Scream Me a Dream

“Ah! Soya!” Jonah greeted with a smile, grabbing her hand and pulling her into the house before hugging her. “It is so good to see you home.”

“It’s good to be home.” Soya said carefully, not sure if she should hug her father back or not; she was still not used to this side of her father, and she still wasn’t sure if returning the action would be accepted, let alone how she would feel hugging him back.

“Soya!”

Soya turned, and grinned at her little sister, pulling away from her father to scoop Aida up in a hug, at least her emotions with Aida were still and always remained the same. “Oh! I’ve missed you so much! Just hearing your voice once a week isn’t enough anymore!”

“It’s so good to have you home Soya.” Aida whispered hugging Soya tighter. Soya put her down, only to frown at her sister’s short hair.

“Who in the world cut your hair?” Soya asked, playing with the short locks that now brushed the tips of her sister’s shoulders instead of falling down her back like it had that summer.

“Mamma.” Aida grumbled.

“She cried for two days after Elizabeth took her to the salon.” Jonah added in.

“Oh! I would have too!” Soya said looking up at her father before turning back to her sister. “Are you going to grow it out again?”

Aida shrugged. “Maybe, I don’t know.”

“I say you do, it was beautiful long.” Soya said.

“I agree.” Jonah nodded, “Now, you must be Ville.”

“Oh! Sorry!” Soya said quickly, noticing Ville standing awkwardly at the front door. “Ville, this is my father Jonah and my little sister Aida. Papa, this is Ville…” She bit her lip, before smiling up at Ville who gave her a reassuring grin back. “My boyfriend.”

“It’s nice to meet you.” Ville said sticking his hand out.

“Good to meet you too.” Jonah said with a nod, accepting Ville’s hand. “Your friends, they had a lot to say about you when we went out for lunch; I’m only sorry I couldn’t have met you then, as I heard Soya was trying to surprise you with her return.”

“And surprise me she did.” Ville nodded, before turning to Aida. “It’s good to meet you too, Soya says wonderful things about you.”

Aida bit her lip; much like Soya did when she was nervous, looking away from Ville and to her sister with wide grey eyes. “Isi got me something! I have to show you!” Before Soya could respond, Aida was pulling Soya up the stairs that lay a couple of feet in front of the door.

“It’ll be a while, follow me, we’ll go sit in the living room while Aida shows off Rupert the second.”

Ville smirked. “Soya told me about Rupert.”

“The rat was old, but Aida loved the damn thing I couldn’t help but get her another one. Have you been in the house before?” Jonah asked.

“Uh, just once before.” Ville admitted as he followed Jonah into the large living room, where a fire was already lit in its stone fireplace.

“Would you like a drink? I have some brandy if you’d like.”

“Uh…I don’t drink…anymore.” Ville said with a shrug.

“Ah, perfect, neither do I.” Jonah laughed, and as Ville heard it he could swear that he heard a bit of Soya’s laugh in it as well. “Well, sit, sit.” Jonah said gesturing to the dark brown leather couch as he took a seat in the matching arm chair that flanked the couch with a large sigh. “Mikko told me that the concert in Pori was your last.”

“Just a break.” Ville said with a nod. “Though both Mikkos are talking about touring again with the side band.”

“Uh…” Jonah taped his chin as he thought. “Linde? Correct? His band.”

“Right.” Ville nodded, shifting in his seat as he looked around the living room, trying hard not to fidget to much as he wondered when Soya would be back down.

“You can relax Ville, I approve of you.” Jonah assured with a chuckle.

“I’m sorry?” Ville asked, looking back over at Jonah.

“I have to admit, I didn’t quite believe the Mikkos when they told me you made my little girl happy, but the way she smiled at you just now, never have I seen Soya smile like that, not even when she was little. Though…” Jonah said with a tilt of his head. “Soya was a pretty sedate little girl, never fussy but never overexcited either.”

Ville couldn’t help the snort of laughter that escaped as he thought of Soya as sedate, at Jonah’s raised eyebrow, Ville shrugged. “I apologize, but Soya is anything but sedate. She has her moments of absolute calm, that’s true, but she’s a…” Ville laughed when he thought of how she had put his name in the GPS because she was curious to see if it would lead her to his tower. “She can be quite random as well.”

