Love Among the Pizza Boxes

It feels like ages since I’ve seen Shayla.
It’s only been… what… four days?
I dunno.
I lost track.
So I’m taking a walk with Ginny around the apartment complex.
And I feel like a gay man walking around with a Chihuahua on the other end of the leash. But I don’t care because she’s my dog.
I walk past a dumpster.
A man taking out the trash gives me the eye.
The eye that says something along the lines of ‘I’m a desperate gay man looking for some action and you’re sexy enough for my standards – wanna have a slumber party in my basement? I’ll let you bring your Chihuahua.’
So I look away and walk a little quicker.
When I get back home, I sit on the couch.
I consider turning the television on.
To watch some infomercials.
So, with a defeated sigh, I do.
It’s an infomercial for Zumba.
I don’t know what the hell Zumba is.
So I watch it.
It’s an exercise program thingy.
All the people dancing look like their having so much fun.
How is dancing like that any fun?
I mean, I just don’t understand the appeal of “And one, two, three, four! Step forward, step back! Now kick! And punch! Now take a break for lunch!”
Okay. So I made that up.
Zumba doesn’t really sound like that.
But you get the picture.
So my train of thought takes me to the night I went dancing with Shayla.
Now that was dancing.
Shut up, Gary.
I’ve decided I’m going to call Shayla.
If you miss your girlfriend, you’re supposed to call her, right?
So I pick up my crappy cell phone and scroll down in my contacts until I find Shayla.
And I hit the talk button.
Ring…
Ring…
Ring…
“What are you wearing?”
“How turned on would you be if I said ‘absolutely nothing’?”
Kay, so I don’t think I’ll ever be in the phone sex business.
Who cares?
We’re just joking around anyways.
Shayla giggles. “Pretty damn turned on, I can tell you that.”
I laugh. “How are you, Shay?”
“I’m great now. I have missed you. A lot... Oh god, I’m blushing now.”
“I’ve missed you, too. And don’t worry – I’m probably just as red as you are now.”
Blush…
I hate blushing.
Why do people blush?
I don’t like it.
Well – I don’t like it when I blush.
It’s cute when Shayla does it.
What?
Yes.
It’s cute.
Stop second-guessing yourself, boy, you think she’s cute.
She’s your girlfriend, you’re allowed to think that.
…
Well then.
Anyways.
“Well that’s reassuring… Anyways… Wassup?”
I sigh. “Infomercials. What are you up to?”
Maybe she’s not busy.
Maybe I can see her today!
Shut up, Constance, you’re such a girl.
Oh, you know you love it, Riku.
“Oh, nothing really.”
“Really? Oh. Well, would you like to come over or something?”
Please say ‘yes’, please say ‘yes’…
Shut up, Constance!
No.
You like it, Riku.
“Hmmm… I dunno. This ‘something’ you speak of sounds interesting.”
“Oh, it will be. But you have to come over to find out what it is.”
Even I don’t know what that ‘something’ is.
But I’ll figure it out.
“Alright. I’m game.”
“Great, what time do you think you’ll be over?”
“Well, you’ve piqued my interest, so… Soon.”
“Alright. I’ll see you soon then.”
“Bye, Riku.”

Hide and seek.
That’s what that something is.
Random, I know, but it’s a fun game.
I’ve always loved that game.
I sound like a little kid.
So I’m gonna stop now.
…
Ding dong goes the bell.
I hop up off of the couch and open the door.
“Hey Shay,” I say as I break out into a smile.
Virginity scampers her way over to the front door and her tail goes a million miles an hour.
Shayla’s face lights up and she throws her arms around my shoulders. “Riku!”
I laugh good-naturedly and wrap my arms around her waist in a tight hug. “Shayla!”
Ginny barks once.
“Hi, Ginny!” Shayla flops a hand in her direction and then pulls away from our embrace.
“So,” she says, slapping her thighs. “What is this ‘something’ you spoke of?”
“Well, though it may seem childish, I thought we could play hide and seek,” I say, almost skeptical about how she’s gonna take it.
She raises her eyebrows for a few seconds.
And then she breaks out into a smile. “Okey dokey.”
