwear drawers. – Actually that includes Lance. He’s searched my underwear drawer to see if I had a sexy negligee or a lacy thong or something. – Which I don’t. Right. Well. I wouldn’t mind hearing him squeal as I squished him.
“Uh. Well. Make yourself at home,” I say to Riku, gesturing to the grungy sectional that the CDC would certainly put a biohazard bag on if they saw it.
Riku grunts as he settles himself on the floor, propping himself up on his elbows and laying on his back.
I continue to stand around and I look at the TV. “Sooo… What do you want to play?... On the Playstation…” I kneel in front of the stack of video games in front of the big ‘ol TV. The only thing I’ve ever splurged on. “I’ve got 007 Night Fire… I suck at it… Hmmm… Kingdom Hearts 2… Final Fantasy 10 and 8… Hm… I’ve got Resident Evil 4… Sexy game… Ur… Tomb Raider… Also beast. And yeah. Das all.” And this is when I realize where I’m kneeling and that I’m exactly in Riku’s line of sight and my butt is probably all up in his business.
Welp. I can hope he didn’t notice.
Or if he did…
Well let’s just hope that my jeans really do make my butt look cute.
I swivel my head around to look at Riku. But not like an owl. Or a possessed child. I move my neck too.
“Resident Evil 4.” Riku nods to himself.
“Shweet. You chose well young grasshopper.”
You’re such a weirdo.
It’s a wonder he said yes.
Riku laughs. There’s that crooked smile again.
I smile along with him.
Not because I think I’m funny or anything.
I’m just smiling because he’s smiling.
So after smiling like a complete idiot for a while, staring at Riku like the complete stalker I am, I put the disc in and grab the controller. Well darn.
More of my thinking gone wrong.
-Again.
It’s a one-person game. Just like the rest of them.
Another stroke of brilliance, Shayla.
You’re the next Einstein.
“Hey, Shayla,” Riku says casually from behind me, eying the controller.
“Yep?” I stand up and whip around.
“I just remembered somethin’.”
“Care to share your knowledge oh wise one?”
“Resident Evil 4 is a one-player game.” Then he kinda chuckles. But I can’t tell if it’s at his own stupidity or mine.
“Uhhh… Yeah. I remembered that too. Well. Night fire is a two-player… That I suck at.”
Maybe Riku will take pity on me and spare me from playing it.
Because then I would become unattractively competitive.
I, Shayla, am a sore loser.
Crooked smile. “If I say I’ll go easy on you, will you play that game?”
I crack up.
Das naughty.
Code name: Naughty Kitten.
Naughty Kitten wants to play that game.
Especially with Riku.
Me-ow.
Naughty Kitten vs. Sex God.
Battle to the death… In bed.
Naughty Kitten will punish you, Sex God…
For the love of God! Shayla! Shut your face!... Mind.
Shut your face-mind... Mind.
Yeah.
Riku laughs, too. He laughs a lot. He laughs so hard his face is turning red. Then he snorts. And his face gets even more red. And he’s stopped laughing now.
“That was a sexy snort,” I say.
Riku’s face is hidden by his hair. “Thanks.”
His hair looks really pretty right now.
I kinda want to touch it.
So I do.
Only not in a weird way. I tousle his hair.
That’s okay, right?
And then I sit down next to him.
And feel the strange need to braid his hair.
Wait what?
He’s not a girl.
He’s a boy.
With some hair that’s silky smooth.
And pettable.
Riku sorta peeks out from behind his hair. He blinks once at me. In his eyes is a faint little smile.
AWWWWWW!
Mmkay. Resist the urge to hug.
So I grab his hand instead. And squeeze it tight in a hand bear hug.
Riku squeezes back wordlessly after a moment of hesitation.
I can’t help but grin, he’s so cute.
Riku smiles back at me. The crooked smile. His hair is out of his face now. Come to think of it, his face is kinda pretty too.
Boy did I luck out.
… Video games.
This evolved from video games.
“Anyways…” I start to say.
“Video games,” he finished.
“Do you still want to…?”
“Eh, I’ll pass. You can, if you want.”
“Naw. I’m not in the video game mood.” I say with some odd hand gestures that sorta look like I'm scratching invisible records.
Riku chuckles. “Alrighty then. What do you wanna do?”
“I want ice cream.”I nod and stand up.
Riku grunts as he stands up.
He grunts a lot.
He’s a grunter.
And a snorter.
He’s your all around porker.
Oink oink.
I hold back the giggles.
Giggling at your own head-jokes is a sure sign of insanity.
“You know a good place?” I ask after I’m sure that I won’t laugh when I open my mouth.
“Yeah, I do, actually. It’s called Destiny Ice Cream – corny, I know. But once you get past the name, it’s pretty good.”
“This ice cream will show you your destiny!” I kinda shout, slapping a silly, lopsided grin on my face.
Riku chuckles again.
Suddenly feeling self-conscious, I sober up and look down.
Ice cream.
The ice cream of Destiny…
Pfft.
What a crock.