“I have no doubt in that. Tell me, Mr. Valo, do you love my daughter?” Jonah asked, leaning forward.

Ville paused as he stared at Jonah and couldn’t help but swallow the lump that had formed in his throat. “Uh, Ville, please.”

“All right, Ville, do you?”

Ville ran a hand through his hair, before looking back at Jonah. “Love is a very strong word, one I’m not sure Soya nor I are ready to use quite yet.”

“But you’ve known each other for nearly fourteen years.” Jonah pointed out.

“Uh…” Ville chuckled. “Yes, I guess we have, but we’ve only been officially dating for roughly three days. We’re getting to know each other again, so ‘love’ is a very long way away.”

“But you feel strongly for my daughter?”

Ville nodded with a grin. “I adore your daughter Mr. Toivonen.”

“Jonah, please,” Jonah said with his own smile as he leaned back in his chair. “And please don’t think you have to hide your tattoos on my account.”

Ville quickly looked down at this sleeve thinking that his arm sleeve was showing only to find it still covered. “I…uh…how did you know I had a…”

“I may have done some internet research.” Jonah admitted.

Ville felt the blood hit his cheeks as he blushed, he knew exactly what was on the internet about him, both in articles and pictures and he had no idea how he was going to explain half of what was there.

“Calm down,” Jonah laughed. “It’s fine; I didn’t see much, as I wanted to reserve judgment until I met you, I only wanted to see what type of music you played. You have quite the voice.”

“Oh, thank you.” Ville said blinking, just as Soya came into the living room followed by Aida.

“You bought her a new chinchilla?” Soya asked, taking a seat next to Ville as Aida went and sat on their father’s lap.

“Careful Aida.” Jonah said with a wince as he arranged her on his lap. “And I did, I know you promised her one, but she was so upset.”

“It’s fine.” Soya said with a kind smile as she reached over and took Ville’s hand in hers.

“We were just talking about Ville’s tattoos.” Jonah said, causing Soya to grin as she pushed up Ville’s sleeve.

“It’s quite amazing isn’t it?” Soya asked, tracing the outline as she bit her lip.

“Soya!” Aida grinned. “Show isi yours!”

Soya paused in her movements as she looked at her grinning little sister then over at her very amused looking father.

“You have one Soya?” Jonah asked. “I’ve never seen it.”

“It’s not meant to be seen.” Soya admitted slowly. “It’s on my ribs.”

“Well let’s see it!” Jonah laughed, causing Soya to blink, before looking at Ville who shrugged.

“It’s okay Soya! Isi has one too!” Aida giggled.

“I’m sorry, you what?” Soya asked, not being able to help the smile that tugged on her lips.

Jonah rolled his eyes. “Granted I was young, had just gotten into an argument with my father and felt the need to rebel, so I got one done.”

“It’s of lips and a tongue sticking out, like this.” Aida said sticking out her tongue.

Soy frowned as she thought of what it could be before Ville laughed. “You have the ‘Rolling Stones’ logo tattooed on you?”

“Papa,” Soya said slowly as she remembered the days when her parents would take her to the beach. “I’ve been to the beach with you, I’ve seen you without a shirt and I’ve never seen a tattoo on your body.”

“Ah, Aida hasn’t even seen it; I told her of it and showed her the logo. It’s not in a very…decent place.” Jonah grinned, causing Soya to cover her mouth.

“Papa, please don’t tell me you have a tattoo on your…”

“Yes, Soya, I have a tattoo on my bottom.” Jonah said rolling his eyes.

“He’s not the only one.” Ville muttered, thinking of the one he had on his ass. “At least he’s the only one with it, I share mine.”

“Well I don’t know.” Jonah said. “There are a lot of ‘Rolling Stones’ fans in the world, I may very well share mine with millions of other people. So, Soya, let’s see it.”

Soya sighed, shaking her head at the turn dinner had taken, before showing her side to her father and lifting her shirt up to show him the Heartagram that lay in the center of her ribs and the vines the crept up and down her ribs.

