A Loaded God Complex.

A streamer covered float drove past while I watched on the curb of main street. We'd gotten out three classes early to watch the homecoming parade, and four if you were someone in it. Pete, Nicole, and I sat in a line. Pete had his knees up and bent his elbows around them, Nicole leaned back extending her legs and I sat pretzel legged. The freshman float passed and Pete groaned.

"I don't want to be here!"

"It is-" Nicole started happily, only to have her sentence finished by Pete.

"Fun. We could be doing something right now, instead of sitting here watching brainless, rat-bastard, yahoos pretend that being on a float means anything. Over-rated." He spat.

"Ryan's in the parade." I quietly mentioned, only loud enough for Nicole to hear.

"Really? For what?" She asked, this grabbed Pete's attention that he was being left out and he began to listen a little harder.

"He was debating between student council and juniors' float."

"I wish I was as popular as him." She sighed dreamily.

"Jesus! Not you too." He exclaimed and then glowered at the oncoming float.

Fed up, yet again, I silently and independently searched for him in the crowds on each platform. He wasn't with the student council, so I waited for the juniors. After the band a red truck was pulling them up, standing I saw him immediately. Ryan stuck out easily, he was subtly clad in burgundy and gold unlike the rest of our classmates around him. He came over to the side of the float I was on, leaning over the railing he smiled wildly. Nicole had stood up with me and we were both waving, Ryan blew a kiss. Furrowing my brow I turned to see her as red as her hair. Ryan had already returned to the other side by the time I went back to watching the float. Pete was still on the ground with his expression vacant, but not dumb, and his mouth hung a bit slack.

Wordlessly I sat back down, the rest of the parade passed swiftly. Pete's mood got better as it neared the end, although my spirits weren't lifting any. Large groups of people with, rosy and fall kissed cheeks passed. We remained, as the sea of people parted around us.

"This is my last homecoming, guys. I think I should go out with a bang."

"Like what?" Nicole had much concern in her voice.

"I was thinking streaking at the game." Pete snickered, and Nicole smacked the back of his head.

"Don't do that!" She squeaked. The masses of people were thinning, this was usually the time we got up to head out.

"Yeah," I supported, "Unless… you want to stay here another year."

"They'd really do that?" Pete hopped up and stretched. His face contorted, his body flailed, and he let out a grunt, "That's gay."

A passing on looker grimaced and Pete showed no shame in using the word. We commenced fourth back to the school. Not many kids were still there, only the ones who were, were cleaning up from the parade. Nicole collected her homework from her locker and we were just about to head the front doors when we saw Ryan on his cell phone.

"Yeah Dad…" There was jumbled and low pitched rambling on the other end. "I know! I know…no one in the house without you there. Fine, bye." Aggressively, he hit the 'end' button, startled, he greeted us with a high pitched voice, "Hi!"

"Hey," We all said over one another. Pete was one with less enthusiasm and more sarcasm.

"Where are you guys going?"

"We were going to my house." Pete announced. Taken aback I whipped my head at him. My mom hated it when we went to his house and when he came to ours. We both were at an agreement that if we were all going to hang out it would have to be at Nicole's house.

"Have fun then." Ryan genuinely wished.

Nicole shrugged and went with the flow when Pete pushed through both doors to make his exit. My feet didn't move, Ryan waited expectantly for me to leave. I had merely forgotten about Nicole catching his kiss at the parade after I saw him in such a distress.

"Ice cream?"

"No, it is getting too cold for ice cream." Ryan grinned, yet he appeared ashamed of something, "I'd rather just walk around with you."

"Ok."

Together we went to the front of the school and went to main street. It was bustling with tons of town's people, in fact this was the liveliest part of the year. Normally I'd just avoid it, with Ryan it didn't seem like it could be that bad. Along the way we talked about the weather and how the school was thinking of adding a community help program.

"Here looks like a good spot." I motioned to a bench next to the town's barber shop. A man was inside have his hair cut by the extra jubilant barber. Comfortably we sat for a while without talking, a few people passed and one caught Ryan's attention.

"Does that guy really have two wives?"

"Bret Michaels?" I asked to make sure, with a creased forehead he nodded. "Not legally, the church just doesn't say anything because it'll give bad name to the Mormons… again. He's into drugs too." Snorting, Ryan sat forward. "How did you know that?"

"Someone vaguely hinted at it once." He took one last observation of the scene passing him, "Brendon, what else is there?"

"Well, do you see Shannon Tweed and Gene Simmons?" I whispered, he made confirmation, "They had all of their kids in wet lock. And Brittany Spears has bipolar disorder… Kayne West, he's the one walking by the bank, has Tourettes." Not once did I feel bad for gossiping, with Ryan it was confiding and just plain talking. He hadn't told a single one of my secrets, so I felt no need to worry, "And, auh…" I searched for someone else, "Jude Law had an affair with his nanny. Oh! And Vanessa Hudgens posted nude photos of herself on the internet."

I hushed as she made her way across us. She stared and squirmed as she must have noticed I was talking about her. I was making people wonder if I was saying anything crude or nasty about them and not the other way around. It came with an odd sense of authority. The more people passed the more Ryan asked if rumors were true. If he didn't ask about a person I'd tell him something, I treated it like a game so I wouldn't feel guilty.

"Thanks, Bren, this really made me feel better." Unaware that's what I was doing, I didn't question seeing as how I had been dying to tell him anything he wanted hear since I met him.