Love Among the Pizza Boxes

Yup.
I’m going to the observatory.
I thought about bringing Alfredofred along, but then I reconsidered.
That’s silly.
Bringing a pineapple to the observatory to see the girl you’re dating.
That’s just plain sexy.
A real turn-on.
So. To save the planet, I walk to the observatory. It’s only a few blocks away.
I walk into the observatory.
Morgan Freeman and Shayla are conversing off to one side.
Her back is turned to me.
Morgan Freeman catches my eye.
I put a finger to my lips and creep up behind Shayla.
No…. I really shouldn’t.
That’d be mean….
I come up behind her and set my chin on her left shoulder.
What?
That is really weird, Riku.
What the hell.
What. The. Hell.
Oh well.
What’s done is done and what’s finished is finished.
Shayla just stops talking and stands there for a minute. She brings her hand up and starts patting my face and then looks at me.
“Oh… Oh hi!” She smiles a little.
“Hey, Shayla.” I get off her shoulder and stand next to her and Morgan Freeman.
I contemplate saying ‘hi’ to Morgan Freeman. But I don’t.
Shayla clears her throat. “… So, Riku, this is Joe. Joe this is Riku.” She makes a few hand gestures between me and ‘Joe’.
I try not to look disappointed.
Joe.
Why not Morgan Freeman?
Why not God?
I smile and wave at Joe. “Hello, Joe.”
He smiles too and winks. “Hello, Riku.”
“He sounds like Morgan Freeman, doesn’t he?” Shayla giggles.
I laugh a little. “I’m glad I’m not the only one who thinks so…”
Then I start thinking about my late-night swimming adventure.
Are elephants really afraid of mice?
I’m sure it’s just a myth.
I’m going to stop thinking about that now and focus on the present.
I really need to learn how to focus better.
Maybe I should take some pills for that.
I’ve seen them at the dollar store before.
No.
Just…. Just no.
“So… How’ve you been?” I ask. But don’t really aim the question at anyone in particular.
Shayla smiles up at me. “Tired…” She closes her eyes while she smiles.
Morgan Freeman takes this as his time to leave. “I should get going now. It was lovely to see you, Shayla.”
Shayla smiles at him. “You too, Joe.” She goes over and kisses his cheek.
Damn it.
No fair.
Morgan Freeman got more action from Shayla than I’ve had.
And I just witnessed it.
No – stop. He’s an old man.
You’re fine.
Morgan Freeman isn’t about to steal your girl.
What?
My girl?
She’s not technically mine.
I’d like her to be, but she’s not.
Not yet anyway.
But she will be one day.
That rhymes.
I’m going to shut up now.
“He works at my neighborhood pool,” I say matter-of-factly to Shayla once Morgan Freeman leaves.
“Really? That’s cool. Pools are cool.” She finds this funny and starts to giggle. She plants both her palms on my chest as she laughs.
I look down at her with my eyebrows raised and a small smile on my lips.
She looks up, “Hi.”
“Are you okay?” I ask, hoping I don’t sound mean.
Because sometimes, when people ask that question, they’re implying that the other person is going insane.
But I don’t mean it that way.
Because she’s not going insane.
I’m asking because she doesn’t usually act like this.
“Noooo…” She starts giggling again and then backs away. Her giggling dies down. “… So what brings you to the observatory today?”
Oops.
I forgot to think up a cover story for why I’m here.
So I don’t answer.
“Are you hungry?”
“Starving!” She grins like it’s cool to be hungry.
“Well, do you think your boss’ll mind if you leave for a little to go have something to eat with me?” I sorta glance over at the staff room.
“Maybe. I’ll go ask. Come along.” She starts to walk in the opposite direction of the staff room.
She walks over to an old guy talking to an old woman.
I decide to stand a few feet away.
“Hi, Harry. Hi, Ethel.” They say hello back and smile.
“Hey Harry, I was wondering if I could leave here for a while to get some breakfast?” She looks back at me and smiles.
“Sure. Things are slow.” Ethel answers instead of Harry and then she smiles like she knows a secret.
Harry blinks and then nods. He smiles at Ethel and puts his arm around her.
Shayla thanks them and then walks back over to me. “We’re clear.”
“Awesome,” I say, and smile my crooked smile. Stupid smile. “Awesome possum.”
She smiles up at me again with her eyes closed. Like it’s too much effort to keep her eyes open while she smiles.
We leave the observatory and begin to walk in the direction of the shopping center just down the street.
“Hey, Shayla?”
“Yep?”
“Are you okay?”
You already asked her that, smart one.
Nice going.
Way to repeat yourself.
“…I guess so. I just had an… Interesting night.” She grimaces and then laughs.
I raise my eyebrows. “Do I wanna know?” I kinda laugh.
Yeah.
I do wanna know.
“I don’t think so.” She shakes her head and blushes.
Well that only makes me wanna know more.
“What happened?”
I hate it when people do that.
Why don’t they just leave it be?
Why don’t I just leave it be?
It’s obvious that she doesn’t want to talk about it.
She takes a deep breath. “Promise not to tell?”
I offer her my pinky. “Promise.”
“Cute.” She smirks and takes my pinky up in hers.
She lets her hand drop to her side. “…I… My best friend spiked the daiquiris. And uh- and a blender married us.” She nods. “Yep…”
I spare a glance at her left hand.
She’s wearing a ring pop.
I clear my throat and look away.
“Sounds like quite a night.” And now I’m mad at myself.
Because it was so obvious that I was holding back laughter.
“You’re going to shut up. Because it was a beautiful wedding. And my stuffed iguana was the ring bearer and the flower girl and Zermine’s toilet paper dress was absolutely devine.” She grins.
Then I laugh. “I’m sure it was a very emotional service. I’m sorry I missed it.”
“… Yeah. Me too. Maybe I would’ve married you instead.”
Now I’m blushing.
Well god damn.
“Yeah, maybe.”
Nice.
She chuckles once and then grabs my hand. She shoves the ring pop that used to be on her hand on mine. “You can have that.”
I look down at the ring pop now on my finger.
Does that mean I’m married to her best friend now?
No.
No it doesn’t.
That was a weird thought.
So I smile at her and say, “Thanks.”
“Sure thing… So where are we going?”
Hmm.
Kinda forgot about that.
So I look around the shopping center. Because we’re in the shopping center now.
“Village Inn.”
Then I nod once to confirm it to myself.
“Awesome. I have a hankering for pancakes.”
I chuckle.
Hankering is a funny word. Sorta sounds like handkerchief.
“Shall we go in?” She leans on my shoulder.
I smile. Even though I’m not looking at her. Then I nod and we walk into Village Inn.