“Very beautiful, when did you get that done? I didn’t see it at your last recital.” Jonah said nodding in apparent approval as Soya pulled down her shirt.

“Um,” Soya bit her lip. “I guess our reasons are the same.” She shrugged. “The last argument I had with mamma a couple of years ago,”

Jonah nodded. “I remember that one; you were quite adamant about wanting to come home for Aida’s birthday.”

Soya shrugged. “I was angry, my friend was getting one done the same night, so I just…had it done. I use makeup to cover it up for my recitals.”

“What of the heart? It’s interesting.”

“Ville’s bands logo.” Soya said, looking at Ville with a proud smile. “It’s called a Heartagram.”

Jonah was about to respond but a clearing throat interrupted him, Soya turned her eyes widening when she saw the older lady standing at the doorway. “Oh, Niina!”

“Hello, Miss. Soya.” Niina said with a kind smile.

Soya bit her lip, squeezing Ville’s hand before getting off the couch to hug the older woman who had acted not only as a nanny for her when she had been younger and now for Aida, but as a mother figure.

“Nathan is still here, if you want to say hello to him.” Niina grinned, hugging Soya.

“Oh!” Soya said, wanting to see the older man that had spent most of his days driving her all over Helsinki, but not wanting to leave Ville alone.

“Go on Soya.” Jonah said waving her away. “I believe he’s in the garage playing with one of the cars.”

Soya looked at Ville who gave a small nod, assuring her he would be fine, before she smiled. “I’ll be back; I want to catch him before he leaves.”

Niina watched Soya rush off, before turning back to the living room. “Dinner is served Mr. Jonah, whenever you’re ready.”

“We’ll head in, would you take Aida to go wash up?”

“Of course, come along Aida.” Niina said, holding out her hand.

Aida nodded, carefully getting off her father’s lap before running over to Niina and taking her hand.

“Come, we’ll meet Soya in the dining room.” Jonah said, carefully getting off the chair and leading Ville out of the living room. Ville kept his forehead smoothed, as he really wanted to frown, something wasn’t quite right and the feeling that Jonah was keeping something from Soya had become much more prominent to Ville.

“I read that you had officially retired last year.” Ville said as Jonah took a seat at the head of the large dining table, Ville taking the seat at his left.

“I was rarely at the office anyway, the interns take care of most of the work and ever since I left the office, I was pretty useless over there.”

“I doubt that.” Ville said, taking the linen napkin off the plate and smoothing it on his lap, glad to have something in his hands.

“I don’t.” Jonah chuckled. “I was just an adviser after my term was finished. I still get calls for advice, but other than that, I’ve washed my hands clean of politics.”

“Are you enjoying retirement?”

Jonah nodded slowly as Niina came out with the salad. “It’s given me more time to spend with Aida, and I’ve been enjoying that time with her.”

“All right Isi, my hands are clean.” Aida said as she walked into the dining room with Soya behind her.

“Nathan looks exactly the same.” Soya said with a grin, taking a seat next to Ville as Aida took the seat on the other side of her father. “He’s just as fussy over the cars as I remember.”

Jonah nodded as Niina served them their salad, turning to soya, after thanking Niina. “Has there been any new development on your building?”

Soya shook her head. “Not as of yet,” she said looking up at her father. “I actually meet with Mr. Jolien next week.”

Aida looked at her sister wide eyed. “Are you buying the studio Soya?”

“I’m going to try.” Soya said with a slow nod. “Josef is going to come next week to take a look at it as well.”

Aida grinned. “I love Josef.”

“I know you do sweetheart.” Soya said with a smile.

“How is Josef?” Jonah asked, looking away from his daughter to pick at his salad, before pushing the plate away with a frown. “I read the interview you both did.”

Soya stared at her father as he turned his grey eyes on her again. “I didn’t know it had come out.”

Jonah nodded, calling for Niina, smiling lightly as she came out. “Do you mind going into my study and getting the ‘Dance Europe Magazine’ that’s on the desk?”

“Of course not, Sir.” Niina said leaving the room once again.

Ville turned to Soya. “I didn’t know you’d done an interview.”

“Rebecca set it up as soon as she knew we stepped foot in Prague.”

