Have We Gone Too Far?

The Next Day

After everything that happened yesterday I feel an awful lot weaker than before. It started with Mr. Baker. I don’t even know how he got into my room, never mind how he knew that I was here in the first place. He knows Derek... Maybe he told him. Then again how would he know what hospital I was at, or that I even went to the hospital. Maybe Mr. Baker was just here to remind me to keep my mouth shut.

Mr. Baker was only the start though. I knew my mum and dad would get here eventually, I just hoped they wouldn't come as soon as they did. To be honest it was nowhere near as bad as it could have been but that’s most likely just because we were in public. There was a lot of shouting but that was pretty much it; until we were left alone in the room anyway.

“Where have you been?” my mum hissed at me, getting as close to my face as possible. “Well? We haven’t seen you for days!”

I tried to move my face so that I wasn't looking at her but she grabbed my chin and pushed it back to her.

“Where have you been?”

“With a mate,” I sniffed.

What else could I tell her? It wasn't like I could tell her the truth. One, he’s older than me, two, he’s a man, three, he’s my student mentor, four, they might hurt him... the list goes on and on but I decided to stop thinking about that and try to focus on what was going on in front of me.

“Why didn’t you tell us?” she asked through gritted teeth as she clenched her fist. Her actions scared me but I knew she wouldn't do anything, not here anyway.

“Answer your mother,” dad grunted in the corner.

I can’t answer her. There isn't an answer I could give that she’d like to hear. Therefore there’s nothing to say.

“Zackary,” she said grabbing hold of my hand. I started shaking, why was she holding my hand? What’s she planning?

“I was scared,” I whispered, letting a tear fall from my eyes.

Usually I try to act strong at the start but they both now how weak they’ve made me. Their plan all along was to break me and that’s what they’ve done. It’s at the point where I'm scared to be around them, that simply seeing them could make me break down crying.

“What?” mum gasped, faking that she was shocked at what I just said. “What do you have to be scared of?”

“You,” I whispered.

She started laughing and sat down on my dad’s knee.

“Did you hear that sweetie?” she said to him. “He’s scared of us.”

As she said that my dad’s eyes locked with mine, but this time he didn’t look like he was trying to scare me. He just looked kind of ashamed, maybe even sorry... No! That can’t be right. He wants me to hurt just as much as mum does. He likes me being scared of him; it’s what fuels his attacks.

“Great,” he smiled weakly.

What’s he playing at?

Mum stood up again and came and sat beside me, running her hand through my hair. She wasn't doing it in a mean way or a way to try and make me nervous; it was like how she used to do it, before I drove her and dad to becoming like this.

“Why were you in that club Zack?” she asked me softly.

My eyes were looking anywhere but at her and that’s when they met dads again. He was giving me a look of encouragement. As if to say that he’s not going to let her do anything to me if I just tell them the truth.

“I don’t know,” I muttered.

That was the truth though. There wasn't really reason. Everyone else was going and I didn’t want to miss out, plus I hadn’t spent any time with everyone in so long.

“You do know,” she mumbled, seeming slightly more like the mum she’s been recently.

“It’s a stupid reason,” I sighed.

“Just tell us,” dad whispered.

“Everyone else was going,” I explained. “I didn’t want to be left out.”

Mum’s facial expression dropped. She looked so ashamed of me, but seriously what did she expect? It’s not like I haven’t done something like this before. The only different between past times and now is that I don’t usually get caught.

After what I’d said settled in they both walked out and left me on my own. They probably wanted me to think about what I’d done. The thing is that’s one of the main things I’ve been thinking about while I’ve been here. Why didn’t I just stay at Cole’s? It’s not like they would’ve hated me if I didn’t go. Also if I didn’t go they wouldn't have found out that I was gay. Things would be a lot easier if they didn’t find out, especially the way that they were told. It would’ve been so much better if it came from me.

My mum and dad went quite a while ago now; maybe they won’t even come back. They might just leave me here; to be honest I’d like it if they did. I’ve been told that I’ll be ready to leave later on today and the hospital are probably expecting me to leave with my parents, which means when I get home I’ll be completely alone with them.

“Hey,” Cole said walking into my room.

“Hi,” I smiled; glad to see him after all of that.

“How was it?” he asked me.

“It was...alright,” I smiled at him.

He walked over to me and sat down, holding his hand out for me, I took hold of it and smiled at him, most likely blushing as well.

“I love you,” he whispered.

I nodded at him but couldn’t help thinking back to that dream I had. Stop thinking about that! It didn’t happen!

“Where’s Zander?” I asked him.

He just said he loved me and all I want to think about is Zander. I can’t believe he had to be the one to walk in on Mr. Baker doing that to me. He’s going to be scarred for life.

“I took him home,” Cole sighed. “I told him it’d be best not to talk about what happened but I think we’d best just leave it for now.”

“Yeah,” I whispered. “I’ll talk to him about it at some point,” I sighed. “He deserves to know what’s going on.”

“Are you going to tell him about you and me?” Cole asked. He didn’t seem to mind if I did, I think he just wanted to know whether or not I was going to.

“I think so,” I mumbled. “I kind of want him to know,” I explained.

“If that’s what you want to do then I'm not going to stop you,” he said squeezing my hand a little.

“Thanks.”

“Zacky,” the nurse said when she walked into my room. I expected Cole to let go of my hand but he didn’t. “Erm, you’ve been cleared to go home and your mum and dad are ready to take you,” she smiled at me.

I nodded weakly, trying to hide how nervous I actually was to be at home with them.

“Okay,” I whispered, as I sat up and Cole passed me my bag. “Thanks.”

Cole looked at the nurse and gave her a gentle smile.

“Thanks for looking after him,” he grinned before walking with me outside of the hospital room. I thought it was a bit risky to be walking together, especially if my mum and dad are waiting for me.

When I got close to the room where my mum and dad were waiting for me, Cole decided to go off in a different direction. Part of me was thanking him because at least I won’t have to explain who he is to them.

As I walked in they both looked at me and then stood up. Mum walked off ahead and dad wrapped his arm around me so I could walk with him. It was... weird. He wasn't even gripping onto me that hard; he wasn't trying to hurt me.