I smile back. “So…” I tap her on the shoulder. “You’re it!”
Then I run off and search for a place to hide.
“One…! Two…! Three…! You only get till ten, Riku!”
I laugh a little.
Hmmm…
Where to hide, where to hide…?
Ah. The hall closet.
I silently open the closet door and somehow stuff myself inside, then close the door behind me, quietly as I can.
“…Nine…! Nine and a half…! Nine and three quarters…! Ten! Ready or not, I’m comin’, baby cakes.”
I hear soft footsteps going about the living room and then coming into the hallway. “Yoo hoo! Riku! Ollie ollie oxen free!”
She opens the door to Ginny’s bedroom and shuffles around in there a little and then goes back into the hallway.
Her footsteps stop in front of the closet. “Come out, come out wherever you are…” She throws open the door and light pours into the closet.
I shrink back into the farthest corner of the closet, hoping she wouldn’t see.
“Yes, Riku, make yourself small because I totally can’t see you.” She pokes my arm. “You’re it, dork.”
I stick my tongue out at her and step out into the hallway. “Alright. Now – go hide.” And I cover my face with my hands and set my forehead against the wall and begin to count. “One… Two…”
I hear her scurry off into another part of the apartment.
“Three… Four…”
I’m getting very impatient.
“Ten. Ookay. Shayla… Where are you…?”
So I begin searching through my apartment. First in Ginny’s room – nothing there.
I check in the bathroom connected to Ginny’s room. I push back the shower curtain and there Shayla is.
“Ha – I found you.”
Shayla grins. “And now you gotta catch me.” And she dashes off, right past me.
“Aw, what the – “
So I run after her, chasing her down the hallway, around the kitchen, and over the couch.
I’m close enough to grab her now, so I wrap my arms around her waist and throw her down on the couch.
“Gotcha.” I stick my tongue out at her.
She wriggles beneath me and frowns.
I laugh.
She’s cute when she frowns.
What?
Yes.
I poke her in the stomach. “You lose.”
She squeals softly. “…Tickles…” she mumbles.
“Oh, does it?” I poke her again.
This is kinda fun.
“Nuuu!” She squirms again and starts giggling.
This is hilarious!
Yes, exclamation mark.
So I keep poking her because I’m having way too much fun with this.
“…Riku! No! Stop, stop, stop!” She’s still wiggling and is now batting her hands at mine.
“I don’t think I will,” I laugh.
“…Please, Riku!” Her eyes are watering and she’s nearly incoherent. “…I love you!” she yelps.
“I love you, too, Shay,” I say to her, smiling, and finally stop poking her. She needs to breathe, right?
It’s too bad she needs to breathe, though. That was the most fun I’ve had in three or four days.
“Oi.” She drops her head back onto the arm of the couch.
I just laugh again.
Man. I’m laughing a lot today.
How strange.
Shayla smiles and softly rubs my cheek with the back of her hand.
I hold her hand to my face with my own hand and lean down to give her a quick kiss on the cheek.
Shayla wraps her fingers in my hair and keeps my head down near hers. She brushes her lips lightly against mine.
I kiss her back and even though we’ve done this many times before, it still sends stupid little tinglies down my spine and awakens the butterflies that seem to live in my stomach whenever Shayla’s around.
Dang. I’m a poet. But this time I do know it. Because I’ve sounded like a poet before.
Anyways.
I’m in the middle of kissing Shayla.
But it’s getting very wet… Now why is that…?
“Um…?” Shayla mumbles and opens her eyes.
Ginny.
We just had a three-way make out with my Virginity.
She slides her front paws off the couch and barks, her little tail going nuts.
“Holy crap.”
And that’s all I really say.
That… is disgusting.
God, my dog is… special.
Aw, god. I don’t even know what to say really.
Shayla blinks. “Guess Ginny wanted some action. She is spayed after all.”
I blink right back at her. “… Ginny needs a boyfriend.”
Then I wipe the dog spit from the side of my mouth and look at my dog.
She’s innocently wagging her tail at me, her tongue lolling without a care in the world.
“Maybe we’ll go to the park sometime and find her one,” Shay says and then rubs at her mouth with the back of her arm.