“She and Josef were named ‘Dancers of the Year’ by the magazine.” Jonah said proudly, causing Soya to blush as she felt Ville squeeze her knee.

“Soya, that’s amazing.” Ville said, wondering why she hadn’t shared that with him.

Soya shrugged. “It’s not that big of a deal.”

“Not that big of a deal!” Jonah scoffed. “Soya, it’s quite the honor, especially beating out the other contenders, Alina Cojocaru and Johan Kobborg being one of the couples.”

Soya winced. “Yes, well beating Alina and Johan at ‘Dancers of the Year’ is nothing compared to the honor she just received.”

Jonah rolled his eyes. “Please, the girl is an okay dancer and the award was only for Moscow, it’s not nationally.”

Soya shrugged. “She’s a friend, I won’t say anything ill about her and neither is my honor, it’s not even a real award, it was voted on by the members of the magazine.”

“Soya.” Ville said nudging her arm with his, watching her curiously as she moved her salad around with her fork. “You shouldn’t downplay something like this, ‘Dancer of the Year’, in any type of magazine or country is amazing. You should be proud.”

“Yes Soya, and I’m sure that if you work a bit harder in your next recital, you’ll get the ‘Ballerina of the Decade’ award just like Alina.” Jonah said absently as he looked down at his plate again, not catching Soya’s wide eyed gaze.

“Soya.” Ville said, taking her hand. Soya shook her head and pushed her plate away.

“Excuse me.” She muttered, putting her napkin on the table before leaving the room, causing Jonah to look up with a frown, only to sigh when he realized what had just left his mouth.

Ville ran a hand through his hair, prepared to stand up, only for Jonah to beat him to it. “I’ll go.” Jonah said. “I said something I shouldn’t have, we’ll be back.” He looked over at his other daughter who had been silent and was now playing with her food. “Aida, that salad better be gone by the time I get back.”

“All right.” Aida nodded, shoving a fork full of lettuce into her mouth.

“Perfect.” Jonah said with a smile, before leaving the dining room in search of Soya. Knowing that other than the study where he kept the families’ extensive library, the only other place Soya would go, would be upstairs to her bedroom.

He checked his study first, and when he found it empty he moved towards the stairs and made his way up, turning and opening the door slightly to Soya’s bedroom, sure enough he found her sitting at the large bay window bench, one of the pillows between her chest and knees, her arms hugging her legs as she stared out the window.

“It’s hard.” Jonah admitted walking further into the room and carefully taking a seat next to her. “After telling you your entire life, everything that was wrong with your dancing, it’s hard now to change it to tell you everything that’s right.”

Soya avoided his eyes as she continued to stare out the window. “You speak as if all I do is sit around all day, never practicing, never working myself to the bone that I just get out on stage and dance. It’s never been like that.”

“I know that.” Jonah agreed.

Soya swallowed hard before turning to her father. “Do you?” she bit her lip. “Do you know why being dancer of the year this year isn’t that big of a deal?”

“No, why?”

“Because it’s the fourth time Josef and I have won that award and the third magazine that has given us the title. As much of an honor as it is that our dancing is being recognized, it isn’t even the best award or recognition we’ve gotten as partners or as individual dancers.” She shook her head. “We don’t dance for the awards; I could give a damn about the awards.”

“Then why do you dance Soya?”

Soya shrugged, leaning her head back against the wall as she sighed. “The only thing I ever wanted was for you and mamma to be proud of me.”

“Even if it meant faking a romantic relationship with a gay man?”

Soya shrugged. “Yes.”

“Soya, the only thing that your mother and I ever wanted for you was to be happy.”

“Happy!” Soya scoffed staring at her father in disbelief. “Happy? That’s such a lie.”

“Never has it been a lie.” Jonah said shaking his head.

“Then why did you send me to New York?” Soya asked with wide eyes. “After I called you that first day in New York and told you how unhappy I was, why didn’t you bring me back home?”

“Soya.” Jonah sighed.

“Why, when I begged and begged to come home for the holidays did you make me stay, knowing that the only thing that would make me happy would be coming here? Why is it that for the past thirteen years you’ve kept me away from…” Soya stopped herself and shook her head.

