Love Among the Pizza Boxes

We’re in front of the observatory.
I hate goodbyes.
“So, uh… Have a nice day at work….?” Riku says hesitantly.
I can tell that he doesn’t like goodbyes either.
“Thanks. You too if you have work.” I nod a few times.
Nod nod.
I bet I look like a chicken.
Nod nod.
“I do. I just don’t usually have to get up this early.”
He nods, too.
Lucky. He gets to sleep in.
“Awesome. Well. I gotta go now. So…”
‘So…’
Great way to end a sentence, Shay.
Riku leans in and kisses my cheek.
“’Kay. Well. Bye,” he says. And then he waves.
I’m blushing.
I suck.
…
Never mind.
I don’t suck.
I don’t suck on anything.
“Bye,” I say.
Shayla.
Now I just plain don’t like you because you’re a pansy.
A scene from a movie plays through my head.
Heck. Why not?
I grab Riku’s shirt again.
And then I stop.
What am I doing?
Eh. Why not?
I get up on my tip toes and kiss him.
Longer than any of our other kisses.
I rock.
I’m a rock star.
But I’m not a Nickleback rock star.
‘Cause that kind of rock star’s nasty.
I’m just standing on the grass now.
Not on my tip toes.
Yeah.
‘Cause I’m a rock star.
“Well,” Riku says. He’s got a goofy grin on his face. “That was a pleasant surprise.”
Get used to it, because I can surprise you all the time, big boy.
…
What?
I smile. And then I shrug.
Because I’m a rock star.
And I really need to stop that.
He’s still smiling. “Well I’ll let you go to work now.” And he hesitantly steps back.
I sigh. “Yeah… Work…”
Work.
Bleh.
I like Riku better than work.
He pats my head once like he did before and slowly walks away.
Good bye, sweet prince.
…
Yeah.
It’s my head so I can say whatever I want in here.
I can say stuff I’ll never ever say aloud.
Like last night I had a dream about being pregnant with Riku’s child.
And I was patting my belly a lot.
So was Riku.
It was silly.
But it made me smile in my dream.
I’m smiling at the dream as I walk into the observatory and confirm that I’m here with one of the other employees.
And then because I don’t have any immediate jobs that need to be done I go to the staff room and sit on the couch and think about stuff I’ll never tell anyone.
…Or at least no one but Zermine when I’m drunk.
Yeah.
Like how I checked Riku out this morning.
And how I really liked doing that.
And that’s making me blush now…
I also think about how I made out with Riku’s mirror this morning after my shower.
… God.
Freak.
I was singing a song by Prince and then I decided to brush up on my kissing skillz.
Still doing pretty well from what I could get from Riku’s reaction.
It’s funny how all these things are revolving around Riku.
…Riku.
I sigh aloud and I realize I’m stroking the couch.
I stop.
…Hehe… I was carrying Riku’s baby last night.
I laugh aloud.
Whoops.
Some new guy looks at me over his pasta salad.
He leaves the room soon after.
He was the only one in the room.
Nice.
I decide it’s time to get back to work.
So I leave the staff room and run into Harry.
“Hi, Harry,” I say and wave right in his face.
He steps back a little. “Hi, Shayla. Look- I need you to go do a tour…” He looks over at a group of nose-picking kindergarteners. They’re pretty cute little nose pickers if I do say so myself.
So I nod at Harry and he smiles and says ‘bye’.
I walk over to the kids. They must be at summer camp or something. I smile at them and then their chaperone. She’s a young kid. ‘Bout two years younger than me.
“Hey, guys.” I wave down at them. Some mumble back and a few boys scream ‘hi’. Some of them just wave. “…Alright. My name’s Shayla and we’re gonna go look at some really cool stuff, okay?” I smile and gosh I sound excited.
…Cool.
The same boys who screamed ‘hi’, scream ‘yeah’. And then some other kids nod and some just pick their noses and look around.
Oh, kids.
“’Kay. Follow me.” I smile some more and point at the next room over that has a bunch of old telescopes and interactive stuff in it. And then I lead the group of little-legged ones and their chaperone into the room.
After that I hang around in the film room and make sure no one sneaks popcorn in. So I watched all the people watch the video about black holes and dwarf stars and such.
I do that a couple of times and a lot of time has passed.
The film viewing hours are over now so I leave the auditorium and lean against the wall beside some fliers.
And then I watch all the people go by.
Some more students, a couple of young kids making fun of how fake the stars looked because those kids are just plain boogers, an old couple jabbering on about Jell-O flavors.
And then I see a group of teenagers. They’re all probably fifteen or so. Most of them are just looking around or talking with their friends. But towards the back of the group there’s a girl and a guy just looking around sheepishly and holding hands.
And then I think about Riku.
And I smile.
And I smile a lot then and I can’t stop.
I sigh slowly and roll my head to the side and watch the kids hold hands and occasionally whisper stuff to each other.
It’s so cute.
I wonder if they’re going out.
That’d be cute.
Ah, young love.
I’m still smiling.
I sigh again.
I feel a nudge in my side.
“Huh?” I look over.
Oh. Hi Ethel.
“Hi, Ethel,” I say.
She smiles in response. It’s an old person smile. The knowing kind of smile.
I raise an eyebrow and turn my head to the side slightly. “What are you up to?”
She’s still smiling. “So what’s his name?”
Whaaaaa?
“Uh… Who?”
Ethel raises her eyebrows.
Dang. Stupid old people.
I sigh. “Riku.”
“Uh huh.” She nods once. “And you like this boy, yes?”
Like?
Oh, hell yeah, Ethel.
“…I-I guess.”
I sound small.
Ethel nods again, still smiling. “And he makes you happy?”
Is this a test?
“Well- yeah…”
What’s your point? Baby kittens make me happy.
…But not as happy as Riku makes me…
“Shayla, do you love him?”
…
Um…. UM… UMMMMMMMMM…
“Uh.”
Ethel smiles sneakily. “Think about it.” And then she walks off.
… Oh. Well gee thanks. Pffft. You’re just as bad as Joe!
…
Did she say love?
I know I like him.
A lot.
And he makes me smile.
And he makes me feel…
Well let’s just say he’s fun to look at.
And he’s fun to be with. And fun to talk to and just hang around with and…
I dunno.
I get tinglies when he touches me. Does that count?
And when I kiss him I… I don’t know but all of a sudden everything is… Whoa.
I dunno.
Ethel, you stink.
I sigh.
This is hard to think about.
I don’t like thinking this hard.
Stupid, Ethel.
…
Morgan Freeman once told me that I should listen to my heart.
… I mean- Joe. Joe did.
And then I got Riku back.
And I didn’t have to give him a second chance because he didn’t need one.
He didn’t kiss Kairi or anything.
So I gave him a first chance.
Because I listened to my heart- Oh, blardy blar blar.
Why do I need to listen to a little red thing that beats really hard every time I see his face.
… Stupid red thing.
Why must you be so confusing?
I glance up at the clock.
…
Oh look- I can go home now.
So I do.