“Ville.” Jonah finished.

Soya sighed. “It‘s not just him you tore me away from, it’s not just him I left behind. I had friends here, good friends, the type of friends I could never make in New York.”

“But he’s the one you missed the most.”

“Most days.” Soya muttered, shifting her eyes back out the window before looking back at the father. “Don’t say that the only thing you ever wanted for me was to be happy, and don’t you dare bring mamma into this.”

“Your mother…”

“I don’t want to talk about her.” Soya said quickly. “I just…don’t.”

Jonah sighed fidgeting with his hands as he kept his daughter’s gaze. “I’m sorry that I pulled you away from your home and your friends, I do regret that now.”

“Why now?” Soya asked with a frown. “Why now, of the thirteen years I’ve been gone, why have you picked now to be regretful? To take an interest in my life?”

Jonah shrugged, looking away, causing Soya to again get the feeling he was hiding something from her. “I realized that I didn’t know my daughters like I thought I did.”

“What made you realize that?” Soya pushed, needing to know that her father’s behavior wasn’t in passing. “What was the enlightening moment that made you realize that you had daughters at all?”

“That’s a bit harsh Soya.” Jonah said quietly turning to look at his daughter.

“Is it?” Soya asked. “You know, I do remember a time when you were a more active part in my life.”

“Do you?” Jonah asked with a raised eyebrow.

Soya nodded slowly. “Our trips to the sea, they stopped when I was about five,” she bit her lip. “When you would stop coming home, when you started to forget.”

Jonah nodded slowly. “I remember those.”

“So?” Soya asked. “What was it?”

Jonah sighed. “I didn’t know Aida called you every Saturday.”

Soya frowned. “All right?”

Jonah ran a hand through his graying hair, “I didn’t know she knew how to use the phone at all, I vaguely remember the day she was born and I don’t even remember feeling anything when she was. Then I started thinking about you, and I realized that I knew nothing about you, that your little sister called and talked to you more than I did. That in the twenty eight years you’ve been alive, the longest conversation I had with you was when I told you we were sending you away.”

Soya shrugged. “So?”

“That’s not fatherly is it?” Jonah asked with a raised eyebrow. “My father and I, we didn’t have the greatest relationship, we butted heads about everything really, but at least I had a relationship with the man before he died.”

He looked around the room, and was still amazed that they hadn’t moved a thing since Soya had left home thirteen years ago. Her clothes still hung in the closet, the pillows on the bed were still arranged perfectly, her rings were still sitting on the dresser waiting to be put in the pink jewelry box that had a spinning ballerina when it opened.

“Do you know how much it hurt when I called you that day back in May to just talk, and you thought that the only reason I would ever call you was because something happened to your sister?” Jonah asked. “Do you know how much it hurt me to hear the hesitation in your voice because you weren’t sure if you could talk freely?” He shook his head.

“Yes, well, twenty eight years of being submissive does that to a person.” Soya muttered causing Jonah to smirk.

“Well you’re speaking out now aren’t you?”

Soya shrugged. “What’s the point of not talking back now?” Soya asked, looking over at him. “If you were going to yell at me for something, I would have assumed it would have been over the tattoo or my fake relationship with Josef.”

“I’m not going to yell anymore.” Jonah promised. “I just…want to get to know you Soya.” Jonah gave a bitter laugh. “It was amazing to find out that your friends, whom you hadn’t seen in years, remembered more about you from the year they knew you than your own father. I had no idea that your favorite color was blue, that you knew how to cook or that you even listened to the type of music Ville sings.” Jonah snorted. “Soya, I don’t even know what hand you use to write with.”

Soya bit her lip. “My right.”

Jonah nodded with a chuckle. “That’s good to know.”

Soya swallowed. “I don’t…” She sighed and banged her head against the wall looking up at the ceiling blinking back tears before she looked back at her father. “I don’t want to get close to you only for you to pull it away from me. I don’t want you to get close to Aida only for you to close off again; I don’t think I could stand it.”

“Of course not.” Jonah said shaking his head. “I wouldn’t do that.”

“Wouldn’t you?” Soya asked. “You haven’t been the most reliable person.”

“I know, and I’m changing that Soya, I’m trying to at least.”

Soya sniffed and nodded her head. “All right then.”

Jonah nodded. “All right, and I am sorry for what I said downstairs, I didn’t mean it the way it came out.”

Soya shrugged. “It’s fine.”

“Obviously it wasn’t if you’re up here alone instead of downstairs with your boyfriend.” Jonah stood and held out his hand. “Come, he and Aida are probably sitting in silence downstairs.”

Soya stared at his hand for a minute before dropping the pillow that was now sitting in her lap and taking it. “Papa?”

“Hmm?” Jonah asked.

Soya chewed on her lip, staring at their hands before looking her father in the eye. “Do you think we could…hug?”

Jonah smiled sadly, before pulling his daughter into a hug. “I find it heartbreaking that you even have to ask me Soya.”

Soya gripped her father tighter as she leaned her forehead against his shoulder breathing him in. “Lemon.” She whispered. “You smell of lemon and spices.” Her voice cracked and she felt the tears finally leak out of her eyes as she buried her face deeper into his shoulder. “How have I never known that?”

“We have time pikku tanssija, we still have time.”

XxxxxxX

“Do you think he’s sincere?” Soya asked later that night as they lay between the sheets on Ville’s bed in his tower. Ville opened his eyes to see her picking at the sheets avoiding his gaze while she chewed on her lip.

After Jonah and Soya had returned, from wherever they were in the house, dinner had picked back up. Jonah asking Soya questions, while Soya answered a bit more freely and less hesitant then she had before she’d left the table. Ville had noticed her eyes had been a bit red and picked up the fact that she’d been crying, what killed him was he wasn’t sure if it was a good crying or a bad crying, as women apparently did both.

After they’d had dessert and said their goodbyes, Soya had driven them to Inka’s house to pick up her real car in silence. Ville could tell she was deep in her thoughts and hadn’t wanted to disturb her, knowing the if she didn’t share with him soon he’d shake the information out of her, so he’d turned on the radio and allowed her the time to mull over whatever had transpired between her and her father.

Inka had apparently noted a change in Soya’s demeanor as soon as she’d opened the door, having hugged Soya tightly before showing her to the silver Audi Ambiente that Soya had rented. Without prompting Soya had driven to his tower, had pulled in getting out with him and grabbed his hand as if it was her life preserver that was keeping her from drowning in her own mind.

As he let her in, he’d asked her if she wanted to see a movie and at her nod he’d taken her upstairs handed her one of his t-shirts and gone back downstairs to allow her to change while he put in the movie.

The rest of the night had been spent with Soya in his arms, hoping that the scary movie he’d put in would shake her out of her mood, but she’d stayed silent throughout the movie, only jumping when loud sounds came from the speakers causing her to look around the tower, then shake herself as if reminding herself where she was and what she’d been doing.

The five words she’d just spoken had been the first words she’d spoken to him in the last four hours, and he really didn’t even know how to respond to them.

“I don’t know Soya.” He answered truthfully. “As bad as it sounds, you know him better than I do.”

Soya bit her lip, still avoiding his gaze. “I don’t know him at all though, at least not this side of him.”

“What happened when you left the table Soya?”

Soya sighed. “We talked; he says he wants to get to know me.”

“There has to be more to it than that, especially for you to have cried.”

“Caught that did you?” Soya asked, looking up at him.

“Kultaseni, when you cry, I will always notice.” He told her, leaning down to kiss the tip of her nose.

“Do you know that I was about six when my father last hugged me?” Soya said looking at his shirt and picking at it, she snorted. “I don’t even remember my mother ever opening her arms to me. Not to say I never got hugged, Niina and Nathan were there, and then you, Linde and Mige were so affectionate when I met you. Inka and Elli hugged me whenever they could.”

“Soya?” Ville asked.

“I hugged my father tonight.” Soya said softly. “It was so foreign to me, it’s not suppose to be, is it?”

Ville shook his head. “No, though you did have a rough childhood.”

Soya shook her head as she sat up. “That is such…such…bullshit.”

Ville looked at her in surprise, “I’m sorry, did you just curse?”

“Well it is!” Soya said staring at him. “Poor little rich girl never got hugged as a child, that’s such a stupid excuse.”

“I never said it was an excuse Soya.” Ville said propping himself up on his elbow to look at her better.

“I didn’t have a rough childhood Ville, I had anything but. I got everything I ever wanted, though I was never spoiled by any means, I had a good and comfortable upbringing, amazing friends, I just had selfish parents.” Soya shook her head. “It’s not an excuse for never having hugged my father.”

“Soya you just said you had selfish parents, if they never hugged you, that’s on them, not on you. Like you said, it’s not like you were lacking in affection.”

“That doesn’t mean I didn’t need my mother or father to hug me.” She looked around before getting out of bed. “I need air, I can’t…I just… I can’t breathe.”

“Soya.” Ville called as she grabbed her converse and one of his hoodies from the ground and walked out of the room. “God damnmit, the woman’s not even wearing pants.” He muttered, slipping on a pair of Vans he had on the ground before rooting around his drawers and finding a pair of sweats, before putting on a pair of jeans and a hoodie himself and following Soya out.

He found her standing just outside the front door her arms crossed over her chest as she shifted on her feet, probably trying to get her lower half to warm up, with a sigh he handed her the sweats. “Put these on before you freeze to death, you should know better.”

“I probably should, not being here for thirteen years tends to help with forgetting.” Soya muttered, not bothering to go back inside as she put on Ville’s sweats and sat on the ground.

“Breathing better?” He asked, rooting around his pockets, finding a pack of cigarettes and a lighter before sitting next to her.

“A bit.” Soya admitted leaning her head on his arm. “I’m at such a loss Ville. I don’t know what I want from my father, my entire life I’ve waited for the moment for him to take an interest and now that he has, I’m dumbfounded.”

“Soya, what is your heart telling you to do?”

Soya bit her lip as she bounced her leg, thinking the question over. “That he’s hiding something.”

Ville looked down at her, blowing the smoke from the corner of his mouth as he frowned. He’d picked up on that as well at dinner, and though he was curious, he was even more curious about what Soya thought about the matter. “Hiding what?”

“I don’t know.” Soya sighed. “I just feel that there’s more to his enlightenment then just the fact that he knows nothing about me or Aida. Which bore my question of, do you think he’s being sincere?”

“Has he given you reason to believe he isn’t?”

Soya snorted. “How about the last twenty-eight years?”

“I meant recently.” Ville chuckled taking a drag from the cigarette between his fingers.

Soya shrugged. “No.”

“Tonight, was a very big step…for both of you apparently.” Ville told her. “I think that if you want a relationship with your father and he’s willing, then you should take it.”

“But what if…”

“What if Soya, what if, what if, what if,” Ville smirked at her as he put his cigarette out on the ground next to him. “So what if he turns back into a bastard tomorrow or next week? So what if he’s hiding something from you? What if he really just wants to know his amazing daughter? Are you willing to let this chance slip between your fingers for a couple of what ifs?”

He kissed her forehead as she stared at him. “Lock the door when you’re finished breathing.” He whispered, getting up from the ground and going back inside.

Soya sighed and looked up at the sky, chewing on her lip as she hugged her knee to her chest. What if, she really just wanted to get to know her father? What if something really good came out of it? Rubbing her face tiredly she stood up from the ground, picking up the pack of cigarettes and lighter Ville had left on the ground with a roll of her eyes and going back into the house, closing and locking the door behind her.

If her father wanted to get to know her, and her heart told her he was in fact being sincere, then she would give him that chance. She would give them both that chance. She shook her head as she set the cigarettes and lighter on the coffee table before heading back upstairs, smiling lightly when she saw Ville sitting up in his bed a book propped between his knees and another cigarette hanging from his lips.

He looked up and smiled slightly at her, patting the spot next to him. Soya smiled back before settling in next to him, leaning on his shoulder to read with him, her fingers running over his arm. And if her father turned back into a bastard she knew him as, then at least she had Ville and the rest of her friends to make up for the void, and really she couldn’t ask for anymore more.